My Dr. Says If I Gain 1 More Pound I Will Be Given An Extra Month Visit But....

[PdxMan 4,292]

... Plus why be this big when I barely eat and my doctor agreed totally and signed me right up saying this would help.

I haven't been eating the best foods for me which is how I got into the habit of eating less because I couldn't seem to stick with the good for me foods.

Maybe I was unclear somewhere but I was eating a lot in one sitting...I didn't just get fat, I've been fat but that happened over many years of large portions and the mindset given as a child to always clear my plate and late night eating and sweets as Snacks...

I don't know if there was judging or not, but I know I'm sure confused ... I think the bottom line, though, is there has been a history of an unhealthy relationship with food.

Would that be correct or oversimplifying?

I think the posts asking why she needed the surgery if she doesn't eat that much were also confused by these statements I quoted. But as has been pointed out, what does eating too much really mean? As Butter and Cheri point out, and what other WLS patients with some time under their belt discover, the body truly requires far less food than I ever imagined. We are all different. We have different health issues and take different medications. All these leave can leave our metabolisms messed up and those who have limited activity have these issues compound.

The guy who sits next to me eats non-stop at his desk. I'm not kidding. The dude never stops eating. He is a rail while the guy across from me rides his bike into work everyday 10 miles each way. Rides on the weekends. He has his lunch which is always healthy portions and type, yet he is morbidly obese. Now, is this a front he puts up and goes home and binges on crap all night? Perhaps, but I doubt it. How can the person next to me eat no less than 4,000 calories a day and be a rail while the guy across seems to do everything right, yet is morbidly obese?

So, overeating, IMO, is consuming more than your body needs to fuel itself while maintaining a proper metabolism. Finding that balance is the key. The sleeve has helped me do that. Not eating is not part of that equation as it throws your metabolism off. I do believe my mind is a scary place to be and to trust myself, early out, would be a practice in sabotage. I could not trust myself to make the right decisions. I needed help.

[gamergirl 4,609]

The guy who sits next to me eats non-stop at his desk. I'm not kidding. The dude never stops eating. He is a rail while the guy across from me rides his bike into work everyday 10 miles each way. Rides on the weekends. He has his lunch which is always healthy portions and type, yet he is morbidly obese. Now, is this a front he puts up and goes home and binges on crap all night? Perhaps, but I doubt it. How can the person next to me eat no less than 4,000 calories a day and be a rail while the guy across seems to do everything right, yet is morbidly obese?

That guy of yours who eats constantly? I'm surrounded by people like that. Skinny people who ate all their food and then ate half of mine--and also weighed half as much as me. It was the reason for almost all the rage and anger I had about my weight.

It isn't fair. Yes, that old chestnut. It isn't fair how some people can eat so much and not gain weight while if i simply thought of cake, it made it's way straight to my hips.

I had to get over that before I was willing to consider surgery.

[AmandaRaeLeo 2,145]

Holy moly this thread is alarming!

Denial is not just a river in Egypt...

[clk 3,519]

Yes.

I get it.

We all must have gotten fat the same way. And since all of our bodies, metabolisms, stress levels, and co-morbids are all the same, too, we must all lose and gain by the same magic formula.

And my doctors were all right, too. I should have been losing weight the same way they tell everyone to lose weight. But I wasn't, so it was my fault and I was in denial.

Thanks for clearing that up for me, I was confused. All those years of failed diets and it turns out everyone that told me it was my fault was right. Whew, what relief I feel knowing I'm just a failure and deluded instead of actually having a problem that WLS could help me fix!

By that measure, I suppose that since I can control my binge eating everyone else can do it, too, so people that don't are just wrong for being different. It's one thing not to understand someone's behaviors or particular issues and to voice it. It's another thing entirely to come out and say, "anyone that does X is delusional or in denial."

Hey, for people that love to finger point and complain about us vs. them, you sure spend a lot of time making people feel isolated, calling them liars or delusional and doing the opposite of being supportive.

Give yourselves some pats on the back there for doing a great job at alienating people.

And some of you have in the past taken ME to task for vents that might make people feel they shouldn't be honest or open here or come here to post questions and gain support.

This entire site lately has become a mess of people that seem to feel it's their duty to jump in and dictate that everything from mental well being to diet to the causes of obesity are all from one cookie cutter mold and that if you're not doing things one way, you're clearly wrong. And heaven forbid you're proud of your accomplishments and actually post about it - it might make someone else that's not reached the same goals yet or who might never reach those goals feel insecure. And for some reason, that's not okay behavior.

Color me confused.

I invite debate and I invite other views because I'm able to civilly carry on a conversation even when I disagree completely with the other party.

I don't then take my frustration over to an entirely new thread, start bashing people, calling them delusional, talking about how they're sabotaging everyone else by being different, complaining that they do things differently and spin up another thread that *GASP* does exactly what I've complained about before: divides people.

You people suck. That's divisive - you've managed to make people feel unwelcome or unwilling to be here. Great job.

~Cheri

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Sigh...

[No game 14,436]

Cheri, I was mean with that comment to you and you are right... I am sorry.

It was me joking but it was mean joking..

I know that we all have different stories.

I know that our metabolisms are screwed up. A lot of us bingers are no strangers to starvation diets.

And it has definitely affected my ability to lose weight.

This thread for me was about taking SOME personal responsibility though. We can never truly heal if we don't..

[soocalchic 1,087]

Cheri, I was mean with that comment to you and you are right... I am sorry. It was me joking but it was mean joking.. I know that we all have different stories. I know that our metabolisms are screed up. A lot of us bingers are no strangers to starvation diets. And it has definitely affected my ability to lose weight. This thread for me was about taking SOME personal responsibility though. We can never truly heal if we don't..

Amen

[KeeWee 470]

Hate to break it to u but not everyone loses the hunger hormone. Some do. many don't. I got my hunger (true hunger, not acid like some day) on day 10. I'm hungry more often now than I was before, cuz I'm only able to eat a very small amt. I'm usually hungry again 2 hrs later. Ur gunna have to start eating more often than 2x a day otherwise ull literally starve.

Just wanted to warn u that u may not lose the Ghrelin. About 25% of Ghrelin (the hunger hormone they cut outa ur stomach) is made in the pancreas. My dr said it's perfectly normal to be either hungry or not. I'm bummed I'm in the hungry category...

Good luck!

Thanks for that info...I hope mine goes!! Lol

[KeeWee 470]

Cheri, I was mean with that comment to you and you are right... I am sorry.

It was me joking but it was mean joking..

I know that we all have different stories.

I know that our metabolisms are screwed up. A lot of us bingers are no strangers to starvation diets.

And it has definitely affected my ability to lose weight.

This thread for me was about taking SOME personal responsibility though. We can never truly heal if we don't..

Absolutely. We all should be responsible for our own issues..yours are not mine and mine are not urs. From what my doc told me, I was drinking my calories. I'd rather drink then eat most times and never ever drank Water. So I understood...I gained..but now I'm doing what my doctor, my nutritionist and I feel will help.

It seems like ppl on here want to make accusations that we all do the same things. I've never been a binge eater but its obvious some ppl are and I feel like until I say I'm just like them, then there will continue to be these types of responses. But I'm still not...makes me no better by far..but still different. That should be ok..

[gamergirl 4,609]

Absolutely. We all should be responsible for our own issues..yours are not mine and mine are not urs. From what my doc told me, I was drinking my calories. I'd rather drink then eat most times and never ever drank Water. So I understood...I gained..but now I'm doing what my doctor, my nutritionist and I feel will help.

It seems like ppl on here want to make accusations that we all do the same things. I've never been a binge eater but its obvious some ppl are and I feel like until I say I'm just like them, then there will continue to be these types of responses. But I'm still not...makes me no better by far..but still different. That should be ok..

So if I can share my own experience with you? Several years ago, I too weighed a lot from eating the wrong things and then decided to eat only one meal a day and starve myself. I too hated food because all it did was make me fat.

My trainer and nutritionist made me eat 5 times a day. And I immediately put on weight. I was terrified. I wanted to go back to eating once a day because although I wasn't losing weight, at least that way I wasn't gaining weight. They both reassured me the weight would come off if I kept eating small meals. And it did, although very slowly.

I too worried that the surgery would not help me because I was eating 800 calories, starving myself and still not losing weight.

So I can relate to a lot of what you are saying. I won't tell you to disobey your NUT or your Doctor. But I will urge you to put your concerns before them, tell them that you are following their orders, and are now putting ON weight, and worried this will disqualify you from your surgery.

They are there to help you. Reach out to them, and get the help you need from them. They want you to be successful. Just ask for help, they will meet you half-way.

[No game 14,436]

Absolutely. We all should be responsible for our own issues..yours are not mine and mine are not urs. From what my doc told me, I was drinking my calories. I'd rather drink then eat most times and never ever drank Water. So I understood...I gained..but now I'm doing what my doctor, my nutritionist and I feel will help. It seems like ppl on here want to make accusations that we all do the same things. I've never been a binge eater but its obvious some ppl are and I feel like until I say I'm just like them, then there will continue to be these types of responses. But I'm still not...makes me no better by far..but still different. That should be ok..

When you post here the only thing we can draw from are from the words that you write.

[No game 14,436]

From what my doc told me, I was drinking my calories. I'd rather drink then eat most times and never ever drank Water. So I understood...I gained..but now I'm doing what my doctor, my nutritionist and I feel will help.

Forgive me gamer., but I'm assuming that she has since figured out she was drinking her calories. Since this was not mentioned in any of her older posts this might be part of the puzzle as to why some people can not eat but still gain?

[KeeWee 470]

Yes.

I get it.

We all must have gotten fat the same way. And since all of our bodies, metabolisms, stress levels, and co-morbids are all the same, too, we must all lose and gain by the same magic formula.

And my doctors were all right, too. I should have been losing weight the same way they tell everyone to lose weight. But I wasn't, so it was my fault and I was in denial.

Thanks for clearing that up for me, I was confused. All those years of failed diets and it turns out everyone that told me it was my fault was right. Whew, what relief I feel knowing I'm just a failure and deluded instead of actually having a problem that WLS could help me fix!

By that measure, I suppose that since I can control my binge eating everyone else can do it, too, so people that don't are just wrong for being different. It's one thing not to understand someone's behaviors or particular issues and to voice it. It's another thing entirely to come out and say, "anyone that does X is delusional or in denial."

Hey, for people that love to finger point and complain about us vs. them, you sure spend a lot of time making people feel isolated, calling them liars or delusional and doing the opposite of being supportive.

Give yourselves some pats on the back there for doing a great job at alienating people.

And some of you have in the past taken ME to task for vents that might make people feel they shouldn't be honest or open here or come here to post questions and gain support.

This entire site lately has become a mess of people that seem to feel it's their duty to jump in and dictate that everything from mental well being to diet to the causes of obesity are all from one cookie cutter mold and that if you're not doing things one way, you're clearly wrong. And heaven forbid you're proud of your accomplishments and actually post about it - it might make someone else that's not reached the same goals yet or who might never reach those goals feel insecure. And for some reason, that's not okay behavior.

Color me confused.

I invite debate and I invite other views because I'm able to civilly carry on a conversation even when I disagree completely with the other party.

I don't then take my frustration over to an entirely new thread, start bashing people, calling them delusional, talking about how they're sabotaging everyone else by being different, complaining that they do things differently and spin up another thread that *GASP* does exactly what I've complained about before: divides people.

You people suck. That's divisive - you've managed to make people feel unwelcome or unwilling to be here. Great job.

~Cheri

Take a bow, couldn't have said it better...my mom is more upset then me but she's pissed saying "and that's where u wanna go for encouragement and advice" I have noticed the trend of calling people delusional and in denial, also telling their story as if its the obeseity anthem but your story is yours and mine is mine..I'm not here to lie, u were once in my shoes with different laces, its ok to disagree with what I say but remember how delicate this topic is for some. I came out my shell to talk to peers...plz don't make people retreat!

[gamergirl 4,609]

Forgive me gamer., but I'm assuming that she has since figured out she was drinking her calories. Since this was not mentioned in any of her older posts this might be part of the puzzle as to why some people can not eat but still gain?

yes it's definitely possible.I think the advice about logging everything, and consulting with her docs to figure out what was going on was dead on. Those things help us all don't they?

[KeeWee 470]

Forgive me gamer., but I'm assuming that she has since figured out she was drinking her calories. Since this was not mentioned in any of her older posts this might be part of the puzzle as to why some people can not eat but still gain?

Yes today was visit 4 of 6. My nutritionist explained that to me when we discussed my daily intake and changes made from then til now...I lost instead of gaining and she was proud knowing how hard it was for me but my game changer has been...absolutely nothing but water!! I was happy to notice that such a small change could make such a huge difference. I actually feel better with that coupled with no cigarettes. Baby steps...