Am I doomed? (Please say no!)

[JerseyGirl68 1,172]

Hey there Kelly:

I don't think you are doomed, I do know that a pre-op diet can serve as a "training ground" for post surgery. Some folks really do thrive and do well on what they HAVE to do (like post surgery) when you'll be physically restricted. I know my pre-op diet helped me to ease into a new way of eating and helped change my relationship to food in general, (eating slowly, only having certain things etc). It got my mind ready, I think just as much as my body. You do sound like you are preparing yourself for after, which is great. Commit to following what your doctor lays out for after surgery. Some folks progress their diets on their own or "cheat" because someone posted that they were ok doing so. They are lucky. We all handle recovery different, I would hate to read about anyone getting sick or doing harm to themselves for not following doctors recommendations.

Best of luck to you for your surgery! You will love your sleeve!

[Fixerupper 335]

I too have almost the exact same pr-op weight amd no pre-op diet reccomended. Now, I stopped drinking alcohol several months ago and generally try to watch carb intake. I also gave up soda and caffeine in March and haven't missed it. I trust my surgeons advice. I am doing some pre op restriction in order to try to make his job easier but definitely not a pre op diet. I was scheduled for surgery initially in March and I cancelled the day before surgery. I had not purchased my Protein, Soups, Vitamins, nothing. I wasn't ready mentally but I know that I am now. I've started trying to get used to the protein and started eating yogurt which will be a staple afterwards. I also bought my vitamins and some things I will need for the hospital. That all helped to make it more real for me. Counseling never hurt anybody. But, only you know yourself and only you can decide if you are ready. Everything else is just the opinion of people who have struggled with the same issues that you (and I ) have and have done no better with them (or they would not be on this forum in the first place). It sounds to me like you feel you are ready and are just having a hard time right now. Sounds to me like you also have the pre-surgery jitters that almost everyone gets. I know there is a balance that people are trying to strike between giving you some hard truth which is post- surgery we must follow the doc ordered diet or we can cause a leak or other serious problems! (I am not saying that everyone that gets a leak causes it) and trying to be supportive. Think about talking to the nurse or coordinator in your surgeons office - it will probably give you some peace of mind. You could even pose it as a hypothetical "say a person my size had great difficulty following the pre op diet and only followed it about 50-75% of the time. Does that make the surgery too risky? Should that person cancel?" I bet it would give you some peace of mind.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

Nicolanz! Well' date=' I really am taking it one hour at a time. I did great yesterday - stuck to the plan - nothing but Protein shakes - though I forgot about the Water. Today I've had a ton of Water and a cup of broth. Hopefully the rest of the day will go just as well.

How are you?[/quote']

Good for you! I know it's hard! It's still hard after surgery, but easier if that makes sense lol. Good luck with your surgery! In a few months you'll feel amazing! How exciting!

[buplee 556]

I don't think you're doomed but I agree with SpaceDust and don't think you are ready for surgery. You really need get a handle on the reasons why you may be sabotaging yourself. Insurance companies look for reasons not to approve the surgery and are really not expecting people to succeed. Think of your pre-op diet as a dry run for things to come. You need to be able to stick to the diet now, so you can succeed later. It is not an easy thing not eating unhealthy things in large quantities as many of have but that is how your life will be post-op if you want to lose weight.

Do you really want to go through through the process and then regret like some others have voiced on various threads? Speak to a therapist to help deal with your food issues before you have surgery. This is a lifelong change and should not be taken lightly.

This may not be what you want to hear but it's the truth. I wish you well and hope you make the right decision for yourself.

[Izuri 428]

Just wanna give you a few words of encouragement - You CAN do the pre-op diet for the rest of the time. You definitely should let your doctor know so for safety if they feel they need to they can extend it (if they have liver concerns, etc). The last couple days before surgery, the liquid diet (I was lucky only had like one day of liquid diet) is difficult for sure, but make sure you at least follow that one to the letter. Anyway, it sounds like you're doing better, and I know you can do it! Make these last few days count =)

And I think you'll still do great after surgery, I ate horrible almost up til my surgery and now I'm doing well. Do I struggle with eating right and making the right choices? Sometimes, yeah, but for the most part I eat much healthier than I used to.

[Kellylynn 56]

In all honesty what is disheartening is how some on the boards make it seem so easy to follow the pre-op diet. If I were able to successfully follow a diet, I wouldn't need this surgery. And neither would you. While I appreciate all of the insight I do think lines are crossed when making such harsh judgments and declaring someone is not ready for surgery based on one post. I think it's important that we keep ourselves in check and not assume an authoritative, expert role.

[Vixynne 695]

My surgeon has NO requirements for a pre-op diet. None. All I have to do is not eat solids after midnight the night prior to the procedure. Don't beat yourself up, Kelly--after all, listening to the judging/angry/"you're-not-worthy" voices in our heads is WHY some of us are in the predicament we're in.

I don't know about anyone else, but a lot of my eating is self-medication against negativity. Cheering myself up with yummy Snacks. Eating to avoid dealing with my emotions, then feeling rotten about what I ate, giving up on myself--since it MUST be all-or-nothing to succeed, right?--and starting the vicious cycle all over again.

Eat poorly, hate what I did to my body by eating poorly, punish myself with a mental lecture about being worthless, do a 180 and say "SCREW THIS IMMA EAT WHAT I WANT", eat poorly again. Lather, rinse, repeat.

(Of course, the whole process above doesn't WORK and it doesn't make logical sense to stay in that cycle, but that never stopped an alcoholic from looking for answers at the bottom of a bottle of whisky. I preferred to search my way to both ends of a brownie pan or a bag of peanut M&M's.)

So, yeah. Don't add your voice or anyone else's to the negative chorus of "this will not work for you if you can't stick to liquids". Right now, it's optional. For a lot of obese people with food addictions, all the good intentions in the world just won't get the job done when it's optional. We make excuses, we sabotage ourselves, we make bad food choices. It's what we DO. It's why we're choosing to be sleeved--to take the choice out of our hands (and stomachs).

You're gonna be okay. You CAN do this. Your sleeve is going to make it possible, and you're going to be a success. Hang tough, girlie.

[No game 14,436]

Hi Kelly,

First let me say good luck on Friday.

I just read the whole thread... You are going to get lots of opinions on this (or any) forum.

Some you may agree with and some might just piss you off, and yes some might be down right rude.

I think if I had to guess what these two posters are talking about is that this surgery is a "tool"

Not a "miracle" and getting started on good habits early are important.

You are right none of us would be here if we had "willpower" and were able to control our eating.

But the truth of the matter is after surgery you will still have to make choices to either eat crappy (like a frosty, sorry woman above just a good example)

Or eat nutritious meals.

I know that you can do it! We all can do it, if we put our minds to it.

It just takes blood sweat and tears, like everything in life.

Laura

[*susan* 1,709]

The pre-op diet is tough, and your doctor put you on it for a reason. I'm not so worried about your being "doomed" pre-op wise, and most likely your surgery will go just fine. But, you really need to understand how vital it is you follow the post-op diet. You need to make sure you are in the frame of mind that this is only going to be a short period out of your life, and your health literally depends upon you following your doctors post-op diet. If you don't, you could end up with a leak which can lead to a world of other problems, I don't want that for you, and I'm sure you don't either.

It sounds like you are doing better now, which is good. Once you have had your surgery, if you find yourself struggling with sticking to the diet, before you eat something that could result in a negative outcome, call and speak with your doctor or nutritionist. Very often, depending on which stage you are in and how well your recovery is going, they will recommend something to you that will satisfy your needs without jeopardizing your sleeve and your health.

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[lizv123 389]

In all honesty what is disheartening is how some on the boards make it seem so easy to follow the pre-op diet. If I were able to successfully follow a diet' date=' I wouldn't need this surgery. And neither would you. While I appreciate all of the insight I do think lines are crossed when making such harsh judgments and declaring someone is not ready for surgery based on one post. I think it's important that we keep ourselves in check and not assume an authoritative, expert role.[/quote']

A lot these "harsh judgments" come from those of us that have been on this board awhile and seen how miserable people are post op that weren't initially ready for the surgery. They struggle with depression, anger, deep regret, and while I don't know the exact number the rates for suicide are stunningly high for people after WLS. It's not judgmental, it's concern.

[SpaceDust 585]

In all honesty what is disheartening is how some on the boards make it seem so easy to follow the pre-op diet. If I were able to successfully follow a diet' date=' I wouldn't need this surgery. And neither would you. While I appreciate all of the insight I do think lines are crossed when making such harsh judgments and declaring someone is not ready for surgery based on one post. I think it's important that we keep ourselves in check and not assume an authoritative, expert role.[/quote']

If you're looking for opinions and support, then you must be prepared that some opinions are going to be not what you hoped to hear. I don't think anyone was being particularly harsh. No one was being accused of being incompetent, or bad, or a failure - I doubt that you any of those things.

Had you said you cheated a night or two, well that's human. I'd probably be right along with the rest saying that you're fine, get back up and stick with the plan and it's all good.

However, that's not what was said (which is all we have to go by). when you tell me that you did not stick to the diet even one single day, then that's a red flag, and I'm going to point that out. It's the same level of judgement as someone else who says "you'll be fine," and has just as much basis. I'm saying that based on that behavior, it doesn't sound like you're fully committed, and it would be worth talking it through with an expert to make sure you're good to go. Better safe than sorry. If you see that as harsh because it isn't reinforcing what you want to hear, I'm sorry. It's meant in a kind and supportive way, and in no way is meant as judgemental of anything but the reported behavior and it's impact. Ultimately I want all of us to have the best chance to succeed.

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[Nicolanz 1,484]

I think people are coming from a good place, but nobody knows you well enough or is certified to tell you what you are or are not ready for. I ate a complete monsterous pig pre op with several food funerals but am doing great post op. People probably would have said I wasn't ready either but here I am 6 months out 73 pounds down with not one single regret! It sounds like you've spent a lot of time preparing for this. I've got faith in you!

[Nicolanz 1,484]

Ate like* not ate a pig lol!!!

[No game 14,436]

Ate like* not ate a pig lol!!!

Hehehe... I was just about to get you on that

[AmandaRaeLeo 2,145]

Lol! Remember the Alka Seltzer commercials?