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What If People Treat Me Better As A Thin Person? It Would Make Me So Angry!

I was raised to always take people as they come, and to think about a person's kindness or intelligence before I think about the way they look.

We've all encountered people out there who are prejudiced and bigoted against those who are big-bodied, but what happens when those same people all of a sudden fall all over themselves to talk to you, get to know you, hook up with you, etc., just because you're thin?

I dislike prejudice of any kind, even when I'm on the "positive" end of someone's prejudice.

Those of you who have lost weight, have you noticed a positive difference in the way you've been treated in public? By waiters and waitresses, by shop assistants in clothing shops, by people on the bus, people at school or work? How do you keep yourself from resenting them for it?

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  • AnewMe@28
    AnewMe@28

    Omg, I have had this conversation with my hubby several times, I thought I was just trippin. I have noticed people, men especially seemingly breaking their necks to be nice or help me. At my job I

  • Oh, yeah, I'm seeing a difference in the way people treat me. Big time! I just accept it for what it is, because most of them don't even realize they're doing it, IMO. I have enough other things to

  • thats a thought of mine too..i have yet to be sleeved but im wondering how others are going to act once i cross onto the losers bench..as of right now on my facebook i dont have a picture of my as my

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I havent noticed any difference in the way I'm treated, except by those around me. They keep telling me how great I look and how proud of me they are. Those are the only people that matter anyway, right?

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Oh, yeah, I'm seeing a difference in the way people treat me. Big time! I just accept it for what it is, because most of them don't even realize they're doing it, IMO. I have enough other things to worry about without getting angry at them for being exactly what society has programmed them to be.

Just enjoy yourself can't change the world

Sent from my SPH-D700 using VST

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thats a thought of mine too..i have yet to be sleeved but im wondering how others are going to act once i cross onto the losers bench..as of right now on my facebook i dont have a picture of my as my profile pic..what i do have is a sign that says *under construction check back soon* haha..my motto is *if you weren't there at my worst you don't deserve me at my best*

I read about that in this book about the subject and it really bothered me. I'm a very friendly person and for the most part I talk to people in public and always have conversations with them. But, since I turned 40 (well into 40's now) I noticed the "invisibility factor." I had heard about it and never thought it would happen to me. Sometimes I feel ignored and I know it's not my personality. I do think there is a prejudice against "older" women and heavy people. Yep, I think if I knew--- but how will we??? it would definitely make me angry.

Funny, I almost posted the same thing recently.

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I lost 100 pounds through diet and exercise before and people did treat me differently when I was smaller. I think, however, that it was only partly because I looked better and the other part was that I acted different. I walked with confidence and looked people in the eye and smiled more than I do when I am large. People respond to confidence.

I have noticed a difference!! I feel like people take me more seriously when I speak. If I don't style my hair or wear makeup (even when I do it is always very minimal, but apparently its makes a difference) or wear my glasses... apparently I look like im still in my teens. It honestly sucks sometimes. BUT, now that i've lost the weight it doesn't happen nearly as often.

I have noticed that waiters/etc treat me slightly better now. Or its more that they are less "by the book" professional. Does that make sense? Still professional, but it doesn't feel forced.

I wonder a lot whether it is me who has changed personality wise. I am more confident and I don't feel pressured to make up for anything when I'm speaking (i didn't realize I felt this way, until it went away). So it could be that the change is because i'm happier and more confident and the people I interact with respond to that.

I'm tracking observations of people's reactions as I lose weight. Curious to see the way different people act.

  • Author

thats a thought of mine too..i have yet to be sleeved but im wondering how others are going to act once i cross onto the losers bench..as of right now on my facebook i dont have a picture of my as my profile pic..what i do have is a sign that says *under construction check back soon* haha..my motto is *if you weren't there at my worst you don't deserve me at my best*

That's pretty much how I feel about it, too!

  • Author

I have noticed a difference!! I feel like people take me more seriously when I speak. If I don't style my hair or wear makeup (even when I do it is always very minimal, but apparently its makes a difference) or wear my glasses... apparently I look like im still in my teens. It honestly sucks sometimes. BUT, now that i've lost the weight it doesn't happen nearly as often.

I have noticed that waiters/etc treat me slightly better now. Or its more that they are less "by the book" professional. Does that make sense? Still professional, but it doesn't feel forced.

I wonder a lot whether it is me who has changed personality wise. I am more confident and I don't feel pressured to make up for anything when I'm speaking (i didn't realize I felt this way, until it went away). So it could be that the change is because i'm happier and more confident and the people I interact with respond to that.

That's a good point--confidence means a heck of a lot, and happiness is infectious! Great thoughts!

  • Author

I read about that in this book about the subject and it really bothered me. I'm a very friendly person and for the most part I talk to people in public and always have conversations with them. But, since I turned 40 (well into 40's now) I noticed the "invisibility factor." I had heard about it and never thought it would happen to me. Sometimes I feel ignored and I know it's not my personality. I do think there is a prejudice against "older" women and heavy people. Yep, I think if I knew--- but how will we??? it would definitely make me angry.

Funny, I almost posted the same thing recently.

My husband asked what my biggest fear was about life after the surgery, and this was it. It's good to know that someone else has thought about it too. I guess I kind of lived in that "invisible" zone pre-op. It is going to take some getting used to!

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I have been treated differently at work.

It's kind of strange, some folks are so much nicer since Ive lost almost 45 pounds, but I have also noticed some of my so called friends are acting not so nice. Either way, doesn't matter to me in the least. I'm doing this for me and only me.

Not to impress anyone. But if it happens to attract a handsome guy sling the way

I wont be too upset, LOL!

Good Luck and hold your head up high, every body is beautiful, in their own way!!

Sent from my iPhone using VST

I have been treated differently at work.

It's kind of strange' date=' some folks are so much nicer since Ive lost almost 45 pounds, but I have also noticed some of my so called friends are acting not so nice. Either way, doesn't matter to me in the least. I'm doing this for me and only me.

Not to impress anyone. But if it happens to attract a handsome guy sling the way

I wont be too upset, LOL!

Good Luck and hold your head up high, every body is beautiful, in their own way!!

Sent from my iPhone using VST[/quote']

Thanks Iphone, I meant along the way!!!

Ha

Sent from my iPhone using VST

I've lost about 90 pounds total and I can tell that some people treat me different. I work in a customer service type job and customers treat me slightly better, or at least it seems like they do. If I was sitting in a classroom or anywhere with a bunch of seats, before no one would sit next to me if they had a choice. If there were two seats open, 90% of the time they wouldn't pick the one by me. Now, people seem to actually choose to sit by me more often now.

To be honest though, I am slightly more confident than I was before. But sometimes I still feel self-conscious when sitting in class, pulling at my shirt to hide my almost non-existent rolls and I still want to sit in the back so people won't look at me.

One awesome thing is that more guys are flirting with me. ;) Before if I was with my friend, they would automatically flock to her. I'm not saying they flock to me now, but at least they don't completely ignore me!

Hmmm. I have different take on this.

I wonder if when we feel better about ourselves that we treat ourselves better and this in turn leads to other people treating us better.

I have previously found myself in a self hate mode, feeling fat and ugly and wishing no one would look at me only to later reflect on having felt invisible, but really, isn't that what I wanted? To be unseen? When I feel good, positive and beautiful others react to the positive energy I put out there. Confidence is catchy.

Sent from my iPad using VST

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