What has anyone said to you that they meant in the best way possible, but it actually hurt in the long run. An example of what is always told to me is "you are sooo pretty to be your size."

Another thing a skinny girl once told me, not realizing my weight and state of depression, was that she would kill herself if she ever weighed 200lbs, then asked me "wouldn't you?" And I was thinking, I'm still alive you scrawny b****. I can laugh now, but it kept me depressed for years, oh Lord I have some stories of the goofy things people say to me, not realizing my position.

I went in for a fill yesterday, and this woman said to a lady who was in for her first fill, and probably weighed about the same as I "Well, you didn't get THAT big over night, it'll take some time." I know she was trying to be encouraging, but did we really need to qualify big? If I were to say something like that, I guess I would have implicated myself and said, "Well, don't get discouraged, I know I didn't get big overnight, so I knew it would take some time to get if off." Anyway, after the lady said that, it was kind of uncomfortable and everyone started looking around awkwardly... so I said, "Yeah, I don't know if there's a skinny girl inside of me. If there is I think I ate her a long time ago." And tried to move on to another topic. The lady says to me "Oh, there's a cute body underneath all that. blah blah" I didn't hear the rest because I wanted to say, "I have a cute body now!" I'm proud of who I am and don't think I'm dog looking. I'm a cute girl, weight or no weight!

Just made me giggle. I thought, yeah... even fat people can make uncomfortable fat comments. She had about 100 pounds to lose, so maybe we're on different playing fields. My 200 pounds to lose must be overwhelming to her. :thumbup:

My favorite was when my daughter graduated from DePaul. I went with my husband (who's obese, too.) and my daughter's father came with his wife. The wife whispered (loudly) "I wonder how they do it?" I leaned over and asked her "Why? do you want to watch" I haven't seen her since.

:thumbup:

hahahahahha suzanne! Thats hilarious...and I will admit to it...I TOTALLY had a blonde moment and had to read that over and over to figure out "do what?" lol!!! Atleast Ill admit my ditziness :party:

oh and thanks for the compliments :party:

Okay, I know this is my 3rd post in a row....AND I SWEAR that I will get a smaller picture to put in my signature tomorrow....BUT Irony has struck my life again,

When I was pregnant, the baby's father's new girlfriend would say mean things about me getting pregnant and being stupid and being a fat "but" <not an exact quote.....

&& I just found out that shes PREGNANT!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I am very sensitive about my weight and being a yo-yo dieter in the past (hopefully not any more!) I've had compliments that have turned bad in my head as I've regained weight... two that really stick out in my head are

1) a friend of mine who I met when I was 73kg (160lb and a healthy weight for my height)... I was telling her about my battles with weight over the years and she said "you'd be pretty no matter what weight your were..." fast forward to when I went up to 225lbs just before my surgery... fast forward to my current weight 175lbs, the other day we were discussing my journey (she is the only friend that knows about the surgery and has been so supportive) and she said (in the nicest possible way) you look great, when you put on all that weight you looked so thick around the face and neck, you finally look like you again!!! I know that I should take that as the compliment that she intended but all I could think as a yo-yo dieter was I guess I aint so pretty at any weight and I felt like sh*t!!

2) The to top it all off... the other day someone that I don't much care for but unfortunately through colleagues see often... said to me "funny, you look so much older now you've lost weight"... I promptly booked in for botox!

K

kt 999, that second story was just brute mean. It's stories like these I just don't get. That wasn't even meant to be nice in any way.

I don't understand what kind of satisfaction people get from saying things like this to someone else.

I have heard several comments such as "Oh, I would never do one of those weight loss surgery procedures. I know someone that did and now they have so many wrinkles and look old!" The funny thing is one person I know that said that is now scheduled for the band! I think it is just another case of someone knocking someone else down to try to make themselves feel better for what ever reason. I personally have never seen anyone that looks worse after gastric bypass or the band. There may be some extra skin but so what. Most people look and feel better and are in better health than before surgery...and that's the whole point!

"Extra" skin = no fat to fill it up with.

LORD PLEASE GIVE ME EXTRA SKIN! :cry_smile:

Hugs,

Donna

here's a t-shirt for anyone that has had someone say "You have a pretty face, if only you could lose some of that a##"

It was about 10 years ago that I lost 100 lbs. Co-workers would come up to me and say, "WOW! You've lost a TON of weight!" or "You're like half the person - how much have you lost!?"

Okay. Thanks for noticing I'm smaller, but...a ton of weight? That's a lot of weight. And second, I didn't want to shout out that yes, I had 100 extra pounds on me.

What's wrong with, "You look great! Keep up the good work!" or "I'm happy for you - I know it's been hard work". Sometimes people just don't get it.

I won't go into the names I've been called. No sense in going down that memory lane, however one of my all-time fave's (not) is my Grandparents telling me that they'd buy me a whole new wardrobe if I lost weight. My grandpa has since passed, but my grandma is still alive. I wonder if when I get to goal I'll get that wardrobe. They taunted me with the 'new wardrobe' carrot since I was about 5 years old. I didn't grow into the overweight person they said I was until I was about 14 years old. Nice.

Ah, yes, the new wardrobe ploy. Been dangled in front of me for many years by my parents. By me staying fat you'd think I'm being purposefully rebellious!

I can totally identify with a lot of your experiences. I don't really mind when strangers make snide comments about my weight, but when family members do, I think that is hitting below the belt.

Most of my family are supportive of me and my struggle to get my weight under control, but I have an Aunt that makes these so called helpful remarks--You know if you would exercise more you can lose the weight faster; or you know there are pills you can take to help you? do I have a headache???:wink2:

At one of my cousins wedding she gushed over the fact that I looked so good and she could see how much weight I had lost, (which was zero, I was wearing a killa girdle)Lol.:thumbup:

When she saw me the next day sans girdle, she was upset with me for fooling her, because clearly I was even bigger than she realized the night before and I should not have misled her.

Its funny to me that my lack of weight loss is offensive to her :confused2:

and what? I like walking aroung 130lbs overweight????

Isn't it hilarious (and pathetic) that your aunt somehow made it all about HER! It's not hard to tell where the center of her universe is!

Orea

some that I've heard

*in 6th grade some kid was behind me and yelled "God I hate it when fat people get in front of me"

*my mom would watch me making Soup for lunch and say how she'd rather have me be anorexic because I'd be rolling to school next year (That's when I was in 6th or 7th grade)

*My brother said I should lift weights because I had manly arms

*My cousins asked when I was in 5th grade why I had such manly legs.

I developed early and was 145 lbs and 5ft tall in 5th grade and with a 34C. Yeah I was awkward.

Also I have a friend who is skinny and always says stuff about how we can go walking together and lose weight. She has 10 lbs to lose, I have 140lbs. Oh and the "Oh you're not THAT big." I hate that.

And the "You'd be so pretty if you lost weight" or "You would have a great body if you lost that belly"