So in no way shape for form am I ashamed of my decision but I am a very private person. And if I am totally honest with myself I don't want people judging me for my decision. I have only told my dad (my mother passed away last year) and my husband about my decision to have weight loss surgery. I don't want anyone trying to talk me out of it and say "you can do it on your own" and "don't you think this is a bit extreme." I am making this decision for me and my immediate family. I will be taking a little time off from work but have not told co workers yet anything. I honestly don't know If I want to. I may have to have "emergency surgery" and come back after Thanksgiving break. I failed to mention I am a teacher. What would help my story seem a little more plausible for work?Gaulbladder issues? Kidney stones? Hernia issues? Thank you all in here for the advice and support!

I didn't share because I didn't want the judgement or others opinions

@VSGAnn2014......why shake your head?? Is it ok to lie about anything?? Why lie about it?? If someone asks you and you don't wanna tell them.........tell them it is none of their business........a person is under NO obligation to tell anything to anyone......but why lie?? I guess it about morales,values, and character. I was taught NOT to lie, regardless how big or little it was.

@@Packerfan61964 this is all about supporting each other not judging each other. Instead of calling my morales, values, and character into question words of encouragement not discouragement would have been appreciated. I wish you well on your wls journey!

So now it's a character issue.

S.M.H.

I don't see why others need to be so judgmental..

@vsgcrystalg........I don't remember specifically mentioning YOUR name in a post....or CALLING YOU OUT!!!! I was merely stating MY opinion and MY thoughts about whether or not to tell the truth about whether you had WLS or not. I wasn't intending to TARGET you or anyone else for that matter. My point was simply WHY LIE ABOUT IT?? However, IF you so choose to take it that way....FINE!!! I am NOT one to judge you or anyone else on this website cuz I don't live in a glass house.

For me it was easy. I work in a healthcare/educational setting. I told my immediate supervisors and departmental co workers. Everyone was very supportive. Thankfully i also have hoards of time off!

Although this thread doesn't reflect it so much, having read hundreds and hundreds of posts about this topic on several WLS boards and forums, it seems to me that a disproportionate number of people who are obese / very overweight have set some very different personal boundaries about what are essentially private issues. In short, there is a strong sense among many WLS patients that they don't have the right to withhold information.

There's also considerable confusion (and misunderstanding) about what information WLS patients are obligated to tell employers about the nature of their surgeries or any medical conditions.

In my very personal opinion, unless you are being questioned by federal investigators or have sworn to tell the truth and nothing but the truth in a deposition, hearing or trial, you have no obligation to answer anyone's questions about anything. You have the right to ignore their questions, deflect their attention, or lie to them.

Of course, you may choose to tell anyone anything. But if you share information with others because you think you HAVE to satisfy their curiosity or you just feel guilty about being untransparent or they wormed it out of you, you are the kind of person who's liable to be easily manipulated in numerous circumstances.

Ugh! I love you! Lol

No one in this world is perfect. You may not lie about WLS but you've got flaws. Check with the man in the mirror before you check another.

I am ateacher as well. I did tell the people I worked with. They have been supportive. Several have even been considering it themselves. I did not tell my family. I felt they were going to be angry and not want me to get it. If they ask about my weight I am just going to tell them I am doing supervised medical weight loss.

@vsgcrystalg. I don't see the reason for the judgement and references to moral character and childhood upbringing either. So I'm smh! I'm certainty not judging anyone for being an open book and singing their personal medical business from the mountain tops. DO YOU. As a matter of fact, I TRY on a daily basis, NOT to pass judgement on the decisions and choices people make. Because I'm not without flaws, I'm not always successful. But when I'm being judgemental I'm well aware of it. That's why it's so easy to discern judgemental behavior in someone's words, tone, looks or actions.

I didn't tell anyone at work, I had my surgery in June. It's getting tough now, because everyone is so interested in how I'm losing weight , I work with mainly women. And they can be very catty. I feel bad about "lying". But I'm too far into it to now tell the truth. I didn't want people judging me, and I am a private person too. But it's snowballing now because I'm asked daily how I'm doing it. I just say I've cut my portions way back and I started excerise. -- which is true.

I didn't tell anyone at work, I had my surgery in June. It's getting tough now, because everyone is so interested in how I'm losing weight , I work with mainly women. And they can be very catty. I feel bad about "lying". But I'm too far into it to now tell the truth. I didn't want people judging me, and I am a private person too. But it's snowballing now because I'm asked daily how I'm doing it. I just say I've cut my portions way back and I started excerise. -- which is true.

Stick to your guns! Your privacy is your prerogative! I support you.

I'm the same way. I only to immediante family, my fiance, and bff cause she did it too. My co-workers I just told them I am have gallbladder surgery. Which isn't 100% lying, cause I am having it taken out at the same time as my sleeve. And if they ask why I am losing so much weight I will just say I changed my diet and have been working out really hard.

As for my family, I've told them all exactly what's going on. They're all very supportive, though none of them live nearby.

For most everyone else, I'm not saying anything.

I am a graduate student so I both work and attend school. For that reason, I've had to be a little forthcoming. I just say I'm having surgery. Very few people have tried to pry me for information after I say that. It's rather nice. When they do pry, I say I'm having a surgery that will help combat my symptoms of PCOS, particularly my battle with losing weight. Most of the time, that stops the conversation. I think they 'get' it at that point. I'm not ashamed to have this surgery, but I am pretty private about my health (which is otherwise excellent, but still).

Lots of different ways to handle this and everyone has to deal with it their own way. Nice to see peoples different stories of how they dealt with it. No right or wrong.....