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19 hours ago, sillykitty said:

Hugs @FluffyChix ... I know that is not what you were hoping to hear today! 🙁

"she said that 5lbs wouldn't make or break me, but that I needed to give up on the BDG goal, cuz she didn't think it would be healthy for me"

I think what you should keep in mind if your surgeon has your well being as her priority. She doesn't have dysmorphic glasses, or BDG blinders on. She;s as close to unbiased as you can get.

"And what about the 10-15lb rebound that I'm terrified of succumbing to in year 3? *big gulp*"

First, it's not inevitable, anymore than only losing 60-70% excess body weight post WLS is. Second, if you do have a bounce, it will be ok :). You can be perfectly healthy, attractive, active, and feel great at a point or two higher on the BMI scale. I believe there is actually a study or two saying as women age it might be beneficial to be closer to the top end of a healthy BMI.

In my mind the question for you is ... what will you replace your BDG goal with? From everything I know about you, you need a purpose. Your drive is admirable (and a little frightening). There are so many areas you can focus your energy on, so you can be a healthier FC, than you would even be at your BDG weight.

So I'm finally at a point of being able to respond, Kitty. Sorry for the delay--but I was thinking about your points all last night and this morning.

It wasn't entirely out-of-the-blue, though. She's been saying this to me along with my RD since I hit about 145lbs. They wanted me to stop there cuz they said I had a darling figure that looked right on me and that if I went lower I would look drawn and frail. And yet, I just put their advice aside and went on about my merry agenda. Right?

What's messed up (among other things) is that yesterday I was so anxious to see her cuz as usual, I was afraid I "hadn't lost enough" weight or wasn't low enough to "win WLS" and not get a lecture for failing or lack of trying. I was actually worried cuz the scale here was 135.2lbs which was about the same as it was last time in her office. I felt like I should be below 130lbs by now. But my body has resisted and resisted.

So although it wasn't unexpected--no one expects the Spanish Inquisition (ty Monty Python). You know? So I wasn't expecting her gentle finger-wagging from the opposite perspective, nor did I miss the fact that she "casually" asked if I'd like to see their new RD since my old one is now at another hospital where I do my support group. So I have 2 RDs on the case now. :D And of course, I told her, "Sure! When?" LOL.

I know for sure she does see me clearly without bias and always operates from a Best Practices perspective, plus she genuinely cares about her patients!! She's so talented and such a healer!

I know rebound isn't inevitable but part of me is still so fearful of the zombie apocalypse where all the slain pounds lay waiting to leap on me and I revert to my former poor habits and miscreant deeds that got me to the Obesity Ball. I'm that much of a backslider! (potentially)

And yeah, the studies...for sure. Both she and RD1 told me about them that there is no evidence that being midway or lower in your normal zone is healthy for older peeps. It's actually associated with a great all-cause mortality. :( But ugh...you know? I just wanna be thin. And if I die? I want to die thin (not anorexic). Just thin. Messed up. I know...

As to what do I replace the obsession with--I think it's gonna have to be fitness. I really pondered that. I need to build some muscles especially in my arms and legs and core and booty. Well fu*k! IN mah bod! And I'd like to pick my speed up on "ralking" now that I'm actually able to run an entire 5K at one time. Something I never thought would be possible. Even though I pay for it afterward with increased fatigue/pain, it just feels worth it once it's gone.

Thanks for caring and for asking the tough questions that make me think! I really value your opinion and friendship!

(Ironically, I woke up to a new low -- barely -- of 133.2lbs this morning. I ate like a rabid dog last night. So. much. steak and chicken. and salad. and loaded broccoli.)

IMG_4609.thumb.JPG.0c6dee3ba6ff154f25d5338c7c07a1ab.JPG

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On 08/23/2019 at 12:58, FluffyChix said:






So I'm finally at a point of being able to respond, Kitty. Sorry for the delay--but I was thinking about your points all last night and this morning.




It wasn't entirely out-of-the-blue, though. She's been saying this to me along with my RD since I hit about 145lbs. They wanted me to stop there cuz they said I had a darling figure that looked right on me and that if I went lower I would look drawn and frail. And yet, I just put their advice aside and went on about my merry agenda. Right?




What's messed up (among other things) is that yesterday I was so anxious to see her cuz as usual, I was afraid I "hadn't lost enough" weight or wasn't low enough to "win WLS" and not get a lecture for failing or lack of trying. I was actually worried cuz the scale here was 135.2lbs which was about the same as it was last time in her office. I felt like I should be below 130lbs by now. But my body has resisted and resisted.




So although it wasn't unexpected--no one expects the Spanish Inquisition (ty Monty Python). You know? So I wasn't expecting her gentle finger-wagging from the opposite perspective, nor did I miss the fact that she "casually" asked if I'd like to see their new RD since my old one is now at another hospital where I do my support group. So I have 2 RDs on the case now. :D And of course, I told her, "Sure! When?" LOL.




I know for sure she does see me clearly without bias and always operates from a Best Practices perspective, plus she genuinely cares about her patients!! She's so talented and such a healer!




I know rebound isn't inevitable but part of me is still so fearful of the zombie apocalypse where all the slain pounds lay waiting to leap on me and I revert to my former poor habits and miscreant deeds that got me to the Obesity Ball. I'm that much of a backslider! (potentially)




And yeah, the studies...for sure. Both she and RD1 told me about them that there is no evidence that being midway or lower in your normal zone is healthy for older peeps. It's actually associated with a great all-cause mortality. :( But ugh...you know? I just wanna be thin. And if I die? I want to die thin (not anorexic). Just thin. Messed up. I know...




As to what do I replace the obsession with--I think it's gonna have to be fitness. I really pondered that. I need to build some muscles especially in my arms and legs and core and booty. Well fu*k! IN mah bod! And I'd like to pick my speed up on "ralking" now that I'm actually able to run an entire 5K at one time. Something I never thought would be possible. Even though I pay for it afterward with increased fatigue/pain, it just feels worth it once it's gone.




Thanks for caring and for asking the tough questions that make me think! I really value your opinion and friendship!




(Ironically, I woke up to a new low -- barely -- of 133.2lbs this morning. I ate like a rabid dog last night. So. much. steak and chicken. and salad. and loaded broccoli.)




IMG_4609.thumb.JPG.0c6dee3ba6ff154f25d5338c7c07a1ab.JPG






This is amazing stuff right here.

I’m about a year behind you in your journey, but I can so relate to some of these points

As I get closer to goal (which quite frankly is a scary thought at times) I wonder what will become of me.

I know myself well enough to know that I’m never satisfied unless I’m pursuing a goal.
I love your idea of increasing fitness— seems like a good way to keep your weight up, but maybe change your body composition.

Today I worked with a NP that I haven’t seen since about March. He normally works at the clinic across town, but our NP is out on maternity leave and he was filling in.
He was blown away by my new look (he and his wife are both NPs and I’ve worked with them for years and they both knew of my surgery) and told me “congrats” for hitting goal.

I told him I was still 20-25 pounds from goal and he got a confused look on his face and said he thought he rememered me telling him I wanted to weigh in the 150’s.
I think he almost didn’t believe me when I told him I’m 169.

Anyway, it made me start thinking about numbers and overall health.

No way do I want to stick here at 169, but I’m wondering if maybe my 3rd goal of 145 is something I want to do or not.

Guess I’ll try my best to make it to 155 (2nd goal) and see what that feels/looks like and go from there

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20 hours ago, Matt Z said:

Good Day all! I still IF every day! Really don't know how I didn't do this before! It just feels so natural now.

Floating between 185 and 190, still right around 18% body fat. But I can wear a medium shirt and a 33 waist

Had a bunch of challenges, but I'm working through them.

💜💜 Hi Cash!!! 💜💜

CONGRATULATIONS

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9 hours ago, Sheribear68 said:


I know myself well enough to know that I’m never satisfied unless I’m pursuing a goal.

IKR? I think both you and I are part of that sub-set that needs a finite carrot to work toward. :) Obsessed much? ;) LOL!

9 hours ago, Sheribear68 said:


Guess I’ll try my best to make it to 155 (2nd goal) and see what that feels/looks like and go from there

I think this sounds totally reasonable!!! That's kinda why I set Goal 1, 2 and now 3. Cuz I really didn't know where I wanted to end up or even "could" end up. And I knew I had to "ring the bell" on at least 2 of the Goals in order to have wl closure and enter maintenance without feeling a sense of letting myself down and quitting.

I'm glad you got to work with a new NP and he gave you some things to think about! 169lbs at your time frame is AWESOME sauce! I've no doubts you are gonna reach your healthy goals!!!

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And yeah, the studies...for sure. Both she and RD1 told me about them that there is no evidence that being midway or lower in your normal zone is healthy for older peeps. It's actually associated with a great all-cause mortality. :( But ugh...you know? I just wanna be thin. And if I die? I want to die thin (not anorexic). Just thin. Messed up. I know..

FC--I really feel your concerns but please listen to your MD and RDs. You are thin...I can see it and I am sure everyone else does too. A BMI of 23 is a healthy place for you. 130 is just a random number and your body (imho) is telling you that it does not want to go there. How many women at your age and with all your health challenges can rock a size 8 skinny jean. Do you not see how amazing that is because I sure do? You eat a very healthy diet and are getting yourexercise in. I think accepting a range of 130-135 would ease your mind and let you relax and concentrate on being healthy and fit.

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@MIZ60 I'm thinking of your response and pondering--not ignoring! :) ((hugs))

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24 minutes ago, MIZ60 said:

I think accepting a range of 130-135 would ease your mind and let you relax and concentrate on being healthy and fit.

So question for all y'all! Do you think it's cheating then, to adjust my Goal #3 to be 135lbs in my signature line? So that I can look at it and see that "I crossed the finish line"? Or do you think my mind will still automatically go to the place of, "Yeah, but I didn't touch the 130line on Goal #3 and just "gamed" it"?

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No it is not cheating and you are not gaming it. You are beyond your original goal and at a healthy and svelte BMI. You are a ROCK STAR!!

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54 minutes ago, MIZ60 said:

No it is not cheating and you are not gaming it. You are beyond your original goal and at a healthy and svelte BMI. You are a ROCK STAR!!

Definitely not cheating!

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1 hour ago, FluffyChix said:

So question for all y'all! Do you think it's cheating then, to adjust my Goal #3 to be 135lbs in my signature line? So that I can look at it and see that "I crossed the finish line"? Or do you think my mind will still automatically go to the place of, "Yeah, but I didn't touch the 130line on Goal #3 and just "gamed" it"?

I crossed out my original goal of 120 and replaced with 127 in mine....

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Just now, ms.sss said:

I crossed out my original goal of 120 and replaced with 127 in mine....

Oh great idea! Thanks for sharing!! And how did you feel? Did you "feel" like you reached goal in that span of time where you were 120.5-127? :) Of course, at 114, you should/could cross out the 127 and go back to 120. :D

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2 minutes ago, FluffyChix said:

Oh great idea! Thanks for sharing!! And how did you feel? Did you "feel" like you reached goal in that span of time where you were 120.5-127? :) Of course, at 114, you should/could cross out the 127 and go back to 120. :D

Actually the time when I was 120-127 I was all in panic mode about losing too much weight, so it wasn't a very celebratory time :(

I am in a sooooooo much better place now and the number on the scale is not as all-consuming in my mind as it was before. Even though I'm lower now, I cool with it cuz I think I look awesome and more importantly I FEEL awesome (yeah, I know, I'm so full of myself its disgusting 😎...but I'll take it)

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On 08/24/2019 at 10:46, FluffyChix said:






So question for all y'all! Do you think it's cheating then, to adjust my Goal #3 to be 135lbs in my signature line? So that I can look at it and see that "I crossed the finish line"? Or do you think my mind will still automatically go to the place of, "Yeah, but I didn't touch the 130line on Goal #3 and just "gamed" it"?


I don’t see how it could be considered cheating when you really didn’t know for sure where your body would end up most comfortable with.

My goal #1 was to be a size 12/14 and weigh under 175.
Before WLS, this seemed almost unattainable and I never in my wildest dreaming thought my body would allow me to get there.

Well I got there about 1 month ago and I’ve lost an addition 6 pounds beyond.

Sometime in April/May I adjusted my goal to 155 (again, something I wasn’t sure would actually be achieveable) and I’m 14 pounds from that.
I’m thinking there’s a really good chance I can hit that goal, but who knows what maintenance will look like?

Another number that keeps coming to mind is 145, which is goal 3.
145 is a number I’d like to see “just for fun”. Honestly it’s a number that I don’t think I might reach, but I’m going to try. My main reason is I want insurance against a bounce.

If it turns out that 155 is where my body wants to stick and it doesn’t want to get to 145, I know I’ll be able to live with it. After all, this started out as me trying my best to live the rest of my life healthy and happy and find that balance between being a complete badass and relaxing and enjoying life.

Since my all-time HW from 2008 was 272, I like to tell myself I’m already 100+ pounds down, which is pretty freaking amazing.
SW was 246 and by my math, I’ve already lost “about as much as can be expected” from VGS and the rest will be hard work and a bit of luck. We’ve done this math in another thread: at the MOST, I was carrying around 100 pounds excess fat and I’ve already lost 77 pounds, so that puts me right at the top of the range—especially for VGS. Trying to lose all 100 of those excess fat pounds might be unrealistic. Won’t know til I try.

So.... since I have no idea where my body will determine what it’s new set point wants to be, I’m making educated guesses.

So this is my very long-winded way of saying that I can’t consider it “cheating” when you didn’t have all the data points ahead of time

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So question for all y'all! Do you think it's cheating then, to adjust my Goal #3 to be 135lbs in my signature line? So that I can look at it and see that "I crossed the finish line"? Or do you think my mind will still automatically go to the place of, "Yeah, but I didn't touch the 130line on Goal #3 and just "gamed" it"?
No it's not "cheating" because at this point you have exceeded your goal and you look and feel amazing! You are just trying to psychologically catch up to where your body and your physician knows it's just right!! So if changing it helps you mentally, GO FO IT!!![emoji112][emoji112][emoji112][emoji112][emoji122][emoji122][emoji122][emoji122][emoji122]
Give yourself the ability to Celebrate GOAL FluffyChix!!! It was hard earned, long time coming and you GOT there!!!!

Sent from my SM-N960U using BariatricPal mobile app

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