This may be a stupid question...but, after reading over several posts on here and from my hospitals support groups site, I'm seeing a trend. I just want to confirm that I'm not going crazy and that trend is correct. Even though the numbers on the scales go down and our clothes get looser and sizes go down, do we still not really "see" our transformations? I know that for me, since I started this journey in December, I've lost over 80 pounds and I can tell it in my clothes, but to look at myself, I don't see one of my children missing from me...is that just my "fat" eyes?

Its hard to tell a difference sometimes when you see yourself so often, usually others who havent seen you in a bit notice right away.

But photos really really help. They often catch the subtle transitions we miss. Thats why the VETs often recommended taking them at the start of your journey.

And sometimes body dysmorphia comes into play where people don't have an accurate mental/realistic view of themselves at all.

I think it takes time. In the beginning it's hard to see because you have so much fat to lose. Later on your can see and feel the differences more clearly, even if you're losing just a bit more like e. g. seeing the tendons on hands and feet when moving them or feeling certain bone prominences.

I do see it, but again we see ourselves daily so we don't see it as others who do not see us as often. What I did was take pictures, I've done this on every weight loss attempt, but I did start taking pictures every Thursday since my surgery date. When i look back I do see all the work I have put in.

I don't see it unless I see myself in a photo. Then I'm completely shocked. I still feel obese.

This is so hard. I'm almost 3 years out. I've lost 150 pounds. Yet, there are some days, I pull my clothes out of the closet, look at them and go - that can't be mine, it's too small. I consistently go to the wrong size racks in stores. My head says I'm still 300 pounds.

When I see photos - then vs. now type things, I see it. But, when I look in the mirror, I still see the fat girl.

FWIW, I'm an avid athlete now and work out almost daily. I'm ranked in the top 25 of my sport for my age group in the US. I work with a personal trainer and I can deadlift 235 pounds and squat 225. Yet, I still see myself as a size 26 and not a size 6.

The head is the last thing to get on board.

I TOTALLY DO. But it is a mindset. I have celebrated every tiny victory. I waited so long for this and now I don't want to miss a minute of it! I wish so much I had taken a before pic on surgery day!

I have to really look/study myself to see the weight loss. It's easier if I focus on certain areas. For instance, I can see my clavicle. But I don't really "see" it in my face or anywhere else for that matter unless I look at my before pics.

I took a photo a day or 2 before surgery and I take regular photos almost every week. I wish I'd taken one at my highest weight and/or before I really started focusing on the 6 month diet before surgery. Maybe it would have been more apparent to me? I can see the difference when I look at the photos side-by-side.

This sounds weird, but I can "feel" the weight loss even though I can't see it. EX: If I'm laying in bed before I get up in the morning and I brush by my abdomen or rub my shoulder, I can feel my bones closer to the surface and/or feel the smaller size.

I am also in the same boat as Diana_in_philly (above). I go to my closet or dresser and I pick out items to wear. I'm picking out things that are too big because it seems weird to me that I wear that size. I fully expect items that are my size to be too tight/too small.

Funny story that happened to me this weekend: I got my hair cut, really short and really different than I've been wearing for the last 5 years or so. I passed through the bathroom and didn't turn on the light. As I passed the mirror, I did not recognize myself. For that fraction of a second that it took me to realize that person in the mirror was me, panic set in that some stranger was in the bathroom with me!

13 hours ago, S@ssen@ch said:

I have to really look/study myself to see the weight loss. It's easier if I focus on certain areas. For instance, I can see my clavicle. But I don't really "see" it in my face or anywhere else for that matter unless I look at my before pics.

Yep I have met my collarbones! and my knees and my shoulders. lol My butt bones hurt if I sit in a hard chair for a bit lol

I can absolutely see the difference when I look in the mirror.

However, I sometimes forget that I'm no longer enormous when I'm doing every day things. For instance, I still look for wide parking spaces when I no longer need them. And I forget that I can use the ladder to get out of the pool instead of the sloping steps. And the other day, I was teaching an unfamiliar class of children about healthy eating and I said, "You don't want to end up with a big tummy like me!" - and they just looked puzzled. Old habits die hard, eh?

On 3/12/2019 at 2:35 PM, BigDaddy BGP said:

This may be a stupid question...but, after reading over several posts on here and from my hospitals support groups site, I'm seeing a trend. I just want to confirm that I'm not going crazy and that trend is correct. Even though the numbers on the scales go down and our clothes get looser and sizes go down, do we still not really "see" our transformations? I know that for me, since I started this journey in December, I've lost over 80 pounds and I can tell it in my clothes, but to look at myself, I don't see one of my children missing from me...is that just my "fat" eyes?

Just this week I could notice the difference but even then it was only in a specific outfit that I could tell. I was telling my coworkers that my stomach feels bigger then it was before which isn't true it's obviously smaller but it feels and looks bigger to me. It takes us twice as long to see it on ourselves then for other people to see it on us.

57 minutes ago, zombieskayer said:

Just this week I could notice the difference but even then it was only in a specific outfit that I could tell. I was telling my coworkers that my stomach feels bigger then it was before which isn't true it's obviously smaller but it feels and looks bigger to me. It takes us twice as long to see it on ourselves then for other people to see it on us.

I can see my feet now LOL Used to be my boobs were in the way then it was my belly. now the belly AND the boobs are smaller.

9 hours ago, Avery's Mom said:

Yep I have met my collarbones! and my knees and my shoulders. lol My butt bones hurt if I sit in a hard chair for a bit lol

Yes. Wooden church pews now do a number on my butt.

Considering becoming a heathen, oh I really am joking a little bit I do have a problem, wooden pews about kill my rump?, kneeling screws up my 2 knee? ?replacements, maybe I'll stand up and lean against the back wall. Either that or carry an egg crate pillow wherever I go!???

I look in the mirror and dont recognize who I am now-a-days. I know I've lost weight but most times I still feel fat. The body image/body dysmorphia is real.

I miss the old ME
the happy ME
the fun to be around ME
the content to be where I was at ME
the gone ME
Will the new ME I am constructing. be a good enough ME to last me the rest of my Life!????