I'm feeling very torn right now.

I live in Louisville, KY and if you know anything about college basketball, you know that the state of Kentucky lives and dies for college basketball. Today is the greatest rivalry game of the year. University of Louisville v. University of Kentucky. The city has lost it's mind today.

My hubby is an avid UK fan. He is going up to a bar to watch the game with his buddies and many, many of our friends (male and female). Even my two step-sisters are going to be there. He really wants me to go.

The problem is, I'm just not sure that I want to go for so many reasons. I want to go to make him happy. I want to go because I know I should be more social. Everyone is going to ask where I am.(No one knows I've had the surgery).

It's just that whithin the last couple of years with my weight getting so out of control, it has kept me from doing things, from being the social person that I used to be. I hate the way I look. I hate my clothes. I hate my hair. I don't want to see anyone I know from high school.

I just had my lapband put in 10 days ago. I'm feeling pretty good. I'm down 16 pounds since preop diet. But I'm still on the blenderized diet part of the program. There is nothing that I can eat at that bar if I were to be hungry.

I could have a glass of wine or two, and it wouldn't kill me, but I don't want the extra calories right now.

Also, I tend to want a cigarette if I have a drink, and I want to stay away from that too.

So I decided I wasn't going to go. But I feel so gulity. I told myself I was going to start saying yes to doing more and going out more. But I just still feel so self concious and I don't want the temptation even though I think I would be O.K.

I know that everyone will support me and say I need to do what I need to do. I just wanted to be able to tell someone how I am feeling because I don't know anyone else to talk to who would know what I am going through. And that's part of what this forum is for, right? Ya'll know what it's like to be held back by your weight.

I'm just so sad that I'm missing out. But very happy that I made the choice to get the band.

Edited December 28, 201312 yr by Leepers

Here's the thing. It's 100% mental. It's one of those things that you need to push yourself to be able to get through. I know that's tough right now. I remember.

Having said that, you know yourself better than anyone. If you think that it's too much to handle, you're smart to not go.

KEEP AT IT!!!

I'm feeling very torn right now.

I live in Louisville, KY and if you know anything about college basketball, you know that the state of Kentucky lives and dies for college basketball. Today is the greatest rivalry game of the year. University of Louisville v. University of Kentucky. The city has lost it's mind today.

My hubby is an avid UK fan. He is going up to a bar to watch the game with his buddies and many, many of our friends (male and female). Even my two step-sisters are going to be there. He really wants me to go.

The problem is, I'm just not sure that I want to go for so many reasons. I want to go to make him happy. I want to go because I know I should be more social. Everyone is going to ask where I am.(No one knows I've had the surgery).

It's just that whithin the last couple of years with my weight getting so out of control, it has kept me from doing things, from being the social person that I used to be. I hate the way I look. I hate my clothes. I hate my hair. I don't want to see anyone I know from high school.

I just had my lapband put in 17 days ago. I'm feeling pretty good. I'm down 16 pounds. But I'm still on the blenderized diet part of the program. There is nothing that I can eat at that bar if I were to be hungry.

I could have a glass of wine or two, and it wouldn't kill me, but I don't want the extra calories right now.

Also, I tend to want a cigarette if I have a drink, and I want to stay away from that too.

So I decided I wasn't going to go. But I feel so gulity. I told myself I was going to start saying yes to doing more and going out more. But I just still feel so self concious and I don't want the temptation even though I think I would be O.K.

I know that everyone will support me and say I need to do what I need to do. I just wanted to be able to tell someone how I am feeling because I don't know anyone else to talk to who would know what I am going through. And that's part of what this forum is for, right? Ya'll know what it's like to be held back by your weight.

I'm just so sad that I'm missing out. But very happy that I made the choice to get the band.

My Son went to Louisville....I used to drive there 4 times a year when he did....LOVE the town...would hang around a few days every time I did....

I have tickets, right behind the louisville bench..2 rows away, for next week when they come here to play Rutgers which is the closest they will be to us.......Basketball...

TODAY is a BIG LOUISVILLE DAY....Basketball against Kentucky at 4pm...THEN Football at 6pm...Bowl Game against Florida....

Me and my Son will be glued to the Big Screen for both....

I have not eaten any lunch, and have some healthy Snacks planned to graze on during the games...that will be my dinner...

(I'll also drink a few beers but that's me and my business...I don't condone it to banders)

I've been in Louisville when there were big games going on...we were at a sports bar downtown during a football game years ago...packed house!

Not going to tell you what to do, but days like this don't come around often....and I know how Louisville can get....

Edited December 28, 201312 yr by B-52

I applaud you for thinking about going. At 10 days postop I could not have gone out. That being said you have to decide if you want to or not.

And just to be a little bossy - skip the wine. Not just because of the calories but many of us find alcohol hits us way harder especially in the beginning of our journey.

Don't worry about food. Have something before you go and then stick to liquids. Get chance to get in 64oz of Water. Order a Bloody Mary without the alcohol. Or even some OJ though that is high in sugars. Perhaps the bar has some Soups if you really think you want something.

But most of all concentrate on the people you're with and the game. Then you won't be so worried.

There will so many other events when you are fully recovered and stable in your new banded life -- don't put yourself I. The way of temptation to smoke, drink or eat right now. You've chosen this surgery for your healthy future. Just think how good you'll look and feel at the next big game.

I think that it sounds like the better part of valor for you to stay away today sicne surgery was only 10 days ago. Maybe the next time will be your time to shine! Cheer on your team from home this year. best wishes, Karen..aka.kll724

i think you thought this out to your best interest. i bet its a first for you like all of us to put ourselves first. you are still recovering from surgery. boy i wouldn't have wanted to even do my hair much less makeup at that point. your husband understands better than anyone so don't feel guilty. and as far as ppl and the surgery goes what i said to ppl is that i had abdominal surgery and not one person asked what for. lol they likely thought it was for female problems. not any of their business anyways. you are thinking about this in the right way keep up the good work.

You're not alone or crazy or whatever. I completely understand the dilemma about not wanting to be social due to weight gain. Congrats on the weight loss by the way. There will be plenty of other games later on. Hopefully by the time the next one comes along you'll be further on your weight loss journey with more confidence, and you will be further post op with less 'restrictions' too. If something comes up sooner I'd suggest to take a protein shake with you and drink it on the drive over to the bar. I've had a bit of wine here and there already. If you go with reds you can sip it very slowly without the taste changing due to temp changes.

Edited December 29, 201312 yr by kimk1999

Thanks everyone. I didn't go to the festivities. Instead I spent my time grocery shopping. My hubby is trying to eat better too and I did alot of cruising down the aisles, reading labels. Then I came home and reorganized the fridge and freezer. Put the healthy stuff where he could see it. Then I made myself a mushies recipe I had seen on here. It was refried beans mixed with low fat ricotta cheese. Heated and topped with low fat mozzarella and a dollop of fat free sour cream. It was divine! Best thing I've had in weeks! Much better than hanging with drunk people!

Way to go -- sounds like a good prep and re-org time plus making a yummy recipe. My husband is definitely losing weight since MY weight loss surgery. I'm happy about that but it's so easy for him to drop pounds just by having a little less food here and there. Not me. But that's why I got a band.

Thanks everyone. I didn't go to the festivities. Instead I spent my time grocery shopping. My hubby is trying to eat better too and I did alot of cruising down the aisles, reading labels. Then I came home and reorganized the fridge and freezer. Put the healthy stuff where he could see it. Then I made myself a mushies recipe I had seen on here. It was refried beans mixed with low fat ricotta cheese. Heated and topped with low fat mozzarella and a dollop of fat free sour cream. It was divine! Best thing I've had in weeks! Much better than hanging with drunk people!

It feels really good to be yourself and know you're doing what's best for you. The game was maybe important but so are you in many more ways. I believe you made the right decision. If it were me I wouldn't have gone but if I had all I would do is worry about staying on plan...waiting and watching everyone to see if they're judging me. Not too self absorbed. Lol But in the long run no matter what happened I would've been miserable because I'm not at that stage where I feel comfortable with myself let alone other people.. you did good!