I have no idea how it came up....let me think. I think I was talking about spanx with a friend (which I am currently wearing because of recovering from a tummy tuck) and another acquaintance overheard and said "why do you have to wear spanx??? you're already too skinny". I said something like, "oh it holds everything in place..haha" trying to be light-hearted. Then she told me that I looked like I had AIDS and that I needed to stop losing weight and I needed to gain some back. This is also something (not that specifically, but the same idea) that my mom says every time she visits. She'll say something like, "you look sick. you looked better before."

Let's focus on the conversation though. There is so much wrong with it. So much. I will attach my most recent picture so you can see that I don't really look awful.....and/or sickly.....

1. First of all, I don't like the derogatory nature of the comment towards anyone who is an AIDS patient. Not cool.

2. I get that when you knew someone when they were obese, and now you see them skinny, it takes some adjusting and sometimes it takes a while for you to think they look "normal" in their new body....but.... WHY do people think it's ok to comment on my weight?????

3. I am within a healthy weight range. My doctor is not concerned. My surgeon is not concerned. My therapist is not concerned.

4. Can we revisit #2?

5. You can fill in the blank....there's gotta be something else wrong with this.

It doesn't bother me really. I don't let people's comments effect my emotional well-being anymore. I just thought it was the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. And I am STUNNED at the forwardness of some people. And I am stunned at the fact that other people who are just acquaintances not even close friends, feel the freedom to comment on my weight at will.

PSA........don't share your comments on people's weight or appearance unless they start it.

I am also getting complaints and warnings about my weight loss from my friends and family, and I can understand that they are concerned because I look so different. But to have a co-worker make such an inappropriate comment would really get me steamed. I'm glad you're so secure and weren't affected.

Re the photo -- Brava!

1. You are beautiful

2. Other peoples opinions don't pay your bills or take care of you so screw em!

3. Maybe they are jealous. My mom always said the boys that teased you liked you. People fear the unknown so if they are scared or don't understand or are even envious they tend to take the focus off of themselves by making some kind of rude or outlandish comment sometimes not even meaning to.

4. I happen to know a few people who actually have A.I.D.S and some of them are not skinny or tiny or even thin for that matter so again with being uneducated...

Small minded people say stupid things that affect people in big ways sometimes.

Sorry to that person for being small minded and or uneducated but congrats to you for reaching your goals and being healthy and happy.

Edited June 17, 201511 yr by Crystal Leigh

Um, these people are INSANE. You look NORMAL and healthy!!!!

My guess would be they are jealous of your happiness or your body. Screw them.

U look great! And not "sickly" at all. It might be jealousy not for nothing.

You look fantastic! Also, wth on the AIDS comment? If it makes you feel better people have told me I look like a crackhead and like I'm sick, which I don't find terribly complimentary but at least no one has told me I look like I have AIDS. Like you, I'm at a completely healthy weight, so I think it's a little offensive when people say something unpleasant about my thinness especially since they had no problem being just as rude about my fatness. Sometimes I see a picture of myself and I think, hmm, my arms look a little thin (thanks to my awesome brachioplasty) and you can see my ribs on my chest (only because my fake boobs are heavy and pull on the skin), but other than that my butt more than demonstrates I am really quite healthy, lol.

I don't think people intend to be mean, although your friend could certainly use a lesson in tact, as well as a bit of a chat about political correctness. What if an actual AIDS patient had overheard that? Much as I understand people say things to be funny, I try to avoid saying things that would hurt anyone's feelings, even in this case a random bystander who may be very sick.

I agree with what avafern said as well you look like a normal size person congrats on getting there I also have had ppl voice loudly opinions about my weight now that I've lost weight those same ppl who have basically abandoned me are suddenly interested in my life and are " so proud" of me apparently I'm now a worthy person? The first topic of conversation is always how much have u lost? In front of anyone who cares to listen I just hate that why does it have to the first topic of every conversation?

I had a friend in high school who told me not to lose weight because I'd look like an alien cuz I have big eyes. I thought it was funny but made me get an idea of how hard it is for other people to accept change. When I lost a lot of weight my senior year from doing aerobics, I had a girl truly concerned that I was going anorexic. She asked me if I was eating and I said "are you serious? ! I had both lunch hours a day and was eating both lunches!" I loved that metabolism! Lol

Is definitely hard for people to be as excited about it as we are. I've even had friends get jealous. It is what it is. They have their own battles and I have mine.

You look awesome and thin but totally normal. I did not see your before and would think nothing but envy if I bumped into you! So happy for you. And ilk prolly be posting a similar thread in about a year lol

and you can see my ribs on my chest (only because my fake boobs are heavy and pull on the skin)

I have that situation going on with my fake boobs right now and I'm still 175 pounds! No one could accuse me of looking sickly!

one word, honey: JEALOUSY

I think you are beautiful!

I believe choking anyone that ignorant should be legal and encouraged.

@@livvsmum

Hi, usually I post on the "over 65", but I saw your post and had to put in my two cents.

I am in the middle of my 4 month supervised period. I'm 66, and Medicare requires the 4 month wait. I am hoping to have the sleeve surgery in Sept, if all goes well.

I know what you mean about people's comments. I told the group that I play cards with that I was having the surgery and one of the women actually started crying. She just couldn't understand why I would have this done. Well, I'm at 214 now and don't care to get heavier. I'm miserable now, have several co-morbidities to go along with the weight. I just want the weight off and my health back!

When you hear those comments, just hold your head high and be proud of what you are doing for yourself!

Fascinating thread. Some insightful comments here.

@@livvsmum ... You are beautiful!

So many kinds of wrong in your post....You look great in your picture. Unfortunately, this person has filed away your "fat" picture and it appears to be the only way she can see you. Or is somehow jealous of your progress and wants to make you feel as if you look bad. Either way, it's all on her. My temper probably would've made a rare appearance with a firm GFY.

People do the same thing with pregnancy. Everyone feels they have the right to touch your body. Or ask when you're having more kids. Somehow people feel pregnancy means there are no boundaries. So while I haven't had surgery yet, I have had kids and actually can't have any more so I get how invasive and incredibly rude people can be.

Keep on keeping on - healthy and happy. That's the best revenge.