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Friend said she's disappointed



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Her reaction has nothing to do with you. It's about her own fear and insecurities. This is not cheating by any means. But if is was, so what!

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Thanks guys. It was definitely a WTF moment. She's heavy too and we've done a lot of programs together in the past like WW, gym, and even going to a diet Dr. for pills,etc. This is a journey I took solo and I think like what some of you said that it's more about her than me. I'm choosing to view it this way and will see how things go. I'll see her this Friday just the two of us, so hopefully I'll get a better sense of her attitude. Either way I'm moving forward, getting healthy, and feeling good.

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People really don't understand that it's not easy for everyone. I lost 30 lbs in 2012 gain them all back and then some. I need to make sure I'm healthy for my family. You did the right thing. Let's us know how the one on one goes.

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A true friend would be happy for you and support you no matter what. I've got a fellow "fat friend" who has said of course she's jealous, but absolutely thrilled for me. She even asked for my fat clothes as I got smaller so she can at least get a new wardrobe out of the deal. Hopefully your "friend" will display more appropriate friend behavior on Friday, but if not, do not feel guilty about moving on with your life without her.... In that case she is no friend.

Edited by Kindle

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I think you handled it VERY well. Personally, I would have told her to SUCK IT.

If she says it again, go my route. It's not as mature, but it's much more fun. :D

Yeah, I'm with Lips. Only my words to her would have started with an F. You are a real lady to behave so diplomatically. Your "friend" obviously does not appreciate you.

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Having this sleeve is hard work in my opinion ! You are still watching everything that goes in your mouth. I was against having it in the past but so many of my friends have had it and look so good that I gave in.

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I guess people react that way because they think this is the easy way out! WOW... I decided not to tell people for this very reason. I told my kids and my boy friend and my best friend. I just tell everyone else I have cut out carbs and increased protein! Not a lie at all!!

Its no one business but yours how you live your life and what means you choose to make it better. This really makes me mad!! Ugh

this sutgery is probably the hardest thing I have ever done. I am so happy I did it but emotionally and physically its not easy!!! It changes your whole life (or it did for me) and its my choice not theirs!

keep on doing what you are doing and be happy!! In the end ... thats what matters most!! Live life and be happy!!!

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'Disappointed'..REALLY?

I'dve told her where to shove that 'disappointment' - patronising cow-bag.

All this, is about her being upset you didn't seek her counsel before making such a big decision. And ultimately, choosing a different option to her initial advice. Like most grown ups do, when they're going through a decision making process. They assess, evaluate and decide!

That's why she's mewing like a whinge-bag.

Well done you for being so gracious in the face of such condescension. Seriously. I wouldn't have been. :blink:

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I hope she realizes how unsupportive and down right mean she is being. That is not how a friend is supposed to act about something so important to you. Maybe she'll see it, and understand it too.

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"whinge-bag"

i had to look this up, what a great word! why do we not have this in the US? its perfect for so many things!

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Have her try your diet for a few days if she thinks you are cheating. Maybe she'll get the picture. Then you can follow LipstickLady's advice and tell her to suck it.

Edited by Teachamy

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"whinge-bag"

i had to look this up, what a great word! why do we not have this in the US? its perfect for so many things!

I think you lot use 'whine' or 'whining'.

Whinging is most definitely a British thing. I like the sound of it. Although, come to think of it, i like 'Whine', too. It sounds like the act itself... :D

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i guess i just think of whining as what my kids do when they are overtired.... but i like both words! lol

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I don't understand how people that haven't had this surgery can even comment on it. Saying things like "it's the easy way out." There's nothing EASY about this, it's one of the hardest things I've ever done. I wish someone would say that to me, fight would be on like donkey kong. I think you handled this beautifully, because I couldn't, wouldn't have been so cool with it. I mean I see people posting that they are so happy with their sleeve, best thing they ever did, but it doesn't change the fact that this is a tool, like Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, and it's still hard work, and their are people that have the sleeve that run into obstacles, but who knows what until you have it done. I wouldn't recommend this for everyone, but I wouldn't recommend Jenny Craig for everyone either. It's your life, it's your choice. Bless you!

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My amusement at the "easy way out" is that there are many of us who simply DON'T MAKE A BIG DEAL of what we are doing. And then it looks easy to the outside. Even my husband, who has his definite whingebag moments (since he was denied insurance approval for the surgery) has told me how easy I have it. I just smile and say, "Do a liquid and pureed diet for 8-9 weeks, or if you can't do that how about you only eat as much as I eat for a couple of days. Oh, and work out with me. Then we'll talk about how 'easy and effortless' this is."

Dillbutters.

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