Hey guys, I've just had my sleeve done, and I am wondering if it is it necessary to have a psychological support for some time. I consider that we have 3 factors for not losing weight: a physiological one (the fat cells that try to keep us in the same weight forever), a psychological one (the stress or anxiety is turned into hunger), and a genetic one (there are people who get stressed and get thinner - envy that!). With the surgery we cut the physiological, but the others remain.

What do you do to avoid getting fat again because of the psychological factors?

Thanks!!

Caio

Go get counseling

I'm seeing a psychologist. Those who have the disease of obesity -- that's us -- tend to medicate the stresses of life (both rough times and good times) with extra foods and less physical activity. We need to change those "go-to" responses. It seemed a no-brainer to me to give myself all the helpful resources I could muster along this WLS journey.

My plan is to see my psychologist for at least three years during (the following are my own titles):

* The year of losing weight,

* The year of maintaining a normal weight and

* The year of boring real life.

Edited December 4, 201411 yr by VSGAnn2014

Yes, that is what I think too!! When was your surgery? And did you start with the psychologist just afterwards? How do you think it is working?

Thanks!!

Caio

Caio, my surgery was August 18, 2014, which was 15+ weeks ago. I'm doing great. If you're looking at this post via a laptop you can see in my signature that I've lost 56 pounds total, including 37 pounds post-op.

Yes, I started seeing the psychologist pre-op. He's one of those who knows a lot about bariatric patients' issues, as well as other issues everyone struggles with. He's an all-around good counselor.

It's important to find a therapist who's compatible with you. I asked absolutely everyone at my bariatric center (except the surgeons) who they thought was the best therapist they'd ever met. Everyone named this guy. So I chose him, and it's been a good decision.

I saw him every week for about a month. And now I see him every 2-4 weeks, depending on my work travel schedule. For now, that's a good schedule for me.

In my on ground support group many try to blame their issue on the mental part of the game, but the bottom line is follow the rules and you will win. Sure there are some tough games our brains want to play, but sucess can be had if one concentrates on the rules of eating with a sleeve. If you follow most of the rules most of the time you will lose most of the weight. Its that easy:)

I go to a CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) group 2-3 times a month. It is led by a therapist trained in CBT strategies. At each meeting, the group members take turns talking about the highs and lows happening in their everyday life. Then the therapist presents a new CBT strategy, models it, and the group discusses possible real life uses and application. During the next meeting, we start out with if anyone used the strategy and how it helped. Most strategies are tools to combat stress, depression, anxiety, and addiction (food or substances). The number one rule is that there is no victim talk allowed. Which is great because we get new people all the time that want to throw a pity party.

I use to see a psychologist but quit because I wasn't learning anything to help me or change my life. It was just me talking for a whole hour. It's great to get your feelings out and have someone listen, but it wasn't for me. I always struggled to think of enough things to talk about for a whole hour. Most of the time, I could predict the advice I would get before the session even began.

I like the group dynamic and the feedback I get from peers as well as learning strategies that have real life application. I've got a much better handle on anxiety and depression compared to five years ago and the knowledge and strategies I've learned in my CBT group will continually help me make better choices.

Great insight also, WL Warrior!! I'll see if I can find one such group around my area. Thanks!

I use to see a psychologist but quit because I wasn't learning anything to help me or change my life. It was just me talking for a whole hour. It's great to get your feelings out and have someone listen, but it wasn't for me. I always struggled to think of enough things to talk about for a whole hour. Most of the time, I could predict the advice I would get before the session even began.

I like the group dynamic and the feedback I get from peers as well as learning strategies that have real life application.

I agree with you. I just don't buy into the whole shrink knows all, but has nothing specific to share. I put much more credence in a group of peers that have been through or are going through the process. Real life experiences.

Forgot to add.......my local WLS support group is also - FREE -

Ann I liked how you label the years. I am 3 years post op, so here is what I have named mine, in hindsight:

My surgery was Dec 2011 so

2012: Year of losing - wow, I felt so focused, so great. Lots of focus on food and exerciese

2013: Year of hitting goal, maintaining and exploring life, getting plastics, lots of emotional and life changes - the year of a little "crazy". still lots of focus on food and exercise.
2014: I call this year "stabilize". I am referring to way more than weight but rather to finding a lifestyle, a foundation of a new way of life. I had specific (not weight related) goals for this year and I am ALMOST there. More focus on "activity", while still exercising (working around some injuries)

2015: I haven't found my word yet, but I see it as a year of really taking off and leveraging everything that came before. Of building toward a life that is real and genuine for this next phase of my life.

I started seeing a counselor in 2013 and throughout much of 2014. I am cutting way back on that now as I am finding my path.

I am 5 weeks post surgery. I expected to go see one but it turns out I am not hungry at all. The stress eating thing is completely gone. I eat because I'm supposed to but not because of hunger. In fact, it's easy to forget to eat. That never happened to me before surgery.

For the past three weeks I have had significant lower back and shoulder neck pain. Guess what I found myself doing? EATING to make myself FEEL better. Ugggh, didn't work, of course. At least I recognise it sooner now. No damage done, but for pete's sake! Those pesky old responses are tough to recognise, modify behavior, try to figure out what would be a better choice to take care of the real problem. I would like to do that at the moment it happens- not two weeks later to have an ah haa moment, please

I saw a counselor for the year before surgery and right up until the week afterward and then I stopped going. My issue was more that my inability to stop eating made me feel out of control, which made everything else out of control. Once the control issue of food was removed, I found that even before I had lost the weight, I could see everything else from a better perspective and no longer needed my therapist.

I started seeing a therapist nearly a year post-op. My issue at that time was not learning how to manage my behavior but body image issues. I did not recognize myself when I looked in the mirror. I had lost around 100 lbs. but I did not see a thinner person...I saw an old woman looking back at me.

My hair was falling out, my skin was wrinkled, and I looked like my grandmother. I've gotten past the 'critical' issues of learning I need to give up some of my feelings of needing to be in control and I'm starting to get more comfortable with the much smaller sized person I've become but I'm now working with the therapist to tackle some of the deep issues surrounding my need to turn to food when I have emotional reactions to situations.

Whether you see a therapist, or go with a support group...or do both if you need to, the point is that you should do whatever you need to make yourself better be it weight loss surgery and/or followup support in whatever way you require it.

I agree with others in that those of us who are battling our weight have issues that manifest in overeating behaviors. Some abuse alcohol, others abuse drugs. We abuse food. I understand that I need to go deep to change my behaviors and need the help of a professional.

Others do not or they need different type(s) of support.

Good luck with whatever you choose...even if your choice is to do nothing beyond surgery.

Edited December 4, 201411 yr by gowalking

I benefitted from seeing a therapist while I was going through the research stage and then getting surgery. Discontinued after a while but boy was it helpful for me to have that third party objective person to help me break down specific behaviors related to overeating. I had worked so hard before on this kind of thing but this time the brutal self-honesty it takes to admit a problem big enough for surgery -- wow. No victim talk, indeed (love that above, whoever that was). I went from yes, I eat to tamp down my feelings to very, very spefic ways I was doing it -- this was tedious and I was a bit resistant. But the therapist got me to really spell it out. E.G. (Now past tense, thankfully): I'm in the car, behind the wheel, on my way to an appointment, I'm stressed, I want food, I stop for a treat and chooses one thing an naughty....because? And how does it taste? Um, don't even know, just had to do it. We'd go back and it turns out there was a lot of dialogue in that brain chatter. I deserve something......for me, a lot of my anxiety eating connected back to being worthy. Getting WLS was such a major leap -- choosing myself, giving myself this gift -- I think it plugged me back into something that had short circuited long ago. Sometimes I still have a bell go off in my head that sends me looking for food or thinking about it in that way -- I recognize it, smile and relax because I don't do that anymore.