I have a question. Do I need to have my husband with me the day of the surgery? Look like my surgery would be around 3:30pm till 5:45pm ( not sure just approximate time)

How long after that I would spend in the recovery room? Do I need my husband to be their? because he need to take care of 3 kids and if he need to be their we need to find someone to sit with kids.

because right now we are thinking that he would just wait the call from the doctor how the surgery went and he would see me next morning. But I am scared a bit to be alone in the recovery room.

Any Advice? Am I selfish?

You aren't required to have someone there, but it's nice. Can he just come see you after you get to your room? That way the kids are only left with someone for a short time? In most hospitals, he won't be able to see you until you go to your room. And no, you aren't being selfish, this is YOUR day.

I am going through the same thing as you. I too have 3 children and my husband will have to take care of them while i am in the hospital. I am praying that i dont have any complications because i need to be home with my babies. My sister is going to stay with me the 1st night that i am in the hospital. My husband will stay home. I figure i should be good the 2nd night as i wont be on the meds so heavily. I hope!!

You're not being selfish.

When I woke up from surgery, they whisked me right into my hospital room. There was really no time spent in Recovery. I don't know what other's experience was, though. If he can't be there and you are frightened, could you call and talk to him from your hospital room?

It would b nice to have someone there with u. But in all reality he can't b with u in the operating room anyhow and ur not in the recovery room for long, if its not possible to have him there in the waiting room though, u can probably arrange child care for after the surgery so he can go b with u for a few hours after...Good luck! )

keepin it real

I actually didn't find I was up for much company- I was really groggy, on morphine, and kind of just wanted to sleep. I don't think it will be terrible not to have your husband there if he needs to be with the kids. I mostly just dozed.

My mum took me in as I had to be there at 9am we all did everyone having surgery that day we all get assigned a bed and given gowns and what not and change then its all the pre op people coming to speak to you and you go down when its your time.

For me I was last on the list it was like 7pm I went down.

So for me mum stayed till I changed and saw some people told when my time slot was and she left taking everything with her I don’t like to leave anything for them to take and be with me after.

Did that with my gall bladder op my case and bag never got to my bed till 3 hours after I was on ward so this time she took everything.

I know I wasn’t awake a lot in recovery it was too hot and making me drowsy mum sat outside recovery for about a hour and half they were not letting anyone come into recovery so she saw me when they finally wheeled my bed out to the ward she followed I was high on pain beds it was around 11 maybe 11:30pm I made her help me change into my clothes not the hospital gown I went loo to pee got back in bed said night and she was off.

So no point in spending the whole day there.

She never spent the whole day there for my gall bladder op either I know it’s not my husband or partner but it works out the same they just sit and wait if they are close enough we live about 30misn away from the hospital in a car they can ring and let you know your out they still don’t let people in recovery so they have to wait till your on ward to come see you and only if its visiting time.

I worked in surgery for 18 years & it was always preferable to have the spouse or family member at the hospital until the person was taken to their room. The reason is if (hopefully not) there are complications, someone that can speak for you is available. As you can imagine, my mind played back all the complications we had encountered & as I am a widow knew I could not have my spouse there.

I had a friend that is a nurse there & she saw me through to my room, made sure I could work the PCA & left.

Could your sister stay with the kids until your husband sees you in your room & then trade places? Best of luck & this is NOT being selfish at all.

I think its nice to wake up and see your husband or mom or a friend there. IMO.

I think he should at least stay until he is able to speak with the doctor and make sure you're okay. Once you get to your room, he can come in, give you a kiss and go take care of the children if he needs to. Hopefully you can just find someone who will watch the children for at least a few hours.

He should be there before during and after surgery. Honestly you have to rethink your child care if he can't be away thet long. When you are not lucid they are your lifeline. You would be a fool to go into surgery without one! Anyone, but SOMEONE.

I cannot imagine going into surgery without someone there- especially my husband. The only time I had surgery before this was when I had my thyroid removed. All my friends surprised me and came to the hospital that morning to be with me and I had about 10 friends waiting for me when I got back. It pissed the nurses off! But it was a comfort to me to have my friends ( a couple spent the night) because I was sick as a dog from nausea.

This isn't like having your tonsils out. This is major surgery, and though the risks are low they are not non-existant. My wife arranged to have someone watch our boys so she could be there because if anything went south the last place she wanted to be was somewhere else when that happened. Everything went according to plan, but she was terrific support while I was in my feeble state for a few days. She was especially helpful with monitoring fluid outputs for the 1st day, which saved me a lot of embarrassing situations in the bathroom, not to mention just getting there and back to my bed. I don't want a stranger with me in those situations - things are tough enough that first 24-hrs.

Thank you everyone. My husband always was with me during any procedure, but he hate waiting.... ( I think he is just scared himself but doesn't admit this). I need to come up with kids care plan and I already told him that he would be with me because I want him to....

I would get someone to sit with kids until you're in your room for a little while if possible. It is nice to have someone there just in case...And for support...

My husband was halfway around the world working when I had my surgery, but my parents were there during and after the surgery. My brother came and stayed the night that night when my parents left. Support is extremely important. I was in pain and the nausea was horrendous! I never vomited, just constant terrible heaving and nausea. It was very nice that there was someone there just to hand me a cold cloth to lay over my neck and wipe my mouth, call for the nurse if needed, cheer me on when it was time to walk when all I wanted to do was sleep. You really should consider having someone there before, during, and after the procedure. Before the procedure you will need the emotional support because its possible you will be nervous.