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Bariatric surgery was a big mistake

I'm only adding this post because I hope someone searching gastric bypass sees it. Everyone must make their own decisions about this surgery, but the overwhelming information out there sends the message that gastric bypass is a good thing. Please know that it is not right for everyone and anyone thinking of doing this should take a lot of time to research both the positive and the negatives. Gastric bypass is not the answer to lose weight. It's not realistic and it's not in line with society. If gastric bypass was just a way to eat half of what you normally ate, that would be one thing. I hate that I did this. I'm so mad at myself for listening to everyone else and not listening to myself. Gastric bypass is a bunch of rules and restrictions that make life miserable. You can't drink when you eat, so you have hours a day with no fluids. However you have to still get in 64 oz of water or you get sick and your weight loss slows. It's ridiculously impossible unless you look like a fool carrying a water bottle around all day long! Then there is the vitamins and medication to protect your stomach. I never took a pill before this surgery and now I'm supposed to be taking almost a dozen a day. Who has time for that? Then there are the limits to what you can eat, not just how much. Try going anywhere and it's nearly impossible to find something to eat that you like and want . Nine times out of ten you have to eat something you can eat, not something you want to eat or even like. I'm literally choking down food I hate just because it's the only thing I can have. Again, I have to pack my own food anytime I go somewhere or just not eat all all and I look like an idiot! What forty year old do you know that carries a lunch box around everywhere she goes? I didn’t pack this weekend when I went to my daughters lacrosse tournament and I paid the price because there was not one thing I could eat even though there were six or more vendors and food trucks! We don't have family dinners any more, I sit in another room to spend my twenty minutes eating four lousy spoonfuls, Mother's Day was ruined because for the first time in 21 years we could not go out to breakfast or take my own mother out to dinner. I sat home alone on Memorial Day and skipped the family BBQ all because of this surgery too. I can't be around normal people enjoying normal things because I'm not normal anymore. Just chewing the food for a ridiculous amount of time and waiting twenty minutes to eat four spoonfuls of something makes me look like a fool. People actually stare and waitresses ask if something is wrong. Yes, something is wrong! I’m angry that I was not told that life was ruined by this surgery. I was never told all of the rules, restrictions, or possible side effects. Every appointment I went to was about what questions I had but no information was given. How could I have questions about something I was obviously so poorly informed about. It’s my fault because I did it I’m stuck and my life is ruined. There have to be others out there that feel the same way so I hope they step out and share so people who are thinking about this surgery can see both sides. This surgery is a money maker for surgeons and it’s advertised way to much with a positive slant. Hindsight is 20/20! If I knew then what I know now I would have gone to Weight watchers and a gym and never ever would have done this. This surgery has ruined my life!

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    FluffySaysForkIt!

    First, If your story is real, and you are not a troll, please get help. You are dealing with some deep seated mental health issues that need professional help. Second, if you are a troll,

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    So what I have restrictions, so what people see me with a water bottle and so what there are things I can’t eat anymore.. Trust me, I hit my pizza quota and chocolate quota like 19 years ago.. Weight

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^^^ so true @Hop_Scotch

I've been reading 100s of posts, multiple forums and probably another 100hrs of medical research articles before I decided to go through with this procedure and I'm 3+ months away from surgery and still reading more every day!

Remember Mikeyy, our complaints are only the tip of the iceberg, what lies beneath the water may still be Good Things, we just complain about things we think aren't the ordinary occurrences. We don't think surgery is a terrible thing as much as we have an innate urge to WHINE!
And when your surgery day arrives, we will be still watching and Wish I g you a GOOD JOURNEY!
On 06/23/2019 at 15:37, MFM008 said:

I had mine done in 2016.
I regret it as well. I think i was to old(58) at the time. Not alot of
Weight loss but plenty of side effects. Mainly dumping syndrome. I cant eat rice, Pasta,
Most meat or FISH!
The dumping syndrome is severe taking up to 8 hours or more to pass.
I would not do it again.

First let me say I’m sorry you’re regretting surgery.
Secondly though, I’m completely stumped as to why anyone who has had bypass would think they could ever have things like rice or pasta ever again.

I had to come to terms with forever giving up certain kinds of foods BEFORE I decided on WLS.

So I knew going in that I would forever have to cut my ties to bread or pasta or refined sugars.
But Sheribear I agree, the trade- off was worth it, and this is from someone who was a proficent bread maker. I have accepted it, shoot I even miss my Late Husband at times, but he won't be coming back either. And if his return meant he would be in perpetual pain, I could not be that cruel, even though at times I was tempted to sit him at curbside with a placard saying" Free for the Hauling " at nightfall I would have bring him back inside with a severe case of Sunburn. And in my experience NOTHING complains of pain more than a man, Once mine said when in the midst of an diarrhea attack, " You don't know what this pain is like!" Hey Bozo, you gave me 3 9 pound babies which I pushed out without surgical intervention! Let's just discuss pain levels, okay?" Turned on my heel and left the room before I could say worse. Mama wanted me to be a Lady after all, didn't she?

Went to Mother's Day brunch at my MIL's upscale retirement center and as I had not yet had my surgery - my surgery is on 7/1, but past 15 months have been primarily keto based, I made my usual no carb/low carb choices although I did have a sugar free dessert (sugar free but it had more carbs than I normally take in).

Main point is, I was surverying the usual options noting all the things I could still have at that same time NEXT year on Mother's Day...and also same for a Father's Day lunch we attended at her center - a small bit of ham..maybe...a small bit of slice prime rib..maybe, deviled egg (OH I SURE HOPE SO!), fresh fruit everywhere, a frittata..maybe...point being is there are SO many options at this place every single year that I KNOW (by Mother's Day next year I will be post-op for 10 months. I plan for a while to carry backup protein drink with me to things like this.

Her retirement home is ritzy/costly/etc. but my in-laws had some money and the place is not your usual 'retirement community'. Trust me, this is Definitely a place where if I have to whip out my protein drink...could also bring the mocha Ensure one...I will fit in with SO many ppl as the population is primarily 80 and over although there are several in their 60's and 70's...if you are in the Ft. Worth area and have some money, most ppl happily move to this place when they are ready.

I could probably ask for or borrow an appropriate drink from one of the residents. I've SEEN several of them with high protein shakes. Maybe we can clink our shake containers together and toast each other ;)

If nothing else, I will be there for my MIL even though yes, I'm a Mom too. My Mom is sadly no longer with us after a heart-wrenching 3 year battle with dementia (my Dad is gone as well and my parents were INCREDIBLE people). When anyone complains about having to go visit 'their Mom', and possibly their MIL...trust me when I say, one day that Mother's Day (or flip it for Father's Day) will be SOLELY about you and you will MISS the run-around that happened in trying to get to see all of the other 'Mom's' in your life.

59 minutes ago, Sheribear68 said:

First let me say I’m sorry you’re regretting surgery.
Secondly though, I’m completely stumped as to why anyone who has had bypass would think they could ever have things like rice or Pasta ever again.

I had to come to terms with forever giving up certain kinds of foods BEFORE I decided on WLS.

So I knew going in that I would forever have to cut my ties to bread or pasta or refined sugars.

Right?!? I don't even WANT to put rice/pasta/bread in my mouth. Those were my vices and I don't need them in my life. I can't eat fish, either, and pretty much can only handle turkey as far as meat goes. It's really hit or miss with meat. WHO CARES. Food is fuel, nothing else.

I really think OP is a troll. The things s/he was complaining about are extremely obvious things that anyone having bariatric surgery certainly would know. I can't conceive of her not knowing the limitations. Everyone drinks water, lol. And there is ALWAYS SOMETHING you can eat virtually anywhere. I've never had a problem. I even went to Christmas dinner less than 2 months out from surgery and managed to have some shrimp dip and a few green beans. With my gym supplements, I take about 20 supplements a day and I am more than happy to the rest of my life because I feel a heck of a lot better being 120lbs smaller.

Sniff ?you are very correct, both my parent and parents-in-law are now gone, while I wasn't looking I BECAME the older generation, and when things and Occurances happen in my life or the few remaining family I have, I wish I could share it with them! Ah, if there is a Heaven , as I was taught from childhood, maybe on some level they still do know. But it is not a happy time when only YOU are left to celebrate!???
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I can eat bread, rice and pasta. Sure they’re small amounts but I can eat them with no problem. Just saying gastric bypass does not automatically mean that you can’t eat normal foods. Before the food police jump down my throat I eat mostly protein. I eat the healthiest foods I can, no sugar or sugar substitutes. No chemicals or processed foods . I am losing weight. I just hope anyone reading this who is pre op knows that it’s very individual and no two surgeries are alike

You're really in a bad place and I am absolutely sure you had to go through the psychiatric exam and process before being given the green light for your surgery.
The classes before surgery are always informative so I think what they said just didn't stick with you.
I had the sleeve surgery 3 years ago and do to reflux disease getting worse I am having RNY revision surgery on July 16th.
I don't expect it to be a walk in the park and I know exactly what to expect.
Maybe I look at it differently but I never really ran my day to day life on the food in my life.
I think that you might greatly benefit from seeking help with your mindset.
I am sure that it's affecting your whole family and your quality of life.
Instead of being miserable all the time find an outlet other than food to think about.
Good luck to you

Sorry, this is not accurate. With my insurance, you needed to have a BMI over 40 OR have a BMI over 35 with comorbidities. If you're paying yourself, you may have a lower BMI. I have never heard of the 100 lbs. above your "ideal" weight statistic. Could you please quote your source?
I was told that insurance companies won't approve anyone who isn't 100 lbs overweight for weight loss surgery.
Weight loss seminar for Riverside surgical in Lexington, SC
Well I'm sure they just loved ME, I was twice the size I should have been to be considered Healthy. I was dragging around an NFL linebacker extra on these 70+ year old bones. No w9nder 8 ached and whimpered so much. But now I have lost my faithless NFL guy, down 170 pounds from HW, 120+ since SW on my Day of Days. Right at point Surgeon EXPECTED but I believe I shall stay the course, even if I feel neglected, nobody from there has checked on me in a month or 6 weeks, maybe they're praying I'll die off? Well Flup You guys, the Frustr8 Wagon has not stopped running quite yet, when 8 visit you on August 14th, you have a SURPRISE coming!".I'm already in Onderland, BMI 31+ b7t I was 52 when You Guys first saw me, did it without an encouraging word from all of You, did not care to be told I was crazy by one of your Junior Grade N.P., and I'll be happy to express this "Face To Face", Lived too long, tried too hard to be put down like THAT! Now,you have gotten MY IRISH? UP and this Celtic Maiden is no longer the Wimp you thought! Consult your History Books, , my dear, You Will find out what Fierce Fighters We Were! It might be a business to YOU---To Me IT IS MY VERY LIFE! And I DO NOT take it LIGHTLY!
On 06/24/2019 at 17:29, allies journey said:

I was told that insurance companies won't approve anyone who isn't 100 lbs overweight for weight loss surgery.
Weight loss seminar for Riverside surgical in Lexington, SC
All my insurance company was concerned about was the BMI.
It had to be at or over 40%. If I’d had serious comorbidities, 35% would’ve qualified
1 hour ago, Frustr8 said:

Now,you have gotten MY IRISH? UP and this Celtic Maiden is no longer the Wimp you thought! Consult your History books, , my dear, You Will find out what Fierce Fighters We Were! It might be a business to YOU---To Me IT IS MY VERY LIFE! And I DO NOT take it LIGHTLY!

LOL - Go get 'em Boudica/Boudicca. My eldest named her cat Boudicca and as she took 7 years of Latin and other assorted things, I learned the correct pronunciation too. People spell it differently but I am sure you know who I'm talking about which is why I love the Celtic warrior queen reference. That name, of course, sprang directly into my mind. My eldest is an uber nerd and used to compete in a lot of academic competitions in high school so I have loads of random info in my head (although as I read a lot, I knew of this famous warrior queen quite some time ago).

You show them, girl!!!

Depression, and I believe regret could come from a similar place, is incredibly common after WLS. I hope anyone feeling down considers seeing a therapist and/or psychiatrist with experience with bariatric patients. Feel better and be well.

Chiming in here for anyone else considering surgery that will read this.

The "restrictions" you have after surgery is because you should have a new life perspective and new healthy habits. You should be eating differently for the most part, you should be drinking more water than maybe you weren't used to, you should be taking vitamins. (and multi-vitamins exist, no one should be taking 12 different pills!)

You should be living your life in the best way possible! Eat what you want, do it in moderation, work it off if you can. As with anything in life, nothing major should be entered into without research - that is 100x true when it comes to your health!!

Edited by Ylime

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