Just wondering if anyone is keeping their sleeve a secret and how it worked out for them? I know you need a support system but I am only telling literally 2 people, besides my hubbs of course! We live far away from family and only see them a few times a year so they will not be able to really support me in any way and i only have a few friends who see me on a regular basis. I just don't want to tell people i had to get surgery to lose weight and have to validate my reasons to them. Do you think its wrong?

Those in laws are horrible busy bodies. What do they care as long as you and your husband are happy. Dang nosy in laws!

This is a very individual and personal decision. I told everyone and have posted on Facebook to keep family and friends up to date on my progress.

Hey VST Family,

Im new to this site and just recently got the sleeve procedure done on April 30, 2012. I had the lap band done March 17, 2012 and had it removed this year. Due to unhealthy food choices I gained that weight back and wanted to get a fresh start; so I decided to get the sleeve surgery. I have chosen to only share with my intimate family (mom, sister and brother). Since the lap band was not sucessful for me I want to prove to myself that I can get healthy and lose this weight for good choosing healthy food choices, excercise and with the support of those going through the weight loss journey such as this VST group, family, doctor and dietician. Im so motivated to get this weight off and keeping it off FOREVER. Looking forward to growing, losing and sharing with you all.

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Personally, If I had this done 5-10 years ago, I would have tried hard to keep it a secret except from my husband and parents and my BFF.

However, I am much more comfortable with myself now, I'm not ashamed and I don't care what others have to say. If they don't like it, too bad.

I announced it on Facebook the day I booked my surgery. My in-laws are a little annoying, but only because they care and they are concerned. But they were more concerned with Mexico than the surgery part.

My reasoning is, it's not so much that I might inspire someone else who needs it, but maybe I'll make the skinny's out there who don't understand & see me lose weight and think its easy, so why can't "X" do it? KWIM?

It seems like most people without weight problems just don't understand why we can't just lose the weight easily. Less in + more out = weigh less. But that's just a small piece of the puzzle.

Help!!! I only told a handful of people..not my mother or family..does this make me a horrible person?? like many out there..I don't want to hear their 2 cents or the comments such as "oh you took the easy way out" "why not just eat less and excersice" ... I don't want to be looked as a liar because I'm Not!! I just don't want to share the information..it's killing me not telling my mom..we share everything ..but she also worries so much..help!

I have told obviously my hubby' date=' my mum, my brother & about 6 friends so far. I have just been telling friends as it comes up.

Part of me wants to tell everyone on facebook. But then I worry what people will think, or if they will be watching all the time to see how much weight I lose.[/quote']

I've found that there will be people who will judge the fact that you are slicing off 80% of your stomach! after all I was one of them,(shamefully) my best friend had it done and I judged her, but I of all people should've understood why she did it, and now I'm in the process of getting sleeved I envy her cos she looks FANTASTIC, so I have had people judge me even my fellow Christians, I believe God created surgeons and had them come up with this WLS so people like us would not be stuck in our homes hiding because people look at us in disgust, so who CARES what people think, as long as you and your loved ones are content and happy with your decision, God wants us to be free and happy, not bound up and depressed , all the BEST

Sleeve-a-licious, I finally told my mom. Simply because I didn't want her to be pissed with my husband if she happened to find out. She took it rather well and is even helping get my proteins together. She's not really happy with my decision, but she understands and is doing everything that she can to help me. I'm glad that I told her.

I told only my husband and his mother and my brother to begin with. When I mentioned wanting to get it done before Christmas, everyone just looked at me and basically said I was stupid. In the past month, I've lost 40 lbs and everyone is saying how HOT I look. So decided to tell them... Remember when you judged me for wanting to do it? I did it. Now look at me.

Wow, this is what im dealing with. So far Ive only told 2 friends and I think they havent shared. I told 2 coworkers, out of those 2 I found out 6 people found out from the one of that persons before I left. Those 6 people were judgemental and came to ask me why at my cubicle without thinking it was a private thing, if I never told them that means dont talk about out in the open. As for my immediate family (parents & sibling) I didnt tell them until 1 month before surgery. (6 month process through ***) I felt like I wanted to make sure I wanted to do it, before I had them judge me, support me, or dissagree with me. mom and siblings support me, but my father does not, even after surgery. As for the people im scared of the most telling is my extended family. Today, this Sunday going to a Mexican family picnic. They will see ive lost another 20 pds, from the last time ive seen them since may 1st. They will see my eating habit have changed. Im currently in soft protein foods. Im not ready to share, my mom keeps pushing me to say something, since its difficult for her not to share. Oh forgot to say my father went to visit my grandma and aunt the day after the surgery and seen my father quiet and they knew something was up. So they came visit our home and they saw me home in pain, that I had to tell them. So I know for a fact the word got around, even though I warned them that day, not to share only when im ready. Im not ready. So we will see how it goes today.

Thanks everyone for your perspectives. This is so awesome to have such a resource. So I've been thinking a lot about this too. I just finished a great book called "A Sleeved Life" by Pennie Nicola (available from amazon and it's just $2.99 for the ebook) and one of the chapters was about this very question. She obviously wrote a book so is fairly open about the surgery but that was after lots of concerns too. She had some great responses to the judgmental statements and one in particular was the 'this is the easy way out' comment. To those folks she simply shares that this was the effective and efficient way to lose weight-and you should be proud, not ashamed to do things efficiently and effectively.

I had the lap band 9 years ago. Obviously, I was not working with the band and had some real troubles. In particular, sliming, getting stuck regurgitating all the time. It mabred dining with people very awkward. I kept the band secret (except to my family and close friends) and I think it was mostly because I had been relatively unsuccessful in my weight loss journey-I was ashamed that I wasn't the type of loser that I hoped to be. I am sure people thought I was a freak as I would go to the bathroom 2-5 times over the course of a meal.

As the lbs go away for the next year, I intend to respond truthfully to anyone who asks how I lost all that weight. I am getting too old to give a rat's butt what people think about me.

Btw/ highly recommend the book!

I took a risk told a friend about my decision to get weight loss surgery. Before I could even finished she smiled and nodded and said she knew a friend who had it done. She said it changed her friends life and her friend looks fabulous.

I had my surgery May 17th and told my 2 grown daughters, my husband and about 6 of my closest friends (4 of them being my coworkers)...I didn't tell my mom, dad, sister, Or in-laws cause I didn't want them to worry and I didn't tell the remaining 20+ coworkers or boss cause #1, its not their business and #2 cause I didn't want to hear any of the negative comments from them like they stated about my coworker that had it done 2 weeks before me!! I know they will know I had "something", but doesn't mean I have to confirm any of it!! For all they can assume, I had a hysterectomy and bladder suspension.....just happened to start dieting and exercising on my 5 weeks off of work!!! I'm sure eventually I will tell them, but gonna make them assume, beg and wonder about it for quite a while first!!! :-)

My husband is the only person who knows. Not everybody keeps it secret because they are "ashamed" or "uncomfortable" with their decision. I am just a very private person. I am pretty introverted and don't really hang out with people. I have a few close friends, and I might tell them after the surgery. I have always kept all of my dieting attempts to myself because I don't think people need to know about something so personal to me. Nobody at my work will know about my appointment except for my boss and all she needs to know is that it is an abdominal surgery that is keeping me off work for a week or two.

My husband is a RN and is very supportive of my decision to get the surgery and will be taking the time off to take care of me while I heal. I am grateful to have such a great, caring person in my life. He is the only support that I need right now. Maybe that will change after the surgery, but right now he is the only one who needs to know. You, know, besides you guys...lol...

I was just sleeved may 17th so i haven't had much time. The only people that i wanted there were my mother and uncle. I dont get along well with my family so they weren't included. At this point i dont want to tell anyone, just not ready. I wouldnt suggest keeping it a secret from absolutely everyone but open up ONLY when your ready! For the people that i dont feel comfortable telling i plan on saying my weight loss is due to diet and exercise, which is true. Hope that helps love. [=

I told my immediate family and a couple close friends. I don't hide it tho and don't expect others to either. If someone asks how I am loosing all the weight I will tell them. Most ppl are jealous.