First let me start off by saying I'm am a pretty happy and content girl these days. I'm thrilled with my progress thus far. I wouldn't change not even one thing! Not the good, the bad or the ugly (barium swallow test still ranks pretty ugly, I know simple yet traumatizing all the same) but I've noticed there are a few things that just really drive me crazy. Like, my Aunt who has also had WLS (gastric bypass almost 10 yrs ago). She has gained most all of her weight back. She insist that I send her update pictures via FB messenger and raves about how happy she is for me but then turns around and sends me a picture of a fruit pizza she made with the caption "yummy I bet you wish you had some". What the crap is that?! Is it suppose to be funny? Being as I'm a southern Christian woman and she's my aunt I don't elaborate on where she could fit that pie in her nether regions. I just say oh looks good. Puke. Also my lovely family (kids and husband) always make little remarks like "she's not going to be able to eat more that 5 bites" when ever I talk about cooking something or they make bets on how much I'm going to actually eat. Now, when it comes to them I know they aren't doing it in a mean spirited way they are just a bunch of smart a**'s which unfortunately I can't get too mad over because they got it from me. In fact the other night I had a small piece of tiramisu cake left and I heard them whispering about how they would end up with it because " mom won't be able to eat it all" so after a few bites they were right I couldn't so before they could say anything about wanting it I tossed it on the floor for the dog (see where the a** part comes in?) anyway those things are a few of my pet peeves I've acquired over the last 9 months. Anyone else care to elaborate on some of your own?

Just say no to trolls!!

"Let's all learn to say no!"

Amen.

No to our old bad habits. No to well-meaning friends. No to people who are used to us saying yes in the past. No to assholes who want to control or sabotage us.

And as on other topics, no means no.

One of my co workers tried to feed me! I politely said no thank you, but he kept pushing his fork toward me. I changed the subject and moved further away. It seems so odd to make someone feel bad for having with friends, but not eating.

My mother, whose always been pretty thin. She compliments me on my weight loss and then tells me about any weight she has lost and that she's fitting into a size eight. Now granted she's seventy four and it's good that she's an eight,but..

I have two that I don't think have been mentioned yet. When others try to pressure me into drinking alcohol. I am 9 months post op and could have a drink if I wanted to but honestly I don't really enjoy the taste of wine or beer and I am cheap. Which brings me to the next pet peeve of how much food I throw away because I can't eat it fast enough. This could range between veggies and fruit I didn't eat quick enough to left overs because left overs are usually at least 2/3 more meals. Just a few pet peeves Love the thread.

~LA

I've lost 50lbs in 2.5 months. My biggest peeve is when people dont mention it or pretend they didnt notice it.

It's FIFTY effing pounds!! How the hell do you not notice that??

Also my "best friend" who hasnt said a good word about my weight loss at all, but will compliment other people for losing 3 lbs.

Really?

@@Jennna I feel your pain. I have a co-worker who won't say a damn thing about 120 lbs I've lost so far. While everyone is complimenting me, she'll walk out the room or say "have you seen so&so, he's lost x lbs. by just changing his diet and exercising!" or "Is it really that noticeable?!" uhhhh yeah b!+€#!! I went from a 22+(started wearing only yoga pants after 22 didn't fit) to a friggin 12!! I'd say that's pretty significant!!! Some people are just jealous, hateful jerks!! You go girl!! Keep up the good work!!

@@wantingabetterlife my brother says legally they have to give you water, I don't know if that's true or not.

Boy! Not in California! You have to beg for a glass of water!

@iclemur...thats bc there haa been a drought since the 80s... lol

I keep meeting people that are morbidly obese, yet say that they hardly eat anything everyday. What? It really comes down to an overabundance of daily calories and lack of exercise when you are more than 100 pounds overweight. It just seems that some have the hardest time admitting that they are an overeater. Even on this forum, I have read posts from others saying they never over ate and got very obese from psych meds and hypothyroidism alone. Sorry, no. Meds and thyroid problems will not cause more than a 10-25 pound weight gain.

Such denial will really get in the way of weight loss success after surgery.

Ok. Just a small pet peeve. And apologies to the newbies.

Sometimes I'm reading a thread with advice on diet and exercise and all good WLS guidelines.... Only to look up the poster and find that they are pre- op....I'm glad they have solid advice, but....

My hope is that people have some experience and a bit of WLS life under their belt before telling other post ops how to correct an issue they are having.

We are all here to help each other... But not by READING the info a Doc has given you....

This is a long term solution and I'm not closed minded to new ideas, but perhaps pre op could identify that they have a source of info.... NOT real life experience. Just me⭐️

I agree with you on that one completely! There was a post the other day from a lady arguing that she was tired of hearing that your stomach capacity increases after you hit the one year post op mark. I can't remember the exact words used, but she went on to say that your restriction stays the same even many years after surgery. Was this from her own personal experience? Nope. She hadn't even gone through surgery yet.

I mean, how do you really know if you haven't experienced it for yourself?

Reality

I DO have thyroid and I am on steroids often and I can gain 10-20 lbs within days. It is partly why I had the surgery so I just can't eat what I feel I need when on meds. Of course we know it is eating and lack of exercise is what helps make us fat. But I'm eating around 600 calories am exercising and due to thyroid and meds am barely loosing, so DONT tell me they mean nothing.

Reality: I've had hypothyroidism for the past eight years and have been on psych meds. I never mentioned steroids, which I know contributes to weight gain. My last blood panel still showed my thyroid was still low and it does make weight loss a struggle, but not impossible. I had surgery almost 11 months ago and I remember how frustrating it was the first few months post op. Like you, I had to reduce my calories to around 600 for the first 6 months.

I never mentioned that hypothyroidism and meds mean nothing. In fact, I mentioned that they do contribute to weight gain. If the two are combined with crappy eating (overeating, junk food), then it is quite easy to get 100 pounds overweight.

The point I was trying to make was that there are SOME people that are somewhat reluctant to recognize faults or problems in themselves. In other words, denial. You have to be honest about the kinds and amount of food you ate before surgery. You have to come to terms with your denial. If you stay in denial, it may keep you from having the responsibility for yourself. If you fool yourself into believing that you don't eat much everyday, then it is easy to deny responsibility for your obesity. This will keep you from changing behaviors that are necessary in order to successful after weight loss surgery.

Then there are those that rationalize their obesity (excuses, excuses, excuses) or create defense mechanisms. Unpleasant emotions are created when we realize what we have done to get morbidly obese and many create excuses (blaming morbid obesity solely so on genetics, society, a medication) to keep these emotions at bay.

We all know that it is hard to lose weight and keep it off. Learning all those new behaviors and giving up your favorite food is difficult. A healthier body will result from your having a healthier mindset.

I'm almost positive people don't say anything when you've OBVIOUSLY drop a ton of weight because they don't want to seem rude. It's awkward to have a conversation about another persons weight. I can, with close friends but I can see why people just stay quiet. I get a LOT of up and down looks so I know they notice. Some will finally get curious enough to say something. It's kinda funny.

Pet peeve - going out with a group of friends and they eat appetizers, main course, dessert and several bottles of wine... I have a salad or appetizer... At the end of the meal they say "Let's just split the check.". Since I haven't told too many people about the wls, I don't want to bring attention to it. So, in the past few months I haven't joined the gang...