The unspoken rule

[MandoGetsSleeved 435]

Well hell, I'll weigh in on this one! Sleeved in August - Had my first drink in September (birthday) - Only a single drink and no issues and didn't have anything else until vacation in February - I was SUPER excited that I could actually drink a whole beer. Again, no issues, just feeling a bit bloated after one so that was a good thing.

Fast forward.... 2 years - I could drink like I used to. Mixed drinks like Martini's with no carbonation - like it's Water. Fizzy drinks like beer or white claws - a little slower, but I can keep pace pretty well. What HAS happened now though, I don't get that happy buzz. I go from "just fine" to "OMG, I'm hammered" at some point during the day with no in between. It's a VERY delicate balance to make sure I stay in the "just fine" category as I've found that when I hit the "OMG, I'm hammered" stage, I don't remember things the next day. Fortunately, I'm apparently a very happy drunk that doesn't do stupid things... but still - I hate that I can't hold it like I used to.

[AmberFL 453]

Okay so how do you guys feel about soda Water? when I was trying to cut down I was drinking Voda/soda water with a lime...I havent had anything bubbly since surgery

[FifiLux 213]

1 hour ago, AmberFL said:

Okay so how do you guys feel about soda Water? when I was trying to cut down I was drinking Voda/soda Water with a lime...I havent had anything bubbly since surgery

I don't like soda water but years ago I used to drink vodka and coke zero, then I figured the coke was ruining the vodka so I switched to lemon vodka with water or regular vodka with lemon water so I think I may try that again soon. I have a bottle of lemon vodka in the freezer waiting for when I am in maintenance mode.

I know it is not recommended anyway but my own rule will be to stay away from anything bubbly/carbonated. I have to set myself some ground rules as pre-op I would drink a lot and built up a good tolerance which was bad in that it meant I drank too much too regularly so just like with my food I am going to need rules with my drinking.

[ms.sss 15,076]

2 hours ago, AmberFL said:

Okay so how do you guys feel about soda Water? when I was trying to cut down I was drinking Voda/soda Water with a lime...I havent had anything bubbly since surgery

i started using soda water with my vodka and/or gin when i found out that tonic water had as much (if not more!) calories than a regular coke.

as for bubbly, i started drinking it (i.e., perrier) instead of plain water to meet my water goals around 3-4 months post op.

the literature i received told me i shouldn't drink carbonated beverages, but i did anyway and when i told my NUT what i was doing she didn't have any objections since i experienced no adverse effects.

personally i like how carbonated drinks make me burp, cuz sometimes i need a little help to release some gas.

but that's just me. ymmv.

[AmberFL 453]

50 minutes ago, ms.sss said:

i started using soda Water with my vodka and/or gin when i found out that tonic water had as much (if not more!) calories than a regular coke.

as for bubbly, i started drinking it (i.e., perrier) instead of plain water to meet my water goals around 3-4 months post op.

the literature i received told me i shouldn't drink carbonated beverages, but i did anyway and when i told my NUT what i was doing she didn't have any objections since i experienced no adverse effects.

personally i like how carbonated drinks make me burp, cuz sometimes i need a little help to release some gas.

but that's just me. ymmv.

I miss a good soda water lol My husband has a work party coming in June as they do one in June and December every year and its always at a Bar. Even though its a couple of months away I will be 6months post op but I want to pre-plan because I am a little psychotic LOL but I like the soda water and vodka. I can babysit that for awhile but will probably try a drink before I put myself into a social event so I see how I am effected

[jparadigm 10]

WOW! I'm thrilled to see the feedback on this topic. It's comforting to know others journeys, especially on this topic. Fireball is my drink of choice...I know, lol. But it's just been my PIC for years now.....also Budweiser. But I know now after surgery that I won't be able to tolerate a bud and also holy crap calories. I figured I'll wait until summer to try a beer with everyone. I won't lie, I have had some fireball already and been just fine. I didn't experience a difference compared to before surgery...However, I noticed my "buzz" didn't last very long as i felt sobered up quickly before bed. Either way, I don't want to give up drinking...therefor I won't force myself to because hell, that's just another hurtle. I'm going to enjoy this process and if drinking weeds itself out of my life, then that's fine too.

Thank you all so much for giving input!

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,306]

Not judging at all, but how do you guys tolerate the taste and smell of alcohol? I don't get the joy in it, the joy in being buzzed, in daily drinking. Like...why? Again, not slamming your choices, but how did you get to the point where it was enjoyable enough to do it often?

I drank 3x as a teen and absolutely despised it (did it because I was at parties and was trying to fit it). Then as an adult, I figured I'd willingly give it another try, to see if my opinion changed at all. It did. I hated it even more. Never touched the stuff again.

I read through this thread, and honestly, I don't understand why you guys like drinking so much and why some refuse to give it (and the calories) up after the surgery. How did you get to the point that you liked drinking that much? Just the smell of alcohol is enough to make me leave.

[The Greater Fool 1,992]

40 minutes ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

Not judging at all, but how do you guys tolerate the taste and smell of alcohol? I don't get the joy in it, the joy in being buzzed, in daily drinking. Like...why? Again, not slamming your choices, but how did you get to the point where it was enjoyable enough to do it often?

I drank 3x as a teen and absolutely despised it (did it because I was at parties and was trying to fit it). Then as an adult, I figured I'd willingly give it another try, to see if my opinion changed at all. It did. I hated it even more. Never touched the stuff again.

I read through this thread, and honestly, I don't understand why you guys like drinking so much and why some refuse to give it (and the calories) up after the surgery. How did you get to the point that you liked drinking that much? Just the smell of alcohol is enough to make me leave.

Why don't you like all the foods and drinks I like? I can't see how you don't like something I find so enjoyable.

Different strokes for different folks.

Good luck,

Tek

[kwas 9]

I gave up beer and i drink vodka in Water and add crystal light. I only get the 100 calories from the vodka. However, you instant catch a buss and you can get drunk fast. Be cautious.

[FifiLux 213]

2 hours ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

Not judging at all, but how do you guys tolerate the taste and smell of alcohol? I don't get the joy in it, the joy in being buzzed, in daily drinking. Like...why? Again, not slamming your choices, but how did you get to the point where it was enjoyable enough to do it often?

I drank 3x as a teen and absolutely despised it (did it because I was at parties and was trying to fit it). Then as an adult, I figured I'd willingly give it another try, to see if my opinion changed at all. It did. I hated it even more. Never touched the stuff again.

I read through this thread, and honestly, I don't understand why you guys like drinking so much and why some refuse to give it (and the calories) up after the surgery. How did you get to the point that you liked drinking that much? Just the smell of alcohol is enough to make me leave.

I hope I don't come across as rude when I write this but everyone has different likes or dislikes and you clearly say you have never liked alcohol from the outset so good for you but the post does come across as judgmental. If someone likes to have a drink it is up to them as adults to do as they wish, be it too many calories etc. It is everyone's choice to make if they would like to have a drink (alcoholic or non-alcoholic) and deal with the consequences, if there are any like weight gain, reflux, dumping etc.

Do you like eggs? I don't like the smell or taste of them so why do you eat them? Just making the point!

Edited April 13 by FifiLux

[ms.sss 15,076]

4 hours ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

Not judging at all, but how do you guys tolerate the taste and smell of alcohol? I don't get the joy in it, the joy in being buzzed, in daily drinking. Like...why? Again, not slamming your choices, but how did you get to the point where it was enjoyable enough to do it often?

I drank 3x as a teen and absolutely despised it (did it because I was at parties and was trying to fit it). Then as an adult, I figured I'd willingly give it another try, to see if my opinion changed at all. It did. I hated it even more. Never touched the stuff again.

I read through this thread, and honestly, I don't understand why you guys like drinking so much and why some refuse to give it (and the calories) up after the surgery. How did you get to the point that you liked drinking that much? Just the smell of alcohol is enough to make me leave.

being on these forums long enough i would assume that one should realize by now that everyone is different. we say/post it multiple times a day, every day.

i don't like weight lifting . it's don't like olives. i don't like talking about my wls.

others don't feel the same way. i get that.

we are all different people getting our own versions of joy. i may not make the same connections to things as you do, and thats cool.

i mean, some people have sex every day while others don't. some people weigh themselves every morning others don't. some people read books while others don't.

why do people drink too much and become alcoholics? alcohol is so gross. this line if thinking is the close sibling to why do people eat too much and get fat? being fat is so gross. to paraphrase you: "but how did you get to the point where <eating> was enjoyable enough to do it often <that u end up being 300 lbs>?"

the incredulity in your post is loud and clear...but really, if u think about it, its not that impossible to understand (especially from the point of view from a person who was morbidly obese)

your intention may be not to sound judgy...but in my very insignificant opinion, you kinda do.

but i mean, you are entitled to say whatever you want. i guess i just wanna ask you to take a pause and reflect on how ur post may or may not have come across.

sorry. 😔

i don't normally weigh in this heavily in anonymous internet chats as i hate confrontation, but this touched a wee nerve for me.

(i may just delete this post after i overthink it to death...we shall see...i have already edited this post a gazillion times in my overthinking, ha.)

Edited April 13 by ms.sss

[Elizabeth21again 17]

On 4/11/2024 at 5:35 PM, ms.sss said:

well...funny how reading about others' drinking frequency seems to make me think i'm not that problematic after all?

i was under the impression that i drank alot...but i guess daily drinking is not that uncommon????

Obesity is common. But I do not feel better about being obese.

I wish I would have known more about the increased potential for addiction before my last surgery. Maybe I would have made different choices. I wish that I had.

For assistance, I found the resources at Smart Recovery helpful. Here a link to their information: https://smartrecovery.org/

Best wishes.

Edited April 13 by Elizabeth21again

[BlondePatriotInCDA 308]

On 4/11/2024 at 10:48 AM, summerseeker said:

I have not had any limits on alcohol drinking or coffee or drinking with straws etc. I think patients in Europe have slacker rules than you American cousins. I tried my first drink at 6 weeks, I had a weak Bloody Mary and it was yummy.

I was born and raised in a pub, had pubs myself and drunk a lot over these years. I could hold my alcohol well. Now one glass of wine has me smashed for about 20 minutes. Last Christmas I went out with a friend and it got a little silly, I had at least 3 glasses and for the first time in my life, I don't remember going home. That scared me. I felt as if I had been spiked.

Wine and cider give me awful GERD, Baileys gives me get the foamies.

Something and lots of soda seems to work best for me. My husband calls me his cheap date, Cheap means different here.

"Something and lots of soda seems to work best for me. My husband calls me his cheap date, Cheap means different here." What's it mean in the UK?

I'm fairly versed in U.K colloquialisms (been to the UK a lot - friends live there) and I'm not aware of a different meaning! I'd love to know. 😁

[Arabesque 6,840]

14 hours ago, SleeveToBypass2023 said:

Not judging at all, but how do you guys tolerate the taste and smell of alcohol? I don't get the joy in it, the joy in being buzzed, in daily drinking. Like...why? Again, not slamming your choices, but how did you get to the point where it was enjoyable enough to do it often?

I drank 3x as a teen and absolutely despised it (did it because I was at parties and was trying to fit it). Then as an adult, I figured I'd willingly give it another try, to see if my opinion changed at all. It did. I hated it even more. Never touched the stuff again.

I read through this thread, and honestly, I don't understand why you guys like drinking so much and why some refuse to give it (and the calories) up after the surgery. How did you get to the point that you liked drinking that much? Just the smell of alcohol is enough to make me leave.

I don’t really understand drinking to excess either. I don’t really understand why people take drugs or smoke either. Logically I realise for some, just like many on this forum did with food, it’s to comfort & soothe. To forget or avoid, at least for a while, the challenges & issues in their lives.

Yes, I drank & still drink after surgery. I don’t enjoy it as much but I was never a big drinker as such - never large amounts. No I’ve never been drunk & only to the edge of tipsy. Personally, I don’t like the potential of losing control of what I’m doing or the situations I’m in (control freak). Also if I did drink more than a couple of glasses, I’d end up with the most hideous hiccups & that would be the end of my night anyway. We’re not a family of big drinkers either so that’s likely an influence too.

I do find enjoyment in the flavours of alcohol much like the flavours & ingredients in an interesting recipe/meal. Can’t stand sweet wines or adding sweet mixers (except tonic & soda Water in Gin 😉) to spirits but that’s the personal taste aspect. Much like I don’t understand people who say they love coffee but add syrups, cream & sweeteners to drink it. I’m more of a purist that way.

I get the drinking, smoking, using & eating to fit in or feel more confident in a situation. I briefly smoked cigars. It was the 90s & I admit I did it to fit in & for attention. I was changing some of my friendship circle & wanted to be accepted. I look back & shake my head but during that time I came to realise a lot about myself & my needs. Like I didn’t need or want to smoke & if those people I was trying to impress didn’t like me for me I didn’t need or want them. Thankfully I only smoked a handful of times over a bout a year. Have no desire to do it again. And came out of the whole experience a stronger person.

I’m not going to judge if someone drinks, smokes or uses. (Or mixes cola with scotch or lemonade with vodka.) They’re adults & it’s their choice. I’ll worry about them for sure & ensure they’re safe & not harming themselves or others.

I might have just added more fuel to the discussion. Sorry @jparadigm, your original post has been hijacked.

[SleeveToBypass2023 2,306]

5 hours ago, Arabesque said:

I don’t really understand drinking to excess either. I don’t really understand why people take drugs or smoke either. Logically I realise for some, just like many on this forum did with food, it’s to comfort & soothe. To forget or avoid, at least for a while, the challenges & issues in their lives.

Yes, I drank & still drink after surgery. I don’t enjoy it as much but I was never a big drinker as such - never large amounts. No I’ve never been drunk & only to the edge of tipsy. Personally, I don’t like the potential of losing control of what I’m doing or the situations I’m in (control freak). Also if I did drink more than a couple of glasses, I’d end up with the most hideous hiccups & that would be the end of my night anyway. We’re not a family of big drinkers either so that’s likely an influence too.

I do find enjoyment in the flavours of alcohol much like the flavours & ingredients in an interesting recipe/meal. Can’t stand sweet wines or adding sweet mixers (except tonic & soda Water in Gin 😉) to spirits but that’s the personal taste aspect. Much like I don’t understand people who say they love coffee but add syrups, cream & sweeteners to drink it. I’m more of a purist that way.

I get the drinking, smoking, using & eating to fit in or feel more confident in a situation. I briefly smoked cigars. It was the 90s & I admit I did it to fit in & for attention. I was changing some of my friendship circle & wanted to be accepted. I look back & shake my head but during that time I came to realise a lot about myself & my needs. Like I didn’t need or want to smoke & if those people I was trying to impress didn’t like me for me I didn’t need or want them. Thankfully I only smoked a handful of times over a bout a year. Have no desire to do it again. And came out of the whole experience a stronger person.

I’m not going to judge if someone drinks, smokes or uses. (Or mixes cola with scotch or lemonade with vodka.) They’re adults & it’s their choice. I’ll worry about them for sure & ensure they’re safe & not harming themselves or others.

I might have just added more fuel to the discussion. Sorry @jparadigm, your original post has been hijacked.

This is more of what I was looking for when I posted my question. I was, in no way, judging anyone for what they do and don't like. Personally, I couldn't get past the taste or smell of alcohol enough to get to the point where I liked it enough to do it everyday, or even every once in a while. What I was more curious about was if it was that way for others of if they liked it right from the beginning.

I know some people in my everyday life that hate the taste but drink it for the effects it gives, and that's more important to them than how it actually tastes. I know some who actually like the taste. And some who don't care either way but drink it in social settings more to fit in than anything else. So I was wondering how those on here that refuse to give it up (or even those that have no real opinion on it but still drink just because) got there. Do they have an addiction to it? Do they just enjoy the taste? Do they not care either way?

I always wonder the same thing about cigarettes. I hate the taste and smell, the idea that if I smoke, others could breathe in the 2nd hand smoke and it could hurt them, how it makes clothes/skin/cars/furniture/breath smell, etc... My mom smoked like a chimney and I never understood it. I'm not judging anyone who smokes, either. I literally just don't understand it.

I have an addiction to food, and I don't know why I turned something that I had a normal relationship with into an addiction that was slowly killing me. I don't know why it took having a major surgery to help me get back in control and on track. But I know food tastes good. Food smells good. There are exceptions, of course, but it's easy to find the good stuff. Since I've never thought of drugs, alcohol, or smoking as the good stuff, I'm always curious how anyone gets started on it to begin with. I know I can't go back to eating the way I did, or refusing to change the way I did things, or else I'll be right back to where I started. But why it took a surgery to get me here? I honestly don't know.

I've been on here long enough that people should know I don't have ill intentions when I ask a question. I have a genuine curiosity, and the only way people learn, is to ask.