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Sheribear68

Gastric Sleeve Patients
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Everything posted by Sheribear68

  1. Sheribear68

    Changes in relationships PO

    Okay, so I’ve got to vent and y’all are my online therapists, don’t ya know? How many of you can point to several relationships that have been changed for the worse by WLS? I’ve got many fans and supporters, but there are a few friends who I swear treat me like I’ve got the plague now. The latest in particular is a friend who lives in the next state. She’s got elderly parents here and comes every few weeks to check on them. Long story short, they just sold their house to live in assisted living and my friend was here a whole week. In the past, she’s come through for Easter, July 4th, and other random visits, yet I never find out about them until it’s too late to get together. This time—knowing it was going to be emotionally rough for her— I offered to help out in any way possible and she said “sure”. Then I proceeded to hear nothing from her about getting together until I finally broke down and texted to see how she was holding up emotionally and did she need me to bring her anything/take her out to dinner/buy her a bottle of wine, etc.... The response was that she was packing up to head home and would be too busy. Now I’m trying not to be paranoid, but before I had WLS, this never happened and I know for a fact that another mutual friend (who is still MO) took her to dinner the other night. My friend is MO and has been for her whole adult life. The only reason she even knows I had WLS was because we met back at the start of March and i confessed why I couldn’t really eat much (I was only 4 weeks PO then) Funnily enough, that’s the last time we’ve seen each other face to face. I’m trying my best to give her the benefit of the doubt, but it’s really getting tough to do that.
  2. Sheribear68

    February 2019 weight loss buds

    Wow guys. These posts really resonate with me: I gained 110 pounds when I was pregnant with my daughter (2nd child) and the abuse I took from their father still haunts me. That’s the baby that changed my whole metabolism and all I got from him was quiet disappoint and criticism In the weight gain and subsequent PPD. By the time she was 3, I found out that their father was having an active affair with one of my coworkers and that basically everything I had been struggling with had been used against me and that the 2 of them were plotting to try to get custody of the kids. They were actually using my new-found Morbid Obesity as a weapon against me to “prove” that I didn’t have the self-control necessary to raise 2 kids under the age of 6 as a single mom. I fought sooooo hard that year and in years after, trying to fix what was “broken” in me only to fail over and over and over again. Thankfully I had enough of a career and enough self-esteem to survive that onslaught and make it through. Those were several tough years where I was reminded painfully over and over that I wasn’t good enough-or desireable enough, smart enough, or like able enough to be considered a “good” parent and I was reminded on a monthly basis that it was going to be a a WAR of 2 vs 1. I somehow persevered and got those kids raised. I spent over 13 years single and afraid to even think about having a life of my own. I survived breast cancer as a single working mom. At that point, my biggest fear was dying before I could finish raising those kids— aged 16 and 12 when I was diagnosed. The kids dad stopped paying child support after our first year divorced and I was afraid to even take him to court bc I didn’t feel worthy enough to raise my kids as a MO single mom in her mid-30s. When I think of the years lost due to my feelings of inferiority, it almost makes me sick. I wasted almost 13 years of my life feeling like a sub-par human and thankfully my current husband saw me— the true me— underneath all of that baggage. He loved me— plus sized and all— in spite of me not loving myself. It took that brave and kind man’s love to realize that I could be so much more than the reality that I was currently living. With his love and respect and complete acceptance, I was able to start this journey that has led to where I am now. Ironically, my ex is a mere shadow of the man he once was— he won’t call or reach out to his kids and I’ve heard that he and that woman live a very small and petty existence where neither of them are fulfilled or even remotely happy. If I were a better person, I would feel pity for them, but I must honestly admit that I do derive some satisfaction from their misery. At the end of the day though, my best revenge is to live my best life as happily as possible, and I plan on doing that every. Single. Day.
  3. I recently read, and can't find, an article about real longevity as it relates to a restricted calorie diet and how the body naturally thrives on calorie restrictions when the diet is based on nutrient density and whole foods mostly plant and Protein based. Lots of talk about reversing chronic disease and inflammation metabolic syndrome and people living into their 90 and 100s and having health and energy using this method. Primarily low calorie and high nutrition density. Dr Joel Furman has some great books about this. Yes, and I forgot to mention that I have intermittent fasting in my toolbox along with my sleeve and I feel like not only does the IF naturally restrict calories,but the other health benefits might greatly contribute to extending life span
  4. Sheribear68

    The Maintenance Thread

    Okay so I want to urge caution and patience here. I too got freaked out a few weeks ago with my continued loss and then I finally realized that should embrace it I mean, I’ve been fighting a war with my body for over 2 decades and I’m sick and tired of it. So for 20+ years I couldn’t lose enough and now I’m gonna stress bc I had WLS and I’m losing “too much??” Nah, instead I’m just gonna relax and see where this ride stops. I talked to my NUT last month and she reassured me that my body won’t let me die, and I just had my 1 year labs done and they are BEAUTIFUL! I have zero deficiencies and personally I feel better than I’ve ever felt before. I now that I’ve spent almost 2 months
  5. 5’7”, female, 51YO, 13 months post VGS. HW: 262 SW: 246 GW: 155 CW: 134-137 MANY of us who are WLS all start in different places and have had different routes getting there. I personally think that the human body is a wonderful and mysteriously frustrating thing. As an adult, spent many years “normal” or slightly “under normal” body weight. It was only when I hit my late 20’s that I became MO. And stayed there for 22 years. When I had WLS, I had to maintain my BMI (which was hovering right at 40) for 8 months so I could stay qualified. I’d love to see insurance companies lower that number to 35, because I could’ve been practicing healthier habits in the months leading up to WLS rather than INTENTIONALLY trying to keep my weight >252. My point here is that I hit a “normal” BMI fairly rapidly-within 8 months of WLS- and I’m now struggling to keep my weight over 135. I feel like most of that was because I had a lower-than-typical SW, and that my body “remembers” being a skinny girl as a teen and young adult and therefore when I got my resetting from WLS, my body adjusted beautifully. I’ve lost >110 pounds from my surgery date, which is way over 100% EBF. I’m not a super-hero, I just happened to be a girl who (mostly) followed what her team recommended, worked out, and did my homework daily,weekly, and monthly to get and stay on track. Honestly it take me getting creative some days and I still struggle trying to get in >1000 calories sometimes bc I refuse to eat crap. Other than dealing with a weird tomato and Kimchi craving right now, I’m not feeling deprived at all.
  6. Sheribear68

    February 2019 weight loss buds

    I’m actually about to do that. The Pilates studio has asked me to do a testimonial and I’ll be doing some of that.
  7. Sheribear68

    The Maintenance Thread

    It means 5 days weekly I’m closely monitoring my calories and macros and practicing intermittent fasting. 2 days a week I relax a bit, let myself have a couple glasses of wine and open my eating window (if I want) to 10-12 hours
  8. Sheribear68

    Daily Menus for Maintenance

    Quick question guys: What is y’all’s typical breakdown of macros? My March goal is to be diligent in getting my macros more in line with where I think I need to be. Right now, this is my breakdown:
  9. Sheribear68

    February 2019 weight loss buds

    Congrats everyone for hitting their 1 year post-op milestones and thanks everyone for sharing your journey. I had a fabulous weekend, and I’m fluctuating between 134-137 right now, which is all I could’ve ever hoped for and more. Included are a couple of pics that a year ago would’ve had me floored to see. Thursday night hubs and I treated ourselves to a thunder game (yes, that’s a glass of white wine and it was my splurge day) and the next is from Sunday when we went to a new park in town. The weather was in the 70’s and I overdressed out of fear of getting out and about and being cold. Lol, need to figure out how to dress for the spring and summer months coming ahead, which will honestly require a new wardrobe.
  10. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    Saturday morning Pilates
  11. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    Everyone looking FAB as always. Tonite I actually got dressed in something that was not work or work out clothes. Hubs and I treated ourselves to a Thunder game. Lol, I haven’t been to one since last April and I had already consigned all of my old Thunder gear and had nothing “official” to wear: Anyway, I came up with this outfit out of my closet, but for sure this weekend I’m buying something for next time.
  12. Sheribear68

    February 2019 weight loss buds

    My team just refuses to give me solid parameters. Like now I’m 135 pounds and their reaction is “meh, don’t panic, your body won’t let you die. Oh yeah, but still don’t consume >40 gm total carbs in a day”. They never would help me set a GW, and they refuse to tell me a recommendation now. My NUT did confirm that they see a lot of people gain back 10-15 pounds in year 2 though. Gonna stay extra vigilant that that doesn’t happen.
  13. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    Oh count me in the zero-Butt club also. I guess I just don’t mind it as much tho. Hubs and I finally getting a date-day. Hitting a couple of museums in town and then will have dinner for two later.
  14. Sheribear68

    Food Before and After Photos

    Yes to all of this! I actually find myself craving the lighter, healthier and VLC food choices more now than ever. I myself don’t make the most perfect choices every day, but I do plan out 4-5 days weekly and even then I don’t get in all my food I’ve planned. I actually find myself eating LESS than planned most days because i still have a “fat brain and eyes”, so what I think I can eat turns out to be more than I can actually eat. The good news about that though is that I’ve got loads of protein, healthy bats and slow-carbs in my diet and those keep me happy and filled up and not at all feeling deprived. Food was definitely synonymous with “love” in my household and that’s a tough one to get over. Lol, knowing fluffy’s family history is cool bc now I know where she got some of those mad cooking skilz from. I was doing good at the age of 25 to make Mac and cheese. 🤣🤣🤣
  15. Sheribear68

    Food Before and After Photos

    I think it’s wonderful that you’re identifying foods that are triggers and then making a plan to conquer those cravings. All of us are in this together and it’s HARD sometimes. We will have each other’s backs and bounce ideas off and learn from ourselves and from each other. For me, meal planning is essential. Without it I find myself wondering around lost and grazing in my own kitchen When I find myself doing that, I can usually recognize the behavior and get out of my own way, but without the planning I’d be lost most days. You got this!!!!!!
  16. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    Ahem, so those of us who are taller might give those a test drive. Just saying’.
  17. Sheribear68

    The Maintenance Thread

    Another weigh in and I’m down to 135.4 Looks like maybe I was in a 2-3 week holding pattern and now my body is still inching down. It’s weird doing 5:2.... I’ll have a couple weeks where I lose/regain the same 2-3 pounds, then I’ll go super low carb for a couple of days and I get a 3-4 pound “whoosh” and then start defending a slightly lower weight and still do the 5:2. It will be interesting to see where my bod decides to “stay put”. Just when I think I’m finally and forever in maintenance, I drop a smidge more weight and we start the cycle over again.
  18. Sheribear68

    Food Before and After Photos

    Honestly I’m not sure if this is the best strategy or not. Going all liquid diet might lead to feeling deprived and making poorer food choices later. Instead, forgive yourself that piece of cake and make a food plan for the next 2 days and stick to it like glue! Also, have an honest convo with yourself on why you’ve pre-determined that you’re going to have cake. Why is it already decided???
  19. I’m not a purist, so I don’t count an ounce of milk, protein shake, or cream. Some people do, so I’m not entirely sure what the right answer is.
  20. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    Omg. Legs to die for! That looks amazing
  21. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    Lol, I bookmarked ALL of her selections. Wonderful choices and I do need to get outside my comfort zone just like you did. It’s a weird mental battle to have a fat girls brain trapped inside a skinny girls body. Eventually I’ll adjust
  22. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    Lol, she totally nailed blue as my favorite color! Love the virtual shopping for all of us!
  23. Sheribear68

    🎈 Pity Party🎈

    Omg, so my husband is generally just the best ever at spoiling me and taking up the slack when work gets crazy, except for when he’s feeling under the weather. Then you would think that the world is ending.
  24. Sheribear68

    OOTD

    These look very nice! Of course, maybe a little sparkle wouldn’t be amiss either
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