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Who is choosing to keep surgery a secret?

Kila Rass

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Kila Rass    51

Kila Rass
Posted

I don't plan on telling a soul. Not even my mom except maybe to say I'm going to Mexico for the weekend and to check up on me. Any vets who went the same route? How did you deal with questions? Any pre-op folks deciding to keep it to themselves?

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laceemouse    631

laceemouse
Posted

I think most people keep it a secret. Other people just don't understand. I didn't tell anyone besides my husband and kids before surgery but I have been open about it since then. I am a big mouth though, I don't keep secrets well. Before the surgery I didn't want anyone trying to talk me out of it but now it's too late for that.

After the surgery you can just tell people you are working with a doctor, eating healthy and low carb, which is all true! Then when they notice the weight loss just say thank you.

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Mere228    17

Mere228
Posted

I plan too... I don't need the "just goto the gym" blah blah blah... if it was that easy i wouldn't be here .. people just don't understand ... Good Luck Hun and keep us posted:)9

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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Andrew0929    1,101

Andrew0929
Posted

I've only told 2 close friends and my siblings. I didn't tell my elderly mother as she'd likely object and I didn't want to engage in that argument.

No regrets. I wasn't interested in hearing everyone's opinion and having to justify.

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Wonder WomanNJ    119

Wonder WomanNJ
Posted

I haven't told many people. Only immediate family knows plus one nay sayer. I realized I didn't want to field the "oh you're just going the easy route" comment. That's just ignorance. Besides, I know what I want and what I'm doing and am not looking for approval.

I apologize in advance for negative people who will hurt your feelings. I know what it's like to feel like you are finally doing something good for yourself and being shot down by others.

Best of Luck!!!

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Raymia    565

Raymia
Posted

I just told the ppl close to me no one else needs to know : ) But since this is surgery I had to let the ppl who love me know.

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DJ's Mom    24

DJ's Mom
Posted

I've only told 5 people outside of my mom, who I know will by my support system. 2 of them have had the surgery on the other 2 and my boyfriend have always had my back and support through many things. I was hesitant to tell my mom because she's so against surgeries but she was really supportative. I didn't hear the blah, blah, blah that I thought I would have to hear. She ended up telling my dad and his response was shocking as well as supportative.

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charlies.angel    17

charlies.angel
Posted

I'm new to the forum, but had to share here. My husband is my biggest supporter and I have only told my mom. My mom has had the lap band, so she at least understands. I don't feel like answering to anyone about what I choose to do. I'm a yo-yo with my weight so when I lose, it won't be a surprise to most. Keeping it off will be the surprise

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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littlesuzicreamcheese    11

littlesuzicreamcheese
Posted

Just my husband and children know... Then my daughter told her boyfriend, who told his dad. And, well... now, I'm wishing I would not have told anyone other than my husband. I joined a closed support group on FB, but apparently your "friends" can see what closed groups you belong to... and, I was recently confronted by an estranged friend that I belonged to a VSG support group. If you want to keep it a secret, tell no one. People are so judgmental.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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Ldyvenus    317

Ldyvenus
Posted

Work thinks it's a hiatal hernia. A few family members know the truth. I find it hard to lie, but I'm not really close to anybody at work, and I don't want any judgey stares or whispers.

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Healthy_life2    8,319

Healthy_life2
Posted

@@Kila Rass

I told immediate family and a friend that lives out of state. It's not like I could hide the rapid weight loss.( 6 months to goal) My weight loss became the topic every time people ran into me. Many people have speculated I had surgery.

Being honest. People know. Even when you tell them your eating healthy and exercising.

two and a half years later. Life is normal. No more shock. No more discussing weight loss. People just except this is me now.

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hayleyf3706    150

hayleyf3706
Posted

I'm totally the opposite... I'm telling everyone! I'm so excited, and I want all my friends and family to keep me accountable and cheer me on! Plus, I want to kind of help reduce the stigma around it. I'm even blogging about it!

www.becomingaloserblog.wordpress.com

Not saying my way is the right way... just the route I chose!

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Go To Topic Listing PRE-Operation Weight Loss Surgery Q&A

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    • Aunty Mamo

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      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
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    • BeanitoDiego

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      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
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