The Lounge

4,946 topics in this forum

food was once our hobby but now that is gone and we must find new ways to occupy our time and minds. So what if any hobbies do you currently have? It can be anything from arts and crafts to exercising. Anything you can think of. Share pictures if you like. My hobbies are collecting comics and vintage toys but the main thing I am focused on is my art. I draw, write, sculpt and even sew. Currently I am working on self publishing my own graphic novel.

This is my first post in this forum, so, hello! In the months leading up to my surgery, I put my dating life completely on hold to stay focused on the labor of preparing for a huge shift in mind, body and soul. I was sleeved three weeks ago, but dating feels like a different thing now. I would really prefer not to divulge information as personal as a bariatric surgery to people i don't know and trust, but since relationships have a physical component it seems dishonest not to tell. In a year my body will look totally different. When we share a meal, and I can only eat three bites, I feel I will have to explain. Are you dating while in process of weight loss? Do you…

sorry for the ranting again, just need to get it off my chest My soon to be ex husband is moving in with his parents in the summer so he is packing up our apartment. Every day I have been asking him what day he is free so I can come over to help and to get the rest of my stuff and he says he's busy. He has commitments to renaisance fair rehersal and he has gaming nights. He gets super mad if I tell him to skip one of those things he does for fun so he can do an adult thing like pack, or if I say I'm just going to go over when he's not there. One saturday evening he sends me a text that says I'm free right now come over and help...it was like 8 at night and I said no. So…

I'm just curious what people think about this topic. I always thought that you need to really know a person before you can fall in love and now I am irrationally in love with someone I met 2 weeks ago and am trying to keep my head on straight. Thanks!

Post a cartoon, joke, quote or picture for laughs or inspiration.

He said he to wants to have kids down the road Everything was going so well...why oh why? I never wanted to have any. Now 7.5 months post surgery I can't even think about putting any weight back on I'm happy with my journey so far.

Hey guys. I just bought my tickets to the Star Trek convention in Cherry Hill NJ. It is in August and I was wondering if anyone here might be interested in going and maybe meeting up while there. Maybe have a meal together or something

Are any of the men game for discussing this one? A few words -- a cowboy reference -- of an exchange between two male characters, lawyer David Lee and investigator Jason Crouse, in "The Good Wife" fascinated me, as I'd never given thought to whether men might give each other the once-over either out of curiosity or another, non-sexual reason. The few words are funny, too and, to those who know the show, surprising. I'll refrain from describing the characters so that anyone who doesn't watch the show can make of them what they will. I hope that only men will post, but women are more than welcome to read. www.cbs.com/shows/the_good_wife/video/hnKrnqCiuNDqFtFLGJv_…

I'm almost 4 months post op. Even before thinking about surgery, there were small steps I would take to try and 'preserve' what health I had. (Ie- drink water, diet soda, bring lunch vs buying it etc) All the while I would hope my husband would adopt something for himself too... But he's his own person. He's never berated, bullied or lectured me about my weight, and I try and do the same for him. But, part of me wonders if he was kind of 'enabling' me, or simply not doing me any favors ignoring the 'elephant' in the room. But, it's nearly impossible to approach this topic of weight without seeming like you are 'fat shaming'. I see how physically unhappy he is with him…

We used to chat a lot in the evenings. It was a lot of fun. People could get their questions answered, as well as off topic chatting about real life issues and topics. Now the chat button is on a drop down menu when you use the button above called PATIENTS . If it said chat somewhere, would you check it out? Some people like live chatting, but it's not everyone's cup of tea.

... I decide I can handle the weight loss without surgery? As I posted in older threads, my wife was diagnosed with a very aggressive autoimmune disease last March. This was my wake-up call to change my life. I wanted to get my surgery done the last week of March, during spring break from the school district I work for. But I've already lost 33.0 pounds and my BMI is down to a 35.1(on my digital scale). My 1st goal is 200lbs and it seems much closer at 43.4lbs vs. 76.4 lbs. Do I get sent packing if I do this the old fashioned way?

Yesterday I leave work a little early and head to Macy's for some retail therapy. I try on a blue suede skirt, size 20, on clearance. Fits awesome! I went from a size 32 being too small to a size 20 in 9 months (two more days will be 9 months). I found a blue blouse to go with it and wore them both today with the white, black and blue duster jacket I have on in my profile pic. Anyone, back to the story about Macy's. They had this awesome black skirt with an overlay in black that looked almost like rubber, in a lacy pattern, and clearance price of $19, down from $99. Zipped up AND down the back. They only had it in a size 18, so I tried it on. It was so tight aro…

I'm so sorry to keep talking about my personal life But my latest divorce drama has given me a new motivation to work even harder to loose more weight. I want to bump into him months from now and for him to see me looking all sexy and skinny....and maybe on the arm of a good looking guy, while he is still all alone. Is that petty?

It's a made for Netflix original. "The Ranch" Aston Kutchar Danny Masterson Debra Winger Sam Elliot Outstanding show. I highly recommend it. I made it through most of Season 1 in no time..........

omg the saga continues....need to let off steam I am looking for lawyers and spoke to one briefly that mentioned I could get spousal support. I thought I would feel very guilty taking it knowing how tight he is financially now. Well today he is making it much easier on me. I am trying to be respectful of his polite request to be present when I come to our apartment to pack up my things, but he's NEVER home! Every day I'm like how about today or tomorrow or this weekend and he always says he has something going on. Then he throws back at me "what do you need that is so urgent?" Now I'm talking to him about some of our mutual things that I would like to take. I am cu…

My current desk job isn't bad. The people are nice, the actual work is ok, and I have some down time. But honestly every day when I wake up I just can't help think that I don't want to go. I have always felt like that with every job I've ever had As a tiny (and I mean tiny) side business I have an etsy shop where I sell jewelry and working to expand it to some crochet items. Oh how I wish I could just make enough money off of that to live on. I would be so happy

I'm 32 years old and was sleeved a couple years ago. It's completely changed my life for the better. My husband is two years younger than me. When we met three years ago I was 250lbs and he weighed about 285lbs. Now I weigh 145lbs and he's about 340 - 350ish. He has severe obstructive sleep apnea, has trouble walking up and down stairs, gets winded when sitting still, complains of joint pain, sweats profusely with minimal activity, has trouble breathing, and we almost never have sex anymore because its difficult since his stomach is very large and gets in the way no matter what position we try. Earlier this week he went to bend down and grab something and his pant…

Last night was the season finale...oh my gosh anyone watch?

PHEW! After several weeks of no internet or spotty connections I am finally back to the 21st century!!! I must admit that I have been a little grumpy without it and am hoping that now that our construction has progressed to the point of "mostly done" I will be able to get online a bit easier and more frequently. It is funny how I became so accustomed to jumping on the boards each day to see what y'all are up to ... now to go catch up on all I've missed!!!

WHOOP WHOOP!!! I am now T-minus 4-5 weeks till surgery!!! Met the surgeon today, they are sending all my paperwork to the insurance company and we will have that back in 2 weeks, then another week and a half or two till surgery!! Loved seeing him and when he asked if I had any questions and concerns about the operation. I told him that I've already watched the entire procedure on YouTube 3 times and know what to expect afterwards. That I'm not afraid and ready to go. He said he only wished he had more folks who had done their homework. I was in and out of his office in 10 minutes. Dammit that was easy! After the insurance comes back I'll have the endoscopy …

So Sunday I had dinner with M and some of his friends. The topic of my month long kidney stone ordeal came up and the joke was "was she making it up? I think she's telling the truth because it's a pretty elaborate story just to avoid a fourth date" Anyway, apparently my fairly limited contact was a puzzle to the bystanders. Besides MY medical stuff I was also intentionally taking it slow. What was happening was during times when my symptoms were ok, I went on some dates but much of our contact was by phone, email. I remember thinking " this guy is gonna bail on me because who in the heck gets a kidney stone shortly after meeting someone?" Btw, I have the same st…

I'm 6 months post 10/30/15. I have lost 103 lbs. I have great support from family n friends.. But I'm slipping...when at work I have Debbie, my fat girl inside my head saying I can eat anything now.. Go ahead, eat Cookies, or anything sweet. I want to punch Debbie.. ..how do I stop mindless eating of bad things? It's almost like I'm getting positive feedback on my weight loss, and I just want to ....eat.......what to do? Just kinda stuck... Sent from my XT1575 using the BariatricPal App

Hello Im Amber 23 From the UK, I'm weighing in at 324 pounds with a BMI of 55 and standing 5ft 6" - Im in some serious need of Advice. I have been considering a Gastric Bypass Band for nearly 2 years And have been trying to diet since i was 13. I have consulted my GP on many occasions and has sent many requests to the NHS to be considered for the surgery. Every request ( about 6 of them ) have been declined with the reason being " i am to over weight for the procedure ', even though i read that NHS must consider applicants with a BMI over 35. Now, I am considering in taking matters into my own hands and getting the procedure done abroad. Over the last 2 months i have done…

A 40 year old single mom was murdered and chopped up buy a guy she met online. They chatted for a month or more before meeting... and they had been on several dates/3 weeks into it before the incident happened. they went to the Marinars home opener game - so at least the date started out in public. According to everything I have read - she behaved in a reasonably prudent way in terms of length of time, going to public places etc. I am on a couple of local ladies Facebook groups and there is a general freak out going on "I am never going to date again" type sentiments. Of course what i know factually is you are much more likely to be murdered by someone you know - …

I am enjoying myself immensity with M. I sought someone with a compatible personality vs common interests and it is working out fabulously, so far. He is teaching me golf and he'll dabble in horseback riding. We both love games and play lots of board, card and dice games...and talk for hours and we are both very social. He is an attorney and kinda likes to"fight" - and politics is what we have chosen to fight about which seems to provide endless entertainment. I have totally met my match on the debate subject and love it too...neither of us take it personally and respectful so it isn't negative. Most importantly, we have incredible chemistry and compatibility - time t…

Question: What have you replaced your "food addiction" with? Me.... I can't stop buying sexy underwear.... I know it's crazy. But one of the first things i did was threw out all the un-sexy white high-wasted cotton draws..... Now i look forward each month to getting the coupon in the mail from VS. My underwear drawer use to be a sea of white ugliness..... now it bright and cheerful.... I would have said sex... but i don't think "by yourself" counts.... lol

If only the endocrinologist who monitors my thyroid were also affiliated with my health plan as a primary, I'd be thrilled. As he doesn't, I asked if he'd recommend someone. He erred in giving me four names, each of which looked good on paper. When I saw him again several weeks ago, I asked him to simplify the field and mentioned some of the qualities that I want in a PCP. He named one of the four, but I can't recall which. He hasn't responded to the email I sent the other day. It's one of two of the original four. Both meet my major concerns according to Yelp reviews by patients who give high ratings to their medical skills and attentiveness. Both are board-cert…

For me, one of the biggest benefits to WLS is the chance to regain my life and do things and go places I haven't had a chance to do for a very long time. In addition, I will eventually get to buy regular-sized clothes. From buying myself flowers, shopping at the local farmer's market, browsing vintage stores, to traveling, this article has some good ideas about how to save money while "living large": http://time.com/money/4275035/live-large-on-a-small-budget/?xid=frommoney_soc_socialflow_facebook_money What are some of the ways you have "lived large" after WLS?

I am nowhere near ready to date or for a relationship, but I have caught a few episodes of TLC's LOVE AT FIRST SWIPE. They "make over" some hapless person's dating profile, give them a style makeover, etc. Besides the fact that they seem to have total train wreck's as "clients", they have offered some very good advice for presenting yourself well on online dating sites. Has anyone watched this? Thoughts? Opinions?

I have a sweet female 4 year old, 7# purebred papillion. I am going to meet a rescue 4 month old yorkie mix.. She looks very Yorkie and her cross isn't known. I have lots of rescue experience but no experience with yorkies. Can someone tell me what they tend to be like? My pap is energetic,sweet and friendly but is bonded to me like glue. She is a cuddler and all around good girl. She hikes up tall mountains and runs circles around bigger dogs, paps are quite athletic and often used in agility. My girl has 2 jobs - looking cute and delivering snuggles and kisses. Sent from my KFJWI using the BariatricPal App

Hello, I work for a television production company that specialises in making documentaries and specialist factual programmes. We are making a heart-warming observational documentary series at the moment which follows single people living with different medical, physical and skin conditions, as they broach the possibility of dating and new relationships. We are currently looking to speak to those who may be interested in taking part in the series. We are targetting those in the UK and USA at the moment. For more information, please do get in touch: love@betty.co.uk (Alex has approved this post)

I'm sorry to keep talking about this, but even if nobody answers I don't have a lot of friends to talk to and it helps to get it out So I've posted before that I'm getting divorced. Recently my husband told me that a big part of the reason for him was that we were sexually incompatible (why didn't he say anything years ago?) One of the things for me was that some of the things he wanted to do I was uncomfortable with but I tried..some of the things I just didn't like or didn't feel good. Recently he started saying things like "well most people like this" or "normal people enjoy this". No matter how many times I would say "well I'm not 'most people' i'm me" he never got …

Got a call at 4am this morning from a client who's dog was having problems whelping. We kind of expected it as X-rays taken earlier this week showed only 1 pup. ( 1 pup = big pup = c section ). So we went and picked up the dog and took her to surgery. My vet got the pup out and I went to work on him while she proceeded to spay the mother (She's six and owner decided not to breed her anymore) Unfortunately he wasn't breathing but I found a slow, faint heartbeat. I kept stimulating him, swung him upside down to clear his airway, even did a little mouth to mouth. His muzzle, nose, tongue and pads were totally blue. After a few minutes he finally took a breath. Then…

I have been seeing a very wonderful person and things are going well. But I don't want to settle for the first guy I date after surgery. Don't have the heart to tell him that I just want to date. Did anyone meet the right person without having to meet others?

This has nothing to do with bariatric surgery. It just caught my eye and was humorous. There are positive benefits to growing beards. The added facial hair harbors various bacteria and some of these bacteria are deadly to very harmful bacteria such as E. coli. It is analogous to why we take Probiotics to restore the colony of good bacteria in the gut after receiving antibiotics. Except this is on the outside of the body rather than the inside. http://acsh.org/news/2016/02/13/beard-microbiology-grubby-hipsters-may-be-on-to-something/

I had a nice pile of shirts which were too big, so I wore one with buttons and told my girlfriend "you know this shirt is expendable, so if you have ever wanted to just rip a shirt off a guy, here you go." Wink, wink. After a moment, buttons flying everywhere. So now she lets me know its play time by getting into one of my old shirts. I think she likes it. Not saying it's for everyone, but I'm enjoying it.

I have been feeling CRAZY since surgery. Okay, maybe crazy is a poor choice of word. More like restless. I've been craving change and adventure. Today I decided to embrace this new craving and followed the advice of Tom Haverford and Donna Meagle: TREAT YO SELF. Now instead of lavish and indulgent meals I will treat myself in more personal ways. Today I decided to go with a new look: silver fox. ???? How do you treat yourself now that food is no longer such an enticing treat?

hey guys. My husband and I talked, and we are getting divorced. He was quite civil and nice about it when we talked about spliting our things. We don't own anything and don't have kids so I'm hoping the process will be smooth. Unfortunately we have to wait to file since it cost $300 just to file, and neither of us has that right now. Thankfully while I'm staying with my parents I only have a few bills to pay and no rent. But these last couple of weeks have been tough. I have no desire to do anything, no interest in my favorite tv shows, no energy, no real desire to eat, I just want to lay in bed with the cat. There are times when I just can't stop crying. I had a temp job…

I can only post in here, is there a reason why?

Here is a good article about differences in men am women's communication styles and the importance of asking questions (and listening to the answers I presume). http://qz.com/628724/the-gendered-way-weve-learned-to-ask-questions-is-terrible-for-both-men-and-women/?utm_source=atlfb

Just wanted to crow a little. At my year check up last summer I had reached a66% of excess weight loss goal. Currently I weigh between 172-174 down 100 pounds and a size 16 down from a size 26-28. The crowing part is my weight was exactly the same yesterday as it was six months ago. This means that while I'm not skinny I am able to maintain my weight! Yay! Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

first of all i want to say how great everyone here is and how supportive everyone has been with my previous posts. I have been staying with my parents for the past three weeks, and have pretty much made a permanent move here. I have most of my clothes, some other items and one of my cats here with me, and my amazing parents have bought me a bed and a mattress and I'm in their guest room. Basically while I've been here my panic attacks have gone away and I've generally been calmer and better. That's not to say I still am not getting depressed occasionally about the situation. But in the various conversations I've had with some friends and my parents I've decided that…

I keep hearing about that "act like a lady, think like a man" book. Reading the reviews it doesn't really sound like my world view (the tired saw that all men are dogs). Hell, at my age I am pretty stoked to find a guy who matches my libido...but I digress. since what I have been doing is no longer working for me, I am gonna change things up even if I have some doubts about the underlying premise. The big mistake I make over and over is narrowing to one person too quickly, I lose interest in meeting anyone else. This has resulted in a few relationships over the last few years, none of them lasting more than 3-4 months and i am tired of it. (Not entirely true, had…

To have a place to discuss adult topics like dating, sex, intimacy etc can be discussed without every prude self righteous person who has no actual idea of the context butts in? The trouble with private groups is they die away because there is no real way for new people who would appreciate and benefit from the conversations to join. I am still pissed because finding a partner is something very important to me and I am realizing that I am just not attracted to the usual "pool" and exploring my own self created limitations. A girlfriend actually said it, men in our area just aren't our types. I never really thought of it that way but she is right. We go out dancin…

TL; DR: this is a post about 12-step recovery. Your mileage may vary. food was never the problem. Food was the solution. The problem has always been the build up of normal human emotions. This is not an original thought from me, JWM. I heard this in an OA podcast. The speaker, Harlan G., discusses the twelve step recovery program of Overeaters Anonymous in detail, and at length, and describes how he has recovered from compulsive overeating, giving him 17 years of abstinence and several hundred pounds of weight loss, from a high weight of 700 pounds. I am blessed to have had the resources to get WLS and my LapBand nearly two years ago. I am blessed to have f…

Screaming laughing here! Just saw a TV ad for the latest dating site, although I'm not sure how much actual dating is involved: www.cougarlife.com "Meet Divorcees, Single Moms and Sexy singles looking for a young Stud! Start searching right now! - It's easy" BTW, the splash page urges visitors to see the commericial. It seems neither cougars nor their studs can spell or punctuate.

Today.

I found this on Facebook today and thought it was very appropriate for WLS folks. What are some quotes that inspire you on your journey?

Just wondering what everyone is watching now on Netflix or similar. What did you watch and love? I obsessively watched and loved Madmen and Breaking Bad. Currently watching Bombgirls. Who else?

As I sit here sipping on my iced green tea I look down and realize I am wearing a 6" heel like its second nature. I am all smiles. About to change into my workout gear and go hiking soon.