Please help me understand an episode I had on Saturday

So my brother's birthday was on Thursday, and on Saturday we went out to to Dave and Busters to celebrate, since we were a small crowd we reserved a room and did the platters for food

I stuck with bone-in chicken wings and water, only allowing myself 4 chips with guacamole dip

The day was going great, we were going back and forth to play and mingle, the issue was about and hour in, IDK what happened, I was only eating chicken wings and then all of a sudden I started stuffing my mouth and taking swigs of soda at the same time, my body started protested, my nose started running and I started hiccupping (my signs to stop eating), but I didn't stop, I would bite a wing, chew twice, take sip of sprite and try to swallow it all in one go, I remember screaming in my head "WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING?" and literally slapped myself to stop, I spat out what I had in my mouth in a napkin and rushed to the bathroom where I proceeded to throw up and cry it out for 20mins, I sent my brother a text telling him I wasn't feeling well and went home

For the rest of the weekend I just did protein drinks, half as a reset and half as a punishment

I really don't know what happened, I've gone out before and I always plan my menu before I do so that I don't overeat or eat wrong, but that day my brain just went nope and went back to my old mode

It was truly freighting, and I'm afraid that it could happen again, that now I don't want to go out in 2 weeks for a friend bday dinner

So has anyone ever had something like that happen to them? How did you bounce back?

So sorry you went through this. Obesity is complex especially the psychological component of it. And it is something that we likely will always carry. We learn our triggers. We learn how to better manage them but that takes time.

None of us is perfect. Slip ups and back steps will happen and that’s okay. Look at what happened not as a failure & certainly not something to punish yourself for, but as a learning experience. This won’t be the only birthday party, large group gathering, event or celebration but you’ll be better able to cope the next time by trying different strategies. For example maybe a time out would help: find a quiet place away from where the food is being served and recenter yourself for as long as you need before returning. (Say you’re going to the bathroom, or you’re feeling hit, or it’s a bit noisy, …) You might find it helpful to take a friend with you to chat with & distract yourself.

If you haven’t or currently aren’t seeing a therapist, it might be helpful if you can access one (your team should be able to recommend someone who specialises disordered eating & supporting bariatric patients).

All the best.

I fail all the time. To be honest I am good at it. Yesterday I had a protein breakfast and healthy salad for lunch and then my day went to SH*T, I ate chocolate coated ice cream bars. I am angry at myself but I am back at it today. I am the same person as I was before surgery, the only difference is, I will not allow myself to gain weight and it stay on my carcass.

You are still in the weight loss time zone so need to do the very best you can while it lasts. You have seen your alter ego, you know the signs and as long as you can rectify your mistakes after then you can do this. As Arabesque says some counselling might help if you can get it.

I have has the same thing happen to me. I am 11 months out from Gastric Bypass down 80 pounds and I feel like I am hungry all the time. I try to stick to the plan but sometimes I just don't even realize it and I over eat. I am back to tracking everything I eat to see what is making me not feel full.

I recently had a desire for chocolate chip cookies and we had purchased some recently so I ate one. Then another and another and it was almost like I was in a trance. I snapped out of it before the package was empty, but I am sure an accurate calorie count for that day would have been double what I should have, at least double. It happens. And I do know I was a little stressed and I am pretty sure it was a reach for comfort foods. I do see a therapist (have for years) and it helps when I am accountable to someone. I see her tomorrow and will fess up to the truth. You have to face these issues head on, accept that we are all human and will make mistakes. The point is to learn from those mistakes and take that knowledge forward to prevent future problems. You did NOTHING wrong. You just fell back into an old pattern... reach for the new. Hang in there! We may not be perfect but we are beautiful!

12 hours ago, Arabesque said:

If you haven’t or currently aren’t seeing a therapist, it might be helpful if you can access one (your team should be able to recommend someone who specialises disordered eating & supporting bariatric patients).

All the best.

I'm currently speaking with a therapist but for different reasons that don't have to do with my surgery , so I will bring this up to them, if anything to at least just ease my mind, thank you for your words.

Honestly, It happens to all of us! We have the obesity disease and our binge eating comes back, but I will say punishing yourself is furthering your bad relationship with food. (I say this because this has taken me a very long time to recognize this) Its okay to say "this day happened time to just get back on track" Something I have learned in my short almost 2yrs is that life is going to happen, events, delicious food and its okay to enjoy these things. We just need to learn moderation- learning to have a healthy relationship with all foods. The all the time foods and sometimes foods. Easier said then done but look how far you have come! your doing amazing and you should be so proud! Now your back on track and eff it that day happened. <3

I'm so sorry the disease of obesity is horrible. It's the most heartless disease of them all. It's just so many things that go into being obese. You have the mental the physical at play. What I have started doing, before I go out somewhere... I eat before I go, and then when I get there, I'm just not interested. I think a lot of it is our mind. If it were easy, we would have not had the surgery and done it on our own unfortunately we have so many things that we have to work on.

Edited September 23, 2025Sep 23 by Mspretty86

Hi, as it was at a party, I'd question your emotional link with food on that occasion. Was it because you associate food with socialisng and lack strategies to manage reduced eating in environments out of your control? Did you know and feel comfortable with the guests present? Did you feel anxious and use food for comfort as before? How many know about your surgery? Did you feel pressured to look and behave a certain way following this perceived 'miracle cure'? I'm only 5 days in so I'm also anxious about strategies for future social & professional. occasions, especially with people who I don't want to share this personal journey with.

10 hours ago, Slimberdade said:

Hi, as it was at a party, I'd question your emotional link with food on that occasion. Was it because you associate food with socializing and lack strategies to manage reduced eating in environments out of your control? Did you know and feel comfortable with the guests present? Did you feel anxious and use food for comfort as before? How many know about your surgery? Did you feel pressured to look and behave a certain way following this perceived 'miracle cure'? I'm only 5 days in so I'm also anxious about strategies for future social & professional. occasions, especially with people who I don't want to share this personal journey with.

I do associate food as a social thing, so many connections can be made thru food, and since I got my surgery I have planned how and when to eat, especially going out to a restaurant or a house party, I felt comfortable with the guest list, and I was very open from the beginning on my surgery, my friend and coworkers know so I don't feel pressured to eat or drink anything to fit in the social setting

That's why Saturdays episode was so odd to me, I thought I was doing everything right and then all of sudden to go back to how I just to eat made me scared

For me, I didn't join any social setting for abut 2 months, I first wanted to go thru my stages of food and to gauge how much I can eat so that I could plan meals

I hope that once you're ready to go out again, you don't have too much anxiety around it, for now, all I can say is take it a day at a time.

I completely understand. I had a mini-meltdown during the first day of my clear liquid diet. I was basically saying goodbye to food as I knew it. I was grieving my eating habits.

I, personally, still have an addiction to food. Food has always been a constant in my life. When there was nobody to lean on, food always had my back. But, that's trauma speaking.

I'm planning on going to a Food Addicts Anonymous session. There's also Overeaters Anonymous. I believe they both have websites. I suggest looking into resources like this that are free. I wanted to get therapy at one point - however, these sessions are free! They also host their sessions in-person, and via Zoom.

I went to Half Price Books and bought the official Food Addicts Anonymous book. I am going to be attending one of their Zoom sessions to see if it helps.

This chapter in my life is not just physical. It's mental, too. That's why I'm trying to heal both <3

I know you can overcome this obstacle. :)

It sounds like you experienced a sudden loss-of-control eating episode, which can happen when stress, social settings, or old habits resurface unexpectedly. The runny nose, hiccups, and nausea were your body’s signals, but panic made it hard to stop in the moment. What matters is you recognized it, stepped away, and took care of yourself. Try not to punish yourself afterward — instead, focus on balanced meals, rest, and gentle self-care. For your next outing, eat a small snack beforehand, set simple limits, and practice a quick grounding technique like slow breathing. One episode doesn’t erase your progress, and with a bit of planning you can feel more in control next time.

That sounds really difficult, and you're not the only one who suddenly loses control when eating. Stress, limitations, or emotions—rather than weakness—can cause it. Return to eating healthy meals regularly and practicing self-compassion instead of punishing yourself. Speaking with a therapist or nutritionist might help you understand and avoid it in the future if it continues to worry you.

UPDATE: I think I finally figured out what happened, I know it's was months ago, and I should have moved on already but I don't like to leave things unresolved

Since surgery, when ever I eat, I always use a knife and fork now, to help keep all my bites small and to allow myself time between bites

On the day of the incident, I did eat my chicken wings with a knife and fork, all good there, but the 2nd time around, I used my hands to pick up the wing, I'm pretty sure that's what did it, my body was so used to just use my hands to eat and drink at the same time that my old habit came back around

I know that mulling over this for months probably wasn't the best use of my time, but now that I have an answer, I can finally put this event to rest and move on with my life.