I'm not sure how I managed to find the topic, but someone was recently lamenting (the loss of) and questioning his/her ability to drink at college parties (at the ripe ol' age of 20 something). The question was posed in possibly the most immature way.

Ever just want to shake people and/or give them a virtual kick in the ass? My initial thought was, really? Grow the F up and get your priorities straight.

The OP sort-of (iffy) redeemed the question later in the thread, but still.

Anyway, I'm not linking to the thread and/or mentioning names, but for the love of whatever, think before you post something. The OP is lucky people didn't go off on her - I know some of you rant & ravers were in the thread and showed major restraint.

Edited July 4, 201511 yr by no onions

I'd have a little more respect if they were just honest about it. "I ate (whatever) and I feel bad, please help me feel better about it."

Not that I would, of course.

I have been on this forum for years. I know EXACTLY what you are talking about. I have made a certain peace with the fact that everyone has their own journey, their own emotional reaction, physical challenges and as Ann said, varying degrees of success.

I had to fail 100 times (including a failed weight loss surgery) before finding success. Maybe that person is only up to failure 99! I do sometimes worry about newbies reading things and becoming misinformed....

My head has exploded a few times already. I've been a member here almost a year now. I have little patience for ignorance. I also don't really give one care or thought to people who don't like me, or my bluntness. I like me. I have a good sense of self, and my existence doesn't depend on who likes me. I think if I were even more honest, I'd probably get the boot from this place.

I think, and this is just my opinion.....as I have stated many times in this forum, that in order to get this surgery everyone should at least see a therapist as much as we have to see a nutritionist. I have for the past year been in therapy dealing with my food addiction issues, and I'll keep saying it....because I believe it's so important to being successful in losing and keeping this weight off. I'm no different than a heroin addict. Seriously. Only my drugs are readily available, affordable, and legal. Yeah...talk about a junkies dream!

This is why so many people struggle. They did not deal with their food addiction issues. That's why they are so hungry. But they need to get up, and make a call, and get into therapy and work it out. Stop talking about how hungry they are, and start finding out why. We all have a story, reasons....we didn't become fat for fun.

I also think people should be tested on what they know with an actual written test. Before surgery. To make sure they know what they can and cannot do, what they are supposed to do, eat, drink, and when to call the Dr. The amount of questions people ask NON PROFESSIONALS here about is astounding to me. CALL YOUR BARIATRIC CENTER!

Lastly, I think there has to be a more uniform across the board system that all Bariatric centers use. I'm told to get 50-60 grams of Protein daily. Others are told 100 grams daily. I'm unsure what that's about unless it's a height issue. I'm short, so maybe I don't need as much. Some people are eating regular food by 6 weeks out, I'm on soft diet for at least 2 more weeks. They don't want me on Protein shakes anymore, and if I need more protein only unflavored powdered protein is to be used. Some people are still drinking protein shakes almost a year out! I don't care, I just don't understand why things are so different for so many people. Some have no pre-op liquid diets, while others have 10 days or more. I mean why can't the surgeons even get together and agree?

Oh, and a side note. There are some really great members here who are selfless and help everyone, and I thank them for having the patience. You make things so much better for people who need answers, comfort, and care. Thank you!

End rant.

People post, especially newbies, looking for "New" information....unfortunately, I skip over or ignore these posts.

If they say they have had surgery less than a year, I don't comment.

Many times my head explodes due to people who call themselves veterans...maybe 2 years?

If I did, I would be labeled a "Bully" or "Insensitive" because my immediate reaction, and my typed response would be:

"Are you serious??? You've got to be kidding!"

Hasn't your Dr. told you ANYTHING?"

So, I let the newbies answer the newbies posts....blind leading the blind I suppose.

@@B-52

So you don't consider 2 years post op a veteran?? So what's your definition? Maintenance for a certain amount of time? 3 years? 5 years? Just curious.

I would think that anyone who has had the surgery and gotten close to or met their goal weight is a veteran/success. I still read voraciously and give feedback and advice where I can and I am only 7 weeks postop. I did TONS of research and have a notebook filled with info from bariatric centers across the USA. I have sites bookmarked with low carb recipes and did my research on how to make meals that taste good and yet have lower calories.

I never give advice unless it is something I have experience with or I have seem a general consensus on from the veterans on here.

I shake my head when someone asks for justification to do something and someone who hasn't even had surgery yet says sure go ahead.

You ladies that are the tough love veterans make my day when I read some of your answers. It makes me smile!

Words to love or hate:

LOVE.

HATE.

SHOULD/WOULD/COULD (DID/DIDN'T?)

ALWAYS.

NEVER.

EVER.

EVER!

Did I miss any?

I saw one this morning and did respond because all I could think of to say is "you're an idiot" and I do tell my children if you don't have anything nice to say.....

It was a thread about "Marijuana use post surgery" or something like that. Their doctor told them they would have to give up any form of smoking but they were going to "experiment" and see if the doc was right. So why don't you know in a few beers, a Pepsi, and a Twinkie for good measure!!

Why do people have WLS if they have no intention of breaking bad addictions?

@

My clinic made me take a written test. It was not an easy one either!

I agree with you, I do think every bariatric doctor should require it. I also had to sign a contract stating I would not use alcohol for a minimum of 12 months.

@@Djmohr Wow, that's great! That's what I think would help weed out who isn't serious and who is. Also the no alcohol contract is brilliant! We really need standards across the board.

I was banded 5 years ago and joined this forum back then but had to walk away for awhile because there was so much talk of blending cheeseburgers and I was disgusted. After serious issues with my band I came back to the forum and began to find people who were in the same position I was. I think maturity is a bonus that can only come with time. I will be the first to admit I failed my

band and my band failed me but now I've had it removed and being sleeved in September and I'm determined to make it right and follow all of the rules! I enjoy my glass of wine, but I also care more about my health and getting to my goal so it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. FYI I never blended a cheeseburger and never will LOL!

@@Djmohr I had to sign a contract for smoking and drinking alcohol also. It's something new because I didn't have to do it when I was banded 5 years ago but had to do it for my revision (same dr.).

Edited July 5, 201511 yr by buttercup06

This is not a nice subject to respond to but I am going to.

For all of you that are judging this 20 year old girl in a negative way,

Do you remember being 20 years old?

Were you regular sized or obese?

Did you like to party?

I was an obese 20 year old that liked to drink and go to bars. Always wishing I was as "thin" as my friends. Of course there was not WLS available back then so I do not know what I would have done.

But for goodness sake she was being honest and truthful in her questions. Have a heart. Be kind, I can only imagine what she is thinking as she reads all these replys.

On another note, those that post about not losing weight and "doing all the right things" you have one of two things going on, you are lying or it is just part of the process. There are many posts you can search and read BEFORE posting.

Hey @@judyoz - I started this topic in a forum called "rants and raves" to avoid calling any particular person out within the original thread. I didn't do it to be mean or nasty, just to vent.

Not hard to figure out, sorry no onions

I'm not sure how I managed to find the topic, but someone was recently lamenting (the loss of) and questioning his/her ability to drink at college parties (at the ripe ol' age of 20 something). The question was posed in possibly the most immature way.

Ever just want to shake people and/or give them a virtual kick in the ass? My initial thought was, really? Grow the F up and get your priorities straight.

Not hard to figure out, sorry no onions

I'm not sure how I managed to find the topic, but someone was recently lamenting (the loss of) and questioning his/her ability to drink at college parties (at the ripe ol' age of 20 something). The question was posed in possibly the most immature way.

Ever just want to shake people and/or give them a virtual kick in the ass? My initial thought was, really? Grow the F up and get your priorities straight.