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Getting A Bit Of Cold Feet..Help, Please!

Hello, Out There...My Lap-Band Surgery Date Is Coming Up Soon, JUNE 2, 2014...I Am Starting To Get A Bit Of "COLD FEET" As Thery Say..Kinda Afraid Of Some Of What I Am Reading Here & There..Am I About To Make The Worst Decision Ever In My Whole Life Concerning What Body I Have Left?..I Want SO Much For This To Work For Me, But I Have To Admit I'm Getting A Bit Fearfull Reading The Stories Of The Pains & Problems Associated With ANY Of The Weight Loss Surgeries..I Meet With My Surgeon Again On May 19th, To Start My Pre-Op Diet Before My Surgery Date..Help, I'm Getting Really Frightened..?..I Thought I Knew What To Do & Expect & Did My Homework, Now I Wonder If There Is Things I Will Suffer?..Not Sure, I Need Some Help Here Or I Guess Really Some ENCOURAGEMENT!

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Hi Bee, I think it's very natural to get nervous as the date gets closer. And if you have a pre-op diet that can being a lot of things roaring up to the surface. I wrote my fears down -- some were things like will I be able to eat out in restaurants, will I be able to cook for dinner parties, will I have to give up cheese -- all those ways I loved food in my life and I was worried I'd have to give things up. But I didn't. I still love food, just in much smaller amounts and at appropriate intervals. I was very excited about the surgery but I had never been an overnight patient in a hospital before. Once I got there, every one took such good care of me. And I felt well-prepared for the surgery because I had read so many posts here on the forum. I skipped anything that sounded negative from the title -- just leap-frogged right over those as I didn't want to get fretting and of course on a big forum there are going to be people with issues or axes to grind. Band problems generally have to do both non-compliance and I knew I would comply -- otherwise why go through it all? I also took advantage of a therapist to talk things through with. I really copped to my issues with food in a new way -- I didn't lean on excuses but admitted to myself that I had a problem with eating. I needed the band to dim my appetite so I could make good decisions. It worked! I have never been so happy and at peace with food. Best wishes to you -- we have all been where you are now and it's not easy. The waiting can be really nerve-wracking. Maybe get a journal and list all the reasons you want to do this, all your goals, your fears -- and have a friend take your measurements as those are so fun to have later.

Bee, I second what bandista said. My surgery date is 5/27

. I'm on day 3 of my liquid pre-op. Nerves and second guessing my decision kicked in the day before I started. The diet really has not been too bad. Protein shakes,broth,sugar free Jello pudding and popsicles. You will be ok. One day one hour one minute at a time.

Rose

Oh, bee, You will fin dit is a great thing, and you have so many cheerleaders here for you! Try to stick with your surgeon's directions and you should find that the tool woks for you too! Many of us, who have not lost weight, or kept it off, with other means have done so with LPB surgery. best wishes for you, Karen

Hey Bee! I cried the night before my surgery. Everything and anything that could go thru my mind, did. I woke up the day of my surgery scared and still crying. But it was all for nothing. I couldnt be happier with my decision. I am currently two months post op and down 32 pounds. I am so glad that my fears didnt make me change my mind. Hang in there. I pray peace of mind over you.

@@Industrious Bee So how are you doing? I'm going to give you some tough love here my friend!!!! Are you ready for it??

I suggest a pair of warm and cozy socks for your feet! If you are going to read into everything you read on these boards you are going to need a very thick skin sweetie. There are all kinds of opinions and comments that you are going to read and the VERY best thing you can do is have confidence in your doctors and believe that above all else they have your very best interest and health at the forefront.

This is not something to do on a whim you have to be ready you have to be committed, you have to be ready to jump in and with both feet there is no turning back. This is a new life and a new life style that you will be embracing and the benefits are worth it all. Is there pain, well I won't lie to you there is pain, there is discomfort but no more pain or discomfort then I have had from being obese and that pain was a daily pain that never left me.

The pain of surgery faded as my surgical wounds healed. The discomfort of learning a new way of eating faded as I embraced the changes that I needed to make in my life and my body adapted to those changes.

I have never felt better in my life Bee an I would not lie to you about that. It is not an easy choice and it is not as many say the "easy way out" it is anything but that. Is it worth it? Would I do it again given the choice? 100% I know my husband feels exactly the same way he was scared when I went in for my surgery and he was scared when he went in for his, and he was not sure he would be able to live with it, and now he says it all the time he wishes he did it years ago and I can tell you there are several people I know who feel the same.

You are in a good place here if you want to share your concerns you will get some very good feedback and support. Don't just scroll through and pick out bits of threads, speak to your concerns and see what feedback you get and most importantly touch base with your doctors and speak to them about your concerns and the advice you read and see what falls in line and what falls to the wayside.

Edited by lisacaron

Ms. Indy Bee, here comes the Tough Love Train !!!! I have to ask you, " Is the 5 % negative of WLS worth the 95 % positive of WLS ????? Nod your head and say YES !!!!!!! I am the biggest weenie in the world when it comes to pain , and I gave up the liquid pain meds after the 2nd day cause I just didnt need them. It honestly just felt like a really bad pulled muscle on my left side. Thats it. No other discomfort, none. Did my hourly walking, lots of liquids, and I was up feeling fine by the 3rd day , back to work on the 8th day, and the weight started faaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllliiiiiinnnnnngggggggg OFF !!!!!! I still can eat 95 % of what iI could eat before, but look and feel 100 % better. BEST DECISION EVER !!!! Good luck !!

  • Author

Thank-You ALL So Very, VERY, VERY, VERY Much!...I Really Was Reading SO Much, That I Think It Was Just OVER LOAD...My Mind Racing A Million Questions & Fears & Thoughts A Second...I Am Confident That I Need This, That I Have Thoughly Investigated It All & Had & STILL HAVE My Heart & Mind Made Up That This Is The Best Choice For Me..I Have SO Many Aches/Pains & Issues Associated With The Weight Right Now, I Feel As If I'm Already Had It...My Life Is Full Of Pain, Fears & ISOLATION..And I've HAD IT!...I Tried Once Before About 4 Yrs. Ago For The Whole Gastric By-Pass Operatio..Went Through ALL The Nessasary Prep Work, Only At The End To Have Our Insurance Change On Us & My THEN Primary Doctor To Sabatoge All My Efforts, With..."Was It Something, I Said?"...Cruel, Absolutely Cruel...I Was Turned Down...Now, Years Later I Have A 2nd Chance, This Time At The Lap-Band, I Started Once Again To Have Some HOPE, A LIGHT At The End Of The Tunnell..I Am A Very Detailed Person & Too Ferafull At Times, But Also A Go Getter At Times..If The Doctors Tell Me To Do A,B,C,& D..Exactly That I Will Follow..I DO NOT Want To MESS This Up, AT ALL...Thank You All SO MUCH, I Feel As If I Can GO The Extra Mile Once Again, Fuel Is In My Tank & Ready Or Not Here I Come...Please, Pray That All Goes Well With My Surgery & My Outcome, As I Will Also Pray For You Ladies...Love In His Name Always..Mrs. Debi...{Gods Industrious Bee}..+

When I had doubts coming up to surgery, and I'd finally gotten over my fear of losing my comforter(food), I thought about the alternatives: Diabetes, aches and painful joints, stroke, heart attack, never seeing my grandkids graduate from high school or even grade school? I could go on, but the chance of you not being successful with the band or any of the other WLS is under 15%. I had a 100% chance of dying early or stroking out and becoming a enormous burden on my wife and family. Weigh(pun intended) your options and I'm sure you'll make the right decision?

tmf

I second @@lisacaron when it comes to these boards….

I almost backed out too because of what I read on here…I was panicked and having such anxiety.

So I went back to my doc and asked all of my questions and had them answered and knew for sure I was in the best hands possible.

Had my hubby for support who said he would have never supported me if he didn't think it was a good idea to have WLS.

Then I stopped reading so much or at least focusing on the positives. Yes, its surgery and lots of things can happen….and lots of things can go just as they are supposed to.

Try and look at the glass as being half full…it helped me a lot.

I had my surgery 8 months ago and I've been so happy with my results…best decision ever. Some hard work involved and thats okay….its been worth it every step of the way.

Best of luck to you…and hang in there!

  • Author

WOW!...Thank You All SO VERY Much...I Look At Your Weight Scale From Beginning To Now & Am Amazed..i Can Only Imagine How Good It Would Feel To Even Stand Up Or Bend Down Without Pain In My Joints..My Husband Rubbing ASPERCREAM On My Feet Every Night...Can't Do Vacations Because I'm Too Limited..Can't Even Fit In Resturant Booths Any Longer, It Is So Embarrassing & Shamefull...I Have Begged & Pleaded & Wrestled W/ God For So Long, PLEASE, Help Me Outta This PIT...I Cannot Do This Alone...Thank You All SO VERY Much, I FINALLY Feel As Though God Has Given Me Hope Through Your Journeys Also...That Is What Life Is Really All About, Encourageing One Another, Helping Each Other & Being Fit, Healthy & Active...God Bless You All SO Much..When I Was Sunk Down Deep In Doubt, You Have LIFTED Me Up...LOVE, LIFTED Me...Have A Good Day!...Mrs. Debi...{Gods Industrious Bee}...+

I remember being 2 days into my preop diet and crying to my husband and thinking and saying I couldn't do it. My husband said then don't. I remember thinking ok then don't. I knew I could give up again on myself. But I didn't give up and the next day was better and then the preop diet was over. Surgery day was scary but then it was over. Bandster hell sucked but then it was over. I am going on 4 years this summer. I wear a size 6. People refer to me as thin, tiny, small. I promise this is worth it. Good luck and stay strong.

Hang in there Bee...all you want will come your way soon enough. I take up alot less space these days. I fit anywhere...and I mean anywhere. Restaurant booths, theater seats, airplane seats, subway/bus seats....etc, etc.

Last year on our family cruise, I couldn't get off the ship, I was so large and in so much joint pain. This year, my son and I are doing the sub and snorkle reef dive excursion. I may even do the zipline if I get up the nerve.

I still can't believe it but yes, I know I can zipline and not worry about taking the whole thing down with me...or even worse, have them tell me I can't do it because I'm too heavy. I can't say it enough...I got my life back my friend, and so will you. Bless you and please keep us posted.

Thought I would throw in some words, January 2014 bander here,

I was terrified, after every nutrition appointment for four months, all blood tests, ekg, doctors appointment, I was sitting there going "Alright, when does the band news happen?"

When January hit, I remember my hands were shaking when I started thinking about surgery, and prepared my heart for ultimate disappointment. But I had started making changes as I went before preop diet started. And I noticed on the scale, I was LOSING.

I don't know what it did, but when pre op diet start date hit it was GAME ON. Granted, the first few days were miserable for me, I wont even pretend it wasn't damn hard...

But the switch happened, it became second nature and my cravings adjusted, and it lit a flame in me I never knew was capable of being there.

Date of surgery went from 269 when I called True results in fall, to 236 on date of surgery. I am three months out, I weigh 193. My life has improved, it didn't just spark a fire of courage and empowerment it, I was still me, just unstoppable.

My hobbies are active, I even began to dance again.

This is not an easy call for most people, and you have all the right thinking, it's more than normal. And this community can help, a lot, they did for me.

You got this, you CAN do this. You've been suffering for far too long, get a reward from this. The future is you, and the present is you! There is no question, that you are 100% capable of whatever you want. :) Cold feet is natural, but you're more courageous for being able to say it.

When life pushes you, push back! :) best of luck, keep us updated.

It is so comforting to read these stories and know I'm not alone in these feelings. My surgery is approaching and the thoughts and wonder are overwhelming. I have noticed that a lot start the pre- opp diet a lot longer where I start mine on a tues and surgery is on a Friday. I just really want the wait to be over so I can get pay the waiting. Best of luck bee. Keep us posted.

Hi

Here's something that I've posted here several times over the years for "new" bandsters that many people have found very helpful. Just to add... following the surgery you may have shoulder pain from the gas used during the surgery... some people get it... some don't .... mine last only 3 days... that was the only pain I had. I found a heating pad REALLY helped along with walking.

I think many of us have felt or are feeling what you are going through right now.
I know for me I never realized how much food controlled my life. I had a really hard time with “head hunger” in the evenings.
I’m now entering my 8th year of being banded and have talked about this here several times but I think it’s worth repeating for new bandsters.
Try and take it one day at a time. Don’t compare yourself to others. Don’t go into this journey saying “I’ll never be able to eat this or that ever again.” I can eat ANYTHING except rice and apple skins and no carbonated beverages. Follow the guidelines given to you by your doctor. Remember… take tiny bites (the size of your pinky fingernail) and remember to finish what you have in your mouth before you take your next bite.
When I was losing weight I checked in every month with my family doctor to get weighed and measured. (I don’t own scales) I also attended three coffee groups for people that are banded. (I host them). These things really keep me motivated and on track. I still check in every month with my family doctor to get weighed-in and I host two coffee groups. For me support from fellow bandsters plays a big part in this journey.
Back when I was banded my family doctor and I came up with something called the “Egg Timer Distraction”. It’s kind of difficult to explain here but I’d be happy to email you the .pdf document. It REALLY helped me with “head hunger”. I can’t tell you the number of people in my lapband coffee groups over the years that have said how helpful this “trick” has been in dealing with their head hunger.
Also, I’m not really a “diet” book type person but I recommend you pick up two books.
Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat: How to Break Your Eat-Repent-Repeat Cycle – by Dr. Michelle May
I had the pleasure of hearing Dr. May speak at a conference when she came to Toronto and her book and guidelines really work well with the lapband journey.
The second book is:
The End of Overeating: Taking Control of the Insatiable American Appetite – by David L. Kessler
Please feel free to e-mail me if you have any questions and also if you would like a copy of the “Egg Timer Distraction Document”. --- tomander@bell.net
Tom, Toronto
Banded July 6 06
Wt. Loss: 160 lbs
tomander@bell.net

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