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Has anyone thought that maybe this doctor is trying to see if Tom is willing to work with the band or that maybe they're trying to point out that the band is a tool? The doctor might also be worried that if they tighten the band too much with this lack of control that Tom might be in immense danger of really hurting himself. I know that sneaking up on the sweet spot is a pain but there is a reason for it. Kaiser had us loose 10% of our overall weight not only to shrink our livers but to show them that we could commit ourselves to this lifestyle.

Sorry to sound so harsh but it's hard work to do this and it's time to re-evaluate why you did this.

Vicki

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Vicki, that is an excellent point. I have a 14cc band, I've had 4 fills, and I've lost 22 pounds since my heaviest weight. I'm not feeling a whole lot of restriction, and I'm hungry, but I count calories like a madwoman, and eat as much Protein as I can. I know that I am on a downward trend as far as weight goes, but I'm really just at the beginning of this whole process. I can see how it would be easy to gain weight if I didn't measure everything I eat. Nothing goes into my mouth before I know how many calories is in it, how that fits into my overall caloric intake, and whether or not it's a good idea. I just don't eat sweets. I eat meat, veggies, and the occasional carbs/starches. Once I get to my sweet spot, I am hopeful that the hunger will subside. Until then, I am working with what I have, which is a little restriction and a lot of will to lose!

Tom, I think you need to find another Dr. to oversee your treatment. I drive a couple of hours to downtown Chicago (due to traffic) to have my fills, and I can tell you one thing - if my Dr. ever withheld a fill from me, I would have some serious questions for him.

Take an honest look at yourself - maybe you have eating issues that haven't been adequately addressed? I know that I have plenty of head hunger, but I'm learning new habits these days; it's a lot of work. I have had moments of feeling like, "Why did I do this?!?!", but it passes, and when I lose the next pound or two, I realize that it's all worth it.

Check out my blog - Strength - The Lap-Band Chronicles - Tales of Joy

I talk about my emotional eating issues, and kind of go over where I've been with weight loss, and where I hope to be. I know that the band is not the complete answer; it's just a piece of the puzzle. The rest of it is up to me.

I wish you all the best, and that you get the support you need from your Dr., your family, and most of all, yourself. You're worth the effort!

Take care,

Sarah H.

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I was just about to post the exact same thing Vicki J just said. I think the Dr just wants to see you make a commitment to following the diet rules, cause it will make it easier for you when you do have restriction.

I have nothing in my band at the moment, I have just finished my two weeks of fluids and am now on mushies, but I have absolutely no restriction. Its so hard cooking lovely big meals for my family and sitting down to 1/2 cup of baby mush, but its gotta be worth it in the end.

I think you'll lose that 20lbs pretty fast once you stick to the plan. Its weight you have just put on so it should come of pretty quickly and then go and get that fill.

Edited by mumof2

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sorry to give some of you the wrong ideal on the 5lbs of food part. a better example would have been "a full dinner plate" as for sweets and ice cream, they dont come in the house. my son's 1st b-day party last saterday was prolly the 2nd time ive had cake sence march. most of what i eat comes from a can or a box out of the freezer section, we just dont take time to make meals. I do like the jenny O turkey roast but they have to cook almost 3 hrs. I am thinking about seeing another doc and asking for a 3cc fill for a total of 9cc but the next closest one is a 4hr round trip and theres no garentee he will give it to me.

Oh man, those Jenny O' Turkey roasts are really good, aren't they? And low in calories, high in Protein. Thanks for the dinner idea! :smile:

As far as the weightloss goes; if one thing doesn't work, try something else. You say you guys eat mostly out of a can or box - I did the same thing for a long time. You probably don't have the time to cook every day, but why not try it on the weekends? Make a big to-do of it and go for something really delicious like fetta spinich stuffed chicken breasts. Turn it into a five-star meal and exercise for dessert. Any small change may be just what you need in order to start losing.

Also, don't forget to keep an eye on your calorie intake - boxed, canned, and frozen meals can be pretty calorific.

Good luck and don't lose hope! It takes us all time to adjust to the band :thumbup:

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That's a great point, kossde. Protein really is key to losing weight and staying full. Even though I have hardly any restriction, with the little restriction that I *do* have, if I follow the plan and eat my Protein first, I *always* stay full longer. It never fails.

Also, eating more *lean* protein is healthier than eating lean carbs. Protein calories are more dense - you can get a lot fuller on protein than you can on carbs. It takes longer to digest the protein, and uses more calories to digest. Enzymes in one's mouth start breaking down sugars the second they hit your digestive tract, and it hardly takes any time to go straight to your bloodstream. It also takes hardly any time to leave your bloodstream, thus causing a sugar crash.

My secret weapon has been eating poultry, pork tenderloin (always extra lean) and veggies at both lunch and dinner. I also count calories. With my low level of restriction, I have to make sure that I don't eat too much. I also want to get into the habit of eating less, and eating the right foods.

Tom, if you stick with it, you will overcome these small obstacles. The bottom line is that if you're eating less calories than your body requires to maintain its weight, you will lose. If you eat more calories, you will gain. The band is meant to help with the hunger that so many of us struggle with. Try to see it as a tool, and see yourself as the ultimate answer to losing the weight. Again - you *are* worth it. You have a son - he's worth it too.

I know that when my daughter was born, I started seeing myself in a whole new light. I started getting honest with myself about my food issues. I thought I could be happy and overweight at the same time, and that is just not true. I thought I could continue to diet and that "this time I'll lose the weight FOR GOOD". It just doesn't happen that way for some people. I've had to work *really* hard to lose these 22 or so pounds, and even though it's hard, it's been a LOT easier since I got the band.

I hope you succeed and find the answers you're looking for.

Take care,

Sarah H.

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At first you still have that urge to eat and alot.......lets face it, thats why we were fat. But after some fills you will get to the point that your not hungry all the time and you can control it. How long has your dr been doing this kind of surgery, it doesn't sound like she gets it. The fills helped me alot, without them I would still be fat. The fills took away the urge to eat, I very seldom get hungry now.

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dr velcu should know that im commetid to it. I lost 79lbs from my first pre op oppenment till my band was put in. (end of nov to march 11th) then as soon as it was in its been a battle. like i said I gained 15lbs while in the hospital just from iv fluids.. I called the only other doc in my area and they wont take another docs patiants. I wish they would because ive seen them fetured on the show (big medicine). O well I guess its chicken breast and Beans for 2 weeks then ill beg my doc for a bigger fill then she has been giving.

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Do the same thing you did to loose the 79 lbs.! Obviously you have the drive to be able to do this. I understand how discouraging this gets when you don't have the right restriction. Veggies (not loaded with fats) are a great way to fill up the needed bulk. Be careful though because they can be hard to digest if you're a newbie and they are raw.

I know I get where I pout a lot because even with restriction I enjoy my food so much I want to be able to eat more. Of course, I've gotten where I tell myself that I can have more...LATER! As far as cooking goes, I eat out more than I eat at home. I realize that I have to be careful because of hidden calories and I look up what I'm going to have online and journal it. I'd be lost without fitday. Cooking is the best way to go but a calorie is a calorie and keeping it under 1200 is the key. Since banding and the right adjustments I usually stayed under 1000 to give myself the extra "hidden" calories. Now I'm trying to adjust my eating to maintain. It scares me to give myself permission to "add" calories. LOL

Instead of chicken breast and Beans how about chicken breast and a veggie like squash or brocoli? You can eat a whole lot more of some veggies than others and Beans have a lot of carbs in them. Carbs can be good but carbs can also make you feel hungry sooner. The carbs in some veggies are less in both the amount and how soon they make you hungry. This is why Chineese food doesn't keep you full longer. (I still love it).

Never go more than 4 hours between Breakfast, lunch or dinner. At my work I have a 5 hour lapse in between Breakfast and lunch so I incorporate a snack of 1 Protein and a fruit or bread. So I might have a piece of string cheese and an apple or some crackers.

The final thing that you need to do is go over in your mind what's been said in the appointments. I discovered that my doctor had a hard time justifying a fill because I was loosing everytime I went in. I kept telling him I was hungry and he was afraid I was trying to make the band do all the work. When I found out what was the problem I let him know that I was restricting myself to 1200 and excercising 3x per week and "Of course I would loose." I had already lost over 70 pounds that way waiting for surgery on their pre-op diet. I told him that I was in this to loose weight and so I had every intention to continue as I had pre-op. The light bulb went on and he started giving me fills when I said I thought I needed them. He couldn't believe when I cancelled my last appt for a fill because I told him I was ok with where I was. So you have to make sure that the doctor is understanding your message. I took in my food journal to show them what I was eating, I wrote down when I got hungry and how much I had eaten. You have to give them the whole picture.

I also sometimes found that what I thought I had eaten may not have been enough or may have been eaten with too much time in between the last meal. Our minds do play with us.

You can do this and with some work on your doctor's part and your part you can make it a workable relationship.

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Great post Tom. I had surgery april 30, lost 18 the first month and now am slowly gaining. I have very little restriction right now, but this post has reminded me that the lap-band takes work, and time! Its not an overnight fix! I go in for fill # 3 tomorrow and am praying for more restriction!

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I think I've decided that nobody should be allowed to be a band surgeon until they've had a lapband for themselves.

Its like a woman trying to explain to a man how it feels to have a baby. Men can be experts on it, they can know all the theory, they can deliver babies and look after pregnant women, usually very competently. But they simply cannot know how it feels.

Likewise a surgeon who doesnt have a band and hasnt ever been fat. There is no way that they're not falling into the mentality of a person who doesnt know what its like to have an out of control appetite. They just dont "get it" and you can bet your bottom dollar that they're privately thinking "sheesh, just stop eating so much!".

Some surgeons are better than others of course. But 6cc in a 14cc band is quite possibly hardly ANY restriction for some people. You just need more.

You sound like you know you've got to work the band, you've got to exercise etc. But its all a LOT easier with decent restriction. I'd demand another fill or find another doctor. If you've already lost 79lb (awesome!) then no doubt you've exhausted your easy run, that first initial weight loss that comes easily to nearly all of us and THEN some. Your body is obviously not going to lose now without drastically reduced portion sizes and calorie restriction and for that you need more than just wise food choices, you need your band working!

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I agree Jachut 100%.

I am a little surprised by some of those here that have bands and automatically sided against Tom. Yes, the band is a tool one that works when we do our part AND when we are at proper restriction. If he is hungry and feels that a fill would work then by all means, the doctor should allow the tool to work and give him a fill. He knows his body better than anyone else. His band is not even half filled yet. What was the point in getting the band and then being denied a fill and be told to lose weight on your own? If I had zero restriction and my surgeon told me to lose the weight on my own without a fill I would be pissed.

Edited by Jodi_620

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Jodi, I don't think anyone is "siding against Tom". We have all been where Tom is (as far as gaining weight goes). I think that Tom's Dr. should definitely give him another fill if he wants one ... but looking at it from the physician's perspective, maybe she doesn't want him to hurt himself by overeating or eating too fast (because - let's face it - it HURTS). If Tom is having pb's after eating bread, then his band probably *is* working.

I'm at 6cc's in a 14cc band right now, and I feel *a little* restriction, especially in the mornings. BUT I'm losing 2+ pounds per week, because I watch my caloric intake, and I journal every bit of food that goes into my mouth. I'm not eating enough to *gain* weight.

There must be a couple of things happening in Tom's case - one, his band is not working (yet), and two, he's eating enough to *gain*. If Tom had maintained his initial weight loss, his Dr. would likely be far more willing to give him as many fills as he desired.

I do know that my surgeon will not give fills to people who have gained weight, and I think that makes sense (outside of any major health issues that might cause weight gain, such as taking certain medications).

I'm on Tom's side, and I want him to do what's best for him, which is to lose weight. Sometimes thinking realistically is the best way to think, instead of placing blame in one place, which could possibly be ill-founded belief. If we all blamed lack of weight loss on our bands, we would probably have not lost any weight at all. Most of the weight loss is up to each of us, not just the band. That's really all I'm saying, not trying to be for or against anyone.

Best,

Sarah H.

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Sarah - I totally agree with you. It's sad that trying to find a way to help as well as commensorate with someone is automatically thought of as being against someone. I'm with you and I want Tom to be a wild success at this. Sometimes understanding how a doctor thinks helps to communicate with the doctor.

Tom - Weigh and measure all of your food, journal EVERYTHING, and keep track of your weight loss regularly. Eat banster size meals (3 oz lean Protein, .5 - 1 C of produce and maybe a snack of fruit or multigrain products) THIS IS NOT BECAUSE I THINK YOU'RE MESSING UP! This is because if you take all this information into your doctor you will give her a good picture of what is going on. Also, add into your journal where you're eating, how you're eating and how long that meal lasts. If you are hungry and can't survive on bandster portions, fill up on veggies. These need to be veggies without fats added.

Arm yourself with facts when you go and see your doctor. Keep in mind that it takes a while for us to Iron out what we're doing and why. For the first time in over a year I finally realized I am so bored with food. Eating now is not a reason for waking up but it is for nourishment. Finally I feel like I have broken free of my dependence on it for solving my problems, keeping me company, etc. It sure feels good to have escaped the chains that bound me for so long. You will get here too. I can't say when because we are all individuals. But you will get here.

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I know what Tom is going through. I have had 4 fills and had my band placed in Mexico on July 4th. After that long you don't always make the best choices in food. If we didn't have a problem with food we would not have had the surgery. I am not back to my old habits but having a band and nothing to help you is a very sad feeling. I have 9cc's in a 9cc band. I thought Realize bands had 10cc's but they say it is 9cc's. My doctor also can't believe me that I don't have restriction. Don't judge the people that don't have what you have and that is restriction. It has been almost 4 months since I stated this journey and that is long enough waiting for some relief and some movement on the scale.< /p>

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Joiful, I understand that it must be frustrating not to have restriction, but I kind of find it hard to believe that the 9cc's in your band are still there. Your Dr. should pull all the saline out to confirm how much there is before he/she decides whether or not to give you more fills.

No one here is against Tom - I want Tom *and* you to both know the feeling of early satiety. I realized after I got the band that I wasn't as much of an emotional eater as I thought - my surgeon confirmed to me that I have a large stomach ... But he also told me not to get too hung up on it.

I have had four fills, and I feel that I am ALMOST at my sweet spot. food still goes through too fast, but I am definitely able to go for longer and longer periods without eating, AND without feeling hungry.

I strongly suggest that both you and Tom check out Melissa McCreery's emotional eating seminars. She addresses the issues people face regarding emotional hunger, and how a person's brain begins to see emotional need as physical hunger, when it is *emotional* hunger and need that should be addressed. Try to have an open mind, and address issues that might be preventing you from feeling full. Part of this process of losing weight is just acknowledging that we are imperfect, and that we just are who we are, for better or for worse. Self-love should be uncomplicated, but it's not.

Just a word from someone who has been through many many painful episodes of self-discovery. I am who I am, and I love who I am ... I hope you find that for yourself.

Best regards,

Sarah H.

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