I lied

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

2 hours ago, summerset said:

yet people are embarrassed to talk about sex and diet and calories and weight issues.

I agree we are bombarded with weight loss Information and online forums to beat weight loss, diet, surgery, fitness, eating disorders and body image into the ground. Wow, I don’t see many of these topics and being a closeted subjects.

To each there own about disclosing WLS. Some may want to shout the lifesaving benefits of WLS to the world. Others may simply be private people that keep their medical info to themselves. Some of us share with only people that are honestly interested. No need to beat your head against the wall with the many people that have negative opinions on WLS.

Are we lacking in getting the word out on WLS? No – Google it! About 253,000,000 results (0.65 seconds)

TV shows: Many discussing weight, WLS, my 600 pound life, Celebrities sharing there WLS experience, skin removal, diet, eating disorders, exercise, body positivity.

Social media: Drs and hospitals advertising WLS, Instagram, bloggers, bariatric recipe site, pod casts, fitness and food log apps, YouTube and forums including bariatricpal. How many of these accounts are WLS patients and professionals?

With all this information out there, Many of us don’t feel the need to be the weight loss or weight loss surgery spokesperson. Its not all about shame..

Side note: How many sites and forums on the topc of sex...LOL its a choice on how open you want to be on that topic as well.

[Frustr8 7,886]

Froufrou the standard answer in my day- oh my Good Lord I sound like one of my relatives- cringe cringe was: If you will forgive me for not answering I will forgive you for asking such a question. A little heavy but it usually worked. And before I got educated about bariatric et all, I was one of the people that thought cancer, "Arnold", actually had a cousin with the name, is deliberately starving her and he really WAS that mean in other facets of life, she has developed anorexia, or they have lost their jobs and don't want anyone to know. Weight loss like we all are endeavoring to do- nope never entered my mind!
And to be honest at this point, saw a " shirt tale" kind of a step- cousin, her great- aunt married my great- uncle, anyway we're close to the same age, well I was honest, She came up and said " Frustr8 you look different, have you lost weight or something? "Yeah Pammy Jo, I am now almost half the woman I used be and twice as happy as I ever guessed I could be!." And she paused a minute and then threw her arms around me and hugged me. Praise God she didn't mention that I now resemble Great Uncle Henry, the one that made us related. I just as leave not hear that, he died in the 50s and I was Young then.

[GreenTealael 24,852]

I hate this thread... I had to go through and like soooooo may well thought out responses my fingers hurt 😂

[summerset 5,261]

2 hours ago, Healthy_life2 said:

I agree we are bombarded with weight loss Information and online forums to beat weight loss, diet, surgery, fitness, eating disorders and body image into the ground.

I didn't relate that to this board or WLS in general, it was something that seems to apply to so many people. It's the fact that these topics on the one hand are so omnipresent to the point of getting-on-your-nerves and are yet obviously embarrassing on the other hand that strikes me odd, actually since a few years.

[summerset 5,261]

2 hours ago, Healthy_life2 said:

Its not all about shame..

There are for sure many reasons and most likely everyone has an opinion about how legitimate or understandable these reasons might be. Can't force anyone to tell the (whole) truth when asked about "How did you lose so much weight?" or maybe (that's the question I'm sometimes asked in my current environment where people don't know me at another weight) "How are you able to maintain your weight? I seem to be struggling more and more as the years go by."

[froufrou 678]

2 hours ago, GreenTealael said:

I hate this thread... I had to go through and like soooooo may well thought out responses my fingers hurt 😂

I'd love to hear your thoughts on it x

[ratboy3124 30]

I told a few close friends and family after I had the surgery. No one except my wife and a close friend even knew I was having the surgery. As far as my co-workers and others, I just say I am watching what I am eating and exercising, which really isn't a lie. LOL!

[Bigman12345 58]

I come right out and tell everyone I did it, other ppl judge no matter what, I couldn’t care less what they think, I did this for me, and I never regret or look back, hopefully I inspire, which I have had many ask questions

[froufrou 678]

2 hours ago, froufrou said:

I'd love to hear your thoughts on it x

@GreenTealael - I'm an idiot - totally missed your post earlier. I blame it on my computer that keeps not loading things properly!

Edited March 21, 2019 by froufrou

[justmetj 421]

On 3/19/2019 at 9:54 PM, GreenTealael said:

I feel torn on the just tell the truth debate.

Most people would generally agree that you *shouldn't* ask certain questions or at least know your audience.

Some people disregard this in favor of shock value to disorient the person into giving a knee jerk honest answer... Interrogation. Unless someone is suspected of wrongdoings why use this method?

I have noticed that people who truly care or are inquisitive for positive/personal reasons tend to take more subtle or careful approach. Maybe empathy is partially in play instead of the Sherlock complex.

This is how I have decided who i tell when asked. I've lied to close associates and told the complete truth to strangers.

Zero Fs given.

I agree...some deserve the truth some don't

[JessLess 1,163]

19 hours ago, SeattleLady said:

I hate the "cheating" thing. That usually comes from someone who is jealous or just a butt in general. Tell them the only thing you cheated was death.

I just say, if there's an easy way out, I'll take it. I don't think it's the easy way out, but if people want to think that, I don't care. Like I really want to do everything the hardest way possible. What am I, stupid?

[EJ's Mom 2]

On 3/16/2019 at 9:34 AM, voyagerslug said:

Im with summerset ... i don’t get why so many people fee the need to lie about having surgery. Who cares if you hd surgery to lose weight? It makes me think that part if the stigma is self imposed. If we treat surgery like it is taboo or worth hiding then isnt it always going to continue being thought of by others that way?

Agreed!!! I had the sleeve done 3 mo. Ago. I had a quadruple coronary bypass 12/2017, and no matter what I did, ate healthy, I go to the gym 5 days a week 2 hrs a day, take my meds etc.., my cholesterol and tryglicerides were still going dangerously high, I became diabetic, my blood pressure was all over the place... in my case it was all genetic, and my body was over producing certain hormones that raised all of those levels. My only option was to have the sleeve done. When anyone asks me about weight loss I have zero problem telling them I had The surgery. I've had a lot of people say "why?? You didn't need to do that" well the alternative is having a heart attack and if I survive, additional heart surgery...so yeah I did NEED to do that!

To anyone who thinks having bariatric surgery is the "easy way"... NO ITS NOT ! It's work, and it's hard work at that! Learning to eat all over again , figuring out what works for you and what will make you run to the bathroom to get sick etc...

If someone asks..I tell them the truth, if they judge me for my decisions I don't care. My concern is my health, not a judgmental persons opinion who has no idea what they are talking about 😊 Just be happy with yourself, don't put too much stock in the opinions of narrow minded people.

" those that matter won't mind...those that mind don't matter"

PS... all of my blood levels were perfect within 8 weeks of surgery!

Edited March 22, 2019 by EJ's Mom

[Kendall66 16]

I had a neighbor ask me today about if my mother was having surgery. I was actually taking off guard because this lady gossips and I am one to not gossip or tell anyone’s business. I told her I am not one to talk about anyone’s business ar to gossip. She knows this is how I am so why she asked is because she could not help herself but to ask. I believe it is the individual person to tell someone or not to tell. I did let my mother know about was said. I assume she was listening to our conversation on night on our back porch. ( She is a neighbor). I am a private person and I don’t even tell my mom things or anyone, that is just who I am. I won’t lie, but I would say I have told them exercising and eating a high Protein diet like Ketoand leave the question unanswered.


So good for you, and congratulations for if the are curious and maybe even gossiping, it means you look fabulous and working toward your goal of what you wanted. Great job!

[summerset 5,261]

6 hours ago, JessLess said:

Like I really want to do everything the hardest way possible. What am I, stupid?

This. LOL.

[othella 20]

Love the response. Will use!!

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