I told my first surgery lie today. I'm having surgery Oct 10th and starting to prepare things/people for after. So far nobody has asked what the surgery is for, but today someone did! I'm not telling people who are not all that close to me or I think wouldn't be supportive. So I told her I was having a hernia repaired. Unlike a lot of people here, I'm actually not, so it was just a flat out lie. I hate lying!! I felt so awkward. She apologized right away and said "oh I'm sorry, that's personal" probably because I looked so awkward answering her, lol. Anyone else lying? Hope I get more secure with answering. I'm dreading the moment someone says oh I had that done too and want to talk more technical details with me. I better brush up on hernia logistics just in case, lol!

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@@blizair09 - it seems that we not only have the same surgery day (+\- one day) but also the same airline / lounge loyalty! I admire your ability to be so open about your journey - I guess that I am just more of a private person. Your support network sounds fantastic. Best of luck with your surgery next week!

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@@Nerdgrl

It's great to "meet" another Delta person! Because I'm going to be on leave for six weeks after the surgery, I probably won't make Diamond for next year. I hit the 2017 platinum mark last week, and I'll have about 4 good weeks of travel once I come back to work, so if I get close enough, can find a decent fare, and physically feel like doing it, I might do a mileage run to put me over the top. Being Diamond is addictive, and I would definitely miss it!

All my best for your upcoming surgery. I am scared to death, but I take a lot of solace in the fact that I have put myself in the best position for it. (And the fact that my mom and dad are coming for 2 weeks to be with my partner and me throughout the whole thing makes it a lot better, too!)

Pre-surgery, I didn't really feel comfortable telling anyone outside of family or close friends. However, as the weight started to come off, many of my coworkers asked my secret...and the fact that my diet was so restricted coupled with the weight loss tipped them off. I never had any negative reactions, and most people commented how courageous it was for me to have taken action to improve my health!

In May, I relocated to the United Kingdom from Florida because I got married on 20 August. The close friends I had here in the UK were all aware of my surgery and very supportive, but since I have been here, I've obviously met many new people and forged new friendships and professional relationships. These new people in my life don't know me as "Obese Polara," they see me as I am now. My surgery was 9 December 2015, and at over 9 months out, my diet is more varied than it was immediately post-op (kind of a no-brainer statement, lol!). However, I still follow the dietary guidelines given to me by my surgeon, nurse practitioner, and NUT to the letter. The restrictive nature of the surgery coupled with the changes to my mental relationship with food means that I'll always opt for Protein, veg, and fruits over anything else (I have no desire to eat bread, Pasta, etc.), but everyone simply assumes that I am very health-conscious (which is actually the truth and 100% spot-on) and not a huge eater.

I am not ashamed of the fact that I was sleeved and I will open up to people about it if I feel the circumstances warrant it. In fact, because I was open with my best friend about having the procedure, she felt confident enough to start the process herself. She's having the surgery this coming weekend in the Czech Republic, and I am actually very humbled that she asked me to accompany her as her support person, so we will be flying out together Sunday!

I guess that the point of this ramble is that who you choose to tell or not tell is your business, but you'd be surprised how understanding many people can be. Of course, there are a lot of people out there who have negative opinions about bariatric surgery, but if you feel you can trust someone, letting them know can actually be cathartic. As time passes, you may feel more comfortable discussing it. Take it day by day and enjoy the journey. Lots and lots of good vibes your way!

Xx,

Polara

@@Polara

Great post! It sounds like you are the PERFECT person to support your friend. Safe travels.

@@blizair09

Thank you! It's not easy, but it's very worth it in the end...you got this! \o/

@@katie09/21/2016 - I would have done the EXACT same thing! You don't owe anyone details from your personal life, particularly not people whom you don't expect have your best interest at heart. Do what you need to do to protect yourself from negativity - if you're anything like me, I have enough negativity of my own to battle without absorbing any from others. More importantly, it looks like your surgery is coming up in a few days - best of luck for an easy surgery and a quick recovery!

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Thank you and yes, I have enough negative battles going on - I don't need to invite more in! I guess lied in that moment to protect myself. Appreciate the support!

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I had a hiatal hernia repaired anyway during this surgery so that's what I told people. I am not ashamed as there is nothing to be ashamed of, but some people like to judge and at "only" 217 lbs lol, there are many who would tell me WLS was a ridiculous option.

So just do what makes things easier for you.

I am currently exactly the same weight as you!! going into my surgery on Wednesday

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I weight 226 and have had the same reaction... you just need diet & exercise. Surgery is on 29th!

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I have been honest with everyone. I am so excited about my new journey and idc who likes it and who doesn't.

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I have been honest with everyone. I am so excited about my new journey and idc who likes it and who doesn't.

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Good for you!! Best wishes as you move forward with your journey.

A LOT of people here ave hernias with surgery and my husband has had TWO since surgery. You are not lying. Don't let your guilt override your mouth because it is your business and no one else's. My husband refused to let me tell his 31 year old son. Or neighbors, or friends. No one is the wiser. We dieted, lost weight, TRUTH, and now we watch everything we eat. No one even questions our eating, and we go out a lot. Good luck, be strong!

I tell everyone and anyone. I'm so excited for this new journey. I don't care if someone tells me it's not a good idea or that I'm not "fat enough" I am doing this for me and my life but I'm bursting at the seams for everyone to know I'm happy with my decision. I'm hoping to have my date set for the end of October beginning of November. My mom wants me to wait till my classes are done in December but I don't know if I can wait that long

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Love everyone's thoughts! I really hate to lie too, and feel like I should be brave and stand up for this option against this horrible beast that is obesity. But I'm just not there quite yet. Right now, I feel like people look at me and just see my weight. I can't get past the thought that if I loose weight with this method people will just look at me and see the surgery. I really shouldn't give a crap what others think. Obviously this is my life and I'm doing this to give me and my family a better quality of life. But that judgement is still in the back of my head. I admire you all!

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I just tell the truth,I was so excited about it! I've lost 43lbs & my surgery was on July 6th,I'm at a stand still ,plus I've eatin' some things I probably shouldn't have! But tomorrow & getting right back on my 3 meals,& my Water. I have 65 more lbs I want you lose. I got lazy,bc I haven't lost any for like 3 weeks!!! I think it's very common,it just seems like you work so hard,I don't even own a scale,but I can tell I haven't lost!!!

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