gain goal regain How was your 5:2 day today?

[Globetrotter 1,340]

The guy I was seeing just broke up with me because, as he put it, he was spending a lot of effort thinking about ways to take care of me.

[UK Cathy 977]

Florinda {{HUGS}}

[sarsar 824]

Florinda, he is not the guy for you. Men are so ridiculous sometimes. Isn't part of a relationship about taking care of one another?

Sheryl, congrats on 3 years!

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I am so sorry Florinda - it sucks. I guess the plus side is you are really focusing on great things right now and maybe a guy is a distraction. You have a new career, new home and now a plan to get to your surgeon's goal - woo hoo!

I am very careful with my heart because I get deeply attached and I don't just roll with "just a breakup" once I am attached. i have been "in love" just a few times in my life and take it quite seriously. Part of my "blues" this last spring was over letting go of Steven (though I did actually see him a bit late in the summer again) and I wasn't even THAT attached to him but it was enough to contribute to some blues.

What I am seeing is Kevin is definately expressing his attachment to me in a more intense way. Last night we went to dinner and then I spent the night at his place. I complimented him on how he made me feel, because I recognize that one of the things I learned from Steven is that I WANT someone who makes me feel like I am beautiful, and he had just a way of doing that that became a little addictive. It sounds immature, but I like being adored and you know what - I didn't get that as a child or in any previous relationship. It is like it is filling a hole to be with someone who makes you feel - at least in that moment, like you are the Princess of Monacco, only with cowboy boots..ha! You can't really tell someone how to do that right - but when you have a time when they really hit it - I want to give positive encouragement. It was the way he greeted me when I arrived at the Bistro. It was the way he couldn't take his eyes off me even when a hot young woman walked by. It was the way we talked about our work day and he made me feel like I should be running the company (ha, right). You know, just wasn't afraid to express it. He took a call from his brother and said "I am out with my girl". It just made me feel valued as a woman/object of affection. Objectify me - ha!

Anyway, yeah, maintenance sucks, but we all know that. I think a person gets a little battle weary and i have been eating oreo cookies...just a couple a day. Luckily the package is gone and that is the key... they must not cross the threshold into the house... Anyway, I do love my life as a normal sized woman and i am never ever going back. Seriously, I would revise to a DS, wear that nasal tube thing - I would do just about anything if I can't maintain on my own. So far,... hanging on!

Have a happy friday everyone!

We had a small windstorm last night - no biggie, but the forecast was for much worse. California seemed to have been hit pretty hard though.

[swizzly 901]

I'm in SF this week for all-day all-night work meetings, which means lots of sitting, stressful discussions, politics and egos, heavy meals and drinks, JET LAG, no sleep, etc. I was also here for the Epic Storm, which was indeed pretty bad. A big power transformer blew up just outside my hotel -- suddenly this huge BOOM and a flame ball and people running away, and everything went black cos the power obviously shut down in the entire area instantly. But I couldn't see what was happening from up in my hotel room, so I was freaking out a bit. Also was naked cos about to get in shower, so was extra worried about having naked emergency. Had to try to get ready for meetings in the dark, no shower. Looked sketchy as hell. Miraculously, my car arrived on time but it took 2.5 hours to get to the office, normally a max 45-minute trip even in heavy traffic. I injured by back going down the fire stairs and now am in a good amount of pain. The meetings this week have left me doubting everything about my life and feeling ultimately discouraged. I'm exhausted. Not sure how to keep going. Am way over goal, haven't weighed in a long time, and it's bothering me greatly -- but so much else bothering me, it's hard to tell where to untangle things. HOPING for a smooth trip to the airport this morning and a relatively on-time flight, but going by how things have been this week, I will be satisfied with just about anything that gets me out of here.

Love and hugs to all -- I'm always reading and sending you all good vibes, even though I haven't had time to post. I read your updates in my email every day. <3

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

Swiz! I am so sorry you went through that. I hate it when the power goes out. It's about 100x worse being in a strange place rather than at home.

I ate total crap yesterday. Bill is gone out of town and I ate anything I wanted. Gotta get back on track today though. 139 is my limit.

Sheryl, it sounds like slowly, you're letting Kevin in. It does take at least 6 months, more like a year, before I feel like I really know the person. Like, I can predict what they will say, when I want to bring a subject up. People stop being on their best behavior to avoid a fight, after about 6 months.

I was happy to read he has a good libido, cause I know that is important to you. It sounds like you have the whole package. You have a man you like, respect and enjoy doing things with. Having a sexual partner that you enjoy too, can make or break a relationship.

I am so tired of not being about to do what I want to do. I am afraid I will never be able to dance again. I do a lot of twisting and jerking when I am rockin out. I can probably waltz, but I want to go out tonight and just go crazy dancing til I drop. But I can't do that

Do any of you watch Netflix? I was wondering what people like. I just finished the series Wentworth which is about women in prison in Australia. It was a really good series. I have to find another series to get lost in.

This recuperating really sucks. It seems like there is nothing to do but eat. I want to make Cookies. But instead I think I'll take my card out of my camera and get some prints made. It seems like when you have a digital camera, all the pictures are always in the camera, instead of on my wall.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I watch netflix. I am a documentary junkie... but the TV series I have watched on netflix are:

Orange is the New Black

Walking Dead

Shameless

Call the Midwife

I will be making a documentary list for one of my friends - if you like those i can share that too.

Well, this bummed out feeling about your back - is how I am feeling. I cant work out, I can't do anything but eat and drink right now and I am an unhappy camper.

Okay, so I am gonna do the laser hair removal to get a normal looking pubic zone. I am also doing underarm because I have very little hair there but i cant quite get a certain spot ever since my arm lift and it drives me crazy. I am still undecided just how far to go on the pubic zone - she told me most of her clients go completely bare. You know what I realized that if it were just MY preference i would probably go completely bare. That is very popular at the moment, but it does kinda make me wonder if I will regret it in the future...

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Dee, you never share the particulars about why you are so unhappy and stressed - which is your business of course. But, I am wondering if you are at a point where you need to make BIG life changes. People think I am kidding when I say getting demoted was one of the best things that happened to me. One of my worst fears is that they will decide to promote me. I am 50, I want to retire in 5 or so years... would be thrilled to just sort of hang where I am at in the meantime if they let me....

I used to be a globetrotting, career track, high potential blah blah blah and it was STRESSFUL. I don't miss it at all.

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Florinda, so sorry girl... but I have to agree that you have so much going on, a great new job, a life away from all the super stress of Afghanistan.... your life is looking up. Just make room for whatever good falls in your lap. You never know when that will happen, and in the mean time enjoy how your life is right now just the way it is. Its all we really "have". 

Swiz, glad you are hanging out here even if you are not talking... and glad you let us know what is up. Sorry you are so stressed out... I was in a black out in Hongkong years ago... Craig and I were on the 17th floor of our cheep hotel... listed as a "death trap" in our travel book. We heard sirens, saw flashing lights from the street in front of the hotel... we were sure the place was going up in smoke with us in it. We grabbed our stuff and walked down the 17 floors by the stairwell... garbage cans full of trash, changes in where the next floor doors were... crazy! We got down to the ground floor, and jumped into a taxi and headed to the airport. Enough was enough.  I have to say, when crazy happens, if you live through it, its a good story. I am in Sacramento, only an hour and a half away. If you want to escape, come visit. I know your crazy busy, but you always have a choice. Don't forget to do something you love every day... you are close to some great views, museums, clubs and nature. Grab a little for yourself.

 

Sheryl..... My bush (bushlet) is very strange looking at this point of my life. I used to shave or wax to get more of a bacon strip... but for some reason, the hair has stopped growing right where I might actually like to have some. If it was up to me, I might just like it all off too... it is the most sensual feeling.... but what a hassle. I just keep it short... minimizing the monks bald spot right in the middle! I am lucky I have very little hair, and shave the pits and legs maybe twice  a year if that. Im lucky I have any hair on my head! Even my eyebrows are so thin I need to shade them in... and now that they are gray... they just fade out without help. I dye them once in a while. 

[sarsar 824]

Sheryl, what you said about Kevin made me smile!

About getting all the hair removed...my sister and I were just having a conversation about this the other day. I wouldn't like to be completely bare, it makes me feel childish or something without any hair at all. I know it's what a lot of ppl do right now but I don't care for it. I have more of a landing strip. I don't have any hair issues since plastics. The only difference for me is everything "down there" was pulled up with my Tummy Tuck and its visible again. Lol. The hair line seems to be fine for me.

Swiz, sorry it's still rough for you. Glad you are checking in some and keeping us updated. I wish I could say something to make it better.

Today I'm going to finish my shopping and put up the tree. I feel kinda blah. I have my period and its bad this month. I had terrible cramps last night so I took one of my left over plastics pain pills. It took away pain from the cramps for a while but I woke up today feeling groggy. I'd like to go right back to sleep!

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

Sheryl

My daughter is having laser hair removal all over her face. She has quite the mustache, sideburns and beard, She's been going since April. She goes about every 4-5 weeks. It takes forever. The lady keeps telling us we have to let the hair go through all it's cycles.

Bill is coming home today. He went camping down the south coast. I love that he didn't even bother to ask if I wanted to go Maybe this relationship can work, now that he's quit trying to force me to like what he likes .

Check out Wentworth if you liked Orange is the new black..

[Globetrotter 1,340]

Bacon strip?!?!! FOTFLMAO, fantastic! Hey Feed, maybe you have a tonsure because it has worn away from regular use, woohoo!!

My Mom is fond of saying that people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime and you never know which it will be. Mike (the guy) was in my life for a reason; he is the reason I got the interview that led to my getting my job. I could always tell that he was holding back, when a man plays "don't ask/don't tell" with your dating situation, it means he doesn't want to know the answer, and doesn't want to face the conversation of exclusivity/labels/Being Together Officially. This means I can focus on my primary, who is coming home from boot camp in 2 wks.

If you can handle having a tube going down your nose/throat for 10 days, you can do the Kenn, but it is seriously uncomfortable, but it is hard to deny 20 lbs in a week and a half! I have to wait 2 weeks between cycles but after cycle #2, I'll be down 40 lbs! 3 cycles and I will be at personal goal!

[coops 1,790]

Hi all,

hugs going out to you all...

Dee - hope you're ok... hang on in there m'love.  Remember we are here if you need us.  Will you get any quality time over christmas, time for you?

Florinda, that tube sounds interesting... never heard of it before.  Great to hear about the 20lbs off though... exciting!  And great that you have a good job, you sound a lot more settled now?

 

 

Denise, sounds like the worst of the recovery is over now... hope you are more mobile.

 

Cathy, what is happening with your home... have you sorted most of it out now?  How's you and hubby doing?

 

Sheryl, you guy sounds a lot like you... perhaps you are a good match?  Just go with the flow and enjoy the moment.

 

Sarah, you mentioned numbness around your TT scar? I am two years out in March, and the bottom of my tummy is still relatively numb still... bearable though.  Although I am pleased with my end result... I am still not totally 'flat'... I wish I was and if I had the money I would defo get a revision with lipo... perhaps one day!

 

Kim, how's the 5:2 going... please give me a kick up the backside to get back to it properly...I am probably doing one a week at the moment... need to get focused... you always give great advise and you have so many wise words.

 

Sorry if I have  missed anyone... i know I have!

[coops 1,790]

I'm doing ok most of the time... getting a few blue days  but I think that is the weather - it is cold, rainy and miserable here at the moment.

Work is still bouncing... soooo much going on- lots to do and not enough time to do it... but we only have a week left until we break up for two weeks... and although I will have work to do over the holidays, it will be nice to have time out of the classroom.

I am actually looking forward to Christmas this year, I normally dread it - family complications ususally stress me out... but this year there is a change to that.  Long story short, my hubby fell out with my dad ten years ago and hasn't spoken to him or spent time with him and my mam since (Dad said something that really offended hubby).

Anyway, 10 years later, and after a lot of soul searching  (more than just the fall out with my dad ( he has a lot of things in his head at the moment ) hubby has gone to see Dad and they are reunited! It will take time to get back the relationship they had before... baby steps.  This year, his mam is coming down for Christmas... and my parents and brother are all gonna come to my house for Christmas tea!  On boxing day, Dad will cook for all of us too... this truly is the  best Christmas present EVER!  MY whole family, the 'real' people; the people who I love so much and who are the most important things in my life will be together.

I tried to explain to hubby what that meant to me and I just couldn't put it into words ... 

 

 

I am still bouncing around the top of my bounce, going slightly over then slightly under, which is why I have to get my head back in the game... I know a few of you are at goal... and struggling to stay there, but for those of us who never got there and are still trying, it is sooooo frustrating. For me it is anyway, especially as I've totally lost my mojo.  I wouldn't say I am complacent, not yet anyway...

Another area I have to focus on is my exercise... I haven't done any for ages!  I need to find something new that I will enjoy... Steve reckons I should go spinning with him... I might try it in the NY. I am also gonna look at a kettle bells class as I've heard good reviews about it.

I am still struggling with the flushes... I am taking an aloe cleanse gel - about 60ml a day and that seems to be helping ... it also helps with bloating and digestion.

 

I am sure this menopause is part of the reason I can't shift the last 14-20 pounds... hormones all over the place!

[coops 1,790]

If you want a laugh... have a look at these vids... they were made by the kids in my school in the summer.  I've made a YouTube channel to show case the work we do... I am in some of them... I have a green Bazinga tee shirt on...lol

 

 

 

hope you can see it... we had such good fun making them!