Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Eating When I'm Not Hungry :(



Recommended Posts

Uh oh. Just got back from DelTaco (8:30pm). Ate dinner at 6 (steak, sauteed mushrooms and broccoli) and wasn't even remotely hungry. Watching tv, hubby says "I want a taco and a burrito from Del Taco" (of course he's just finished 2 beers so I hafta drive). When we were in the drive thru, to his order I added a Crunchtada (a $1 tostoda). Ate about 2/3 of it.

Why? I'm not even hungry...

Am I alone or does anyone else kick themselves after going thru a drive thru?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's where that little saying comes in..

"They operated on your stomach not your brain"

Face it MOST of of ate out of want, not hunger..

This is the most challenging part of WLS..

Sounds like nights are the worse for you? I say that because of the bed, wine, Cereal ritual..

I feel for you, my husband would never drag our asses out of bed to go to a drive through..

You need to talk to him about what kind of support you need from him. And going to

Drive throughs are not it. I don't think I could be that strong if I had an partner like that..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is what scares me too. My husband is the same way. In the past when I had been dieting he would get sick and tired of the foods I was bringing in the house (healthy foods) and he would say something like "pizza sounds good, how about tonight we order pizza" knowing I can't have it but because he wants it, it ends up sabotaging my efforts to lose weight. It's selfish is what it is and just a few days ago I told him he can't do that anymore and that I really need him in my corner supporting me because I don't have anyone else. See, with him he has always been able to eat whatever he wants and not gain a pound but just in these last 3 years that has changed, he is getting older now (well in his 30's) and his metabolism isn't as awesome anymore. Granted he is still thin but when we started dating 15 years ago he weighed around 130 (really skinny) and now he weighs around 165. A lot has to do with his attitude that he can eat whatever he wants and ain't nobody gonna tell him what he can and can not eat. It's frustrating to say the least. Your husband is suppose to be supporting you in your efforts to lose weight and when he mentions going out to a fast food restaurant (where you have to go with him) then he is putting his own wants before your needs and that's just not right. Recognize it now and nip it in the bud before it gets out of control.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There's another concept here…that is that the only person who can really sabotage your weight loss efforts is you.

I'm the main cook and bottle washer for my family. My husband is appealing a decision by the insurance company against weight loss surgery, but has been a little crazy with the kids since that point.

Look, just because someone orders pizza doesn't mean you have to eat it. Or even stay in the house while they do. Just because your husband wants Del Taco at 8 doesn't mean you have to drive him there. And yes, I TOTALLY get that you don't want him driving impaired. On the other hand, you're not the boss of him. If you see the first 2-3 pages of the Enabling thread, before it jumps the shark, these behaviors are what got us all to the point of WLS.

There's nothing that is harder at first than saying no to the people you love. My husband in particular is a pouter if everything is not just so. He also pouts that I have "gotten a jump on him" in WLS, and complains about how unfair it is. But I refuse to let that influence me off the path I have chosen.

Marfar, I know you're working through all this. But saying no to yourself is also important. Substitute! Make the drive but don't order something. Or, have your excuse ready and stick to your guns. The other night I was asked by a bunch of friends to go out and have a drink. I was just recently cleared for alcohol in very small amounts and I really enjoy the odd cocktail here or there. But I hadn't had a drink yet since surgery and I knew it wouldn't be putting me in an ideal situation. I said no, but it wasn't easy because I got the whole, "Oh, come on! One drink with us. It'll be fun! You've worked so hard." It's like they were the voices in my head. But I left. And it really wasn't hard to not have a drink when I was home and in a situation that I control. You know?

I know it sucks to be in a situation that you need to weigh the long term outcome vs the short term "benefits" but it is a muscle like any other and it needs to be exercised in order for it to work properly. We fatties are brilliant at ignoring the long term in favor of gratification. But we can change. And unfortunately, that change often needs to happen in spite of what is going on around us, or who supports us.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There's another concept here…that is that the only person who can really sabotage your weight loss efforts is you.

I'm the main cook and bottle washer for my family. My husband is appealing a decision by the insurance company against weight loss surgery, but has been a little crazy with the kids since that point.

Look, just because someone orders pizza doesn't mean you have to eat it. Or even stay in the house while they do. Just because your husband wants Del Taco at 8 doesn't mean you have to drive him there. And yes, I TOTALLY get that you don't want him driving impaired. On the other hand, you're not the boss of him. If you see the first 2-3 pages of the Enabling thread, before it jumps the shark, these behaviors are what got us all to the point of WLS.

There's nothing that is harder at first than saying no to the people you love. My husband in particular is a pouter if everything is not just so. He also pouts that I have "gotten a jump on him" in WLS, and complains about how unfair it is. But I refuse to let that influence me off the path I have chosen.

Marfar, I know you're working through all this. But saying no to yourself is also important. Substitute! Make the drive but don't order something. Or, have your excuse ready and stick to your guns. The other night I was asked by a bunch of friends to go out and have a drink. I was just recently cleared for alcohol in very small amounts and I really enjoy the odd cocktail here or there. But I hadn't had a drink yet since surgery and I knew it wouldn't be putting me in an ideal situation. I said no, but it wasn't easy because I got the whole, "Oh, come on! One drink with us. It'll be fun! You've worked so hard." It's like they were the voices in my head. But I left. And it really wasn't hard to not have a drink when I was home and in a situation that I control. You know?

I know it sucks to be in a situation that you need to weigh the long term outcome vs the short term "benefits" but it is a muscle like any other and it needs to be exercised in order for it to work properly. We fatties are brilliant at ignoring the long term in favor of gratification. But we can change. And unfortunately, that change often needs to happen in spite of what is going on around us, or who supports us.

Perfectly said!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Uh oh. Just got back from DelTaco (8:30pm). Ate dinner at 6 (steak, sauteed mushrooms and broccoli) and wasn't even remotely hungry. Watching tv, hubby says "I want a taco and a burrito from Del Taco" (of course he's just finished 2 beers so I hafta drive). When we were in the drive thru, to his order I added a Crunchtada (a $1 tostoda). Ate about 2/3 of it.

Why? I'm not even hungry...

Am I alone or does anyone else kick themselves after going thru a drive thru?

I practice saying no to my family with fast foods. They want to go buy fast food, then they can, I myself will not do it. I know that the food at fast food places are total cr** and I don't want to slip into my addiction of food.....I am working on eating clean. I do say no to fast foods or will find something that's healthy if I'm really crazed......I do say no to getting up and chasing down a head hunger that I may have or my family.....it's hard and I have felt guilty in the past....but no more.....

I did have a craving for a Taco Bell taco about 6 weeks post op. I bought one and was shocked that the stupid taco was over $1 and when I actually took a bite. It was horrible.....the shell was stale and dry, and not much of anything in it. I have never had another thought about fast food since. I am appalled at it now. My adult children love to eat out all the time and I'm watching them gain weight from it too. They know it, but still can't stop buying it. It really saddens me to the core, but it's their choice and I have no control over that..... So for the rambling........:P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Great thread.

Fucked no is an acceptable response...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There's another concept here…that is that the only person who can really sabotage your weight loss efforts is you.

I'm the main cook and bottle washer for my family. My husband is appealing a decision by the insurance company against weight loss surgery, but has been a little crazy with the kids since that point.

Look, just because someone orders pizza doesn't mean you have to eat it. Or even stay in the house while they do. Just because your husband wants Del Taco at 8 doesn't mean you have to drive him there. And yes, I TOTALLY get that you don't want him driving impaired. On the other hand, you're not the boss of him. If you see the first 2-3 pages of the Enabling thread, before it jumps the shark, these behaviors are what got us all to the point of WLS.

There's nothing that is harder at first than saying no to the people you love. My husband in particular is a pouter if everything is not just so. He also pouts that I have "gotten a jump on him" in WLS, and complains about how unfair it is. But I refuse to let that influence me off the path I have chosen.

Marfar, I know you're working through all this. But saying no to yourself is also important. Substitute! Make the drive but don't order something. Or, have your excuse ready and stick to your guns. The other night I was asked by a bunch of friends to go out and have a drink. I was just recently cleared for alcohol in very small amounts and I really enjoy the odd cocktail here or there. But I hadn't had a drink yet since surgery and I knew it wouldn't be putting me in an ideal situation. I said no, but it wasn't easy because I got the whole, "Oh, come on! One drink with us. It'll be fun! You've worked so hard." It's like they were the voices in my head. But I left. And it really wasn't hard to not have a drink when I was home and in a situation that I control. You know?

I know it sucks to be in a situation that you need to weigh the long term outcome vs the short term "benefits" but it is a muscle like any other and it needs to be exercised in order for it to work properly. We fatties are brilliant at ignoring the long term in favor of gratification. But we can change. And unfortunately, that change often needs to happen in spite of what is going on around us, or who supports us.

I guess you can say I'm weak and he knows this so he preying on my weakness, especially when some time has passed and i'm most vulnerable because of extreme irritability from not being allowed to eat foods that I do enjoy. I'm working on that, I am, but I still need him to *support* me, not break me down.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×