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update:

I HAVE JOINED OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS. I GOT TO THE HOME PAGE FOR MY ZONE AND READ THIS: (DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR OR WHAT!!)

Knowing and Connecting

Here is a story worth repeating! When I went to my first OA meeting in February 1989, I was a broken man - emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I knew I had a problem with food, but I was unable (or unwilling?) to make the connection between my problems with food and the unmanageability of my life. What I knew then was that I gained and lost huge amounts of weight through binge eating that would last weeks and months, followed by weeks and months of exercising to exhaustion and controlled starvation regimens (sometimes under medical supervision). A 50 pound weight gain for me was easy and frequent, as was the 50 pound weight loss, albeit a little less easy. Over time, the gains got bigger and the losses got smaller and I settled into a 240 pound level on my small frame (I had been as low as 130 pounds!). So I was fat and desperate.

I had heard about OA from a therapist who I did not like (probably because he was telling me the truth, truth I was an addict). I went to a meeting, eventually recognized that although my addiction was to food and the physical manifestation of this was rapid weight gain and weight loss, there were many more serious consequences than weight gain and weight loss. I was an addict and an addicts life is always out of control and unmanageable. This was the beginning of a profound awareness and with abstinence has come many years of physical, emotional, and spiritual recovery.

-- Anonymous

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Lap Dancer - I think it is wonderful that you are getting support emotionally for this journey. I can't imagine that I could truly change my lifestyle and eating habits without that tool. Today I bitched about not loving my band and missing some favorite foods. You know everything doesn't have to be yippee for it to be ok. I am open to feeling all my feelings and sometimes it stinks.

Woofay and Mal - i will see you at Red Robin at 7 pm on Thursday. No one else has responded to our invite. Maybe next month.

Hugs all,

Michelle

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I'm so proud of both of you. It takes a whole lot to realize that something like that is going on. (addiction) It takes even more to do something about it. You gals are so going in the right direction and are completely altering your futures. Isn't that the neatest thing?

I can't eat anything tonight. My body sure reacts to a fill. I'm the one that needs to do liquids and mushies for 24 hours after! I've already urped too. Whatever! What a great opportunity to learn more about ourselves and our bodies! (not the urp part sillies! :))

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Morning gals and guys!

Lap~really good advice...doing something for yourself everyday and journaling. I started to journal a few times, but I just can't keep up with it. I know you will do well with it. Therapy will be my next move (I have ben saying that forever, but it will).

Dynamo & Woofay~ see ya tomorrow night! Woofay I hope your fill is treating you well today. I have to wait for another week for my second fill and boy do I need it!

Marcy~hope you are doing well too...your fill is Aug 16th right?

Shesha~how's your fill working?

Have a bandtastic day!!!!

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My fill is working well! I've lost another pound! Thank you for asking!:whoo:

Shesha~how's your fill working?

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My fill is working well! I've lost another pound! Thank you for asking!:whoo:

Great news, Shesha. Losing one pound at a time is all you can do.

My latest fill is working pretty well so far. Last night I spent two hours at an office hors d'oeuvres party with a major golf ball in my throat for the whole time. The first bite got stuck, and that was the end of that. :)

So, I know I do have restriction. But, I did not even mind the golf ball. I'm just glad to have the restriction.

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Thanks Mark!

That happened to me. I was at an IT User's Conference and they had this awesome welcome reception. Well, I just had to try a piece of sushi and well, that was it! Golf Ball!! I excused myself for the evening and went back to my room. Only all these other drunkards from the party got on the elevator, and we had to stop at EVERY floor!! I almost died!! It took everything I had not to PB on everyone! YUCK!

Great news, Shesha. Losing one pound at a time is all you can do.

My latest fill is working pretty well so far. Last night I spent two hours at an office hors d'oeuvres party with a major golf ball in my throat for the whole time. The first bite got stuck, and that was the end of that. :)

So, I know I do have restriction. But, I did not even mind the golf ball. I'm just glad to have the restriction.

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I just realized I am 1/2 way to "one-derland" 33 lbs lost, 32 to go! (plus another 40, but will worry about that when the time comes!)

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Shesha - you are doing so well! You rock!

Remember Red Robin - August 9th - that is tomorrow! at 7 pm, Arapahoe and I25 (just west of the interchange).

See ya Woofay and Mal - for sure!

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It's THURSDAY!!!

Everyone enjoy Red Robin and take LOADS OF PICTURES!!!!

An102.gif

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Have fun tonight at Red Robin, ladies!

I am so inspired by all of you who are doing whatever is necessary to get healthy. I luv seeing all those weight tickers moving to the right in your signatures. You all casually say..... well, I've lost 25, 30, 40 .... I am so like HELL YEAH!! you have just dropped a toddler from your body!!! YEAH BABY!!!:clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2: Ya'll are DOING IT!! You rock AND roll!

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Morning Peeps!

It is so nice to hear from Shesha and Mark nice to know your still around and have info to share, even if it is about BP's! Good job you two you are doing great, any advice for us??

Dynamo & Woofay~see ya tonight! You two probably won't be able to eat much and I have been eating too much!!! I am supposed to take my picture today for my "during", "work in progress" pics. I feel every bite I ate last night!!!

Lap~we sure will miss you tonight! Please tell, what did you do for yourself yesterday?? That is harder than I thought it would be...I did nothing for myself....I did listen to a motivational CD, does that count? Congrats on the new school clothes, fun, fun, fun! I just gave away some new clothes that I just bought and they are too big!!! I love it! I don't remember a time when I owned clothes that were too big??? Too big was never a problem, so I truly enjoyed giving them away. I started to draw again and I would like to share with you my drawing (warning...it is emotionally dark). Can I e-mail it to you? I want your honest opinion...or do I??? LOL. You are the reason I started to draw again and this is the first one, so I just wanted to share.

Beauty Day for all!!!

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Morning Peeps!

It is so nice to hear from Shesha and Mark nice to know your still around and have info to share, even if it is about BP's! Good job you two you are doing great, any advice for us??

Dynamo & Woofay~see ya tonight! You two probably won't be able to eat much and I have been eating too much!!! I am supposed to take my picture today for my "during", "work in progress" pics. I feel every bite I ate last night!!!

Lap~we sure will miss you tonight! Please tell, what did you do for yourself yesterday?? That is harder than I thought it would be...I did nothing for myself....I did listen to a motivational CD, does that count? Congrats on the new school clothes, fun, fun, fun! I just gave away some new clothes that I just bought and they are too big!!! I love it! I don't remember a time when I owned clothes that were too big??? Too big was never a problem, so I truly enjoyed giving them away. I started to draw again and I would like to share with you my drawing (warning...it is emotionally dark). Can I e-mail it to you? I want your honest opinion...or do I??? LOL. You are the reason I started to draw again and this is the first one, so I just wanted to share.

Beauty Day for all!!!

Hello Friends and happy Thursday. Mal thank you for remembering the goal of doing something special for myself today. Thanks also for asking.

I have already done my special thing for the day. Yesterday's treat was shopping for 3X clothes at Lane Bryant. I was into a 4X and 5X. I bought a periwinkle colored bra and a cafe mocha colored one. Today I went back and bought the lovely tunic I saw and fell in love with yesterday. I bought a pair of hoop earrings and a scarf (a new look this season). Right now I am wearing the headband/silk scarf with my hoop earrings, a fetching style I have admired since the 70's. I wrote in my journal, I got up extra early to enjoy talking with my son and drinking my BOOST. I took time to read positive affirmations that I am thinner, I am beautiful, I am big but I still am worthy of being loved and respected!

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An OA thought for the day I will share with you all:

BEFORE YOU TAKE THAT FIRST COMPULSIVE……. REMEMBER

Your commitment to abstinence from compulsive overeating is the most important thing in your life without exception! You may believe other things may come first, but if you do not abstain from compulsive overeating and practice moderation at meals, you may destroy your chances of finding health, happiness, self understanding and peace of mind. If you are convinced that everything in life depends upon your practice of abstinence, you almost certainly will achieve these goals. If you are confronted with the urge to eat, consider the following points before you take that first compulsive bite.

  1. <LI class=body>Cultivate continued acceptance of the fact that your choice is between unhappy eating binges and doing without just one small compulsive bite. <LI class=body>Remember, each time you face a situation without compulsively over eating will make it easier for you the next time. <LI class=body>Don't permit yourself to think a bite or two would make a bad situation better.
  2. Remind yourself “one bite will make it worse-one bite may lead to a binge.”

Read the OA flyer “BEFORE YOU TAKE THAT FIRST COMPULSIVE BITE, REMEMBER…” for more good information on staying away from that first bite.

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Mal! Good morning! And yes, listening to a motivational cds counts towards doing something for yourself! And you know what else counts? DRAWING! It is so kewl that you are doing this again. Bring it tonight, okay? I want to see too! Drawing is very therapeutic. Especially since you were drawing "dark" things. You are expressing all that is in you, putting it on paper. Looking at it. Perfecting it. Altering it. Contemplating it. You are dealing with it just as you would with a therapist! All I can say is congratulations!

I was never very artistic in the sense of drawing or painting. My mom is very good at oil painting. She tried to get me into it, but I just didn't seem to get anything out of it. Some of it looked okay, but I didn't get the emotional sense of well being out of it that my mom did.

My outlet is music. I play piano and started when I was quite young. I was picked on pretty badly in grade school (the fat kid) and only had a few friends. I seem to express all of that hurt or whatever you want to call it, through my playing. I also like to write. I can write up a storm in my journals. I guess that's why I seem to post more than my fair share of posts on here! Lol! Its my therapy!

Just like you, Mal and Lap Dancer, I've kinda felt like I need to express myself as of late. This band thing and weightloss has pulled that out, I guess. I've spent years trying to ignore just how big I've gotten. So I actually broke out some of my sheet music again. And I've figured out that my piano needs about 500 bucks of work on it. The move and the extremely dry weather up here has taken its toll on it. Rats. Think I will do it anyways. I could use the therapy! I used to have a piano in every room. I had to let go of some of them when I moved up here. Sounds weird, but it was kinda emotional. I'm down to two. But only one fits in my house. Eeek! :omg:

Well, I do believe this post has more than rambled on. Can't wait to see you tonight, Mal and Dynamo! Lap Dancer, wish you were coming so badly. Everyone one else is welcome too!

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