Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

BariatricPal

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Join BariatricPal free

  • Ask your own questions
  • Reply and follow topics
  • Message other members
  • No cost, no spam

REGRET

This day last week I had the sleeve. I was totally content with my decision to have the surgery. Now, the second I woke up in the hospital I immediately regretted it. I have been an emotional roller coaster since then. I still could have backed out this day a week ago. I have replayed so many things over in my mind when I could have chosen to back out. My husband was/is fully supportive. But, so many times I wished he wouldn’t have been so I would have changed my mind. I have started taking anti depressants and talking with a therapist and trying a support group but it still isn’t working. I haven’t told anyone that I’ve done this(including family(my own mother).

Guilt, Shame, disappointed in my self. I literally hate myself for doing this.

Have any of you experienced this? I am trying hard to move past it.

thanks

  • Replies 61
  • Views 9.5k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Sosewsue61
    Sosewsue61

    You are in a deprived nutritional state, and recovering from major surgery, so be kind to yourself. Forgive your altered state. What would you tell your best friend? You would say, it's done - ho

  • Sosewsue61
    Sosewsue61

    @BlueAngelEyes you need to switch therapists, one that understands and isn't biased against wls patients - ask your bariatric team for a recommendation. Hormones play a big part of your mental

  • Brent701
    Brent701

    Talk your way through it. Be very specific and honest with yourself. Keep asking yourself why.... why are you feeling regret? When you have an answer again ask why you think that. Keep repeating t

Posted Images

Featured Replies

Agree with others... It does get better! I too had buyer's remorse the first few weeks. Consumed by pain physically, mentally, emotionally. Over time it improved more and more. And as I watch the pounds come off, and am buying smaller and smaller clothes sizes, I actually don't mind looking at myself in the mirror and I like what I see! At almost one year post op I'm at 163, with starting weight. Feeling so much better than that first month. Good luck to those of you struggling just after surgery. Hang in there!

  • Author
4 hours ago, rs said:

Agree with others... It does get better! I too had buyer's remorse the first few weeks. Consumed by pain physically, mentally, emotionally. Over time it improved more and more. And as I watch the pounds come off, and am buying smaller and smaller clothes sizes, I actually don't mind looking at myself in the mirror and I like what I see! At almost one year post op I'm at 163, with starting weight. Feeling so much better than that first month. Good luck to those of you struggling just after surgery. Hang in there!

Thanks. I am hoping soon this will go away.

If my two cents is worth anything, I would say definitely continue with the therapy. Then maybe try writing your non-scale victories (NSV) in a notebook. Maybe as you see the list of NSV's increase it will help you recognize the benefits of the surgery from the health and lifestyle aspect.

" Keep the faith, for this too shall pass"

  • Author
7 hours ago, MLB357 said:

If my two cents is worth anything, I would say definitely continue with the therapy. Then maybe try writing your non-scale victories (NSV) in a notebook. Maybe as you see the list of NSV's increase it will help you recognize the benefits of the surgery from the health and lifestyle aspect.

" Keep the faith, for this too shall pass"

Thank you. I am trying hard to work through the regret.

I am also one week out and cry every day about what I did . I felt so prepared before the surgery . I feel like reading all the message boards also messed with my mind ... so many horror stories , and it’s hard not to wonder if they will happen to you. It’s very very hard in the beginning .
  • Author
4 minutes ago, nacfsu said:

I am also one week out and cry every day about what I did . I felt so prepared before the surgery . I feel like reading all the message boards also messed with my mind ... so many horror stories , and it’s hard not to wonder if they will happen to you. It’s very very hard in the beginning .

I am sorry you are going through this too. I am working hard with a therapist and going to a support group.

I wished I would have done more research and tried harder on my own. Now, I don’t feel like this was for me and I have to wake up everyday feeling this way. (Well, when I actually sleep. I’m having a hard time sleeping)

Praying for you.

  • Author
7 minutes ago, nacfsu said:

I am also one week out and cry every day about what I did . I felt so prepared before the surgery . I feel like reading all the message boards also messed with my mind ... so many horror stories , and it’s hard not to wonder if they will happen to you. It’s very very hard in the beginning .

What surgery did you have?

  • Popular Post

@BlueAngelEyes you need to switch therapists, one that understands and isn't biased against wls patients - ask your bariatric team for a recommendation.

Hormones play a big part of your mental states right now, and this will jack with your perceptions and they will continue to bounce around during this process. Soon adding more exercise and getting better sleep will level these out.

All of you are thinking you are deprived because you have made food events a large part of your lives and now it has to change. It just has to or you will not succeed. I am not trying to be negative here, but these changes need to be permanent or you will gain weight back. Early in this journey you will naturally lose because of the severe restriction and the honeymoon period, even if you eat non-nutritious food. You will think -' hey I ate my protein and I had some pizza and lost 8 pounds this week, this works'. Yes it does because of the honeymoon period. Don't let that be a slippery slope to indulge whenever you 'feel' like it - it's my brother's wedding, it's my friend's baby shower - I must celebrate. NO, not with the food - enjoy the gifts, the decorations, the party part - food is secondary.

Everyone that has been obese is insulin resistent, and your body has spent years getting there. Some of you say you were healthy at 41BMI and I call BS. You were headed for diabetes and high blood pressure and sleep apnea, and compromising all your organs. The longer you keep grain carbs with no nutritional value and sugar out of your system the less you will crave them, and you will be free from this demon of ill health. I am not saying never, but build this early resolve to fix your health. You will be amazed, active, more energetic and happier.

And wanting to look healthy and cute is not vain. Don't beat yourself up over wanting to look good - you will feel even better. Hang in there.

This is actually something that seems to be pretty common. You're going to be okay. Someday, you may actually miss those first few months after surgery. Your hormones are trying to re-regulate. You're recovering from major surgery. Give yourself time to process all of this. It won't always be this strange.

  • Author
I am still in shock I had this major surgery! Why didn’t I realize what major surgery it was before?!??
I am working hard on moving forward.
Trying to get protein in becoming a real struggle.
BlueAngelEyes- get a new therapist! My GP wasn’t supportive so I fired him. Sorry, I don’t have time for that nonsense. It’s my life, my health and just because he can run a half marathon doesn’t mean he is the expert of massive weight loss!!
I’ve already had slight buyers remorse when I think of random foods i probably will never eat the same again. Like nachos ? or deep dish ?. But I’ll take being healthy over that any day. I have to mentally snap back to reality. It’s a struggle.
On 7/3/2019 at 9:22 PM, CrystalV said:

This day last week I had the sleeve. I was totally content with my decision to have the surgery. Now, the second I woke up in the hospital I immediately regretted it. I have been an emotional roller coaster since then. I still could have backed out this day a week ago. I have replayed so many things over in my mind when I could have chosen to back out. My husband was/is fully supportive. But, so many times I wished he wouldn’t have been so I would have changed my mind. I have started taking anti depressants and talking with a therapist and trying a support group but it still isn’t working. I haven’t told anyone that I’ve done this(including family(my own mother).

Guilt, Shame, disappointed in my self. I literally hate myself for doing this.

Have any of you experienced this? I am trying hard to move past it.

thanks

I don't understand? What's there to feel bad about?

You made a decision to better yourself. Tp change your life and to get healthy.

You've made the right choice just take it day by day. It's not the end of the world.

26 minutes ago, Ren951 said:

I’ve already had slight buyers remorse when I think of random foods i probably will never eat the same again. Like nachos ? or deep dish ?. But I’ll take being healthy over that any day. I have to mentally snap back to reality. It’s a struggle.

Find healthy ways to eat your old favorites with no guilt. Nutrition is still flavorful.

Nachos - Quest tortilla chips, ground turkey 99% lean, taco seasoning, diced green and red bell peppers, onion, salsa and a small amount of cheese

Pizza - Veggies, turkey sausage and pepperoni (keeps calories lower) Small amount of cheese on a cauliflower crust.

61qJa+2HtpL._SY355_.jpg

1772de52-6b76-4e72-8439-cf2bdbab1073_1.20bb626bcd35cbe8de1b893a2fc1623d.jpg

download.png

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.