I lied

[rs 1,473]

After 7 months one of my teammates came up and directly asked me if I had surgery. I paused, then flat out lied and said no. I followed up the lie with truth. My Dr scared me into losing weight plus my Dad died at 58. Said I'm eating significantly fewer calories, tracking on an app, focusing on Protein to keep me full, and exercising more. She said that it was inspirational, although she never really said I look good. Guess I just need to be satisfied with the inspirational comment. Most people who have come up to me have said I look good and asked what I've done to lose the weight, but until now no one has mentioned surgery. Wondering if others are thinking it. Regardless, I'm happy I'm keeping this private. #mysecretismine #liar

[SargentSkittles 12]

That is one thing I'm most scared about going into surgery. You are very inspirational, and I'm sure you look awesome lol. Thanks for sharing, I feel not so alone on wanting to hide the fact I'm choosing surgery, due to the bad wrap it gets.
Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

[jaytissle55 180]

I think that is very rude for a coworker to come to you and ask you personal questions.. I would of said excuse me, mind your own business and find someone else to question about there personal journey!!!!! That's what I would of said. No one's business but yours, now if you tell them then that's on you. People are something, I would have a field day telling them about themselves... That's my 2cents....

[GreenTealael 24,868]

I've done the same. With a straight face and erect posture. You can *lie* about it all you want to nosey people who just want an all access pass to your life. They don't get one and you don't have to give it.

P R I V A C Y

You deserve it. Protect it, hell even *lie* to maintain it if you *need* to about this in a world that no longer respects boundaries and will steal it at every turn.

Medical information is after all inherently private unless it directly affects another persons health.

Jealously does not qualify

Congrats on your success 💜

Edited March 16, 2019 by GreenTealael

[Feelinghopefulnow 62]

7 hours ago, rs said:

After 7 months one of my teammates came up and directly asked me if I had surgery. I paused, then flat out lied and said no. I followed up the lie with truth. My Dr scared me into losing weight plus my Dad died at 58. Said I'm eating significantly fewer calories, tracking on an app, focusing on Protein to keep me full, and exercising more. She said that it was inspirational, although she never really said I look good. Guess I just need to be satisfied with the inspirational comment. Most people who have come up to me have said I look good and asked what I've done to lose the weight, but until now no one has mentioned surgery. Wondering if others are thinking it. Regardless, I'm happy I'm keeping this private. #mysecretismine #liar

Good for you , its no one else's business I'm due to have sleeve on March 20 and its my secret . Everyone I know would think its he easy route they wouldn't understand how dedicated you have to be to succeed and use this tool properly anyway. I'm sure you look amazing and feel great too. I'm hoping not to have questions as I've lost a bit of weight during pre op and they all think im being strict with food so fingers crossed it stays that way

[FluffyChix 17,409]

Congrats!

I do the same thing.

[GradyCat 3,692]

I'm keeping it a secret too. That's pretty bold for someone to straight out ask you if you've had weight loss surgery instead of just assuming you've been dieting and exercising and getting healthy. People are rude.

[summerset 5,261]

People are so different. I prefer people asking directly and then I give an honest answer.

[voyagerslug 17]

Im with summerset ... i don’t get why so many people fee the need to lie about having surgery. Who cares if you hd surgery to lose weight? It makes me think that part if the stigma is self imposed. If we treat surgery like it is taboo or worth hiding then isnt it always going to continue being thought of by others that way?

[jaytissle55 180]

My business is my business, if I want to tell people that’s my decision... I shouldn’t have to walk around with a sign around my neck saying “I had bariatric surgery”!!!! So if you had a medical procedure u r saying u should tell everyone!!! Make no sense, your business is your own business to be talked about only if u decide to tell others!!!

[FluffyChix 17,409]

4 minutes ago, voyagerslug said:

Im with summerset ... i don’t get why so many people fee the need to lie about having surgery. Who cares if you hd surgery to lose weight? It makes me think that part if the stigma is self imposed. If we treat surgery like it is taboo or worth hiding then isnt it always going to continue being thought of by others that way?

To each their own and viva la difference!

I just believe I'm not the poster child for WLS awareness and feel that this is my story to tell to whom I choose. Most people do not possess the "need-to-know" security clearance for this.

It has nothing to do with stigmas for me. It has to do with not wanting to be the subject of idle curiosity and commentary. Gossip about someone else.

[summerset 5,261]

4 minutes ago, jaytissle55 said:

I shouldn’t have to walk around with a sign around my neck saying “I had bariatric surgery”!!!!

That's quite different from telling a lie when asked about what you did to lose weight and I don't know why so many users on here react in the same way you just did. Nobody suggests that you wear a sign around your neck stating you had WLS and I have no idea why so many users jump to the conclusion that anyone who doesn't lie about WLS is actually suggesting "telling everyone" and get quite defensive about this issue.

The way I see it is that people will be gossiping about your weight loss anyway. Do you really and honestly believe anyone buys this "Oh, I just exercise and eat healthy" schlock? Especially when people know your for years and witnessed your past weight loss attempts?

If someone suddenly loses e. g. 100 lbs of weight and eats very little I'd suspect two things:

1) the person is very sick

2) the person had WLS

with 2) being more likely when the person is actually behaving like usual. If that person runs around telling everyone who wants to know how he/she did it that it's just exercise and "eating healthy" I'd think to myself "Yeah, right... tell some more fairy tales".

I personally wouldn't confront a person with weight loss (unless we're quite close and the person seems to be generally open about the topic), asking how he/she did it because I think it's not my business and I personally prefer not to be asked about weight loss but when I'm asked, I don't lie.

[naiad 51]

I plan to lie as well. It is no ones business but ours who we want to share with. I figure my statement of I am making lifestyle changes is accurate without mentioning surgery. Also, I find it a bit rude if a coworker or acquaintance to ask such personal questions. I told 4 people who I know can keep a secret!

[SargentSkittles 12]

I can see your point of view summer set. I have told a few close people I am having WLS just because I need support. I'm sure once I gain more confidence I will tell more people if they ask me, and i trust them, as my weight issues started when I was 2, and I'm now 21. People will surely notice. I guess I just need to build my confidence, and learn that in a way, telling I can try to break so negative stigma, by explaining that it's a tool, and how hard you have to work. For now, I'd rather keep it a secret, as I'm scared I will fail, like every other time. I have hope. I just need to believe in myself more....but as FluffyChix said...to each their own.

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

[sleevdB89 42]

To each it’s own honestly. I tell ppl about my upcoming surgery. I feel like some people are nosey and some people really are looking for the courage to start their own journey. I am not ashamed whatsoever. This decision takes courage and it isn’t easy. If I can help someone else struggling with their weight I’m all for it. If they just want to be in my business be my guest. Either way I’m healthy & fabulous.