Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

New found attention!!!



Recommended Posts

Ever since I had my surgery my husband has been overly affectionate towards me. Yes I do love this new found affection!!! But it makes me wonder, was I not good enough before my surgery??? Am I in a superficial relationship??? I have always been happy knowing my husband loves me for me not my exterior!!!! SMH!!! (I have no intention or desire to leave my husband)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I mean would you feel differently? Would anybody?

Honest question, why did you have the surgery? Was it 100% because it would improve your health and nothing else? Or was it also because you wanted to lose weight and look and feel more confident and attractive?

Just reading the posts on here you'll notice many people want to lose weight and look more attractive, so I don't think it's unreasonable to fault a spouse for appreciating that fact as well.

Plus I mean there's all other kinds of stuff that could do the same thing in a relationship. A new hair style/color tattoo etc etc. I think his behavior is perfectly acceptable and normal

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

how cute... enjoy it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Imagine if the roles were reversed: Imagine if your spouse did something that suddenly made you more attracted to that person. How would you feel if you knew that person was questioning if your relationship was superficial?

Get out of your head & enjoy yourself!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I previously had the lap band and I lost 90lbs, during that time my husband was acting the same way, later on he confessed to me that he was afraid of me leaving him, since I was going to get prettier than before. May be you need to have a conversation with him, to assured him you won't leave him or just shhhhhh, enjoy the attention and let him continue fighting his fight to keep you in his life.

Sent from my SM-N920T using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have worked around men most of my life and one thing I have learned in conversation that a true committed man to a woman what ever the status, feels as if the have a secret lover with their mate when ever there is a change, be it hair clothes or even colored contacts. Be happy and I am sure you will find a way to enjoy every moment.
My mother was as big as she was tall, my father spoiled her to hell. She was diagnosed with diabetes six years before she died, as she began to drop weight at a ridiculous rate, (going from 500 to280) we saw a change in my father for the worst. He no longer wanted anything to do with her, he was cruel, and cold. My mother died after their 33rd birthday.
Sorry for the negative but, I just wanted you to appreciate the new husband as well.



Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It could also be a combination of factors: not just the change in your appearance, but respect and admiration for your determination to do this hard thing and make a success of it. Or appreciation that you came though the surgery safely--he may have been nervous about that.

It's also possible to think you love someone as much as it's possible to love anyone and then find an even deeper level of love. Doesn't mean the earlier feeling was false.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Praise the Lord and close the door! I hope to God my husband is just like yours! LOL

Sent from my SM-G930T using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×