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I know my message is long, but please read it. I need help!!

Hey guys, my one year was September 19. I went to my surgeon for a check in yesterday, I have gained 11 pounds. I am so disgusted I don't know what to do. He was so ugly to me and non caring. He told me I failed and there was nothing he would do for me. Then he told me maybe I should try Medifast...REALLY!!! I should have followed my first mind and not use him. I told him from the beginning my sleeve wasn't stopping me from eating and if it weren't for the scars I have, I wouldn't think I had weight loss surgery. I asked him did he remove 75% of my stomach, he didn't give a yes or no answer, instead he said the lady I just saw have the same size sleeve you have and she's lost 80 pounds, talk about adding insult to injury! Then he told me he didn't have to see me anymore. How often do you guys that are one year out or more see your surgeon? Is it suppose to be an ongoing thing or just as needed? I'm gonna request an endoscopy be done, I honestly don't think he sleeved me right. I feel so hopeless and like a failure as he said. Since my surgery I only lost 34 pounds and have gained back 11 pounds. My hunger never went away like most people does after surgery. Something is wrong! Should I request the endoscopy through him or my regular doctor? I'm thinking through my regular doctor. Please help me. I need advice.

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  • I have been clean and sober 7 years. I am active in aa and my home group is actually an online group. So for any women that has drinking our drug issues and need advice or want to talk, message me.

  • Paul Clarke
    Paul Clarke

    I am nearly 7 months out and from my experience, the hunger doesn't really go away. For me it is a constant daily challenge of managing what I eat and dealing with being hungry. I hate being hungry an

  • GreenTealael
    GreenTealael

    Request a barium swallow test with copies for your records. You can then seen your sleeve and proceed to choose your path from there, whether a consultation with a new team or a follow up with this do

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I have been clean and sober 7 years. I am active in aa and my home group is actually an online group. So for any women that has drinking our drug issues and need advice or want to talk, message me. I'll give you my number and we can talk. Men too, I can help guide you to a feeling make in this area. I always say I'm a "true addict". I take anything and make it unhealthy; cutting, sex, drugs, alcohol, and especially food.

I'm not trying to make my message a public service announcement, but I want those struggling with other unhealthy coping mechanisms to know that they're not alone.
38 minutes ago, I AM NOT MY SIZE said:

Thank you everyone. To answer the questions about my diet. I try to make healthy food choices, I might slip every now and then. I know my main problem is the amount of wine I drink every night. Since my mom and two sisters passed, wine has been my coping mechanism. I drink plenty of Water. Wine and water are the only things I drink. I have two glasses of wine per night. I have vowed to stop. Didn't have any last night and the bottles I had I gave them to my sister and cousin yesterday. My sleeve have never stopped me from eating a full meal, never! I would stop myself, because I know I should. My doctor has never checked my blood, never checked for leaks or suggested I have any type of test to see if there's a problem. I pray my insurance will pay for a revision and allow me to see another doctor. I admit I didn't do all I could have done, but my sleeve seem nonexistent. I'm about to make some calls now.

Your priority is your health and mental well being. Absolutely change physicians. You are grieving and know wine and food are an issue when dealing with stress/emotions. Treating the mental health side of surgery is just as important as the surgery itself.

Glad you are making your calls. Wishing you the best.

45 minutes ago, I AM NOT MY SIZE said:

Thank you everyone. To answer the questions about my diet. I try to make healthy food choices, I might slip every now and then. I know my main problem is the amount of wine I drink every night. Since my mom and two sisters passed, wine has been my coping mechanism. I drink plenty of Water. Wine and water are the only things I drink. I have two glasses of wine per night. I have vowed to stop. Didn't have any last night and the bottles I had I gave them to my sister and cousin yesterday. My sleeve have never stopped me from eating a full meal, never! I would stop myself, because I know I should. My doctor has never checked my blood, never checked for leaks or suggested I have any type of test to see if there's a problem. I pray my insurance will pay for a revision and allow me to see another doctor. I admit I didn't do all I could have done, but my sleeve seem nonexistent. I'm about to make some calls now.

Honestly...you've answered your own question about "why" you haven't lost more. I promise you I know that adding in the wine will dead cold stop you in your tracks and derail you--and if it's true transference/alcoholism--can and will kill you after contributing to massive regain.

Please get help?!!! Please. We can't provide the kind of help you need--an addiction specialist and someone very well-versed with bariatrics and food addiction as well.

I'm so sorry about your mom and sis. And sorry your doc is an asshat!!

  • Author

Spoke with my insurance company. They will allow me to go to another weight loss doctor to address my problem and see how I can get back on track, but will not pay for a revision surgery. Well I'm gonna pray he did my sleeve right and it's as simple as putting the wine bottle down, getting in more exercise and counting my calories better. If my sleeve wasn't done right, of course I will go after the a*****e doctor I used. Wish me luck.

14 minutes ago, I AM NOT MY SIZE said:

Spoke with my insurance company. They will allow me to go to another weight loss doctor to address my problem and see how I can get back on track, but will not pay for a revision surgery. Well I'm gonna pray he did my sleeve right and it's as simple as putting the wine bottle down, getting in more exercise and counting my calories better. If my sleeve wasn't done right, of course I will go after the a*****e doctor I used. Wish me luck.

Good Luck to you IANMS. I was thinking about starting this process a few years ago because of a person I met who had lost over 200lbs through WLS. I never once felt like they "took the easy way out" because I talked to her about the whole process and her experience. it was truly an inspiring experience.

I knew I was going to do it after meeting her, but then my best friend's wife had the surgery and it was completely ineffective for her. I was forlorn and somewhat put off about getting it going. I found out later that she wasn't losing weight because she was drinking all her calories. Not just alcohol, but milkshakes and other bad sugary drinks as well. She finally decided to cut these things out and the pounds started melting away, it was just the catalyst she needed along with exercise and getting in her water.

I know it will be hard, but there's no other way to do it.

Good luck to you!

1 minute ago, I AM NOT MY SIZE said:

Spoke with my insurance company. They will allow me to go to another weight loss doctor to address my problem and see how I can get back on track, but will not pay for a revision surgery. Well I'm gonna pray he did my sleeve right and it's as simple as putting the wine bottle down, getting in more exercise and counting my calories better. If my sleeve wasn't done right, of course I will go after the a*****e doctor I used. Wish me luck.

I hope nothing is intrinsically wrong with the sleeve surgery!! ((hugs))

But the solution of "putting the wine bottle down, getting in more exercise, counting cals better" is not a "simple" solution. Cuz right? If it were "simple" don't you think you would have done it? I truly think you are "not lazy, an epic fail, fill-in-your-loser-adjective-here." I think you are in trouble and need trained help -- emotionally/psychologically/and perhaps physical too.

Hang in there and keep fighting for your rights and to be heard!! And come here for all the support you need. We're here--just not skilled to give advice!!!

The thing with all WLS is that it is a tool and we have to choose to use that tool and show it who is in charge. With bands and sleeves they are both restrictive only procedures so they can only help control quantity not quality.

There are many foods that are sliders as they are high calorie and easy to overeat but when the calories come from liquid there is nothing the surgery will do to help.

I love wine. I don’t do hard alcohol or fizzy sugary drinks but a glass or 2 of wine at night helps me relax and sleep. But I also recognise that in terms of weight loss/ maintenance it is not a good habit. If you have a dependency problem then obviously you need to quit and get support from a group such as AA. If you don’t then there are other things you can do to cut back .

Choose dry wine rather than a sweet wine.

Have half wine and half soda water ( if you make your own you can control the amount of carbonation)

Start by drinking only every second night. Then try to stick to only drinking at weekends.

Dont buy the wine or buy less wine

Hope some of this helps and that you get back to losing again

  • Author

@elcee yes, very helpful. No, I don't have a dependency, I can stop at any time and have now chose to stop. I, like you would use the wine to help me relax and sleep. But since the deaths of my mom and two sisters, I was also using it to dull the pain of their loss. I know that's not the way, so to stop drinking the wine isn't the problem. The problem is my sleeve never restricted me from eating large portions, well larger than I should be able to eat. I just wish I knew why. Hopefully I will find that out once I get another weight loss doctor.

5 minutes ago, I AM NOT MY SIZE said:

The problem is my sleeve never restricted me from eating large portions, well larger than I should be able to eat.

I think this can be a common problem. Often a person feels like they can eat more than they should. What should have been explained to you prior to surgery is that even if you feel like you can eat more DON'T, just eat the recommended portion. The body needs to get used to feeling satisfied rather than "full" or "stuffed" . It can take a while to recognise this new feeling.

The danger is that by eating more the sleeved portion of the stomach can stretch and accomodate more.

Hopefully you can find a new team that will help you and enable you to achieve success

Somethings not right with your surgery, from day 1 have bot been able to eat more than a couple of ounces at a time. Now a year on I still can’t eat more than a few mouthfuls at a time. My surgeon told me he took away 90% of my stomach and I still struggle to eat. Perhaps the insurance company need to hear your complaints about him. They won’t be happy if they paying out for something that’s not working.

Ohio state University does also, in fact I suspect every Medical College in the Big10 does.?

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