I'm done telling folks. They don't get it

[cruummbs 36]

Misery ❤❤❤???? company. .you do what makes you happy!!!!!

[cruummbs 36]

I know how you feel. My wife already informed me she does not support me and will not be at my surgery. As painful as it is, I'm still getting it done! Life like this is not living but merely existing! I want to live!

Everyone dies, but not everyone truly lives.

What happened to sticking by your husband side through sickness and healthy...she sounds INSECURE!!!!!

[SuperDave 1,115]

I tell people if they ask. Not a big deal since I really don't care what people think or say!

[Mumsicle 22]

Awww, Thank you BitterSweet. It's a coping mechanism. Avoidance works well too.

[Blue_Disciple 27]

@ Cruuuumbs:

She might be, I don't know. We have three handsome boys and I don't plan on going anywhere! I just want to set a better example for them and be around. Her mind seems to think all men are geared towards sex alone. So she may be worried I'll leave her, I dunno. I'm deeper than that and aspire for greater things!

[largeininc 16]

I guess with my related health issues, I am not nervous about telling people. I really dont care what others think and if they dont like it, they are free to pursue conversations, friendships and the what not other places. I feel for the people that have had to endure negative reactions to a surgery that most people truly know nothing about. I consider myself a reasonably intelligent individual and knew nothing about this journey that has been forced upon me. I revel in the positive, avoid the negative and that goes for people too. For all of us, this is stressful enough that we should not entertain those that are not supportive. Everybody that knows me, knows I am having surgery. A few who I trust understand the impact on my life, the reasons why I am pursuing this and very real negatives if I dont. That is enough for me. To those who need more support, I can listen....

[MichiganChic 3,262]

I didn't tell many people at all. Since it was a pretty rapid and huge transformation, everyone wanted to know how I was doing it. I always told them diet and exercise. I felt like they would watch every bite I put in my mouth for the rest of my life, though that may or may not have been true. I may not have given them enough credit, but I just don't want to be the topic of anyone's conversation. Now, at two years out, I know that some people just assume I had WLS, and they are not judging me. My point is, people think what they want and make assumptions no matter what we do.

[FairySleeve 297]

"EWWWWW" ?? Why? she thought you will cut off your stomach and put in a Soup for her? Oh! you SHOULD do that! hehe

[wannaBthinsoon 1,634]

that was a bit gross! lol

[Rovobay 920]

so glad I joined this site long before surgery. I have never liked attention or being in the spot light or really even talking about myself. The only person who knows is my wife. so much easier....

loose lips sink ships... you think you only tell a handful of people, but they will tell more... keep it close, keep it tight. that is unless you like talking and explaining to the uneducated. your choice really... I support you and congrats on that choice.

Happy new year!!!

[downsizingdiva 459]

I didn't tell many people at all. Since it was a pretty rapid and huge transformation, everyone wanted to know how I was doing it. I always told them diet and exercise. I felt like they would watch every bite I put in my mouth for the rest of my life, though that may or may not have been true. I may not have given them enough credit, but I just don't want to be the topic of anyone's conversation. Now, at two years out, I know that some people just assume I had WLS, and they are not judging me. My point is, people think what they want and make assumptions no matter what we do.

I too don't want to be the topic of all conversations but my biggest fear or pet peeve is going to be some people ALWAYS wanting to talk about the surgery and what I do or don't do. . .and trust me I have quite a few that would talk to me about it till the day I die...I don't want to talk to anyone about it. And I know for a fact that they will be watching what I eat knowingly or not. So mines a secret...

Edited December 31, 2014 by downsizingdiva

[Spicy06 175]

^{I was really worried about telling people as well. My best friend had the surgery about 9 months ago and I was so inspired by her hard work I decided to do it as well. It is something I had thought about for years but I always talked myself out of it. I told my boyfriend and he was so supportive. He didn't talk me into it and he did not talk me out of it. He told me that whatever I decided he would support me. I recently told my sister and was relieved to find out that she was very supportive of my decision. She has even decided to become my gym buddy after the surgery. I will tell people that are on the fence to start the process. You can always back out if you decide it is not right for you. I really feel sorry for everyone that is not getting support from their loved ones. I can understand the hesitation and the concern for their loved ones safety but I do not understand significant others that are refusing to support their partners or even be there for the surgery. Hopefully everyone has someone they can talk to.}

Edited December 31, 2014 by Spicy06

[CountryGirl5584 115]

I'm sorry that you got that response. I thought I was going to get the same response and be judged, but I got the exact opposite from everyone.

[sunshine69 6]

HI,

I have been walking through theinsurance weighting game since August. I have scheduled my psych evaluation for january, last MD visit end of January . I had lost 8 pounds in October but gained it back in November. I am now trying to prepare for the two week preop by trying a trial run , 2 shakes and one small meal and snack, I have been somewhat on and off so far but I am hoping that tomorrow , New Years day, will help me continue to try. I am a very young 68 year old that has been imprisioned in this body with hgh blood pressure and arthritic knee pain for the past 8 years. I want this opportunity to recover my physical self so I can dance again...and play for the rest of my lifes journey...I scared but I am going forward. Would love to have some of you who have gone through this be informal mentors.......

[bobbyswife 862]

Holy S**t, sis! You mean I should think about it?!?!?!?