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I don't regret my surgery one bit! I also weight 407 when I had my surgery in june and now I weight 289. It sometimes dose bother me what ppl I know eat tho. I went on a date last night with a bigger guy who ordered 2 deep fat fried sandwitches and thought I was gunna puke as I was eating my chicken breast( yep just a baked chicken breast) its harder to find friend or even dates who have changed there life styles like we have I do know that but when I see my self half there size in pictures know I know I'm hot and I don't mind not seeing them as often and focusing on my new life choice!

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It is hard to give a simple answer. I do regret the fear I put my family in. My husband broke down he thought he had lost me. My daughter was angry because I chose a surgery that could have taken me away. I regret I got caught up in the " Can't wait to be sleeved" mania. The office I went to just churns them through. Now I see the assembly line and how people are pushed through, complications are minimized, and the generally talk is that I would breeze through.

With all that said I am here, I am sleeved regrets won't do me any good. I want to do all I can with this sleeve. If I had not had this surgery and knew all I do now,I find it hard to believe I would do it all again but that is not where I am at. I am sleeved and must learn to live with it.

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I understand where u are coming from!!! I guess i am taking the easy way out but it just soo hard!!! It seem like a little 50 pounds are impossible to loose, or ill loose 10 then i gain it back and more !!!! I dont know what to do !!! Im really frustrated / sad that ive let myself go like this !!!

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I'm a serious cook/baker. It's what I do and what I enjoy.

In my opinion, it was unfair to my family (at the time after surgery I had two year old twins and my hubs to cook for; the stepkids weren't visiting) to put them on a diet of Soup for three weeks because I opted for surgery.

The way I got around this was to prepare a number of meals in advance that were easy to freeze/store so that I could feed them without spending my time on my feet in the kitchen. By the time I was onto soft foods, I would prepare one meal and about half of the time I'd cater the meal to my needs by adding in a soft element I could enjoy, too. The rest of the time, I'd eat whatever I had planned or already made for myself while they ate the usual meal.

It took me a while to learn that I didn't need to make as much food for our family. Even now I need to remember that whatever meal I make is likely to feed us two or three times.

As for whether or not you choose to eat at the table with them, it's your decision. I was not bothered by my family eating. At the worst times, I felt frustrated that I couldn't eat more, but seeing them eat did not bother me.

Over time, my husband has scaled down his portion size and how he eats to more closely match my eating habits. He was never overweight to begin with but feels healthier and did shed about ten pounds over the course of two years by doing this.

I chose to have surgery when my husband was perfectly happy with the way I looked and when I only had one complication from my weight (type 2 diabetes), so expecting them to change their lives totally because of what was mostly my vanity seemed unfair to me. Then again, my husband was/is very considerate and never did things like scarf junk food or order a late night pizza in front of me.

Now we live a normal life and normal food is a part of that. The job to stay away from junk is mine, not his. I had to learn moderation and how to control myself around food and that means that if he wants to occasionally indulge and have a few Oreos once in a while, it's my job to stay out of the bag while they're in the house.

It takes time and practice to get to this point, though.

Do what you're comfortable with and try to encourage your family to respect your new lifestyle while at the same time respecting that they didn't choose to have surgery with you. That will keep everyone happiest while you learn new eating habits.

~Cheri

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    • Aunty Mamo

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      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
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