A 40 year old single mom was murdered and chopped up buy a guy she met online. They chatted for a month or more before meeting... and they had been on several dates/3 weeks into it before the incident happened. they went to the Marinars home opener game - so at least the date started out in public. According to everything I have read - she behaved in a reasonably prudent way in terms of length of time, going to public places etc.

I am on a couple of local ladies Facebook groups and there is a general freak out going on "I am never going to date again" type sentiments.

Of course what i know factually is you are much more likely to be murdered by someone you know - which is a disgusting fact in and of itself - but, it still casts a bit of a worrisome doubt.

As it applies to me, I very much trust the man I am seeing, I have met his friends, I know where he works etc. so I have no feeling that I should be afraid. However, that creeping anxiety remains.

Sometimes people in this world really suck.

He has more of a criminal history than I first realized but nothing like this or even remotely so. They are looking into unsolved disappearances because it seems unlikely that this incident was his first serious offense given the gruesome and crazy-ass nature.

This story is appalling on so many levels and of course the tragedy of three kids who lost a good mom. My local facebook exploded over this because honestly most women who have dated someone for a month do things like get in a car with a man. I realize this had nothing really to do with online dating, but it's scary. The man I am dating lost a niece to homicide..a man she met out dancing/in a bar killed her, so sickos find victims in different ways.

In another thread there was all this talk about being safe with your concealed carry. Well, I have been attacked by a crazy person ( knew him for many months at work) and a gun would not have helped. I was surprised ( he had shown no signs of violence) and quickly physically over powered. If I had managed to pull a gun, he would very likely disarmed me as I had totally lost control of the situation. It is my view that self defense training should be about getting away and running like hell.

I saw the article...she was a beautiful lady....what in the hell is wrong with him?No one knew he was crazy???He must have committed other crimes...He is insane.Very disturbing.

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No death penalty ...he gets to get 3 square meals a day...I am just sickened.

Somehow he has done this before...you just don't just wake up and achieve this level of depraved craziness...Very sad about her.

I saw the article...she was a beautiful lady....what in the hell is wrong with him?No one knew he was crazy???He must have committed other crimes...He is insane.Very disturbing.

His mom and dad knew he was crazy. they got a restraining order on him a couple years ago for threatening them. The whole family knew he was crazy, and violent when he drank. So they kept their distance.

This woman lived in the same areas as I do... It is incredibly sad. I hope that her children are well cared for and that other people take caution when meeting strangers. I mean strangers anywhere. A bar, online, or in a parking lot. You never know, but do your best to take care.

Well, every new friend in life WAS a stranger. If you aren't single you don't understand that it's impossible to hire an investigator for every possible date. I personally think she did nothing rash or crazy risky from the facts that were presented. I personally would not invite someone to my home after 3-4 weeks, but I did after 8 weeks and honestly what difference would that make for this victim?

As I mentioned when I was assaulted by a mentally ill person I knew him through work and we were not dating. Violent manipulative people will bide their time.

There is nothing to be learned from this tragedy because unless she had hired an investigator she would never have found the clues to his unstable history.

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Well, every new friend in life WAS a stranger. If you aren't single you don't understand that it's impossible to hire an investigator for every possible date. I personally think she did nothing rash or crazy risky from the facts that were presented. I personally would not invite someone to my home after 3-4 weeks, but I did after 8 weeks and honestly what difference would that make for this victim?

As I mentioned when I was assaulted by a mentally ill person I knew him through work and we were not dating. Violent manipulative people will bide their time.

There is nothing to be learned from this tragedy because unless she had hired an investigator she would never have found the clues to his unstable history.

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Also, Background checks arent really helpful if someone was never caught or charged with violent crimes. Sometimes, you are the first one. Sometimes, they are an upstanding member of the community that people "never thought would be capable of that".

That...and when people say "BACKGROUND CHECKS LADIES!!!" its victim blaming. Like if she would have done her homework, followed certain steps, she wouldnt have been murdered. He was going to kill someone. Thats on him.