Has anyone taken this journey alone? Tips?

[NYCNomad 64]

I’ve told 2 friends that I’m having this surgery and they are both supportive but neither live here. My family doesn’t live here either and I haven’t told them because I know they’d be worried. I feel prepared and confident doing this alone with the support of forums like this and FB groups but I questioned that during my pre-op visit yesterday (March 12 surgery) when the nurses seemed concerned that I wouldn’t have anyone to take care of me at home. They are also requesting that someone pick me up from the hospital after surgery. I am single and live alone in NYC, none of my friends have cars (or know that I’m having this surgery), and the hospital is far. I was planning on taking an Uber.

Any tips from people that have done this alone on things I should anticipate? For those that have a partner or help from family/friend...what do they help with that I will have to do alone? Thanks!

[abefroman329 704]

1) The hospital is probably not going to let you take a cab or Uber home by yourself. You will, at minimum, need someone to ride in the cab or Uber with you.

2) You won't really need anyone to take care of you at home, honestly. You definitely won't be up to grocery shopping for the first week or two, but non-perishable food can be purchased before the surgery, and for perishable foods, there's Peapod or Instacart. I was able to cook for myself, make my own shakes, etc.

[briddle 10]

I agree you will definitely need someone with you when you leave the hospital and perhaps to pick up a prescription or two. Get your supplies in beforehand and other than leaving the hospital and maybe picking up a prescription you will be fine.

[logicwand 269]

Yes, hospital will not release you to an uber or taxi driver. I looked into hiring a home care aid for half a day on care.com Not as expensive as you think and they will pick you up. My brother ended up getting me, but I would look at care.com for medical transportation.

I know you know the surgery is going to be tough and being alone possibly tougher. But honestly, I enjoyed recuperating alone and not being around someone constantly.

[frust8 962]

I have a suggestion for you. Do you have a school of nursing in your community? Call them up and ask if they can link you with a student nurse. When I was in LPN school I would have jumped at the chance. It's a win- win situation, he or she gets a chance to practice blooming nursing/caretaking skills, you get a temporary caretaker, if they do well you write a letter of appreciation to the school, it goes on their permanent record and it could help after graduation to secure their first job. If you're an employer and you see they've had practical experience out in the community it will make you want to hire this person for your care team.

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[Zaa 6]

I would also recommend hiring a nurse or home health aide for at least a day or two. I could NOT have survived the first couple days alone. Each person is different but it’s better to be safe than sorry!

[logicwand 269]

I slept a lot when I came home from the hospital. Watching TV helped keep my mind off everything. I just set alarms to remember medication and forced myself to drink as much Water as possible. It wasn’t bad for me at all.

[NYCNomad 64]

This is all very helpful. Thank you! I’m a little concerned about it being a requirement to have someone with me to go home. How is this enforced? Does someone have to sign me out? Can they force me to stay if I don’t have someone?

[jess9395 5,448]

This is all very helpful. Thank you! I’m a little concerned about it being a requirement to have someone with me to go home. How is this enforced? Does someone have to sign me out? Can they force me to stay if I don’t have someone?

The reality is you can always sign out AMA (against medical advice) and Uber home. They can’t stop you. Different hospitals have different procedures but mine didn’t have your ride sign anything. I walked out next to my husband but they didn’t have him sign me out.

If they know you are going home to living alone they won’t release you until they believe you are ready for that. See if your surgeon can give you any prescriptions ahead of time (mine did and I filled them weeks before surgery).

[sillykitty 10,705]

2 minutes ago, NYCNomad said:

This is all very helpful. Thank you! I’m a little concerned about it being a requirement to have someone with me to go home. How is this enforced? Does someone have to sign me out? Can they force me to stay if I don’t have someone?

I'm confused by this too. My mom picked me up, but I seriously considered calling a Lyft. I don't think my hospital would have had an issue with that. We were going through the discharge process before my mom picked me up, and never asked how I was getting home.

I've basically done this alone. I have friends and family nearby, but I just never needed anything. I got my meds a week before my surgery. I stocked the house with Water, Protein Shakes, yogurt etc. If I had needed anything there are plenty of delivery services available. I've been fine and not once have I wished I had some help.

[Marleeng 1]

I’m in the same boat. I have a 7 year old son and idk how he will going to school etc. I’m taking a week off work and hoping everything goes well. I’m nervous 😬 My surgery date is also March 12

[frust8 962]

Scenario: when you're about leave.Tammy(your discharging nurse) I'd like to introduce you to Suzanne Smith. Suzanne is in her second year of RN school and will be assisting me with my journey home. If you and Suzanne have worked that she'll be staying with you, you can mention that. Otherwise you'll make an impression that you've thought this out and are prepared if anything happens. I happen to have an adult son who lives with me and will be my 1st line support person, if I didn't have him I'd be planning something similar. Now you when you leave might be able to whip your weight in Wildcats, i, at my age, will not be able to whip my weight in feathers or fight my way out of a wet paper bag. After all, I'm 72, although age should garner more respect, we have our battles to fight with average society. Bottom line, I wish you a successful surgery and a future life of health and good fortune.

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[BuffaloBill 168]

Yea my hospital didn't release me until I had someone too leave with. But honestly I woulda been fine taking an uber.. just explain to them u don't have anybody in NYC with u. I'm single and I've done everything all by myself. My mom stayed with me my first night home for a couple hours but I was fine and sent her home too sleep in her own bed. I've taken care of myself since being released from the hospital and I've thrived... you'll be fine. Your 7 yr old should help also. I had nobody and I was fine. Good luck, I'm 5 months post oppressively

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[Marleeng 1]

Thank you @BuffaloBill I’m nervous yet excited for the road ahead.

[BuffaloBill 168]

Thank you [mention=301868]BuffaloBill[/mention] I’m nervous yet excited for the road ahead. [emoji4]

Yea I was the same.. everything gets better minute by minute as soon as u open your eyes after surgery...youll be fine taking care of yourself... only advice is give is too really avoid stairs for as long as u can till u feel healed enough to stretch out on them.

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