Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Has anyone kept their surgery a secret?



Recommended Posts

At first I was very embarrassed that I had the surgery, I was only 20 at the time. As you can imagine with social media a lot of people were asking a lot of questions. My sister had her surgery done a year before myself and she was very public about it (@fromonefatbitchtoanother is her Instagram if you want to check it out). It was very obvious what I'd had done. If people asked I wouldn't lie, but I definitely wasn't shouting it from the roof tops. I am now 6 stone lighter and I couldn't care less what people thought about it. I am proud of who I am now and peoples opinions don't bother me anymore. I still don't shout it from the roof tops, but I am comfortable with telling people the truth and really educating them on the matter. Especially those idiots who think 'healthy eating and exercise' is the 'right' way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 12/31/2018 at 11:50, J Johnston said:



Only my husband, children and best friend know. I'm very private. Because my husband is dieting and we are eating very low carb, when folks ask, I attribute it to a change in diet.


Very few people know. About 4 people. My mother doesn’t even know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

12 minutes ago, MeanSleevedMachine said:

I tried to. Then my wife told her mother and that is pretty much like telling the world.

This is not okay, talk about a break in trust. How can we trust someone again when they tell other people what is private to us?

I would be most distressed if the one person who knows about my procedure had told other people, I explained my need for privacy and I hope they respect that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I tried to. Then my wife told her mother and that is pretty much like telling the world.
I'm so angry for you!!! [emoji35] [emoji35] [emoji35] [emoji35]

Sent from my LGL59BL using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My family knows, but I have not told anyone outside of my family that I am having the surgery. I just got my date recently and am not sure how to approach work with it.

Saying "I'll be out of work for 3 weeks because I'm having surgery" is simple enough, but seems weird to leave it at that. I don't like lying, but I don't want them to know. I don't want people at working looking at me all the time or checking on how I'm doing, etc. I dislike that kind of attention.

Any suggestions on how to phrase it?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My family knows, but I have not told anyone outside of my family that I am having the surgery. I just got my date recently and am not sure how to approach work with it.
Saying "I'll be out of work for 3 weeks because I'm having surgery" is simple enough, but seems weird to leave it at that. I don't like lying, but I don't want them to know. I don't want people at working looking at me all the time or checking on how I'm doing, etc. I dislike that kind of attention.
Any suggestions on how to phrase it?
I think saying you're having surgery is enough. No one needs to know what kind or why. If they check on you it's because they care. Most people have surgery because something is wrong, so just say, "I'm feeling better. Thank you." I don't know that most people will say, why what's wrong with you? They will probably just ask, are you okay? "I will be!" Just my opinion. I didn't tell anyone either, but I had people ask if I was ok or feeling better after.

Sent from my LGL59BL using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 01/27/2019 at 08:12, WLH said:



My family knows, but I have not told anyone outside of my family that I am having the surgery. I just got my date recently and am not sure how to approach work with it.




Saying "I'll be out of work for 3 weeks because I'm having surgery" is simple enough, but seems weird to leave it at that. I don't like lying, but I don't want them to know. I don't want people at working looking at me all the time or checking on how I'm doing, etc. I dislike that kind of attention.




Any suggestions on how to phrase it?


I told people that everything was fine, and that I was going to be out for a few.weeks for personal reasons and I might telework some. I didn’t even tell them I was having surgery or how long I’d be out. But I also have aging parents, so people could easily have assume it was something with them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

17 minutes ago, jesseycakes said:

I think saying you're having surgery is enough. No one needs to know what kind or why. If they check on you it's because they care. Most people have surgery because something is wrong, so just say, "I'm feeling better. Thank you." I don't know that most people will say, why what's wrong with you? They will probably just ask, are you okay? "I will be!" Just my opinion. I didn't tell anyone either, but I had people ask if I was ok or feeling better after.

Sent from my LGL59BL using BariatricPal mobile app

I was thinking of saying "Nothing serious" but it is a serious surgery. I'm over-thinking it too much. I like the "I will be!" answer :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

17 minutes ago, notmyname said:
43 minutes ago, WLH said:


My family knows, but I have not told anyone outside of my family that I am having the surgery. I just got my date recently and am not sure how to approach work with it.


Saying "I'll be out of work for 3 weeks because I'm having surgery" is simple enough, but seems weird to leave it at that. I don't like lying, but I don't want them to know. I don't want people at working looking at me all the time or checking on how I'm doing, etc. I dislike that kind of attention.


Any suggestions on how to phrase it?

I told people that everything was fine, and that I was going to be out for a few.weeks for personal reasons and I might telework some. I didn’t even tell them I was having surgery or how long I’d be out. But I also have aging parents, so people could easily have assume it was something with them.

Except for my immediate supervisor, I think that might work. But I'm also afraid that would start a big rumor/gossip/guessing thing going. Unfortunately, the people I work with can be very intrusive. I already go against the norm for not sharing all details of my life..haha!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I’m planning to keep it private and am only telling my husband. It’s not a conversation I want to have over and over again with people who don’t understand.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

When they have never done this they have no point of reference. Its Your Path, Your struggle and Yours will be the final victory.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I did at first but now only close family and friends know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Mine is a secret as well. Only my husband, mother and sister know not even my children. I didn’t tell my husband until after we were married, I got it during our engagement phase.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would not say I necessarily announce it, but I don't hide it either. If the situation calls for it, I will inform someone of it, but I don't go out of my way to tell people. So I guess I am a bit indifferent about others knowing? Sorry if I am not much help. lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×