WLS Cover-up Story

[Peggy 53 69]

I only took one week of vacation from work. Counting the weekends I was back to work on post op day 10. Told my coworkers I took a "stay-cation" . I'm almost 6 months post op and I have lost about 65 lbs. I tell people I've lost about 50 lbs. tracking my food on My Fitness Pal. High protein' date=' low carb and 1200 calories a day. Early post op when I went to lunch I had plain yogurt in from of people (dumped half of it out before they sat down!) I'm a nurse in a surgical area and we do lots of bariatric surgeries. I hear how judge mental my co-workers are so I had surgery somewhere else. Nobody's business.[/quote']

I'm also in the medical field and I'm totally hearing that. Talk about being under the microscope! Stick with your story.

[Peggy 53 69]

Thanks for all the great responses and suggestions everyone. I genuinely appreciate all of the great advice. I think I'm going with the hernia repair story. Originally was going with the gallbladder but as someone mentioned' date=' I may end up having gallbladder surgery at some point in the future. Hernia surgery is something that is very believable and something that, in theory, I could get multiple times. Then, I'll explain the weight loss as being due to better eating habits and exercising. Please keep the great ideas and suggestions coming .... Andrew[/quote']

Well the go with the " man-rejuvenation" story.. That will definitely shut people up.....LOL . The hernia story will definitely work...

[mage54 28]

I guess maybe I just don't understand why there needs to be any "story" at all... Personally I have been happy to answer questions that people have had. There was a day I was in a meeting at work right after I had been approved (before the meeting started but most people were already there) a friend of mine had asked me a question wanting more information, this led to several people listening in and eventually asking questions of their own. I told everyone everything I knew about what they would be doing and time off, everything, they were all very receptive and more curious than nosy.

The thing is it got it out of the way and instead of questions down the road about why I am doing certain things, it is usually questions about how the tests are going or asking for updates on how I am doing. I have lived too much of my life in disappointment in my weight and embarrassment about what I look like. For me to not own up to what I am doing and why I am doing it would be incredibly hard since I view this as the best decision I have made in my life about my health. I am not implying that anyone here isn't proud of what they are doing, but I would say don't be afraid to own it.

[Peggy 53 69]

I guess maybe I just don't understand why there needs to be any "story" at all... Personally I have been happy to answer questions that people have had. There was a day I was in a meeting at work right after I had been approved (before the meeting started but most people were already there) a friend of mine had asked me a question wanting more information' date=' this led to several people listening in and eventually asking questions of their own. I told everyone everything I knew about what they would be doing and time off, everything, they were all very receptive and more curious than nosy. The thing is it got it out of the way and instead of questions down the road about why I am doing certain things, it is usually questions about how the tests are going or asking for updates on how I am doing. I have lived too much of my life in disappointment in my weight and embarrassment about what I look like. For me to not own up to what I am doing and why I am doing it would be incredibly hard since I view this as the best decision I have made in my life about my health. I am not implying that anyone here isn't proud of what they are doing, but I would say don't be afraid to own it.[/quote']

I agree with you in principle. However for some, myself included, the emotional pain of being morbidly obese made it too difficult to confess that I was going to have surgery. It was like I was expecting people to say 'well ya, duh, your fat!' Now that I'm several weeks out and people are starting to notice I have no problem with telling my story and educating the naysayers. I usually get a positive response. But before hand, during all of the waiting and hoop jumping, it would just have been difficult. I wasn't lying, I just wasn't telling.

[Andrew0929 1,101]

I guess maybe I just don't understand why there needs to be any "story" at all... Personally I have been happy to answer questions that people have had. There was a day I was in a meeting at work right after I had been approved (before the meeting started but most people were already there) a friend of mine had asked me a question wanting more information, this led to several people listening in and eventually asking questions of their own. I told everyone everything I knew about what they would be doing and time off, everything, they were all very receptive and more curious than nosy.

The thing is it got it out of the way and instead of questions down the road about why I am doing certain things, it is usually questions about how the tests are going or asking for updates on how I am doing. I have lived too much of my life in disappointment in my weight and embarrassment about what I look like. For me to not own up to what I am doing and why I am doing it would be incredibly hard since I view this as the best decision I have made in my life about my health. I am not implying that anyone here isn't proud of what they are doing, but I would say don't be afraid to own it.

I would prefer to be completely open with everyone and may end up going route after surgery. But, 3 months ago after my initial surgeon consult I told one close friend that I was considering WLS. He is someone that continues to struggle with weight loss attempts (mostly unsuccessful). He pleaded with me not to get the surgery, calling daily with alternative ideas. He emailed me links to fad diets and supplements .... When I stopped talking about WLS he stopped all of the unsolitited advice.

He's a close friend and really believes he's looking out for my best interests. But, I just don't want to hear his advice and I know that several people at work would be the same way -- always lots of advice and usually not good advice.

That's the reason why I'm thinking of going with a cover-up story ....

Andrew

[Fit2btied 122]

I told people that NEEDED to know that I was having surgery for whatever reason that it was for "girly" things (truth--I'm a girl). I tell them I am doing a medically supervised high protein/low carb diet (truth)' date=' exercising a lot more (truth), I am measuring/logging everything I eat (truth), and that I cut out a lot of the bad stuff (truth-- my tummy!). I tell the truth about how much I've lost, too.

All that long drawn out subterfuge would make my head spin and quite possibly explode. When someone asks me a personal question that I don't want to answer, or one that is rude, I simply smile as if they are an idiot and respond with, "Now why in the world would you ask someone that?". Shuts 'em up every time.[/quote']

Love it! Lol

[Nesa 51]

When I has my scope done I was told I have a hernia so that's what I've been telling people that I will be having surgery soon because of my hernia. I'm just worried that my doctors papers (when I go on my short term leave) if they have to say gastric sleeve. My family and close friends know about it but my coworkers don't know. I don't have any co morbidly issues that's the only way my insurance will pay for my sleeve so I'm having a sleep apnea test late this month.

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

I am hoping to keep my upcoming WLS a secret from most people. I hate lying but can't tolerate hearing everyone's opinion

Do you think it's believable to I'm having my gallbladder removed? Then when I start losing weight I was going to say I had some complications with the surgery.

That is EXACTLY the excuse I've used to acquaintances where I am currently living (except the complications bit). When my mother arrives in a couple of months? (And I have to be careful here as she knows I already had my GB out in 2005) I shall be saying I have been diagnosed as having GERD and as a consequence; I can't eat bread, no carbonation, no beer, no wine, no fat, no sugar and have to eat small portions.. that kind of thing... which is why I have dropped some weight. :ph34r:

Ta'daaa!

The only fly in the ointment is the fact she's an ex nurse.... and hawk-eyed.... and super-clever... and.. my mother...

[taylokat 180]

That is EXACTLY the excuse I've used to acquaintances where I am currently living (except the complications bit). When my mother arrives in a couple of months? (And I have to be careful here as she knows I already had my GB out in 2005) I shall be saying I have been diagnosed as having GERD and as a consequence; I can't eat bread' date=' no carbonation, no beer, no wine, no fat, no sugar and have to eat small portions.. that kind of thing... which is why I have dropped some weight. <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ph34r.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':ph34r:' /> Ta'daaa! The only fly in the ointment is the fact she's an ex nurse.... and hawk-eyed.... and super-clever... and.. my mother... <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />[/quote']

Your post made me laugh, I like your humor! I work with a group of nurses and they have no clue. It will work out fine.

[Arts137 1,811]

Lipstick lady. Just add "Bless your heart" to the line, "Why would anyone ask that question?"

And remember, if it's a secret it's a secret until to tell ONE other person.

[Peggy 53 69]

I would prefer to be completely open with everyone and may end up going route after surgery. But' date=' 3 months ago after my initial surgeon consult I told one close friend that I was considering WLS. He is someone that continues to struggle with weight loss attempts (mostly unsuccessful). He pleaded with me not to get the surgery, calling daily with alternative ideas. He emailed me links to fad diets and supplements .... When I stopped talking about WLS he stopped all of the unsolitited advice. He's a close friend and really believes he's looking out for my best interests. But, I just don't want to hear his advice and I know that several people at work would be the same way -- always lots of advice and usually not good advice. That's the reason why I'm thinking of going with a cover-up story .... Andrew[/quote']

And that is exactly why I didn't tell my sister cuz like your friend, she needs to lose 100+lbs, she has health issues . She didn't talk to me for almost a month. It's better now. I'm hoping that eventually she will come to her own decision, but in the mean time,I'm downplaying the whole experience

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

Your post made me laugh, I like your humor! I work with a group of nurses and they have no clue. It will work out fine.

Aww, thank you, Taylokat. Sadly, my mother has every clue and the box they came in.... She be a very smart lady. Probably why my father felt so emasculated most of the time! Muahahahaha. His fault for being slow on the uptake and well, male

[Fit2btied 122]

When I has my scope done I was told I have a hernia so that's what I've been telling people that I will be having surgery soon because of my hernia. I'm just worried that my doctors papers (when I go on my short term leave) if they have to say gastric sleeve. My family and close friends know about it but my coworkers don't know. I don't have any co morbidly issues that's the only way my insurance will pay for my sleeve so I'm having a sleep apnea test late this month.

I don't think the paperwork can say exactly what your getting done because of HIPPA.

[Cinco 16]

I am a year out of my WLS and have told no one except my significant other. I have done great with this new tool and have lost 204 lbs in past year. Some of my family members think I had hernia repair and I am letting them. As a retired nurse (58) ...I did not want anyone of my friends in health care field to know cause they are very outspoken with negative comments about the few co-workers that got the band over the years.

I am glad I got the surgery but agree with many of you that it is no ones business but mine. My sister who is significantly over weight does not know and never will as she is the worst critic of WLS I have ever known. I didn't even tell my sister about my double mastectomy until a month after the fact....and she lives in same city as me.

I think whatever a person decides about telling is up to them. I loved the comments about the anal fistula and other surgeries ....and applaud the poster who said " why would you ask someone such a personal question."

[MystiGal 143]

My thing is.... Why do you have to tell anyone anything? I am shocked at the audacity of people these days. Since when is "I have some health issues that need to be taken care of" not good enough? We shouldn't feel like we HAVE to tell anyone ANYTHING or feel like we have to make up a story because we don't want people to know the truth. I personally am ashamed that I let my weight get so out of control that I needed to resort to weight loss surgery. I didn't want anyone to know what I was doing. If people are so rude to keep asking or make you feel like you have to lie about what you are doing, call them out on it!! This is a very personal decision and is no one's business. Tell them you need to have a medical procedure and you aren't comfortable sharing any more information! Your boss doesn't even need to know more than that! That is why there are HIPPA laws, to protect us. I hate that I felt this way when I decided to have surgery & it makes me upset to hear of other people going through the same thing. Screw anyone that doesn't respect your privacy!! You are not obligated to tell anyone!!!