Hi there! I have chosen to not make my surgery public to anyone but my husband, my counselor, and ONE friend. I am curious if anyone else out here has done that or similar and is farther our of surgery than me and what your experience has been (I'm only a month out). It's hard as I am normally a pretty open person, especially to my mom who I tell almost EVERYthing to! I struggle with it at times but made the choice to keep it to myself. I have yet to meet or hear of anyone else who has done the same!? Thanks!

I'm waiting on my prior authorization, but I have chosen to keep it to my wife only (so far). on the other side a have two co-workers that I'd swear get $$ for referring people to the surgeon since they talk about it so much/openly.

I've chosen to keep it only between my husband, my surgical team, God, and myself. That being said, who has the biggest mouth and told someone else? My husband! He swears that said other person will never tell, but really?! I asked him to keep it just between us and sx hasn't even happened yet. The running joke of the family is telephone, telegraph, and tell a member of my husband's family. Didn't realize it included him too! Silly me!!

I still choose to keep it to myself. As others have said, it is my health, and no one else's business.

Of course, telling everyone everything gives my husband a lot more friends than me. I don't tell, and people think I'm standoffish or snobby or something. I have many acquaintances but very very few friends. I tell you, sometimes you just can't win. LOL!

My plan is to tell people I'm having a medical procedure done when I go out, and when I come back in 8 weeks I'll tell them I've been recovering and am now following a medically prescribed diet with exercise and that I've never felt better!

Not so sure what I'm going to do about going home after surgery. I live like an hour away from my hospital, so an Uber or Lyft is pretty much out of my price range and my husband can't drive. So, we'll see. I may have to scrimp together some pennies for the next month or two for that Uber ride.

So this has been my long-winded way of saying do what you feel is natural for yourself and your health.

1 hour ago, Machalo said:

I've chosen to keep it only between my husband, my surgical team, God, and myself. That being said, who has the biggest mouth and told someone else? My husband! He swears that said other person will never tell, but really?! I asked him to keep it just between us and sx hasn't even happened yet. The running joke of the family is telephone, telegraph, and tell a member of my husband's family. Didn't realize it included him too! Silly me!!

I still choose to keep it to myself. As others have said, it is my health, and no one else's business.

Of course, telling everyone everything gives my husband a lot more friends than me. I don't tell, and people think I'm standoffish or snobby or something. I have many acquaintances but very very few friends. I tell you, sometimes you just can't win. LOL!

My plan is to tell people I'm having a medical procedure done when I go out, and when I come back in 8 weeks I'll tell them I've been recovering and am now following a medically prescribed diet with exercise and that I've never felt better!

Not so sure what I'm going to do about going home after surgery. I live like an hour away from my hospital, so an Uber or Lyft is pretty much out of my price range and my husband can't drive. So, we'll see. I may have to scrimp together some pennies for the next month or two for that Uber ride.

So this has been my long-winded way of saying do what you feel is natural for yourself and your health.

well if i lived closer.... i'd be your uber....

You're so sweet @BayougirlMrsS! Hope you're having a wonderful day!

it would be free too

I tried to keep it a secret, but when filling out paperwork for FMLA I had to get my boss to sign. She saw what type of surgery I was having and told her admin team. I’m not so sure they haven’t told others. I also told my work BFFs... but I trust them and know they haven’t told.

IDK- when I get back from FMLA on 2/10, I will prob start to blab. I just know I can’t NOT talk about it. It’s such a huge part of me right now that I don’t really care what people think.

1# she the Boss violated HIPAA rules and regulations. You can actually sue your company you work for for this.

1 hour ago, ninalopez1015@yahoo.com said:

1# she the Boss violated HIPAA rules and regulations. You can actually sue your company you work for for this.

While that is certainly true, I am a teacher and education runs on politics. If I were to sue my principal for telling my AP, I would never get another job.

Im in it for the long game. Don’t worry, this will come up- I just have to play my cards right. Politics, it sucks.

1# she the Boss violated HIPAA rules and regulations. You can actually sue your company you work for for this.

technically, HIPAA doesn't apply to employers. but it would certainly be violating several employee privacy acts and company policies.

I havent did mines yet I'm still doing my stuff for insurance but the only people that know I decided on doing it is my mom and sister. I'm going to wait to tell the rest of my family and friends

I guess I can understand why some would not want to broadcast the fact that they've undergone a bariatric procedure, but I haven't kept mine a secret. Anyone who knows me knows that I've struggled with weight. For me, I don't see the harm in folks knowing that I'm working to get it under control. I haven't encountered any negativity - Mostly just friends and coworkers offering words of encouragement!

I too have not shared my journey .I’m just not quietly ready. I first want to go through the required steps. I’m still at the beginning stages, my next step is the sleep machine..... So for now I’ll keep it to myself.

So I checked and your part of VA is not so close to DC. I viewed my WLS as not a secret which is fundamentally entwined with shame but private. Simply put not everything is public knowledge it’s OK for some things to be private. When we say secret we often are mixing an emotional sense of shame with what ever we do not want as public. Best to you.

I had my surgery almost exactly 3 years ago and didn't tell anyone other than 2 friends who live halfway around the world and are not connected to any of my other friends, family, or co-workers. I wasn't going to tell anyone, but then I thought someone should know in case something happens to me. When people asked about my weight loss I focused on the the low carb/portion control aspect of what I was doing (which, let's face it, is what leads to long-term success).

I'm going for my revision surgery in a month's time and this time no one will know. The only people I would be willing to tell are some friends who are also morbidly obese - but only if they asked me specifically about it. In a few years time, when I am hopefully in maintenance mode, I think I would be more willing to talk about it openly, but while I'm still struggling, it's not something I can really talk about. I live in a country that has one of the lowest overweight/obesity rates in the world, so it's not like there are a lot of people out there who have a shared life experience that I can talk to about it.

I don’t consider my medical history a secret, it’s personal and private. It’s up to me who I share that with.