Just wondering if anyone is keeping their sleeve a secret and how it worked out for them? I know you need a support system but I am only telling literally 2 people, besides my hubbs of course! We live far away from family and only see them a few times a year so they will not be able to really support me in any way and i only have a few friends who see me on a regular basis. I just don't want to tell people i had to get surgery to lose weight and have to validate my reasons to them. Do you think its wrong?

No shame in my game.. If someone ask I will tell them maybe I can bring helpful information to someone else who needs it. Everyone has been supportive and really kool about it.

Ii only told a few people. I didn't want to deal with the negative comments from those who have thought that I should be able to loose the weight by dieting and exercising. Well I have been doing that for 40 years and it did not work. I was sleeved April 9, and have lost 32 pounds. I have had to cut my blood pressure meds in half and I don't need my CPAP any more. I am taking care of me the best way I can. Just do what you are comfy doing. This is about you!!

Make it easy on yourself. Don't go running around yelling it the world that youve had it done..tell ur immediate family, clothes friends if you wish that's up to u.but honestly if people ask and u want to share that info then that's is the time to do it, otherwise its not there business to know...People naturally come to there own conclusions anyway.

I would think most people wouldn't want to talk about it, would consider it tmi. Most people who are "friends" or acquaintances really just don't care that much about us. Also, It is distracting to talk about it in the workplace and wastes time that should be spent working.

I have not kept it a secret, but I have tried to manage the when/who knew aspect.

My first confession was to my very close friend. I needed her support and affirmation that I could do this. I went to the surgeon before telling my husband, because I knew he would have questions and he is such a worry wart, I wanted to make sure I had information and answers to provide to him. The next person I told was my brother, with whom I am very close, and he has been imploring me for years to get my weight under control. Surprisingly, he was very concerned about me making this choice, but as I've been able to answer all of his questions confidently, he has since come around to accepting it, and has resumed being extremely supportive. Next, I told my Mother, Sister, and children, and then lastly my Dad. All of whom (except one child) live in a different state, so I debated on telling them at all, or just surprising them the next time they saw me... I'm just too excited about doing the surgery to keep my mouth shut, so I told them as soon as I saw them last week! LOL

As for work, I have again been very selective. I've told immediately those whom I felt would be supportive and encouraging. There are others who I have not told, but through one way or another have found out, but since I didn't tell them, they've wisely kept mum to me about it. I think they know, it's not really their business and unless I volunteer to talk to them about it, they are satisfied in simply knowing.

I will say that as the surgery date gets closer and closer, I can't seem to shut up about it. I told the person sitting next to me on the plane last week that I was doing this!! LOL

No one can tell you how to handle this news. The most important thing to remember is that you MUST have supportive people around you. You need cheer leaders, and that is not something I've experienced in the past. Begin small, and tell one or two people, and gauge their reaction. Gauge yours as well. I wouldn't suggest telling perfect strangers, but I bet you that there are people in your life that care very deeply about you, and would be thrilled to know that you are making this positive change in your life!

Good luck to you!!!

Help!!! I only told a handful of people..not my mother or family..does this make me a horrible person?? like many out there..I don't want to hear their 2 cents or the comments such as "oh you took the easy way out" "why not just eat less and excersice" ... I don't want to be looked as a liar because I'm Not!! I just don't want to share the information..it's killing me not telling my mom..we share everything ..but she also worries so much..help!

This is exactly my situation!..I'm feeling so guilty not telling my dad and brothers!

It's starting to weigh heavy lol ( no pun intended) cause I'm having surgery In 9 days and I need to be at peace with my decision , I am not a liar and i tel them everything else about my life ..I don't want to have to tell them if I have complications ...so conflicted!! Nice to not feel alone!

I feel good about the decisions i have made so far on who to tell. My surgery is the day after tomorrow and i have yet to tell mu only child, who is almost 7 years old. I don't know how to handle that conversation yet.

I've told my son, sister and mother. My son is like most guys and just goes with the flow. He doesn't asks many questions and just waits to be told what to do and where to be. I've raised him well! My sister wants to have the procedure and is going to watch my progress closely. My mom is not happy at all but very supportive. She said the same old mom thing, "you are beautiful just the way you are." Moms are awesome! I also told my boss and the two other people in my department. We are a small and close department in a small hospital and I don't mind them knowing. I have no desire to tell anyone else at work and will probably just talk about diet changes when people start asking questions. I also told my best girl friend. I'm single and not dating anyone special right now and know that I will probably never tell anyone that I am just dating.

I will be sleeved in 48 hours and can't wait to get on the other side of this procedure and on with my life. I am scheduled for 2 weeks off work but will probably take 3 as I do marketing and it is a lot of running around and no access to any place to keep my protien shakes cold. I at least want to be well into the mushy diet before I go back.

NoTime: you must be a supervisor I am way too open with everything that is going on in my life and everyone I know knows that I have been struggling and suffering for many years with being morbidly obese. So when I decided to get the VSG I shared that info with everyone and most have been very supportive and understanding and excited for me. Some, like I was, are against WLS altogether and they have pretty much kept their thoughts to themselves. I have been picked on a little because I eat like a bird now but I expected that (I dish it out too :-) .

I'm 6 weeks out now. I don't broadcast my surgery but I let people know that I feel

I'm 6 weeks out now. I don't broadcast my surgery but I let people know that I feel

Oops! Anyway...I'm 6 weeks out now. I don't broadcast my surgery but I let people know that I feel wouldn't broadcast it either. I was recently asked by a staff member of my apartment building how I'm losing the weight...I just said I've been working out and watching what I eat (this is being truthful and not letting her all in my business). I also have a FB friend that asked in a recent pic I put up if I had surgery. This annoyed me so much, considering she already knows that but to comment on a pic and ask me that was rude! I'm a somewhat private person and I did not display anything about my surgery, so what makes her think she can? The nerve of some people! Did I mention she is really a friend of my best friend and I don't care for her too much...

Most of the employees in my office are women and we have 70 employees. I told my secretary and the office manager I was having a sleeve done prep. Postop word got out pretty quickly so I just admitted that I had the surgery, it saves me time having to explain my weight loss. My staff has been supportive and sent me get well cards, a balloon, and a stuffed possum I gave to my son and told him it was templeton the rat(he is 5). Post op a couple of my staff that weren't told acted a bit hurt. For me it would have been incredibly difficult to keep the sleeve private since a few ladies in my office love to ferret out gossip and being one of the partners it would become public quickly, regardless of who I told.

My immediate family knows, aunts/uncles/cousins do not. A few friends know, coincidentally none of them live in the same state as me. Work knows I have (had) a lap-band, and that I've had surgery, and a few co-workers know that my surgery was related to my lap-band. They can draw whatever conclusions they want.

When I had my band I told anyone who asked. I didn't advertise it, nor did I hide it. This time around I just didn't want to deal with having to explain what happened, why, what was being done to fix it, etc.

I am like you...when I had my band I told everyone...but it was a whopping failure so now I don't really want to tell anyone. Only my husband, youngest daughter and mother know. At work I just told them I was having the band removed. I think after being such a failure with the band I just don't want anyone to know...I guess I am afraid I will fail again!

I don't volunteer it to anybody except my wife, best friend, & mom. But I also don't consider it a secret, these are the people I talk to the most. If anybody asks notices I don hesitate to lay it out for them.

The reason I don't volunteer the news is, it's become my experience that most people have no idea what VSG is and immediately equate it to RNY & all the horror stories tied to it. I simpl don't have the time or desire to educate 1/2 the local population on VSG

My parents, my sister and her hubby, who is my pcp, and my hubby of course. I told a co worker who got sleeved in Feb also. I am going to tell my daughters the night before the surgery. That's it for now. Others will be on a need to know bases. I am scheduled during my 3 week summer break so hopefully I will not need to ask for more time off.