Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Feeling like I am taking the easy way out :-/



Recommended Posts

I suspect once you are a few years post op you will no longer view this as "the easy way out". For me, nothing easy about it... I view it as "the only way out"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How does everyone deal with the feelings of wishing you could've lost the weight and kept it off with diet & exercise alone..and achieve that?

I would obviously feel awesome if I could do it, but after a million times trying in 10+ years...it's not working!

I am in the process of getting wls, but I keep holding onto this feeling of failure or the feeling of wishing I could accomplish my weight loss goal with diet & exercise, I know getting wls is not taking the easy way out and it still takes work but I wish there was a way to not tell anyone about it...but close family & friends are going to know of course when I can't eat much for awhile & when they see me thru the recovery process.

Well I was in the same boat but didnt care what others thought. We seem to have some of the same things in common, ht wt and longevity of trying not only to lose weight but to keep it off for a lifetime. I am 6 days post op and after being denied twice by my insurance company there is not one thing I would have done different. So GIRL......Go for it. I don't believe you will be sorry.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I guess I feel like more of a failure in losing and keeping the weight off because I know I am capable of it with diet & exercise...but my emotional eating (worse with having a mood disorder), constant hunger, cravings & out of control appetite make it so hard..in addition to that I can't stick to anything to save my life, I go from diet to diet and practically starving myself at times until I end up binge eating by the 3rd day and the cycle continues..but are all these good reasons to get wls? Are these some or all of the same problems others have that had surgery to lose the weight and keep it off?

I don't have any health problems that cause weight gain, but I do take required medications that contribute to increased appetite & slower metabolism.

I don't know who I am trying to prove all this to? :-/ I guess only myself. Because I really shouldn't care about anyone else's opinion, but I wish I had the willpower and motivation and dedication, etc to do this on my own, but I haven't been able to in the last 12 years so I deserve a solution to be happy with how I look and feel

And with this new "tool" I am confident that I can achieve that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I guess I feel like more of a failure in losing and keeping the weight off because I know I am capable of it with diet & exercise...but my emotional eating (worse with having a mood disorder), constant hunger, cravings & out of control appetite make it so hard..in addition to that I can't stick to anything to save my life, I go from diet to diet and practically starving myself at times until I end up binge eating by the 3rd day and the cycle continues..but are all these good reasons to get wls? Are these some or all of the same problems others have that had surgery to lose the weight and keep it off?

I don't have any health problems that cause weight gain, but I do take required medications that contribute to increased appetite & slower metabolism.

I don't know who I am trying to prove all this to? :-/ I guess only myself. Because I really shouldn't care about anyone else's opinion, but I wish I had the willpower and motivation and dedication, etc to do this on my own, but I haven't been able to in the last 12 years so I deserve a solution to be happy with how I look and feel

And with this new "tool" I am confident that I can achieve that.

Why do you need to take these medications? Cant you just control your health issues on your own? Without the medications? If you can just find enough willpower, motivation & dedication then surely you shouldn't need the help of these medications? See my point?

I am a very motivated and dedicated person but I had something I still needed help with and thank goodness I had the option of receiving that help.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You don't fix a cavity on your own, you see a denist, right ? Same with a broken leg (a cast and crutches )hearing problem ( a hearing aid ) eyesight problems (glasses or contacts) etc. If someone said " I have a drinking problem and Im going to work wth my Dr. and rehab so I can live a long , healthy life !" , well nobody would tell them to "solve it by themselves " would they ?? I dont think so !!! They would be congratulated for making a smart decision !! Same with WLS. YOU are making a smart decision to get a strong , healthier body. So, CONGRATULATE yourself !!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How is having a major surgery, counting everything that goes into your mouth, making sure you take lots of Vitamins on time every day, getting enough Protein in, exercising every day, and getting enough liquids in for the rest of your life taking the easy way out.???? I must say it's kinda hard but soooooooooooooo worth it. Mine was 6/17/13 137 lb. loss :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I guess I feel like more of a failure in losing and keeping the weight off because I know I am capable of it with diet & exercise...but my emotional eating (worse with having a mood disorder), constant hunger, cravings & out of control appetite make it so hard..in addition to that I can't stick to anything to save my life, I go from diet to diet and practically starving myself at times until I end up binge eating by the 3rd day and the cycle continues..but are all these good reasons to get wls? Are these some or all of the same problems others have that had surgery to lose the weight and keep it off?

I don't have any health problems that cause weight gain, but I do take required medications that contribute to increased appetite & slower metabolism.

I don't know who I am trying to prove all this to? :-/ I guess only myself. Because I really shouldn't care about anyone else's opinion, but I wish I had the willpower and motivation and dedication, etc to do this on my own, but I haven't been able to in the last 12 years so I deserve a solution to be happy with how I look and feel

And with this new "tool" I am confident that I can achieve that.

there is medication that I will stop need for along time due to mental disorders ,plz don't beat yourself up..I just have to work harder..everyone's different..Its not a matter of self discipline or willpower or lack thereof it's a real struggle and I still do daily. I'm not saying it's an excuse so I don't wanna start a war of words or opinions with anyone I understand what your saying. When I had my total thyroid work up I had to go on armour med and it helped alot but still struggling with emotional eating. Hang in there. I take 1 day at a time. Xx ????

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I believe the type of surgery does matter......granted, I don't have experience with bypass or th sleeve, but I know from my experience the mere presence of the band wrapped around the upper portion of my stomach sends a constant message to my brain that I am "Full"..and do not need to eat anymore.

A mental note of being "Full", not a physical feeling.

That in itself cure a lot of my pre-surgery eating issues, and adding other factors such as the inability to over eat whether I wanted to or not, eventually all add up to a simple formula.

But getting there was very hard, frustrating, and at times I wanted to give up...because with the band it is a process, not an overnight thing.

But then, all this is from MY experience only...not what others may experience.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I *AM* doing it through diet and exercise. The surgery keeps me from rebounding.

I've always been amazing at losing weight - pitiful at keeping it off. Case in point; I'd lost almost 100 lbs as of Valentines day. I was feeling pretty smoking. All of a sudden, my left arm didn't work and I was falling a lot. Fast forward to two and a half months later - I wasn't able to work out, I hit the Skittles and Potato chips instead of the chicken and green Beans. I've gained four pounds.

Before surgery, in that same time frame, I'd have gained at least 20 - possibly 40. Much easier to get back on track (aka Diet and Exercise) and lose 4 plus the other 80 than have to relose 40 and still go the other 80.

I recognize that my experience isn't the same as everyone's - but it's also not unique. The sleeve is *NOT* an easy way to lose weight, and it is *NOT* the easy way out. It is an awesome tool, though, if you're dedicated to using diet and exercise to get your health back.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"You don't fix a cavity on your own, you see a denist, right ? Same with a broken leg (a cast and crutches )hearing problem ( a hearing aid ) eyesight problems (glasses or contacts) etc. If someone said " I have a drinking problem and Im going to work wth my Dr. and rehab so I can live a long , healthy life !" , well nobody would tell them to "solve it by themselves " would they ?? I dont think so !!! They would be congratulated for making a smart decision !! Same with WLS. YOU are making a smart decision to get a strong , healthier body. So, CONGRATULATE yourself !!!!

Actually, this is an analogy I use for myself when speaking at support groups, etc....

I had a problem that needed medical attention, needed fixing....compare it to knee replacement, etc.

Something I was unable to do on my own (with traditional diets, etc) but had to be done.

So I went through surgery to "Get it fixed"....afterward I needed o go through rehab, to learn how to walk again with my new knees....and eventually I completed that rehab, adapted all the new habits until they become 2nd nature.....

Then I got back to my life...better than ever!

I didn't dwell on the surgery healing or rehab phase.although at the time it was tough...pure hell sometimes......didn't think it would pay off at all sometimes.....but I continued to move on....and eventually everything became "New Habits"

I could care less what other people think...I am me, and I did what was best for me.....and I'd be dead if I didn't so why should I apologize or feel guilty??

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Saw this sign today.............. " You can't make everyone happy, you're not a jar of Nutella !!" So for those that are getting no support, or very little, or even some negitive smack talk, about WLS, or anything else, quit worrying about every one else's opinion. Make YOURSELF happy. That is all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't see why people might say to a person you cheated you took the easy way I say to them it's my life and not yours and it's not your business what I do and how I do it. They think the surgery makes you loose the weight even if your stuffing your face in front of the Tv but they are so wrong you need to work hard to loose weight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

When I made the decision to have surgery, that was it for me. I wasn't scared, I didn't cheat, I set goals, I was laser focused. It wasn't until I was at the hospital and the nurse had just given me the IV that I broke down. I couldn't believe that I had allowed myself to get this way that I had to have surgery to fix it.

I promised that day no going back and I've maintained that laser focus. Find your moment.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Losing weight is hard. Maintaining that loss is harder. The longer you do it, the harder it gets. Having had WLS makes it easier and possible for me. Before WLS it was super hard, unsuccessful, and demoralizing to work that hard without success. So now I work hard, but at least I'm rewarded.

So while I don't want to offend anyone, I always feel like it's easier-for ME. I am not including the actual decision to have surgery, the prep time, or the actual surgery in that. I'm only referring to the comparison for the difficulty I experienced trying to restrict calories pre and post surgery. Before surgery I had a ridiculous drive to eat, all the time. Now, normal meals satisfy me, and then I can forget it. That is a night and day difference.

As another poster said, it's the only way out for me. And I don't feel a bit bad about it. I feel pretty darn good about a 140+ pound weight loss and my single digit clothes and my perfectly healthy body. Honestly, I wish it was easy. I'd feel even better about that!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well said MC????

Before WLS, I felt good and relatively successful into life... Except that one huge issue of being fat ... And yes I could lose some. But maintaining my weight was by far the hardest issue I faced.

Now I still must eat right and exercise and drink lots of water... But I can stay at the weight that is right for me

For years... (Never could after I had gained weight with kids and a mean spirited marriage)

Life is better for me at a smaller size

As I hope it is for many????

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×