Not a patient

[optimist92 1]

Hi,
I have a friend that just had Bariatric Surgery, I believe she had the sleeve done if I remember correctly and she has been post op for 3.5 weeks now. I noticed she only walks around the inside of her apartment, and that's about it. She has literally spent her time watching TV, gaming, and watching YouTube on foods she's planning on eating after she's ok to have regular food again. Of course, aside from doing things outside the house like getting groceries, that's really the only she puts any effort into walking or just doing anything. She has gone on short walk 3 times with the dog since the surgery (no big deal...Wasn't expecting her to run a half marathon) I'm trying to be supportive but seeing her choose gaming and other tasks (where sitting down is primary) over exercise is starting to worry me. She does express when she's in pain and I completely understand and I tell her to relax and take it easy, but it's driving me insane on how irresponsible (I guess we can call it that) she is being. She's doing the shakes as required, started the soft foods stage, and has quickly learned (4-5 times already) that she can't eat as much as she used to. I don't want to be harsh considering she did have the procedure done...But where is the line drawn between being supportive and wanting HER to be proactive?? I suggested to her to maybe start off using 5 lb weights to start doing something, and she hasn't touched them at all. Please help. Should I give her more time?
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[Hellya 144]

This is her journey. I don't think it's your job to "encourage" her. In fact, I don't think it's any of your business.

[Layma 30]

Hi,
I have a friend that just had Bariatric Surgery, I believe she had the sleeve done if I remember correctly and she has been post op for 3.5 weeks now. I noticed she only walks around the inside of her apartment, and that's about it. She has literally spent her time watching TV, gaming, and watching YouTube on foods she's planning on eating after she's ok to have regular food again. Of course, aside from doing things outside the house like getting groceries, that's really the only she puts any effort into walking or just doing anything. She has gone on short walk 3 times with the dog since the surgery (no big deal...Wasn't expecting her to run a half marathon) I'm trying to be supportive but seeing her choose gaming and other tasks (where sitting down is primary) over exercise is starting to worry me. She does express when she's in pain and I completely understand and I tell her to relax and take it easy, but it's driving me insane on how irresponsible (I guess we can call it that) she is being. She's doing the shakes as required, started the soft foods stage, and has quickly learned (4-5 times already) that she can't eat as much as she used to. I don't want to be harsh considering she did have the procedure done...But where is the line drawn between being supportive and wanting HER to be proactive?? I suggested to her to maybe start off using 5 lb weights to start doing something, and she hasn't touched them at all. Please help. Should I give her more time?
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Try living on apple sauce or Gatorade for two weeks and tell me how excited you are about going on walks. We won't even get on about losing 80 percent of the body organ..

[optimist92 1]

i want to help and encourage her but I know being active is a way of helping manage the sleeve being done in the first place. I'm kindly asking for advice, from people who have had the same situation. I don't want to over step my boundaries, hence why I thought of coming to this forum first. I'm sorry if it came off rude or uncaring.

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[Berry78 4,259]

Encouragement can come in many forms. Keep in mind she isn't even allowed to lift weights for at least a month after surgery (maybe 2!). Walking is good, but patients tend to be stubborn. Maybe win her over with sweetness. "Wow. I can't believe how you transforming before my eyes! Do you want to go window shopping?" Walking around stores and trying on clothes is plenty of exercise for now. You going with her will be nice.

Small surgery on the outside, big surgery on the inside. Her stomach won't be healed for 8-12 weeks at least. Some say the scar tissue won't be fully formed for 6 months. So there is time. Ideally she'll start a regular physical routine by 6-8 weeks post op. Walking 1 mile a day is a good goal to start, depending on her fitness.

These early days are all about healing. Some days she'll have plenty of get up and go, and others she'll sleep all day.

[PatientEleventyBillion 851]

2 hours ago, optimist92 said:

Should I give her more time?

Until what?

[Syaniya 319]

i want to help and encourage her but I know being active is a way of helping manage the sleeve being done in the first place. I'm kindly asking for advice, from people who have had the same situation. I don't want to over step my boundaries, hence why I thought of coming to this forum first. I'm sorry if it came off rude or uncaring.

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Well I would say thst if in 3 months she decides to just sit around there's a problem. Im 2 weeks post op and didnt feel like doing much. Today was my first day back to work and I feel as if I got in as many steps today as I have in the last 2 weeks, lol. I definitely understand being worried and wanting to motivate her, but give her a few it is a surgery and a life change. Not eating but 500 calories a day also doesnt give us much energy. Give her time then ask her to go for a walk with you you keep you company.

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[Sosewsue61 3,185]

It's admirable to want to help and be supportive. Please do not bring up with her what you brought up here, since you cannot know all the decisions that go into having this surgery or anyone's emotional state it would come off very poorly. If you want to educate yourself - go youtube the actual surgery and go read what preop and postop diet requirements are and then just be a true friend and ask if she needs anything. A game of cards to take her mind off food or pain, or anything but bring up you getting involved in her journey unless she decides to involve you.

[ssflbelle 829]

It is great that you want to encourage her but now really is not the time. She is still recovering from this surgery. Some of the advise others gave for this time of recovery were good ones. Get her mind off of the pain and the food she can't eat. Later when she has begun to eat food taking a walk with her and other easy things would be very helpful.

I was not even allowed to ride my tricycle until 4 weeks after my surgery, when I was finally able to eat things like cottage cheese, yogurt, cheese sticks. Once I got some food I felt more energy returning and was even able to go back to work. However I didn't just have the sleeve. I also had a hernia repaired and my gallbladder removed.

[Introversion 1,876]

I was sleeved 2 years ago. For the first six weeks post-op I felt too sluggish to do anything besides sleep, use the restroom, and go to work. The post-anesthesia fog affected me for weeks after the surgery. Nowadays I am a ball of energy who runs several miles a day and goes on sporadic hikes on nature trails in/near the city where I live.

In other words, give your newly sleeved friend some time. Her body's been through trauma.

Edited April 16, 2017 by Introversion

[kins117 104]

She is less than a month out of major surgery, not your business. She is still recovering.

[thisisthenewme 358]

My dietitian said that even at 3 MONTHS post op I should be taking it easy. Walking yes, when energy is good (which was not till 2 months post op) and then the gym once a week. Weights not till 8-12 weeks I believe. Maybe you should do some research?? Just a thought. As someone else said, maybe just play some cards, listen, watch tv with her...keep her company. Oh and by the way, I also googled recipes while I was sitting on my butt resting as I was told to do!

[601chic 14]

My dietitian said that even at 3 MONTHS post op I should be taking it easy. Walking yes, when energy is good (which was not till 2 months post op) and then the gym once a week. Weights not till 8-12 weeks I believe. Maybe you should do some research?? Just a thought. As someone else said, maybe just play some cards, listen, watch tv with her...keep her company. Oh and by the way, I also googled recipes while I was sitting on my butt resting as I was told to do!

I'm hoping you're not saying that a dietician suggested no regular walking until 2 months when you feel up to it. You have to ambulate, I'm not saying vigorous exercise like Zumba or whatever, but a Walk to the end of your street....something!! If not, you will be at risk for pneumonia and/or blood clots post operatively. Rest within reason

[optimist92 1]

Thanks for the advice everyone, it's been helpful..I have done some research and that's why I came to this thread before bringing it up to her personally. I understand how stressful/painful surgery can be (as I have gone through surgeries myself) and I came here to prevent over stepping my boundaries. The risk for possible blood clots was what worries me the most, thanks for clearing this up. I really appreciate it.

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[Dashofpixiedust8 1,469]

@optimist92 It's very nice of you to want to help your friend, I'm also glad you did not go to her first with this. As others have said, she is only a few weeks out from surgery. Surgery affects everyone differently. I do not do well after surgery. It is good for her to walk around a bit but she may not feel up to taking long walks. Maybe just suggest you both take a lap around the house every so often, that's all I was up for for several weeks after surgery. I had complications so I was weaker than most though.

Being on liquid is never fun either. I also was looking forward to the food I could eat. If she can eat soft food, she can eat pureed. What really helped me what making food I liked but just pureeing it. It tasted good it was just mushy. Foods cooked in a crock pot are best for pureeing.