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98% ready, then the 2% doubt starts creeping in....



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Hello my new friends,

I have wanted to get the sleeve surgery for many years. I've just completed my 6 month supervised diet. I am scheduled for my labs and EGD very soon. Then I can get on the surgical schedule. 98% of me is jumping for joy and so eager to get started on this new journey! I am 52 years old, 5ft tall and 252#. My reasons are that I want to get healthier. I want to be able to exercise without getting so winded. I had to run to catch a plane a few weeks ago and I just couldn't keep up with my family. I want to be able to roll over in bed without it causing earthquake motion. I would love to get off of my CPAP. I have grandbabies who are 2 and 1. My husband and I go to Disney all the time and I would like to take them. I know the tool of this surgery would help me! I am ready for the hard work and lifestyle change!

Now, the 2% ....I have been blessed with good health, despite obesity. Am I being selfish to risk something horrible happening during surgery or a complication after? I can't stand the thought of voluntarily going in for an elective procedure and coming out worse than going in? I hear all of the horror stories about people dying, having strokes, being sick forever.

I would appreciate any logical and rational thinking to read when that 2% sneaks in. :)

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Hello!

I too was like you, lucky to not really have any health problems. I did have borderline high blood pressure. Also, GERD which may or may not be weight related.

But, I justified it by knowing my family genes and that my time would be coming. Everyone is my family is obese and they ALL have a list of health problems. I knew if I didn't do something to loose weight and keep it off that my day was coming. I would wake up and have all kinds of issues.

I am not about 7 weeks post-op and I have NO REGRETS!

There is also risks because because you are healthy the risks get lower.

You have to do what is right for you but I am pro surgery!

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When I had my surgery done, I knew I wanted it and it was almost a life or death decision for me. I wanted a life that did not include bad knees, breathlessness and diabetes. I was so embarrassed of my weight that I never went outdoors. For me it was a no brainer. I paid as quick as I could. I had a rough ride in the beginning but I am over it now and away and pacing. I am so happy with my choice.

I cant make your fears go away but I can show you some more success stories. Go and look at the before and after threads. They go back 20 years and give wonderful motivation. Millions of people have had this done and very few of them have problems. I don't know the numbers.

All I can say is if you have doubts, wait until you are 100% ready. You know when you know !

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My BMI was on the low end and my knees were only beginning to hurt and only with vigorous exercise so I was kinda like you. It wasn’t like I was unhealthy. but I knew that I was gaining weight year after year so it was only a matter of time before my knees hurt worse and limited my movement more making me gain even more weight and that would limit me even further. It was just beginning but it was going to snowball out of control. There were other reasons that I did it though, I was sitting out of things because I was embarrassed of my size or I didn’t have anything to wear that I felt good in and stuff like that and Despite all the crazy diets I tried i was only going to gain more. I am now over a year out and I had very little pain post op and no food intolerances or anything like that. I did not lose as much weight as I hoped. I reached my first goal which was an easy one but couldn’t reach the second. I am on meds that make weight loss a little more difficult. My point is that I did not get to my dream weight but I am still VERY glad that I did it because I am at least comfortable at this weight to go out and live my life again.

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If you've accepted the risk then you wouldn't be prepared to beat yourself up for making a decision that resulted, completely out of your control, in a less than positive outcome. Accepting the risk means making the best of any result.

I don't think you realize it but you are loaded with conflict, the result of which is you can't win:

"I have been blessed with good health, despite obesity" except: "I want to get healthier, " and "I want to be able to exercise without getting so winded," and " I had to run to catch a plane a few weeks ago and I just couldn't keep up with my family," and " I want to be able to roll over in bed without it causing earthquake motion", and " I would love to get off of my CPAP." Are you "healthy" or not? pick one.

Then there is your selfish desire to "My husband and I go to Disney all the time and I would like to take them [the Grandkids]"

You've talked yourself into a fine no-win scenario: You talk about surgical horror stories you've read that lead to death, stroke, being sick forever. Not unsurprisingly these are also major complications of morbid obesity. You can kick yourself for getting surgery and not getting surgery!

Which path will you regret more? Trying and failing or not trying at all. My philosophy is that the path I choose will work out for the best. It's this philosophy or living in regret.

Good luck,

Tek

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I had all the high nerves weeks abs days before surgery. But the morning of my surgery. I wasn't scared or nervous at all. I was completely relaxed.

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All those horror stories on the net are the exception and/or trolling. The majority of us are better now after surgery and wish we got it sooner. For me, being obese I already had one foot in the grave. I have several comorbities which I do not have any more. WLS gave me my life back, as it will you. Hang in there.

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That was me too. (Similar demographics too.) No health issues just not really healthy & fit. But I knew those comorbidities were in my future.

All surgeries have risks but weight loss surgery risks are pretty low. You’re going into the surgery pretty healthy, all things considered, so you are in a stronger place than some others with a higher weight & existing comobidities. Ask your surgeon for their stats.

It’s perfect ok to have a degree of apprehension about the surgery. It is something you’ve no experience of & changes will be made to your body. Those changes don’t really hinder or restrict your future life in any way but they will allow you to live a better life. You have fabulous reasons for proceeding but it is your choice.

As @The Greater Fool said the negative stories you’ve read about surgery are the same side effects as not having surgery & continuing to be obese &/or gain more weight. Plus the horror stories make the better online stories. Good news & happy experiences don’t so are much harder to find.

Since my surgery I do have an issue with low blood pressure. But this is a pre existing genetic issue & I would experience it when I was a lower weight in the past. Ironically, the weight I was carrying actually kept my blood pressure at a healthy 120/80. The surgery can’t change your genetic pre disposition to health issues but the weight loss may delay or reduce the severity.

All the best.

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I'm not afraid of the surgery, but am nervous of the possible long term consequences. Does anyone know if we will ALWAYS have to sip Water instead of just drinking it? And will I always have to chew my food 30 times before I swallow? How does life look a year down the road? I have a relatively low BMI (started at 36.1, am now below 35) but have struggled with weighing 30-50 lbs more than I should for almost 40 years. I'm also a healthy 78 yrs. old, so a bit riskier for me.

You all just the best group of people I have ever come across, brave, compassionate, smart and willing to give your time to help us newbies. Thanks so much!

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17 minutes ago, Reluctantsleever said:

I'm not afraid of the surgery, but am nervous of the possible long term consequences. Does anyone know if we will ALWAYS have to sip Water instead of just drinking it? And will I always have to chew my food 30 times before I swallow? How does life look a year down the road? I have a relatively low BMI (started at 36.1, am now below 35) but have struggled with weighing 30-50 lbs more than I should for almost 40 years. I'm also a healthy 78 yrs. old, so a bit riskier for me.

You all just the best group of people I have ever come across, brave, compassionate, smart and willing to give your time to help us newbies. Thanks so much!

Most people are able to drink Water relatively normal before they are a year out. It will be advised that you always chew your food well and eat slower because it allows you to get that full signal from your brain before you overeat but I don’t think everyone still chews 30 times at a year out. I know I don’t but I didn’t ever have issues with food going down. I chewed it really well through all the post op phases but by the time I got to normal foods I was only eating a little slower then I did pre op. I think I am the exception though in that.

i get what you are saying about the risk. I am a little younger but I was a lower BMI as well. I was a 35 BMI when I started the process. A little Less at time of surgery. I was just beginning to get knee pain with heavy exercise though and I was steadily gaining like 5-10 pounds a year despite the yo yo diets so I knew it was just a matter of time before that started to limit me physically. I wanted to get ahead of it. It was also limiting me going out and doing things I enjoy simply because I felt uncomfortable or couldn’t find clothes I felt comfortable in, etc. I decided that life is too short to stay locked in the house not liking myself if there was another option. I am over a year out now. Down 55 pounds and couldn’t be happier that I did the surgery.

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3 hours ago, Reluctantsleever said:

Does anyone know if we will ALWAYS have to sip Water instead of just drinking it? And will I always have to chew my food 30 times before I swallow? How does life look a year down the road?

No you won’t always have to sip. Whether you’ll be able to guzzle & gulp is really an individual thing & an idiosyncrasy of your own new digestive system. Some find they can guzzle fluids a short time after surgery. Me I’m a two big gulps (4 swallows) & then I have to wait a couple of minutes & I worked up to that over about two years. You’ll also find you won’t have to wait the full 30 minutes before/after eating. I’m generally okay with a 5 min interval if I’m sipping but not gulping.

I was never told to chew multiple times. But I kept my food pretty moist & I only took small bites. I used a teaspoon or a spork. I still cut up my meat to small bite size pieces when at home & never have mouthfuls of food. I still eat slowly too - 30-60 minutes for the about recommended portion size meals I eat now. If I eat too fast or too much or eat food that is too dry my restriction will kick in but that happens rarely now. It’s all about being mindful when you eat.

At a year, I’d been maintaining for 6 months. I was eating whatever I wanted. I’d already made a lot of adjustments to how & what I ate & came to understand why I ate. There are foods I’ve chosen not to eat or rarely eat. But even before I reached goal I was just living my life. Socialising, eating out, even went on a girls’ weekend away. Sure I had to be careful with my food choices but I wasn’t restricted in anyway.

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