female only Single Ladies: The Opposite Sex

[Nessa1977 155]

Hey all,

Just wondering, now that you have lost a significant amount of weight, have you noticed that you get treated differently by guys? Like they notice you more now than before?

[ShoeLover 141]

Yes, and sometimes its irritating. Today this guy came up to me talking about, "Smile - you look so mean." I'm like, dude, I'm trying to figure out which of the whole wheat breads has the least carbs. I'm concentrating. LEAVE ME ALONE. Idiot. I guess I'm supposed to walk around with a stupid grin on my face all the time?? NOT. I had almost forgotten that this type of thing happens a lot for the slim girls.

[theoldmusicbox 399]

That's because we are pigs. Just saying. But you gotta admit, when was the last time any woman randomly went up to a strange man who was 5'6" and 380 lbs, just to flirt or try to get his number? Maybe we're all pigs?

[LindaS 316]

Yes, I get more attention. I get comments and glances, and I ignore it.

ShoeLover, I completely relate to your story! It had been a long time since a stranger had tried to coax a smile out of me, and it has been happening again. I had completely forgotten that random men will try to get me to smile.

[alliemm 24]

I'm not single, but I had men hitting on me at my friend's wedding this weekend. My husband had no problem with it. He told me he didnt mind having an attractive wife. I don't feel attractive yet, but I wasn't expecting to have 5 drinks bought for me that I couldn't drink!

[LouiseC 1,029]

I am not single but I have noticed a difference in how men I do not know react. I think this has more to do with my confidence and how I am carrying myself now than my weight. I actually asked a few male friends Nd they confirmed confidence struck them more than weight.

Interesting.

[KristinaAshley 5]

I havent been approached by a man in years, I will be interested to see if that changes after I loose some weight.

[cassieh 136]

Its kinda bitter sweet to me , but yes everywhere I go but I seem to be getting treated differently. for example, today I was getting my car inspected and I got a lot more attention then I would have 6 months ago. on a part of me it makes me feel good, but on the other hand I'm like I'm still the same person I was 110 pounds ago.

[Kerinilla 40]

Ive been wondering about this too. I dont have my surgery date yet, my last nut class is on the 27th.

I'm happily married to a wonderful man.

But........I look forward to a little attention from other men. Just as a confimation that I've still 'got it'! Not to cheat. Never! Its just that I feel so invisible most of the time.

My sweet hubby still thinks I'm sexy though! Yay!

[mjessica 2]

I have wondered about this. I know my bf loves me at any size, but I bet I will get more attention when we go out or when I go out with my gfs. I guess it is only natural; but it sort-of makes me think of people as shallow.

[bratvp63 118]

I actually had a guy at least ten years younger than me ask me out to coffee last week. Shocked the hell out of me. Haven't had that kind of attention in over 19 years. Made me smile and felt good about myself. I have been married 26 years to the love of my life and he has loved me through "thick and thin". He is my number one supporter and the only one for me.

[hadouni 301]

I get many more looks but like ShoeLover mentioned, I don't always have a welcoming/open look on my face. Unless I'm actively thinking about trying to look less intense, I can be a little scary (or so I'm told). My friends lovingly refer to it as my "death look".

I think a guy I recently met may be working himself into asking me out. We'll see...

[Nessa1977 155]

My sister always tells me to stop frowning, which I don't realise I'm doing.

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,281]

I think this happens to everyone as they lose weight. Confidence and happiness shines through and attracts more people - not necessarily those of the opposite sex. It can make other like sexes feel more competitive too.

[pcos_chick 23]

I'm happily married to a guy who thought I was sexy at 340... he's the greatest!

I'm horrible with this question though. I have always been an outgoing and flirty person. I've always been touchy-feely as well.

I can perceive that the 'rules' have changed. Meaning that as a fat girl no one took that stuff seriously. Now maybe, they do?

This is something I really struggle with. I feel like I'm trying to relearn my sexual identity, if that makes sense. Again, happy and content with hubby but feeling out of sorts at times with the rest of the world because I feel a shift in how people respond to me.

I'm a pretty confident person but its funny now to realize how much of that confident was based on the idea of myself in the pecking order of beauty, size and appearance. I'm shaken without it.