Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

BariatricPal

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Join BariatricPal free

  • Ask your own questions
  • Reply and follow topics
  • Message other members
  • No cost, no spam

What Was Your Final "straw That Broke The Camels Back"

  • Popular Post

What was the final thing that you encountered that made you say this is enough? I have had numerous.

1. Leaving a wife and 2 sons, Husbandless and fatherless.

2. Not being able to get on amusement park rides with my sons.

3. Not being able to take my wife to a concert, because i could not fit in a seat.

4. Avoiding restuarant,movie theaters and sports complexes with tiny seats.

For me, walking through a a department store and some little child looking at me like im a alien had to be one the hardest things.

Respectfully,

Joe

  • Replies 1.5k
  • Views 234.8k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Featured Replies

  • Popular Post

I had several but outside of high blood pressure, knee problems on and on...the "final" was...my husband said he wanted me around with him in retirement. Our daughter had the band and lost 70 lbs, it was the first time he was open to surgery as an option, and I was no longer afraid. He was tired of seeing me lose weight only to regain year after year and my struggles with hurt and failure.

Someone said to me "How many morbidly obese senior citizens do you see?"

  • Popular Post

I would say my turn around was when I had my daughter. She will be turning 1 next week, and I wanted to extend my quality of life for her. Well, its for me too.... but most of all, I want her to have a happy and healthy mommy! HAPPY AND HEALTHY! I guess there are a few other things I look forward to like:

Fitting into an airplane seat comfortably.

Not having to ask everytime Im about to sit in a lawn chair... "Will that hold me?"

Not feeling like I take up so much space on a couch when I am at a party.

I guess I could go on... LOL

  • Popular Post

There were several issues over the years: painful knees, inability to travel without purchasing two seats, fear of sitting in unfamiliar seating when out, tired of always being the largest person in my social circle and so on but the final straw was....I broke my queen sized bed frame earlier this year. Alone. Most people break beds having fantastic sex with another party but not me, I sat on the bed and it gave up the ghost. A beautiful sleigh bed that I've had for over ten years was ruined. I was mortified and placed the mattresses on the floor within frame where they still reside. One day, when a decent amount of weight has been lost, I will purchase a new beautiful new bed and hopefully the memories of that day will finally be banished.

Sooo many reasons but my main one would be my son. He is my world and as he begins to walk an run and want to go and do I don't want I fade from participating in his life because I'm to tired or embarrassed or just not able to. After having him I hit my highest weight of 320. I don't want to stay this way. Or him remember me huffing and puffing up the stairs to our home. I also very much so want more kids and can't at my current weight it would be so unwise. My delivery was already complicated with my son and I weighed about 40 pounds less at time of delivery. So this I for my son.

I knew it was time for a major change when I found myself feeling as though I was watching the world go on around because I couldn't get up and move! I'm 32 years old, I live at home with my parents who support me..I do not have a job (who would want to hire someone who can't stand for more than a few seconds to minutes at a time..believe me I tried, I've had several interviews). I dropped out of nursing school right before clinical started because I knew I couldn't do the physical side of the job. I was basically watching my life slip away right before my eyes. I'm tired of being in pain, and I'm in pain every single day..if it's my back, hips, knees, feet and ankle to skin rashes. I'm always tired, and worn out. I'm carrying myself plus two other people on my body! Fearing my heart is going to go give out on me. I don't want to have to take medication for the rest of my life.

I really just want to start my life, to have one of my own! To be able to walk without being in pain, or out of breath or dreading it. To play with my nephews instead of just watching them from a chair. To go to Kings Island and ride the rides. To go to a concert and not worry about not having a place to sit because I won't fit. Or a local show and know I can go up close to the stage and stand and not be in pain. To go swimming and not have to wear regular clothes into the swimming pool, trying to pass them off as swimming clothes because I can't find any to fit me. The list goes on and on.

I haven't had the surgery yet. I am self pay, no insurance (I have no job), and I can't get financing (no job) I really wish my parents would help out some because the surgery would be life changing for me. They know this. But they feel trapped money wise too. I'm praying that something happens, a door opens, and I get some help. I never thought having surgery would be a dream of mine, and something I want so bad. But this is... because I know it will offer me life.

Like many of you I have had many events that made me want the surgery.

My kids said that the kids were making fun of me because of my weight

My body is in pain and tired and I need much more sleep than ever before

My blood tests didn't come back good (pre-diabetic, high cholesterol, etc)

I finally came to the conclusion that I'm just not strong enough to lose the weight AND keep it off (I've lost many times and it came back)

I'm starting to restrict the places I go based on weight (afraid of airplane seats, movie seats, etc) I've had people close to me die of heart problems recently

I wake up in the night because I stop breathing sometimes

etc etc.

This summer I went to a water-park and got a tube stuck around my waist. My kids couldn't help me so finally some man came to pull it off. I didn't dare even look at him. It was HORRIBLE :( I don't want to have any more experiences like that ever. I saw some other people, even chunky ladies, that had tubes around their waists with plenty of room to spare.

I can't wait to have the surgery already :)

Thankyou everyone for your stories! I'm so proud of y'all!!!

Umm, it was one straw for me but does need slight background- I was a pageant child, always the prettiest little girl, who got fat as a pre-teen. Bad diet, not really encouraged to exercise.

Finally decided I was old enough to go on a "diet" or "healthy eating plan" as it was beginning to be called. Became obsessed, lost all the weight and more and nearly died of anorexia. Oh and it started as a "whim to be slim" like my friends, but Ive never really had body confidence issues, I like the way I look, I don't mind my body physically and have always had luck with the opposite gender ;) I just fell in LOVE with the high of not eating, doing something everyday that no-one else could do- starve myself! I was quite good at it :(

Anyway, "Recovery" was kind of "easy" once i found the perfect dietician, but obviously my mind was still messed up. I thought "hey, I beat it, food no longer controls me!" I could eat whatever I "wanted". Needless to say I "kind of" exploded in size... About 100-110 pounds up to 200 in less than a year!!!

I tried to cut calories again but started having panic attacks and even suicidal thoughts. Started yo-yoing up and down until I hit 300 pounds.

I was delusional by then, I would just not eat for as long as possible then binge out of starvation. But I didn't compensate with laxatives or vomiting, I just moved on, and the cycle continued. People think I must love food, but most of those who know me well can see how I try to ignore that I'm eating. I pick cheap easy (ergo high cal) foods that can be consumed quickly with little thought involved...

Then the straw- I got aspiration pneumonia from a common cold. Went to sleep Wednesday and woke up Friday with tubes and needles everywhere. Bedridden for five more days and anything that was left of my core muscles went and my lumbar discs began to bulge.

Enter stage left- EXCRUCIATING pain all down lower leg and foot. Sledgehammers, needles, tourniquets cutting off feeling and blood supply... All of the above.

Asked doctor obvious question: is it my weight... Obvious answer: yup- lose it and it will go away but in the meantime here's a huge number of scarily addictive drugs to take...

I have psych, dietician, GP, physio, alternative therapist and partner's support this time but I'm still scared. Though not scared of the surgery per se, rather- will I mess this up too? Will I ever "get over" food?

It's been a few months now, lost 25 pounds pre-op, had a sort of bad week last week but am back on that sturdy old horse, 9 months until in ready for surgery and look out world!!!

Thanks for reading, I havent seen many people on here with "eating disorders" so I thought I'd share...

God bless.

Just had another breaking point....read a minute ago that MIchael Clarke Duncan died. He was 6'5 and weighed 300 pounds. Wait a minute, I WEIGH 300 POUNDS at 5'5. May he RIP but he was a big guy with big muscles.

Also, I was at my friends house and I picked up her bikini top as a joke and put it around my thigh and it wouldn't touch.... I probably did what we ALL do. Laughed and made a joke.

Does this even need further discussion?

  • Popular Post

I have 3 straws...

I was at my hair salon in November 2011 getting my hair colored and I went into the dressing room to put on a smock. None of them fit. I had to come back out of the dressing room and tell The stylist that they didn't fit. Next thing I know they are all looking throughout the salon for a clean smock that will fit. They couldn't find one so my stylist took his off and gave it to me (he's 6'3" and approx 240). I was 5'5" and 243. Needless to say I was so humiliated.

The next month I get a call from my dad who lives alone. He's 400 lbs and 6'3". He says he can't feel his legs (diabetic neuropathy). We go pick him up and he can barely walk. Then he falls at my house and he is so heavy that we can't help him up so we call an ambulance. It takes 3 large men to get him off the floor. Then it hits me. Watching my father in this state is what my little boy will be doing with me if I don't get things under control. I don't want to put him through what my siblings and I have gone through to get my father proper care. It was very eye opening.

In January, I start looking into WLS. This same month my little boy asks why we don't have any family photos. I made something up like I just liked taking pictures of him, but the reality is I never wanted my picture taken. This broke my heart. A few weeks into January and I run into a friend who had gastric sleeve surgery and she looked amazing. I decided that was Devine intervention a took the hint.

I had my 1st appt later that month and surgery in March. I still have problems with those darn smocks, but now its because they are too big for me. This has been the best decision I have ever made (outside of my marriage and my child of course)!

Thanks for reading.

My back surgery did not go as well as planned and inorder to fix my back I need to drop the weight. I have tried on my own and been unsuccessful at pretty much all I tried...I am hoping this tool will be the answer for me! I am so tired of being in pain and not wanting to go anywhere because I am embarrassed or in pain...It is time!!

  • Popular Post

Few reasons:

1. I have a bad knee due to breaking it several times. (The first time I broke it I was 12 and walked on it for about a week before I was taken to the hospital.)

2. My daughter. That being a big one, she loves going out and doing things. It's getting harder for me because of my injuries from a car accident and my weight compounding that issue.

3. Recently my fiance of 4 years (6'4 and almost 400 pounds) told me I was too fat for him and left us. Well recently left us, he always got on me about my weight.

4. I'm tired of being depressed and feeling completely hopeless about my weight. I don't want to sit around waiting to die.

Wow, so many familiar stories here! Mine was a compilation of so many of them over the years, but the final straw was when I got my height measured at my doc appt. I've been 5'8" forever. Last year it was 5'7.5" (could have been a mistake, I thought), and this year it was 5'7". I'm shrinking vertically. At the same weight, I'm getting fatter and have a higher BMI every year!

I knew it was time for a major change when I found myself feeling as though I was watching the world go on around because I couldn't get up and move! I'm 32 years old, I live at home with my parents who support me..I do not have a job (who would want to hire someone who can't stand for more than a few seconds to minutes at a time..believe me I tried, I've had several interviews). I dropped out of nursing school right before clinical started because I knew I couldn't do the physical side of the job. I was basically watching my life slip away right before my eyes. I'm tired of being in pain, and I'm in pain every single day..if it's my back, hips, knees, feet and ankle to skin rashes. I'm always tired, and worn out. I'm carrying myself plus two other people on my body! Fearing my heart is going to go give out on me. I don't want to have to take medication for the rest of my life.

I really just want to start my life, to have one of my own! To be able to walk without being in pain, or out of breath or dreading it. To play with my nephews instead of just watching them from a chair. To go to Kings Island and ride the rides. To go to a concert and not worry about not having a place to sit because I won't fit. Or a local show and know I can go up close to the stage and stand and not be in pain. To go swimming and not have to wear regular clothes into the swimming pool, trying to pass them off as swimming clothes because I can't find any to fit me. The list goes on and on.

I haven't had the surgery yet. I am self pay, no insurance (I have no job), and I can't get financing (no job) I really wish my parents would help out some because the surgery would be life changing for me. They know this. But they feel trapped money wise too. I'm praying that something happens, a door opens, and I get some help. I never thought having surgery would be a dream of mine, and something I want so bad. But this is... because I know it will offer me life.

You are in my prayers for a financial solution.

Thankyou everyone for your stories! I'm so proud of y'all!!!

Umm, it was one straw for me but does need slight background- I was a pageant child, always the prettiest little girl, who got fat as a pre-teen. Bad diet, not really encouraged to exercise.

Finally decided I was old enough to go on a "diet" or "healthy eating plan" as it was beginning to be called. Became obsessed, lost all the weight and more and nearly died of anorexia. Oh and it started as a "whim to be slim" like my friends, but Ive never really had body confidence issues, I like the way I look, I don't mind my body physically and have always had luck with the opposite gender ;) I just fell in LOVE with the high of not eating, doing something everyday that no-one else could do- starve myself! I was quite good at it :(

Anyway, "Recovery" was kind of "easy" once i found the perfect dietician, but obviously my mind was still messed up. I thought "hey, I beat it, food no longer controls me!" I could eat whatever I "wanted". Needless to say I "kind of" exploded in size... About 100-110 pounds up to 200 in less than a year!!!

I tried to cut calories again but started having panic attacks and even suicidal thoughts. Started yo-yoing up and down until I hit 300 pounds.

I was delusional by then, I would just not eat for as long as possible then binge out of starvation. But I didn't compensate with laxatives or vomiting, I just moved on, and the cycle continued. People think I must love food, but most of those who know me well can see how I try to ignore that I'm eating. I pick cheap easy (ergo high cal) foods that can be consumed quickly with little thought involved...

Then the straw- I got aspiration pneumonia from a common cold. Went to sleep Wednesday and woke up Friday with tubes and needles everywhere. Bedridden for five more days and anything that was left of my core muscles went and my lumbar discs began to bulge.

Enter stage left- EXCRUCIATING pain all down lower leg and foot. Sledgehammers, needles, tourniquets cutting off feeling and blood supply... All of the above.

Asked doctor obvious question: is it my weight... Obvious answer: yup- lose it and it will go away but in the meantime here's a huge number of scarily addictive drugs to take...

I have psych, dietician, GP, physio, alternative therapist and partner's support this time but I'm still scared. Though not scared of the surgery per se, rather- will I mess this up too? Will I ever "get over" food?

It's been a few months now, lost 25 pounds pre-op, had a sort of bad week last week but am back on that sturdy old horse, 9 months until in ready for surgery and look out world!!!

Thanks for reading, I havent seen many people on here with "eating disorders" so I thought I'd share...

God bless.

Thank you for sharing your story. I will pray for you that you can wrap your arms around this with your medical team. It will be hard work, but you can do it! Great job on your 25 lb loss already! Keep up the good work. Nine months will pass by in a flash (that's about how long I had to wait when all was said and done) Keep us posted! :)

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.