Just wondering if anyone has become single as a result of the weight loss from their stomach sleeve?

Just wondering if anyone's spouses have become jealous because of the weight loss.

@@pinkbunies, Hi there... My answer to your question is yes. I am recently seperated from my husband due to my choice of having the surgery and the effects it makes on our daily lives. Hopefully you will not find your self in an unfortunate circumstance such as mine, but in the end the weight loss is worth all the change that comes with it. Even if it is sacraficing someone you love, somtimes you have to make a choice for yourself. The important people will grow with you and support you unconditionally. Best wishes to you.

That is just horrible!!! Actually I hope that losing weight will help me find someone cuz no likes the cute fat boys!!

Hey now don't put 'everyone' in the same category, I like "cute fat boys" just fine

I recently went to a weightloss seminar and they said divorce rates are high after WLS. Something to do with the person having more confidence. But I personally don't think that's it. I've noticed that a lot of obese people will settle on partners that they know isn't right for them, just for the sake of having someone. It's not until they lose weight that they realize they can do better.

That is just horrible!!! Actually I hope that losing weight will help me find someone cuz no likes the cute fat boys!!

Oh yes they do!

I've heard this too but never wanted to believe it. I've been with my husband for 17 years and I can't imagine us divorcing over this. When I first decided to have the surgery, my husband came home and said a friend of his told him that everyone he knows that had the surgery left their husband after. I was shocked!

Believe me... The statement that no one likes the cute fat boys... soooo off... LOL. I can admit I'm a little bit conceited and for the most part I've never been told no. I'm extremely charming and even when I was at a high of 320 lbs and I was single after a 10 year relationship... I met someone in less than a month and November makes 2 years for us. In that one month time period, I went on 10 dates and all 10 wanted something long term... I had to weed out the bad and find who I was really looking for.

So I gotta say on that end, don't be insecure. Usually the little people like us because we're great heaters in the winter time... we obviously know how to cook or can get take out really quick etc.

I used to love to keep the AC on 60... now 78 is considered cool for me. I'm cold all the time now but I bought a mattress warmer so hopefully it'll go un-noticed that i don't produce as much body heat lol.

I'm engaged to a pencil stick. They say opposites attract and I think its true. My last relationship did end because I got so big... but that was for the best, no regrets.

I keep asking... are you sure your still going to love me in six months when I'm not as big... the answer I keep getting is yes... and apparently my height was the big turn on.

I've heard that husbands get very secure with the wife being larger because they feel like they don't have to worry... they do love you but they don't think anyone else wants someone bigger... then you lose the weight, your a hottie all over again, he's looking at you differently, getting paranoid and jealous and then bam, he thinks your cheating or he just can't get it up anymore... so then I think you need to sit him down like a child... give him a pep talk... tell him that you feel your relationship is lacking in the sex department (this is me being devious ), you expect him to improve his performance and start getting testosterone injections... and I gotta say that stuff is amazing... a few treatments, confidence returns and then you'll have to keep him on a leash and blinders on him like a horse.

I had my weight loss surgery 4 months ago and am down 84lbs, and my husband is driving me nuts, he is convinced I am cheating on him, he said it has nothing to do with the weight loss but that's BS!!! 84 lbs ago he could care less what I did, were I went or if I even came home after a night out with the girls, now he blows up my phone the entire time Im out and I have never given him a reason to believe that I was. I am how ever going out more than I was, I no longer feel like the big pink elephant in the room and I can actually find cute clothes that fit me. Its really an insult that he felt like no one would bother with me before but now I might have a shot. He's even looked at my phone records and was calling numbers!!! I know 2 other people that have had surgeries and they to are now divorced which is were I feel like I want to be, not because I want to find better but because he thought so little of me. Just remember everyones different, Im just telling of my experience. Good luck!!!

Hubby's can be jerks. I personally think Jealousy is a turn on lol. I love it because it means they care.

My husband has always been a little insecure even when I was beyond unattractive. I'm sure he has his fears which are of course unfounded but at the same time he wanted me to be healthy and he's conflicted in that. We've been together 18 years, married for 10. I like to believe we can weather all storms.

aww. That's so sweet. When I was in Mexico, a man told me a story about him and his wife. they had been married for 22 years. He said he was around my size when they met. She was a hottie and in shape. He was pretty big. He said his biggest worry all these years was that his wife would leave him because of his weight... then he said he realized that their love was stronger than he imagined because she was right there with him while he was getting surgery and told him it was his choice and she loves him regardless of weather he does the surgery or not. He told me that they both even dieted together, she lost weight and he gained. She still stood by him. He said that he hopes everyone can find their true love like he did and he was pretty dang lucky.

@@RDYNEWME Do I know what your saying.... Yes! My husband is so jealous its insane! I feel like while I'm big he is happy with me being this way because he knows no other real/good man would want me. If I try to do my hair he'll say who your trying to impress? If I go on a diet he'll say who I'm trying to lose weight for? I work nights so every day he asks me if im cheating on him. I feel like he wants me to stay this way so no one else would notice me. Like he doesn't care how I feel or look as long as I'm here with him and working and paying all of these damn bills! I have major work to do on my mouth as well and I seriously believe that if he had the money to pay for the implants he wouldn't do it to help me. We've been together for almost 15 years now. I'm planning on getting the gastric sleeve surgery done in Tijuana Mexico and now everyday he comes home telling me stories from other people he knows who got the gastric sleeve surgery done to try and scare me. I refuse to let my husband dictate my life and future. If we do split after the surgery, then its for the best because I want to be with someone who wants me to feel good and look good. I'm only 32

@pinkbunies. For me jealousy is not a turn on. That person has a problem with himself/ herself and projects on the other person. My X husband was irrationally jealous and we are now divorced. He made my life miserable by accusing me of being involved with everyone; the attendant at the laundromat, the person remodeling the kitchen, the person looking into our car from their car. It's not caring, it's control and insecurity. I would find myself in the middle of a huge argument defending myself about not being involved with these strangers. Crazy! And no, this man never had any reason to believe I was ever, in anyway, unfaithful in our marriage. There was a 12 year age difference and I believe that may of been the basis for a lot of his issues. That and he was cheated on in the previous relationship. Either way it was his issues. I was not flattered in any way. I was sad and angry. Just my two cents.

@pinkbunies. For me jealousy is not a turn on. That person has a problem with himself/ herself and projects on the other person. My X husband was irrationally jealous and we are now divorced. He made my life miserable by accusing me of being involved with everyone; the attendant at the laundromat, the person remodeling the kitchen, the person looking into our car from their car. It's not caring, it's control and insecurity. I would find myself in the middle of a huge argument defending myself about not being involved with these strangers. Crazy! And no, this man never had any reason to believe I was ever, in anyway, unfaithful in our marriage. There was a 12 year age difference and I believe that may of been the basis for a lot of his issues. That and he was cheated on in the previous relationship. Either way it was his issues. I was not flattered in any way. I was sad and angry. Just my two cents.

Well said

You guys will get a kick out of this story: I met this guy about 5 years ago, we started off as friends which turned to friends with benefits, while all this was going on..he kept telling me we were just friends....well we did EVERYTHING together including 1.5 yrs later moving in with each other but it only lasted about a year when problems arose with his adult kids (that's another story) but I moved out...we didn't talk to each other for about 6 months I actually was so mad at him for the way things went down, but anyway.. from what I heard, he was miserable after I left but didn't hesitate to have sex with every female he could find, including with the 2 most hated women in my life.

We started talking again, and became "weekend" friends with benefits AGAIN, eventually I was asked to move back in...I hesitated but since I fell so head over heals for him the first time..I couldn't let go. Little did I know, when I moved in..the sex stopped...no kissing, no hugging...nada...so I asked him...um..whats up? He said living together is one thing...he didn't want things to get complicated by having sex since we are just friends. I was like in shock..now that I had given up my apartment to come to this?..I told him, had I known you were going to do this..I wouldn't have moved in...no response from that.

Anyway...I let it go..but we have been living together now a little over 2 years...we do EVERYTHING together, we sleep in the same bed..we go to family outings (both sides) together..he goes to the store and actually thinks of me...he buys me some of my favorite goodies I like....we actually have a friendship that is 100% similar to a marriage, everyone we know...introduces us as boyfriend & girlfriend and he doesn't correct them. .but yet to him..we are just best friends.

He is so supportive of my surgery....and knows that I am so excited about this...being thinner and healthier that I am afraid that when I do lose weight he might start getting closer to me..would I like that? sure since I love him so much..but why wont he admit that we actually have a relationship? Was it my weight preventing him from announcing to everyone he was in a relationship with a fat girl?...is he just a commitment phobe? Or will this be my chance to actually find someone else...who knows.

Kinda weird huh? would love to hear your thoughts on that icky situation!!