Today was a rough day an my eyes burn from crying for hours. 7 months ago my primary doctor suggested I check out Lapband surgery. I never thought it before because I thought it was a cop out but at 300 lbs, back pain, knee pain and a sad future looking forward gaining weight

when I choose to have children.

I decided to start on the path of Lapband and within a week I met with the surgeon, physical therapy, therapist and nutritionist. Everyone said I'm a great candidate for Lapband and just had a few changes to make I.e work out more. So I changed my diet and tried to work out more but working full time and going to nursing school made it all very difficult. Throughout the months I met with the dietitian and she said I was on track and said I needed one more appt with the higher up people and there shouldn't be a problem thinking I would have surgery during Xmas break. I met with these higher people and they proceeded to tell me I am no longer qualified for the Lapband because my bmi was 1.5 points over the max. No one ever told

me there was a max so I was very disappointed. They told me I would be better fit for the sleeve and I should start looking into that. So they made a follow up with the dietitian and another with a dietitian for sleeve diet education. I had an appt with my primary doc who put me on an appetite suppressant which worked great. I lost 14 lbs in 2 weeks. Today I had my follow up with the dietitian which went great for the first half. Then she attacked. She went on and on about how I don't have time for this surgery and because of my work and school schedule there doesn't seem to be much time to make sure I eat right and get to the gym. She said I need to reevaluate life and make myself first. She said maybe after school would be better. I informed her that is two years away. So after 7 months and thousands of dollars later and dozens of appointments she was telling me to give up. I told her I wanted to have the surgery now because I want kids after school and she let me know that I can't have kids until 2 years after the sleeve so I would be well into my 30s before that happened. She said I seems to be doing everything right I just don't have the time. She told me no doc would preform the surgery with a bmi over 45 but no one ever told me that because my bmi hasn't been under 45 in years. She said she was sorry that they lied to me and lead me to believe all of this. I balled right there in her office for 30 mins and I walked out. So here I am still fat, feeling like a failure and no weight loss in sight..... It's been a very bad day.

I don't think she was bluffing.... She cancelled all my future appointments. I'm going to call the doc office but I think I need a few days to breathe

And thanks everyone for helping me through this

She didn't say my bmi was too high for the Sleeve she said it was too high for the band. She said I can't get the sleeve because I don't have enough time to devote to it with being in school and working full time.

This is frustrating to hear. But don't let it get you down, talk to the surgeon they are the ulitimate decision maker in this situation. I work full time, I'm in Grad school, and have kids and a husband. You have plenty of time to take care of yourself, what you don't have time for is listening to dinks that have no idea what you are going through. Complain, complain, complain

I don't think she was bluffing.... She cancelled all my future appointments. I'm going to call the doc office but I think I need a few days to breathe

I don't think she was bluffing.... She cancelled all my future appointments. I'm going to call the doc office but I think I need a few days to breathe

wow...what a bi-otch!! She sounds horrid...I hope you can take your hurt and disappointment and shape it into a blazing hot fire brand of determination...and then shove it right in her face! Don't give up, one person should not be the say all/do all in your choice to better your life!

Who the hell is she to say WHEN you should have WLS!!! I hate people like this - way too judgmental and she's full of crap too. I'm getting sleeved - BMI is 51. Talk to your surgeon. Find another NUT cuz she's NUTZ.

Who are you going through for this surgery? Does that dietician work for your surgeon? She full of sh*t. If you're going through some ridiculous weight loss center look up bariatric surgeons in your area and go through one of them.

The way my surgeon works is with a team so this dietitian is part of that team so I can't just go find a new one. And this was the 3rd dietitian in this team I have seen. The first one I have been working with for 6 months then she passed me off to like her supervisor which was this one I meet with yesterday. I was suppose to meet with the 1st one nov 9 but this dietitian said they were going to cancel that appt and talk about me at the next team meeting and see what the team wants to do with me.

So she's stated her opinion. She doesn't think you have time to devote to successful weight loss after a sleeve. Now it's your turn to state YOUR opinion. You are informed, committed, and ready to move forward. Since you know yourself considerably better than she does, your opinion is the one that matters. You got to this point with the input from your physician. How dare they second guess the both of you. Stand up strong against this woman. She's wrong and you know what you want!! Tell her and the rest of the team this is right for you.

Sorry to hear about all your problems Bel12...I hope you can get an appointment with the doctor to see what he/she has to say. Just remember you can do anything you put your mind to...don't let a nutty NUT be an obstacle to a healthier lifestyle for yourself.....good luck!

She didn't say my bmi was too high for the Sleeve she said it was too high for the band. She said I can't get the sleeve because I don't have enough time to devote to it with being in school and working full time.

That is a load of hooey. I work full time. I often have to travel for work and and don't get home until late in the evening or stay in hotels, and I'm working on my doctorate. I also have an active social life with friends, family, and a boyfriend. Is she a nutritionist or a dietitian? If she has a certification or license, she very likely has a professional Code of Ethics and Responsibility, such as: http://www.cncb.org/CCN%20Code%20of%20Ethics.pdf

which she has likely violated.

It sounds like a case of misfeasance or malfeasance to me.

It's very hard to get a second opinion My Heath insurance is through the hospital where i work. I tried to go to a different hospital but my insurance said they wouldn't cover it if it wasn't through my hospital.

I think you need to contact the doctor. The doctor is the only one who should be making this call.

I'm so sorry to hear about this bad experience. I have a BMI of 45 and my surgeon said I could go with lap band or sleeve.

I saw that you said you had to use this surgeon because your insurance only covers surgeons at the hospital where you work. I don't want to say they're being unethical, but is there a possibility that they're discouraging the surgery because they don't want to pay or interfere with your job?

Ive read about some Bariatric centers that don't really try to get your surgery approved with insurance. They just go through the motions so they get paid from insurance for your visits.

Please contact your insurance and ask them directly what their qualifications are for WLS and which providers are covered. If you meet/complete their qualifications then a NUT's opinion means nothing.

Also, is the surgeon board certified for bariatrics? You can check online.

In my experiences I've learned you have to fight sometimes for what's best for you. We have an eating problem. Over the years I e spent lots of time at the gym, but it didnt do any good because I still couldn't control my eating. I eat too much and that's what I need help with. And no body should be judged for needing help and asking for it. Your doctors and specialists should be proud of you and want to help. That's why they went into their professions.

Please don't give up. And don't wait, you're risking psyching yourself out. You deserve to be happy and healthy.

I am confused. My BMI was 52 and I am certainly not the heaviest sleever.

You are lucky to have dodged the lapband bullet though - they don't work well and especially not for people with a little higher BMI.

It does take a lot of work to comply with the eating guidelines, I don't know what to tell you about that. I know that people who have zero time do this, but i had to rearrange my life to make room for working out etc.

Wow. That is so messed up! You totally will have time to eat right and go to gym... Even if you don't go to gym you'll find little ways here And there to get more physical exercise in.. Like walking during lunch break, parking further away, Etc.

My bmi at time of surgery was 62.4 (I was 5 ft 5 in and 375 pounds). My bmi was never in question.. It was never even brought up that it might be too high...

You need to find a different and more supportive doctor, or maybe consider going to Mexico and doing self pay. I hear they are great down there and don't care Bout bmis

I wish you the best of luck, and don't give up. You just happened to be stuck with those bad doctors first, but there are many better ones out there!

I am confused. My BMI was 52 and I am certainly not the heaviest sleever.

You are lucky to have dodged the lapband bullet though - they don't work well and especially not for people with a little higher BMI.

It does take a lot of work to comply with the eating guidelines' date=' I don't know what to tell you about that. I know that people who have zero time do this, but i had to rearrange my life to make room for working out etc.[/quote']

They rejected me for the Lapband bc my bmi was too high they rejected me from sleeve bc I don't have time to devote to it

You are the only one who can decide if you have the time to do this or not. Sure you're going to have to learn to take 20 minutes to eat one scrambled egg, but you are the only one who can figure out how to make your sleeve fit into your lifestyle. No one else. My PCP said that a few of the nurses in her department have had bariatric surgery. So it's not like they turn down all health care professionals becuase of their busy schedules.

Here's what I would do if I were you: 1) Call the surgeon's office and make an appointment to see him/her, specifically to discuss the nutritionist's comments and your tight schedule. 2) Take a support person with you to that appointment (and the rest of your appointments) so they can also hear what they have to say. A second set of ears can't hurt. If you don't have a support person, buy a digital recorder so you can go back over the conversation word for word. 3) Call your insurance and find out your options for the location of the surgery. Maybe there is another affiliated hospital you can look in to. 4) Go see that [horrible] nutritionist again (with your support person or digital recorder) and talk to her again about why she isn't approving you. Maybe she was having a bad day and maybe you misunderstood her because you were upset. It wouldn't hurt to follow up with her.

I can tell by reading your posts how upset you are, which you have every right to be. But this isn't the end for you. Be persistant, annoy the crap out of them until they give you an answer or agree to meet with you again. If it were me, I would have filed a complaint with the hospital so quick it would have made that stick-figure nutritionist's head spin. You don't have to let them treat you this way. It's possible you have legal recourse for the fees that you've paid thus far if they deny you the surgery, especially because you are employed by the hospital. Perhaps a phonecall to HR wouldn't hurt either. Hang in there. You don't have to take no for an answer.