What made you do it.

[JENNIFER7375 3]

We've all been had our weight loss surgery the obvious health reasons. and a lot of us probably kicked the idea around for a lot of years. but at what moment or event did you decide.

last august was the 9th anniversary of my mom's death. god i cant believe tuesday will be 10 years since shes been gone. my mother spent her life battling weight loss and depression . she was 52 when she died and she was only 5 ft tall and well over 350lbs. my mother was an amazing person, smart , beautiful, kind. . she hated being heavy, the staring of strangers, not being able to walk more than a few feet at a time. she had rheumatoid arthritis and was in constant pain. but in the end the struggle was too much for her. she committed suicide, august 4th 1999. well i was devestated at the time, my sisters were only 8 and 15. ive raised them the last 10yrs.

well back to the point , when i looked at her picture. all i could see was my face looking back. no i wasnt as heavy as she was, but i was well on my way. i was 33 with extremely high blood pressure. the reality of my weight problem ending my life just kind of smacked me in the face. my sister that was 8 when my mom died has never gotten over her traumatic death. the idea of leaving my children and sisters over being obese scared me to death. i made an apt with a barriatric surgeon the next day. so far i've never regretted. and i often have to think how different the life of my family would have been if my mother would have had more options to her.

sorry to ramble on, i guess my moms been on my mind a lot lately. but i guess i was just thinking about my break through moment and wonder what kind of things finally motivated others into action.

[elcee 3,340]

Thats a very sad and very traumatic story. I can fully understand how it made you decide to get the op. Well done on bringing up your younger sisters.

I didn't have a trigger as such. I was just fed up with my weight going up and up.I also found that as I got older that diets weren't working - I just couldn't shift the weight anymore.

[cindyj33 1]

Thats a very sad and very traumatic story. I can fully understand how it made you decide to get the op. Well done on bringing up your younger sisters.

I didn't have a trigger as such. I was just fed up with my weight going up and up.I also found that as I got older that diets weren't working - I just couldn't shift the weight anymore.

My experience was as traumatic as this, but when I started having trouble wiping my own butt because I couldn't reach it, that was my dawning point!!!:)

[Grandma26 1]

My heart goes out to you. At least your Mom's death wasn't totally in vain, it opened your eyes and it turned your life around.

I had my surgery because I was having so much trouble breathing and just couldn't get out of my own way. Everything hurt, knees, hip, feet. OMG! My feet hurt every step I took. I am 5 weeks post op, 24 lbs down and feeling pretty good.

Hugs,

G'Ma

[greytz 4]

Jennifer, I am sorry for the loss of your mother. I am 51 so I can relate. I have told this story before on here but I am going to tell it again because it kind of feels good to get it off my chest (and my butt, etc. Ha Ha). My older brother's wedding was May 23rd. I knew it was going to be a swank affair. I spent money on my hair, nails, clothes right down to the shoes. I really wanted to look as nice as I could. I went thinking I looked good. Within the first few hours, I felt like a complete frump and just faded away. There were loads of "beautiful people" there from LA, New York, you get the idea. There was so much bling I practically needed shades. Anyway, the photographer they had hired stayed through the wedding and even into the night for the party afterward at the house. I noticed he kept away from me and felt that was fine. But, unfortunately, everyone else noticed too and kept dragging him over. I finally had to go upstairs to get away and cried my eyes out the rest of the night while everyone else was partying. The bride just recently sent me pictures of the wedding including the entire wedding album on email. I was in two pictures out of 271. That about says it all. I went to my last seminar on May 27th and was banded on June 17th. I don't regret a moment of being banded and can't wait to reach my goal and then have my picture taken. I am actually going to use one of the two pictures for my before photo. LOL

[RestlessMonkey 7]

Wow Jennifer....I was pretty inspired by that. Sad for your mom but you made it into something positive. You raised your sisters (that's amazing to me) and then turned your sorrow into a positive for you. I'm just speechless! Thanks for sharing that!

Mine wasn't as uplifting, and not as pragmatic as cindyj33's (lol) but...

I'd wanted the band essentially since 2003 when it started being done in USA (fda approved) but my ins wouldn't pay for it. Last July my PCP gave me a frank talk about my health and I decided I was worth the cost of a Kia or small car and we'd self-pay if necessary, then BAMMO Tricare decided to "pay", retroactive to Jan 1. It was an odd synchronicity. Anyway, once my PCP said that and helped me flip the switch, I had my first surgery 8/11 (5-6 weeks later?)

[NJMOMof2 17]

Your story was so heart wrenching and inspiring at the same time. You have honored your mother's memory is so many ways and I am sure she is smiling down on you, so proud of your accomplishments...

[JENNIFER7375 3]

Thanks restless it was actually your thread about being happy that got me thinking about my mom so much today. My died at the same age that you were banded. And I'm so happy for you that you've taken control of your. I just wish things could have been different for my mom.

And that's amazing about your insurance. I have to say my insurance approval was very easy. I was able to use any weight related visit in the last 2 years towards my 6 months of required PCP visits. And I was approved right away. I felt like I had my own special gaurdian angel overseeing the process.

And I'm not amazing. I just did what needed to be done. I have 4 older siblings and none of them were willing or responsible enough to take them in. I was 5 months pregnant with my youngest son with my yougest son when she died. I think if it weren't for being pregnant and needing to be strong for the girls I probably would have fallen completely apart. So having them to take care of kind of keep me sane.

[lindas0809 0]

Jennifer,

Thanks for starting this thread, it's interesting to hear people's breaking points/motivation. I'm sorry for your loss...

My reason was being diagnosed at 36 with diabetes - I had always been fat, but healthy and suddenly I could see this affecting my health. I have a 4 year old that I want to see grow up and be healthy and active with. My Mom(who I am blessed to have around) has battled her weight her whole life has told me several times that she wished she had been able to do this at my age. I listened to her voice of experience and got my band.

[mbranham0306 0]

Jennifer, I'm sorry to hear about your mother. You're wonderful to have stepped up and took care of your siblings. I know that must have been hard. My dad died about 5 years ago but he always said that going through hard times only makes you stronger. I believe that is true for you too.

I guess my turning point came when I had a heart cath last June. I have had heart problems for 5 years now (ventricular tachycardia) and take lots of medicine. Well, when I had my heart cath, my doctor asked me if I'd thought about doing the lap band. I had heard some stuff about it but wasn't sure. The more I thought about it and the more I read about it, I really wanted to do it.

The other thing that motivated me is that my husband (of 3 1/2 years) loves to do things outside. His whole family loves shopping at the mall for hours, hiking and going to theme parks. Well, I can't do any of that stuff because of my health and of course because I'm so fat. That really made me sad because I want to be able to enjoy my life with my husband. He never complained and always understood. He just stopped going with them. That was sad for me. I was so lucky to find him and I want to be able to have fun and do things with him. That was what really made up my mind. He is so supportive of me,no matter what I want to do. He has been awesome since I've decided on this surgery and he can tell everyone exactly what I'm supossed to do and eat. He's wonderful! :wub:

This is a great thread. I like hearing the stories.

Edited August 1, 2009 by mbranham0306

[RUBALCAVA2004 0]

What made me do it????...Well it was nothing traumatic, but my family took a trip to Disney World in June of 2007, and when I almost had to have an extender for my seat belt, on the flight I knew I had to do something! and when we were in Disney I was very miserable, I couldn't walk all day like the rest of my family. so as soon as we got back I started researching lapband. By Sept.2007 I was banded! Best thing I've done for myself so far!

[LindaD 3]

I had been flip-flopping on the decision for 5 years... I would convince myself to do it and then I'd talk myself out of it. My loved ones would tell me they loved me how I was, they would worry about the risk. And so I'd put the idea aside for awhile until it came up again.

What finally got me off the fence -- my company was being acquired. I knew my existing insurance would cover it, but the new plan was an unknown to me - maybe it wouldn't.

That is what got me moving. I had planned to have the surgery before my insurance changed, which was due to happen Jan 1 of 09. I started in April of 08 thinking I had plenty of time. I jumped through all the hoops but in October Aetna denied my request. I was devastated and thought it might all be lost.

Fortunately, my new insurance covered it and I switched surgeons and jumped through more hoops and had it done in May - over a year from when I made the decision.

[hope2bthinr 0]

I don't have one traumatic thing that happened but rather a few embarrassing ones that got me to make the decision.

1. Coming to the realization that I weigh 100 POUNDS MORE than when I was 30,

2. being so off balance because of the weight I took a really embarrassing fall in front of a whole bunch of people and nearly busted my ankle a few years ago,

3. riding on a plane recently and could just barely get the buckle to reach the receiver but couldn't get it to buckle so I faked it rather than ask for an extender,

4. got up out of a Dr office waiting chair and the chair got stuck on me when I stood (full waiting room of course),

5. and the big one is, I'm at the limit buying larger clothes, I'm not buying ANY MORE LARGER SIZES and I can barely fit in the ones I've got, so that's all there is to it.

6. these are all besides the health problems slowly creeping up on me and not being able to sleep because of feeling like I'm strangling under the weight

7. my back, ankles and hips and knees ache. I was never built to weigh this much.

8. missing horseback riding, skiing, hiking, camping and other activities because it's just too uncomfortable or impossible with the weight being in the way.

Bottom line... I just decided I need to be living instead of being a spectator of my life. Too many years have gone by feeling this way. It's time to change!!

[kyotosong 8]

i have been struggling with my weight since puberty - it came on swiftly and somewhat without reason, based on my eating and activity level at that time. my ("normal" weight) mother was concerned, of course, but hoped i would "grow into it". i never did. as i grew up, i grew out. my thyroid was tested so many times, with nothing being wrong.

when i got older, i resigned myself to being fat and then just let myself make poor choices. i'm fat already, why not? i put more weight on (naturally). a few years ago, i found out i have PCOS and that could explain my early weight gain. i've steadily put on over the years and it's really affected my life. i'm not married, i don't have kids (not sure if i am able, either, because of the PCOS) and i live in an area where being active and fit is really important (phoenix metro area in arizona). i've had some relationships but they were short-lasting and well, i'm lonely. not lonely enough to be with the jerk that's okay with me being fat so he can treat me like crap or the guy whose self esteem is so bad that he wants me to be fat so i don't leave him. and i'm okay with being alone if those are my alternatives.

but i'm not okay with living the rest of my life alone. and at least here - girls that look like me have a very hard time meeting (let alone dating/having a relationship with) decent guys. and i'm SO TIRED of being told "you have a pretty face"!

anyway, a few things motivated me to finally do it. i've been suffering from heal spurs and they limit my ability to just walk around with friends shopping, it's very hard to walk for exercise. my knees have also started hurting and i know it's weight related. the pain in my feet & knees has made me not want to go to concerts - something i've loved to do since i was a young teenager. and then there's just...i'm watching myself age. quickly. i tell my friends that i think i'm "hitting my wall." it's one thing to be very obese but still kind of cute and looking much younger, it's another to be very obese, physically limited and older, less attractive with thinning hair.

a couple things happened that have allowed me to have the surgery - i have a job with insurance that covers a majority of the procedure. also, my parents received some extra money from a settlement and they offered to cover the costs that my insurance does not (to which i am so grateful). the very real possibility that i could lose my job (business is slow, economy related), motivated me to push to do this NOW.

i had lap-band surgery because i'm ashamed i wasted my 20s being so damn fat and i do not want to be fat while i grow old. i want to have kids, and grandkids. i also did this hoping that if i lose enough weight, i will also lose most, if not all, of the symptoms of PCOS which have been messing with me for a couple decades now. i've felt i'm racing a clock that's all of a sudden sped up and i need to slow it down!

i'm less than a week into this. i don't know what i've lost post-op, if anything, but the 20ish lbs i lost pre-op didn't even make a dent in how i look. so now is the time. i now have a wonderful tool to help me gain a body in which i can more easily move through this world in and hopefully be able to step out of the shadows to really enjoy life while i still can.

[nomebug 0]

Jennifer,

Glad you open this thread and told your story. It was quiet sad, but I glad you can learn from the past and make changes for the future. I have tried for years to lose on my own. My mom told me to get the band I said I don't need surgery to lose, but I do. I have a co-worker who got it done and is losing slowly but haven't had much issues. I did the research and said if this what I need to do then I going to go through this. I was band 6/8/09 only one fill getting one more next week. I don't have a problem eating anything, unless I forget to chew like we are to do. I eat sometimes to much then it kind of hurts an hour afterwards. I am losing slowly so far lost 15lbs. I work out alot and learning to face my food problems. Trying to see food as a source of fuel not for funny or comfort as I have done in the past. I still eat some not healthy stuff, but smaller amounts.

I need to lose 85 more lbs to reach my goal. i know I going to do it and I know I going to get healthly.

Take each day as it goes and do what I can by eating righting and excerise. I am glad I got it.