Do you have a Treat, what is it, and how often.

[sideeye 1,440]

4 hours ago, Byefat said:

I saw that after I posted. I wish I would have never ever started this thread. 😕 I really feel misunderstood by a few. Thanks for sharing.

You're good, don't worry. And definitely don't take things like tone on a messageboard personally - it's just a side effect of messageboard dynamics when you're dealing with an embedded community on a personally invested topic. Your first conversation is someone else's thirtieth about the same thing, and what they see as brevity or wisdom comes across as harshness or condescension, etc. It's really no one's fault, it's just how this particularly imperfect form of communication gums up.

Even when people really ARE being dicks, just brush it off. There is literally nothing worth fighting about on a messageboard, and usually the fight's actually about face/reputation anyhow, which is hilariously irrelevant on an anonymous/alias-ridden site. Not worth getting exhausted over, just shrug and move on.

[Hop_Scotch 1,626]

4 hours ago, Danny Paul said:

In my mandatory pre op group meeting the nutritionist said something that made a lot of sense later on post op. When you get WLS you can wipe your food choices slate clean. You can now decide what foods you want to introduce into your new food universe. If ice cream or candy contributed to you being obese then you can make the choice of not introduce them back into your food universe. I take that advice to heart and did an inventory of the foods that I can do without and found that candy, ice cream as well as processed foods, fast foods and sugary drinks lead me to be not just obese but morbidly obese. For the sake of my health I can't introduce these things into my new food universe. (Not even in moderation) Not mention that I am a compulsive overeater and these foods will trigger me into eating other bad foods and will eventually get me to eat badly again.

Everyone has their own take on what will make them successful post surgery but for me, I can't introduce these things into my new food universe. I have a hard time enough working on maintaining my weight loss and keeping my health, I don't need to repeat past behaviors that I know will only harm me. Food for thought (Excuse the Pun)

What a wise nutritionist. Something for us all to consider, and I know I will be giving it some deep thought.

[%^& 89]

1 hour ago, 2shea said:

What a wise nutritionist. Something for us all to consider, and I know I will be giving it some deep thought.

I agree 2shea I loved his post and wished there had been a "love" button. I loved that he was nice, too but what he said I had never heard before and will apply that wisdom.

[kaleeshab 38]

Don’t take what everyone is saying to heart. Everyone is different and everyone dosnt have the restraint to eat one piece of anything. I know before hand I would eat an entire bag of chips. Now I buy healthier options and only eat the recommended amount. I know I want to lose weight and to think I won’t have a chip ever again is ridiculous. My nutritionist said moderation and every now and again. I don’t feel deprived and I’m still loosing weight. Keep your head up and good luck. I know if I find another product that I’m iffy about I just message my nutritionist and ask her opinion.

[%^& 89]

13 hours ago, sideeye said:

You're good, don't worry. And definitely don't take things like tone on a messageboard personally - it's just a side effect of messageboard dynamics when you're dealing with an embedded community on a personally invested topic. Your first conversation is someone else's thirtieth about the same thing, and what they see as brevity or wisdom comes across as harshness or condescension, etc. It's really no one's fault, it's just how this particularly imperfect form of communication gums up.

Even when people really ARE being dicks, just brush it off. There is literally nothing worth fighting about on a messageboard, and usually the fight's actually about face/reputation anyhow, which is hilariously irrelevant on an anonymous/alias-ridden site. Not worth getting exhausted over, just shrug and move on.

Still some people are still pretty blatantly snarky and rude, and it of course they have their friends. They do not help anyone. I do not have a friend here.

Thanks for the advice.

[Orchids&Dragons 9,046]

3 hours ago, %^& said:

I do not have a friend here.

But you do have friends here or at least brothers in the trenches. Everyone who takes the time to respond to questions is doing it out of a desire to help the questioner. Clearly, some are more diplomatic than others, but when they respond sharply, they are acting out of fear for you, not out of meanness. Your later posts let us understand that you have a good handle on this, but on the first initial post, people respond with the limited information they have available. And, believe me, we have seen some amazingly scary posts about foods being eaten by people who should still be on liquids. There are some crazies out there. Wishing you the best!

[sideeye 1,440]

6 hours ago, %^& said:

Still some people are still pretty blatantly snarky and rude, and it of course they have their friends. They do not help anyone. I do not have a friend here.

Yep, people can be snarky and rude. And online, even those who don’t intend to come across that way can because text strips tone.

But honestly, it’s very liberating to just ignore negative people. They’re entitled to their opinions, they’re not entitled to your engagement. No one reading the exchange is going to judge you for not getting into it with a detractor, and if they start taking the “oh, too afraid to debate me, hunh?” route they look ridiculous.

As for the friends thing, yes there are cliques and their habit of amplifying each others’ messaging is deceptive in its impact. But it’s another side-effect, not an intentional effort to shout you down (most of the time). And some people don’t understand quite how obnoxious the whole “you’re new and I’m a veteran” thing comes across, no matter how well-intentioned.

Overall you’re getting a crash course in why many people leave this site about 3 months post-op. But if you can shrug off the stings and not engage, it’s endurable and you can continue building relationships with people whose style of communication is more in line with yours.

[%^& 89]

26 minutes ago, sideeye said:

Yep, people can be snarky and rude. And online, even those who don’t intend to come across that way can because text strips tone.

But honestly, it’s very liberating to just ignore negative people. They’re entitled to their opinions, they’re not entitled to your engagement. No one reading the exchange is going to judge you for not getting into it with a detractor, and if they start taking the “oh, too afraid to debate me, hunh?” route they look ridiculous.

As for the friends thing, yes there are cliques and their habit of amplifying each others’ messaging is deceptive in its impact. But it’s another side-effect, not an intentional effort to shout you down (most of the time). And some people don’t understand quite how obnoxious the whole “you’re new and I’m a veteran” thing comes across, no matter how well-intentioned.

Overall you’re getting a crash course in why many people leave this site about 3 months post-op. But if you can shrug off the stings and not engage, it’s endurable and you can continue building relationships with people whose style of communication is more in line with yours.

Thank you, sideeye. Everything you say here is EXACTLY HOW I FEEL. People shouldn't assume I am so stupid and treat me as such. Maybe there are stupid people.. I do not think my post warranted the reactions/lectures. It was just meant to be light hearted and fun. The last thing I need or anyone else for that matter is 50 lectures from the "veterans" and others jumping on the bandwagon all about how my head is not in the game here. It is a hard thing to swallow when I have literally not had ONE BITE of food for 6 WEEKS. Yes, 6 WEEKS. My pre-op was 2 weeks LIQUIDS. No din din like most, 3 meals liquids. Now, I am still on LIQUIDS. I have been FAITHFUL to it. My post was truly innocent and I thank YOU for seeing that. I am an underdog. I ticked off one veteran and she brought her friends back. I see through all that stupid BS. You are 100% CORRECT about why people leave, it SUCKS to be the underdog. A very small, limited amount of chocolate may the thing that keeps me sane, it may not be. It may be the tool that helps me NOT go off the deep end, it might not be. People should really refrain from spanking others. They do not understand the thoughts/intents of others and just jump to their own conclusions. Who has time for it? I have been trying to delete my account and I see that I cannot even if I wanted to. I do not need people to lecture me here. I know why I am here. I have had people mistreat me most of my life, and I assumed this would place might be a little different. And I do not have a friend here but maybe you. So, thank you for speaking some truth here.

[Chevron 49]

I don’t have a treat per se, but am trying to incorporate more tasty foods that I like into my diet (currently minced and mashed stage before normal food stage). One of my problems in my old life was that I felt I needed to eat healthy foods that I didn’t like, instead of ones I do like. Eg I hate apples but used to eat them rather than fruits I genuinely liked but which took more time to prepare (eg slicing up a watermelon). So now I am adding little bits, which are within the dietician’s requirements, to make everyday more nice.

[elcee 3,340]

16 minutes ago, %^& said:

A very small, limited amount of chocolate may the thing that keeps me sane, it may not be. It may be the tool that helps me NOT go off the deep end, it might not be.

This is very true and there have been lots of studies about it.

If we BAN a food it makes it more attractive and we crave it more. If we know that it is allowed ( as a sometimes food) it loses its power.

Having said that though there are some people that cannot stop at 1 bite, once they start they have to eat the whole packet . A bit like an alcoholic that cannot safely have just 1 drink . If this isn't you then I don't see the harm in factoring intreats, so long as you account for them and they don't become a habit.

[BostonWLKC 806]

Hippeas! They’re like Cheetos but made with chick peas . I love the far out fajita flavor and white cheddar. Protein right lol :)

[Beachladee3 74]

I was thinking about having one small Resees PB cup per day, as it brings so much joy and satisfaction. ..psst and when I'm allowed. How about you all? Confessions will be taken here also [emoji3]

I have indulged in Halloween candy n enjoyed....mini piece here n there

Sent from my SM-G965U using BariatricPal mobile app

[Hungryman 42]

I was thinking about having one small Resees PB cup per day, as it brings so much joy and satisfaction. ..psst and when I'm allowed. How about you all? Confessions will be taken here also [emoji3]

I am three months post and I treat myself with a snack size snickers almost every day....I track my food every day and if I can get it in I DO!!!!! just be careful 1 doesn't turn into 21...lol

Sent from my SM-G950U using BariatricPal mobile app

[%^& 89]

@Hungryman, do you use an app for tracking? If so, what app as I need one. I start my first *bite* of *food* Tuesday!!! ::happy dance::

[Sarab0703 3]

Isn’t equating ‘treat’ with food of any type - exactly how we all got here in the first place ?

Haven’t even had my surgery yet. (4/12) but I am personally looking forward to being freed from that mindset. Especially whilst easy to do it in the early months. I am working on a ‘treat plan’ that doesn’t involve food. One that breaks that entire connection and embraces the advantages achieved by losing the weight. Ideas are.. nails done, hair, facial, massage ...clothes shopping, (then as weight reduces) .. country walk with friends, start sailing again, go for a ride without scaring the horse with my weight... There is SO MUCH world out there that’s enjoyable and much much more long lasting treat wise than eating a Reece-cup. (Which let’s face it, last 5 minutes and leaves you with no good feeling afterwards because you want another and can’t have it. ).