Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

So disheartened and defeated.



Recommended Posts

I was sleeved two months and three days ago. I'm feeling so frustrated and afraid that this just isn't going to work for me.

I lost a significant amount of weight (85 pounds) in a fairly short period of time (4 months) prior to my surgery at the end of June. I used to eat massive amounts of food so my body responded well to high protein/low carb and I was pretty successful.

Since surgery I have only lost an additional 30 pounds. I would think the first few months after surgery would be the best months as far as weight loss and I've only lost 30 pounds. I realize this still means I've lost 115 pounds in just 6 months, but I don't know why the weight isn't coming off now. I had a stall the first month and I'm on a stall now in the 2nd month. In fact, I lost 21 pounds the first month and only 9 pounds this entire month.

On my surgeon's program I'm on the soft foods diet. Their paperwork says each meal should be between 4-6oz total for 5-6 meals/snacks a day. I'm trying to under-eat my sleeve so I usually eat between 3-4oz per meal. I am getting at least 60g Protein and 64oz Water daily. I am exercising (water jogging/swimming) for at least 30 min, 5 times per week. My nutritionist refused to let me pin her down to a calorie goal per day so I aim for less than 600 daily and I meet that almost every day. The days I have not met it I have still stayed under 700.

I could understand this slowness if I was a lighter weight WLS patient. I'm not. I'm still 330 pounds! Honestly, at this point I feel like I spent $15,000 to lose 30 pounds and give myself an eating disorder. My next follow up appointment is in 2 weeks and I honestly just feel like giving up. I won't give up, but I feel like it.

When I punch in my height, weight, sex, and age into one of the online calculators it says that my body burns around 2500 calories a day just existing. With those numbers and the amount I'm eating it doesn't seem scientifically POSSIBLE that I'm not losing a pound every couple of days.

Anyone have any thoughts, ideas, words, or a pity party? I'm struggling :(

Edited by une nouvelle vie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Try upping your calories since you work out 5x per week. I try to get close to 1200 calories on my work out days. On non-workout days I typically get less - 800 to 900. Body is happier this way. I started out in my program over 300 lbs. So I wouldn't say I was low BMI or anything.

Also, here is an electronic hug. *hug*

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sounds to me like you aren't getting enough calories.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Losing it slowly according to my surgeon is a bit better when it comes to sagging skin. I notice a difference in my weight loss when I take in more fluids. At least 80 oz. considering the how often you work out and the heat.

But don't give up. You didn't gain it quickly so losing it won't be overnight.

I'm surprised that you are still on soft foods. You may not be getting enough Protein or something. And the calorie calculators are based on average height weight measurements, metabolism and such. I was told under 600.

I know it's hard. There are days that I wonder why I haven't lost more. But I'm doing good for a girl with a history of stroke and brain damage.

At your starting weight was the rny not an option your doctor wanted to do?

But don't be hard on yourself. You are doing great.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you guys for reading that big long mess of a post!

I've had a few people tell me that I might need to increase my calories on the days I work out. It seems so counter-intuitive to losing weight I've been afraid to try. Maybe I'll try it for a week or two and see what happens.

@@Lizbiz, the doctor and I did talk about RNY instead. He felt that since the sleeve removes the portion of the stomach that sends the most hunger signals that the sleeve might be better for me. We looked at the data and it seemed to suggest that after 3 years most sleeve and bypass patients end up about the same place so I thought I'd go with the least amount of rerouting my insides ;) From time to time I wonder if the RNY would have been better, but most days I think chose right.

Thank you again for reading and responding. I'm just a mess today but I'm sticking with this. Maybe in a year I'll be able to resurrect this post with triumph!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't feel like you're getting enough calories. Your body may be in starvation mode, especially for the amount that you exercise. Really consider upping your caloric intake by a couple hundred. I bet your body just needs more energy.

Don't give up, though. It's not always easy, but it sounds like you've done amazingly well the last six months. I would consider you an inspiration to people like me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm glad I read your post. It wasn't long. You have to get out how you are feeling. This whole journey is a crazy head game sometimes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am with everyone else. You aren't getting enough calories.

But can I say this? What a great job you are doing with and without the surgery! You have lost a whole person in 6 months!!!

Keep up the great work! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am with everyone else. You aren't getting enough calories.

But can I say this? What a great job you are doing with and without the surgery! You have lost a whole person in 6 months!!!

Keep up the great work! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

9 lbs in one month is slow and a stall? I know patients/forum members who would trade places with you in a heartbeat!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was sleeved the month before you and have noticed if my calories drop too low (mainly because I'm just not hungry), my weight loss slows/stalls. I'm not exercising nearly as much as you but usually eat around 800 calories :)

You've done great so far, don't get discouraged! I don't think your post was long either - hope all the comments help you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A stall is no weight loss for 3-4 weeks not 9 pounds. In fact month 2 and beyond 9 is fantastic!

As the others said 600 cals too low at 2 months. Should be at least 800 and work up to 1200 by 6 months especially if you are working out. I lost all my weight on 800 cals month 2-4 and 1300 cals from month 5 onward. I lost 135 pounds in 17 months. I started at 315. If it takes you 17 months to lose 135 more pounds would you say oh never mind it's not worth it. I don't think so. Remember this is not a sprint or a marathon. The longer it takes the longer you will practice new habits that will endure for a lifetime. The real goal of WLS is keeping it off not getting it off.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I felt the way you do a couple of months ago. I felt that since I lost so much weight pre-surgery, that I should lose more and faster after the surgery. But our bodies are not machines. There are lots of things interacting at once and we don't control what our bodies do with the inputs. We only control what fuel we feed it and how we exercise.

Please don't give up. If you keep moving in the right direction, you will eventually arrive at your desired destination.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The big picture! Amazing weight loss so far. You've changed your whole life. Your body is going through complete re-education. Please pat yourself on the back and see the long view. Your weight loss is an inspiration and NOT a failure in any way. Talk to your team and get answers. And then be patient with yourself. Let your body do what it needs to do to lose in a healthy way. Congratulations and thank you for sharing your very real SUCCESSFUL experience!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×